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Dulling out the day

shannonsensimilla

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 27, 2007
Messages
355
Location
734, Michigan
can you remember
jumping up at the drop of a feather
two thirty, some cold day in November?
can you remember
weighing down both the lines
getting bored and starting fires?

to stay afloat in the anchorous sea
an increasing number of receptors released
how they raced like stock cars through your bloodstream
soul's been left by the side of the road
too many holes for it to go unnoticed
the ink's half dry, can't see all the words
hiding your face, the marks from the burns
every word uttered just that much more absurd

can you remember
staring me square in the face
telling me how much of a waste?
a selfish out for a suburbanized kid

my cake rotted quick
saved the icing for kicks
the last couple years
the thin got thick
still can't decide to persist or quit
 
A nicely constructed verse. I think the meter could use a little work, but thats really just polishing. Overall, I really like it. Please post more.

Sean
 
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