EADD Heroin thread v.XXV -- a quarter centuary of threads if not yet a full decade since the 'drought'...

[BadBoy377]

Yeah we are @ChemicallyEnhanced also mentioned Exorcist too. Both great.

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

I guess it might if you're unfortunate enough to develop fully blown, irreversible, terminal, colon cancer.

But the pre-cancerous polyp wasn't causing me any bother that I noticed.

^Glad you didn't suffer much!

I actually might have the malignant cancer kind (wait, bowel, not colon).
My paternal grandmother had bowel cancer and they found she had a gene where, if you have that gene, there is a 100% chance that you will develop bowel cancer at some point in your life. There's a 50% chance of passing it on to your child if you have it, which means there's a 50% my dad has it (50% chance he will definitely get bowel cancer). You can be tested for it, but he doesn't want to know. Since if I were to test positive for it, he would obviously know that HE had it, so I haven't been tested to respect what he wants. And I'm fine not knowing.
But, yeah, basically there is a 25% chance that there is a 100% chance that I will get bowel cancer.

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

I thought we were talking about Requiem For a Dream?

We were but I went on to mention Ellen Burstyn's amazing performance in that movie and then, in passing, mentioned The Exorcist, which she also stars in, playing the mother.

P.S. I keep meaning to ask: who is that in your avitar? He's beautiful.

 

[Bleaney]

We were but I went on to mention Ellen Burstyn's amazing performance in that movie and then, in passing, mentioned The Exorcist, which she also stars in, playing the mother.

P.S. I keep meaning to ask: who is that in your avitar? He's beautiful.

Yeah her performance was amazing, but so were Jared Leto and Jennifer Connelly? Just a great film, although certainly very dark.

The guy in the avatar is a young Jim Reid, the singer in The Jesus and Mary Chain.

^Glad you didn't suffer much!

I actually might have the malignant cancer kind (wait, bowel, not colon).
My paternal grandmother had bowel cancer and they found she had a gene where, if you have that gene, there is a 100% chance that you will develop bowel cancer at some point in your life. There's a 50% chance of passing it on to your child if you have it, which means there's a 50% my dad has it (50% chance he will definitely get bowel cancer). You can be tested for it, but he doesn't want to know. Since if I were to test positive for it, he would obviously know that HE had it, so I haven't been tested to respect what he wants. And I'm fine not knowing.
But, yeah, basically there is a 25% chance that there is a 100% chance that I will get bowel cancer.

Thanks!

I'd want to know, no I'd need to know, in fact regarding that situation. Isn't it generally the case for cancers that the earlier they are tested for and treated, if necessary, the much higher the probability of a positive prognosis?

 

[BadBoy377]

I'd want to know, no I'd need to know, in fact regarding that situation. Isn't it generally the case for cancers that the earlier they are tested for and treated, if necessary, the much higher the probability of a positive prognosis?

Yep.

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

Yeah her performance was amazing, but so were Jared Leto and Jennifer Connelly? Just a great film, although certainly very dark.

The guy in the avatar is a young Jim Reid, the singer in The Jesus and Mary Chain.


Thanks!

I'd want to know, no I'd need to know, in fact regarding that situation. Isn't it generally the case for cancers that the earlier they are tested for and treated, if necessary, the much higher the probability of a positive prognosis?

Thanks. I've actually never heard of him or the group, but gonna check them out now.

Agreed; I think all of the performances in that movie were fantastic, I just felt with Sara Goldfarb...like, it's hard to explain...in some scenes it's like she IS her, not just acting.

Yeah, that's true about cancer and a good point. I don't mean this in a depressing way (I'm actually in a pretty good mood right now) or to be disrespectful to anyone with cancer...I just find it hard to care if I get it or not. That's about what happens to me in general, not cancer-specific and I obviously do not WANT anything like that.
It's difficult to explain the mindset I often have because I'm not in it right now. When I've had plenty of pills, I'm mostly happy and content, but otherwise I'm always on this border of whether I wanna live or die. Not to the extent that I would ever attempt suicide; I don't even consider it, but in those times - any time I'm not high, basically - it's like I'd like it if I could just die organically, like by illness or accident :/
I'm probably explaining this REALLY badly and making myself sound like a cunt. I apologise of this post depressed or just annoyed anyone.

 

[puke]

I thought we were talking about Requiem For a Dream?

Speaking of The Exorcist check out this shirt I got. I have like 7-8 shirts for that movie.

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

Speaking of The Exorcist check out this shirt I got. I have like 7-8 shirts for that movie.

Cool!

 

[Ismene2]

Anyone tried really pure no 4 china white? Any difference to the afghan creme shit or is it just a case of same effect for less drug?

 

[Bleaney]

Anyone tried really pure no 4 china white? Any difference to the afghan creme shit or is it just a case of same effect for less drug?

Afghan Cream is meant to be premium top draw stuff. Or at least it was when an experienced user acquired some of that for himself, and for me, some time ago. He confirmed that it was top quality. I wouldn't have known the difference, and didn't feel anything anyway . Maybe the market places are mis-advertising stuff these days, they certainly were for those"Quaaludes" that weren't actually Quaaludes at all, and were weak as fuck.

As for pure no 4 china white, sorry I don't know. From the title, you'd imagine it'd be great. but again it seems you cant trust that you will be actually sent exactly what is being advertised.

 

[matt<3ketamine]

Oh, I don't know what Entonox is (just googled it now) ohhh I see. I assumed from context is was a brand name for some benzo.

If you're also in the UK I have no idea why they'd give you Nitrous and me Midazolam and Fent, maybe just depends on the hospital? I know my dad was also given Midazolam for a colonoscopy.

same, i had one there just last month and got 3mg Midazolam. If they were only gonna give me nitrous, i wouldn't have been a happy client.
Dunno why they wouldn't give you Midazolam @Bleaney And I even said before sedation, "any 'opioid' type of 'sedation' won't work on me cuz of my medication interacting with them" (buprenorphine) and still was given some Midaz. It's a fantastic benzo IV, never found it 'interesting/fun' without a pin in a vein though. Not even plugging felt anywhere near that 'rush' of calm

 

[Bleaney]

same, i had one there just last month and got 3mg Midazolam. If they were only gonna give me nitrous, i wouldn't have been a happy client.
Dunno why they wouldn't give you Midazolam @Bleaney And I even said before sedation, "any 'opioid' type of 'sedation' won't work on me cuz of my medication interacting with them" (buprenorphine) and still was given some Midaz. It's a fantastic benzo IV, never found it 'interesting/fun' without a pin in a vein though. Not even plugging felt anywhere near that 'rush' of calm

I was actually more than fine on just the Entonox, perhaps it was a particularly easy and not very far up the colon case, the polyp was actually in the rectum area IIRC, and incredibly easy to remove, so they didn't have to go poking around long distances up my colon, and the surgeon located and removed the polyp in no time. The whole thing probably took less than five minutes! Ten at the most! The main delay was getting me breathing properly on the Entonox before they could start. So it was obviously important that I was going to get the full effects of he Entonox. It was good stuff. I felt on top of the world afterwards for some time!

Although I'm sure that IV midazolam and fent would obviously have been a whole different league. I kind of hope I never need that kind of pain and anxiety relief, as it must only be used for more difficult and painful cases, but if I ever do need it, there will be a silver lining in the cloud!

 

[matt<3ketamine]

I was actually more than fine on just the Entonox, perhaps it was a particularly easy and not very far up the colon case, the polyp was actually in the rectum area IIRC, and incredibly easy to remove, so they didn't have to go poking around long distances up my colon, and the surgeon located and removed the polyp in no time. The whole thing probably took less than five minutes! Ten at the most! The main delay was getting me breathing properly on the Entonox before they could start. So it was obviously important that I was going to get the full effects of he Entonox. It was good stuff. I felt on top of the world afterwards for some time!

Although I'm sure that IV midazolam and fent would obviously have been a whole different league. I kind of hope I never need that kind of pain and anxiety relief, as it must only be used for more difficult and painful cases, but if I ever do need it, there will be a silver lining in the cloud!

If that works for you, that's brilliant! Unfortunately, i find little relief of anxiety from nitrous i found out at the dentist, when i was still curling my toes and grabbing the chair whilst they were 'at max' apparently, it felt like just half an average whippet dose.
Well...did you also get that 'blown up like a balloon' feeling? hahaha, that was a 'unique' feeling. Though the procedure was only about 15-20max mins, aye. Let's just say 'blood' was what they were looking for, so as to not get into disgusting details lol.
Wasn't gave any fent, but the one time i had surgery on my teeth, they were gonna give me Midazolam and fent, but they had to change it to Ketamine and Midazolam (which came in a single vial and i cannot for the life of me remember the name of the brand or find a picture of it online anywhere fs), only after i explained i was on buprenorphine and it's action on fent not working to it's best ability (cuz the fent would have either done little to nothing for me, that or cuz they heard subutex = 'he could become addicted again' type thinking maybe?). First shot i felt a bit of relaxation from the midazolam for sure, 2nd shot, i felt more of the ketamine starting to slightly work, then they stated they had to get on with the surgery.
Then came the Lidocaine and Propofol
Propofol is a helluva drug, the lidocaine added at the start did nothing: literally felt like lava was running through the vein a nurse found on the back of my hand, then wrapped around to the other side of my hand and into my wrist, up the inside of my arm and then = lights out, can't remember anything else.
After i came out of it, i was STILL in pain, nurse had to give me 2 more shots of ketamine and the last one i only got when my mum came to pick me up and watch over me but seen i was mostly sober, gripping the gurney and tearing up in pain. So she asked about what about pain relief for me and the nurse said i had been very sedated already, to which my mum, shocking me learning this side of her, said:
"Sedated?! He's talking away to me fine though, i've seen him VERY sedated, sadly, but sorry, i have seen much more from him than you have. Naked and banging around the walls like a pinball in our bathroom in 'that ketamine hole' (lol she forgot the term for it), this isn't anywhere near sedated, if he can talk away to me fine and is not in la la land!"
then she looked at the other patients, who were practically in k-holes or nodding out
"oh...okay, be right back" and 20 odd mins later, she returned with one last but bigger dose of ketamine. That settled the pain down for an hour. When we were leaving, the nurses were shocked i didn't need a wheelchair or to even hold onto my mum's shoulder.
Then an hour later, i was back in pain, with multiple types of pain killers at disposal, but just, no way of being able to use them in the next 24-36hr's. So i started doing lines of bupe to dull the pain slightly.

Sorry, got a bit side tracked there rambling lol I feel safe rambling here though, as this place has managed to keep the 'i can't be bothered knowing stuff' types away. Love this place.

 

[Bleaney]

If that works for you, that's brilliant! Unfortunately, i find little relief of anxiety from nitrous i found out at the dentist, when i was still curling my toes and grabbing the chair whilst they were 'at max' apparently, it felt like just half an average whippet dose.
Well...did you also get that 'blown up like a balloon' feeling? hahaha, that was a 'unique' feeling. Though the procedure was only about 15-20max mins, aye. Let's just say 'blood' was what they were looking for, so as to not get into disgusting details lol.
Wasn't gave any fent, but the one time i had surgery on my teeth, they were gonna give me Midazolam and fent, but they had to change it to Ketamine and Midazolam (which came in a single vial and i cannot for the life of me remember the name of the brand or find a picture of it online anywhere fs), only after i explained i was on buprenorphine and it's action on fent not working to it's best ability (cuz the fent would have either done little to nothing for me, that or cuz they heard subutex = 'he could become addicted again' type thinking maybe?). First shot i felt a bit of relaxation from the midazolam for sure, 2nd shot, i felt more of the ketamine starting to slightly work, then they stated they had to get on with the surgery.
Then came the Lidocaine and Propofol
Propofol is a helluva drug, the lidocaine added at the start did nothing: literally felt like lava was running through the vein a nurse found on the back of my hand, then wrapped around to the other side of my hand and into my wrist, up the inside of my arm and then = lights out, can't remember anything else.
After i came out of it, i was STILL in pain, nurse had to give me 2 more shots of ketamine and the last one i only got when my mum came to pick me up and watch over me but seen i was mostly sober, gripping the gurney and tearing up in pain. So she asked about what about pain relief for me and the nurse said i had been very sedated already, to which my mum, shocking me learning this side of her, said:
"Sedated?! He's talking away to me fine though, i've seen him VERY sedated, sadly, but sorry, i have seen much more from him than you have. Naked and banging around the walls like a pinball in our bathroom in 'that ketamine hole' (lol she forgot the term for it), this isn't anywhere near sedated, if he can talk away to me fine and is not in la la land!"
then she looked at the other patients, who were practically in k-holes or nodding out
"oh...okay, be right back" and 20 odd mins later, she returned with one last but bigger dose of ketamine. That settled the pain down for an hour. When we were leaving, the nurses were shocked i didn't need a wheelchair or to even hold onto my mum's shoulder.
Then an hour later, i was back in pain, with multiple types of pain killers at disposal, but just, no way of being able to use them in the next 24-36hr's. So i started doing lines of bupe to dull the pain slightly.

Sorry, got a bit side tracked there rambling lol I feel safe rambling here though, as this place has managed to keep the 'i can't be bothered knowing stuff' types away. Love this place.

I did also have my usual dose of benzos beforehand, and I guess that would have combined very nicely with the Entonox.

I'm due to get surgery to repair a hernia, but I have a dilemma that I havent been able to solve yet. The surgery will involve going under propofol, and as I also take benzos, I know the combo can be lethal, as per Michael Jackson, although he took large doses of multiple benzos, and he took a much higher total benzo dose than I do.

Never the less I'm still worried. I cant easily openly declare my benzo use, so that maybe they could adjust the propofol dose accordingly, or maybe they'd just tell me flat out that it's not safe on my Bz dose. If I was to disclose my Bz use, that would more than likely get back to my GP, and that would have all sorts of bad consequences that I don't want to go into right now.

 

[BadBoy377]

If that works for you, that's brilliant! Unfortunately, i find little relief of anxiety from nitrous i found out at the dentist, when i was still curling my toes and grabbing the chair whilst they were 'at max' apparently, it felt like just half an average whippet dose.
Well...did you also get that 'blown up like a balloon' feeling? hahaha, that was a 'unique' feeling. Though the procedure was only about 15-20max mins, aye. Let's just say 'blood' was what they were looking for, so as to not get into disgusting details lol.
Wasn't gave any fent, but the one time i had surgery on my teeth, they were gonna give me Midazolam and fent, but they had to change it to Ketamine and Midazolam (which came in a single vial and i cannot for the life of me remember the name of the brand or find a picture of it online anywhere fs), only after i explained i was on buprenorphine and it's action on fent not working to it's best ability (cuz the fent would have either done little to nothing for me, that or cuz they heard subutex = 'he could become addicted again' type thinking maybe?). First shot i felt a bit of relaxation from the midazolam for sure, 2nd shot, i felt more of the ketamine starting to slightly work, then they stated they had to get on with the surgery.
Then came the Lidocaine and Propofol
Propofol is a helluva drug, the lidocaine added at the start did nothing: literally felt like lava was running through the vein a nurse found on the back of my hand, then wrapped around to the other side of my hand and into my wrist, up the inside of my arm and then = lights out, can't remember anything else.
After i came out of it, i was STILL in pain, nurse had to give me 2 more shots of ketamine and the last one i only got when my mum came to pick me up and watch over me but seen i was mostly sober, gripping the gurney and tearing up in pain. So she asked about what about pain relief for me and the nurse said i had been very sedated already, to which my mum, shocking me learning this side of her, said:
"Sedated?! He's talking away to me fine though, i've seen him VERY sedated, sadly, but sorry, i have seen much more from him than you have. Naked and banging around the walls like a pinball in our bathroom in 'that ketamine hole' (lol she forgot the term for it), this isn't anywhere near sedated, if he can talk away to me fine and is not in la la land!"
then she looked at the other patients, who were practically in k-holes or nodding out
"oh...okay, be right back" and 20 odd mins later, she returned with one last but bigger dose of ketamine. That settled the pain down for an hour. When we were leaving, the nurses were shocked i didn't need a wheelchair or to even hold onto my mum's shoulder.
Then an hour later, i was back in pain, with multiple types of pain killers at disposal, but just, no way of being able to use them in the next 24-36hr's. So i started doing lines of bupe to dull the pain slightly.

Sorry, got a bit side tracked there rambling lol I feel safe rambling here though, as this place has managed to keep the 'i can't be bothered knowing stuff' types away. Love this place.

Ramble away, friend. It's good to let it out.

 

[matt<3ketamine]

I did also have my usual dose of benzos beforehand, and I guess that would have combined very nicely with the Entonox.

I'm due to get surgery to repair a hernia, but I have a dilemma that I havent been able to solve yet. The surgery will involve going under propofol, and as I also take benzos, I know the combo can be lethal, as per Michael Jackson, although he took large doses of multiple benzos, and he took a much higher total benzo dose than I do.

Never the less I'm still worried. I cant easily openly declare my benzo use, so that maybe they could adjust the propofol dose accordingly, or maybe they'd just tell me flat out that it's not safe on my Bz dose. If I was to disclose my Bz use, that would more than likely get back to my GP, and that would have all sorts of bad consequences that I don't want to go into right now.

Aye that is a worrying factor: being on benzo's and/or pregab and NOT being able to say to the Dr's because of fear it will reach back up the chain to your GP. Seriously, if GP's would grow some balls and say to people that if they are going into surgery and they MAY be taking another medication that ISN'T prescribed by them, they could just prescribe either a lower dose of it to take for that day OR realize that them not prescribing them in these situations IS LIKELY to cause more potential harm than them NOT prescribing it BECAUSE of your exact reasons (Fear of true medical help in the future because...'labelled addict/drug seeker').

I've a procedure coming up where i'm gonna likely have propofol again and now this has me concerned, as you said, think about what happened to MJ with it + benzos. What would constitute 'too many/much' in your system? Would it be safer to take them the night before and hope the effects have worn off by the time of propofol administration? (diaz's half life is so long, i wonder if it'd be better switching to a shorter lasting benzo few days before, clean out the diaz half life, take, say, lorazepam or something with a shorter half life, the day before and the morning of - take nothing until after the operation and have left the hospital, since the midazolam should keep you good and out of WD's during the procedure?)

Cheers for the heads up on this thinking, your one smart cookie!! Will try knock my dosing down a fair bit (normally 20mg diaz a day suits me grand and try stick to that, so might switch to 15mg for this week, then over to maybe Loraz or something that is shorter, and stay on that until the procedure and on as low a dose as possible)
The Pregab's though, i dunno how that will work with it all, i'm on 300mg atm daily. Should i try doing the same and gradually empty powder out of each one until i 'feel the slightest WD's' and stay at just a tiny bit above the dose?

I also feel i can't say anything to them either about these things, as i've already had to have this procedure re-arranged (nurse thought i'd drank a whole bottle of water, because i had a bottle with me i was taking small sips of so they had the biggest chance for me getting an IV done, but she took it as me having drank near the whole bottle and whilst waiting on the Dr, had a very dehydrated piss in waiting area, then he came along, brought me to his office and said any water in my system and they couldn't do it due to asphyxia potential, which i completely understand, but i had already been to the toilet, was willing to wait and piss out more if i could, but no, it had to all be re-scheduled then, since when i woke up, i immediately took a few sips of water out of habit/necessity

 

[matt<3ketamine]

Ramble away, friend. It's good to let it out.

Big love man! 100% need's let out sometimes. God damn, do i love this place it's got one of the best communities i've found on the internet.
I always feel like i'm talking into the void when commenting on videos lol so i'd gotten so used to people not being able to read more than a paragraph or 2 WITHOUT them taking their time for me to be told 'i ain't reading all that'/'That's just a wall of text'/TL;dr (when the context is VERY much needed fs)

 

[Perkins : Reborn]

Aye that is a worrying factor: being on benzo's and/or pregab and NOT being able to say to the Dr's because of fear it will reach back up the chain to your GP. Seriously, if GP's would grow some balls and say to people that if they are going into surgery and they MAY be taking another medication that ISN'T prescribed by them, they could just prescribe either a lower dose of it to take for that day OR realize that them not prescribing them in these situations IS LIKELY to cause more potential harm than them NOT prescribing it BECAUSE of your exact reasons (Fear of true medical help in the future because...'labelled addict/drug seeker').

I've a procedure coming up where i'm gonna likely have propofol again and now this has me concerned, as you said, think about what happened to MJ with it + benzos. What would constitute 'too many/much' in your system? Would it be safer to take them the night before and hope the effects have worn off by the time of propofol administration? (diaz's half life is so long, i wonder if it'd be better switching to a shorter lasting benzo few days before, clean out the diaz half life, take, say, lorazepam or something with a shorter half life, the day before and the morning of - take nothing until after the operation and have left the hospital, since the midazolam should keep you good and out of WD's during the procedure?)

Cheers for the heads up on this thinking, your one smart cookie!! Will try knock my dosing down a fair bit (normally 20mg diaz a day suits me grand and try stick to that, so might switch to 15mg for this week, then over to maybe Loraz or something that is shorter, and stay on that until the procedure and on as low a dose as possible)
The Pregab's though, i dunno how that will work with it all, i'm on 300mg atm daily. Should i try doing the same and gradually empty powder out of each one until i 'feel the slightest WD's' and stay at just a tiny bit above the dose?

I also feel i can't say anything to them either about these things, as i've already had to have this procedure re-arranged (nurse thought i'd drank a whole bottle of water, because i had a bottle with me i was taking small sips of so they had the biggest chance for me getting an IV done, but she took it as me having drank near the whole bottle and whilst waiting on the Dr, had a very dehydrated piss in waiting area, then he came along, brought me to his office and said any water in my system and they couldn't do it due to asphyxia potential, which i completely understand, but i had already been to the toilet, was willing to wait and piss out more if i could, but no, it had to all be re-scheduled then, since when i woke up, i immediately took a few sips of water out of habit/necessity

It'd be useful to have @LoginNotSecure here to discuss the above.

 

[Bleaney]

What would constitute 'too many/much' in your system?

Well the whole thing is a very specialist subject, and I tried asking on a specialist anaethetist forum, but I got absolutely ripped to shreds, for even daring to ask the question, or even contemplating being in that situation. Some people just have no ability to understand how others can end up in situations like this. Maybe I could have told them I'm going to do it anyway, whether they help me or not, but that kind of emotional blackmail isn't really my thing.

Although reports of what MJ had taken vary wildly, averaging out the articles that I read would result in MJ having taken10mg of diazepam, 16mg of lorazepam! and 3-4 mg of midazolam. If he did take all of that with propofol he was clearly absolutely fucking nuts, and / or totally lost control of his drug use!

Other reports state that he was taking 40mg of alprazolam per night / per day! But there was no alprazolam detected in his body post portem apparently.

I don't take anything like those kind of total doses, and am extremely restrained in comparison (at least these days, this has not always been the case.) I may well be OK, especially if I could get a really short acting, short half life BZ like etiz, or maybe alprazolam, to take in the days leading up to the surgery, and then 'raw dog' things on the day, they may well give me some midazolam in the hospital anyway. But then I could have much more benzo tolerance than normal, although as I've never had midazolam, maybe even that would not be an issue. It may or may not be OK, if it wasnt such a potentially serious thing to gamble on, with much lower stakes, I would gamble on it being OK with the kind of 'plan' that I'd come up with.

I know that pregabalin boosts and potentiates benzos pretty fucking strongly. A cocktail of benzos + pregabs + propofol could be very dangerous. But obviously that would depend on the total dose of Bzs and pregabs.

Anaesthatists probably have top level training to work all this stuff out, so me just sitting here and guessing isnt really very helpful or reliable. Atm, I think I'd rather take my chances on my hernia not getting worse, until I can quit benzos, rather than risk a fatal O/D, or risk disclosing to the surgeons, and then risk having them tell my GP, which would fuck my life up a lot more than the hernia is doing.

 

[Perkins : Reborn]

Are you sure that the NHS is organised enough to tie everything together?

I've woken up in the back of an ambulance and in the death fuckup ward, and neither appear on my records. Nor does opium paralysing my right hand for weeks.