Benzos have a range of effects, and they do different things to different people. Some benzos are hypnotic, some cause muscle relaxation, some are sedating, some are anxiolytic. They are not all created equally. Just because Xanax makes you retarded does not mean Klonopin will.
I really don't get the Xanax craze. Yes, it is a powerful benzo that hits you hard and fast. But even if Xanax makes you feel like you're shitting rainbows what's the point? You won't remember it the next day.
In my opinion (yours may be totally different, and that's more than okay, that's great) Xanax is only good for a very few things. It's good when you're coming off of Meth/Crack/Cocaine/Adderall, it's good when you absolutely need to sleep, and it's good for people that have to confront their fears, like flying for example. Really, I think Xanax is one of the most overprescribed benzos out there, and I partially blame this for the US crackdown on benzos.
Klonopin or Ativan, on the other hand, have a range of positive effects, ranging from the therapeutic to the recreational. Plus they don't make me (and probably a lot of other people out there) act like a fucking moron.
Note: Take enough of any psychoactive substance and you'll act like a fucking moron.