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Drugs And Parents [MEGA-MERGED]

Another "Convincing my Parents to let me do Drugs" Thread

Sorry for posting this oft-repeated topic, but I really would appreciate some intelligent suggestions.

I'll start off by saying that I've had some problems in the past. I had a rough four years of school, because I was depressed, amongst other, more serious, problems. My parents still don't know the full extent of the difficulties I went through in that period. I gave them a pretty rough four years.

Now, however, things are changing. I'm about to finish three courses with good grades, two of them grade twelve courses when I'm supposed to be in grade eleven. I'll have just math to complete, and I'll have finished the year early. I'm intelligent. I'm relatively mature. And yet, my parents will not let me do any drugs.

At first, they wouldn't let me do it in the house. Fair enough, though logically inconsistent (they'd rather me do it out on the streets where it's more hazardous? Oh, I guess that's some of that love they talk about...). Now they won't let me do any drugs at all. My father threatened to kick me out, if he finds out that I did. Why? Because I came home one night and was so stoned that I was having some trouble walking. They didn't like that.

I'm not asking for much here. I'm doing my schoolwork, and very well. I keep my room (mostly) clean. I try not to cause any problems. Meanwhile, I have healthy hobbies, such as reading and writing. And yet, they still won't let me.

I can't afford to get kicked out right now. I wouldn't be able to afford the housing this far north and still have time for school (which is imperative, for my life plan), let alone including the cost of food (prohibitively expensive here). He knows this. That's why he threatened this.

I need to convince them that I'm not slowly killing myself or brain damaging myself. That I can use psychoactives and still function as a health and intelligent human being. That they have had only positives for me (without them, I never would have been able to become as happy as I am now. Without drugs, I never could have gained a social life. I hadn't had one until this year.).

But no, my parents will not think rationally about this. They will not consider my side.

And why? "Because we worry about you."

Bullshit. Absolute bullshit. If you really worried about me, you'd let me safely indulge in psychoactives in my room at home, rather than force me to either not do something I enjoy (something that saved me from suicide) or move out.

I don't really know how to fully articulate my thoughts right now. I'm cold, frostbitten, pissed off, frustrated, and pretty fucking depressed. Almost as bad as eight months ago, when I very nearly killed myself.

I guess this is mostly a rant. But please, if you have any suggestions or tips, post them. I need all the help I can get.
 
hmm, back when i was in highschool i was allowed to smoke so long as i didnt leave it lying around my room and maintained good grades. This situation came about because i level headidly said to them "look, i enjoy getting high, im going to continue doing so for the forseeable future, we need to work out some criteria"
Not knowing your background i cant give any specific advice, but whatever you do dont sound pretentious or get into the alcohol kills more people type bullshit.
they are you parents, its their job to bring you up with good morals and a good education, your getting busted for possesion would be in their eyes you amounting to nothing. You should respect their wished as best you can, if they wont bend on the zero tolerance thing then either do it quitely behind their backs, or stop.
if your dads mind is set then thats it, respect it.

ofcourse if your dads a raging alcoholic then by all means smoke away.
 
Druidus said:
Sorry for posting this oft-repeated topic, but I really would appreciate some intelligent suggestions.

I'll start off by saying that I've had some problems in the past. I had a rough four years of school, because I was depressed, amongst other, more serious, problems. My parents still don't know the full extent of the difficulties I went through in that period. I gave them a pretty rough four years.

Now, however, things are changing. I'm about to finish three courses with good grades, two of them grade twelve courses when I'm supposed to be in grade eleven. I'll have just math to complete, and I'll have finished the year early. I'm intelligent. I'm relatively mature. And yet, my parents will not let me do any drugs.

At first, they wouldn't let me do it in the house. Fair enough, though logically inconsistent (they'd rather me do it out on the streets where it's more hazardous? Oh, I guess that's some of that love they talk about...). Now they won't let me do any drugs at all. My father threatened to kick me out, if he finds out that I did. Why? Because I came home one night and was so stoned that I was having some trouble walking. They didn't like that.

I'm not asking for much here. I'm doing my schoolwork, and very well. I keep my room (mostly) clean. I try not to cause any problems. Meanwhile, I have healthy hobbies, such as reading and writing. And yet, they still won't let me.

I can't afford to get kicked out right now. I wouldn't be able to afford the housing this far north and still have time for school (which is imperative, for my life plan), let alone including the cost of food (prohibitively expensive here). He knows this. That's why he threatened this.

I need to convince them that I'm not slowly killing myself or brain damaging myself. That I can use psychoactives and still function as a health and intelligent human being. That they have had only positives for me (without them, I never would have been able to become as happy as I am now. Without drugs, I never could have gained a social life. I hadn't had one until this year.).

But no, my parents will not think rationally about this. They will not consider my side.

And why? "Because we worry about you."

Bullshit. Absolute bullshit. If you really worried about me, you'd let me safely indulge in psychoactives in my room at home, rather than force me to either not do something I enjoy (something that saved me from suicide) or move out.

I don't really know how to fully articulate my thoughts right now. I'm cold, frostbitten, pissed off, frustrated, and pretty fucking depressed. Almost as bad as eight months ago, when I very nearly killed myself.

I guess this is mostly a rant. But please, if you have any suggestions or tips, post them. I need all the help I can get.
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its a pipe dream man. why should your parents let you do drugs? that wouldnt be responsible of them at all. Just because you do what every kid SHOULD do in school, you think you should be blessed with the ability to do drugs with the approval of your parents? its unreal. At first i thought you were a college kid, but youre in high school, and it makes sense that you want this because EVERY high school kid dreams of their parents being cool with drug usage.

"im not asking for much here". Yes you are. Youre asking for the priveledge of being able to do something that only (i know this is hypocritcal, but its a good point) adults should be able to do. The reason they wont let you do it is because you got a life ahead of you that you havnt even started yet, and why fuck something up before you even have it? Believe it or not, your parents actually do want good things for you and are actually looking out for your best interests. I know youre gonna say "but im responsible, i wont fuck it up." Honestly, i dont believe that for a second. Its so easy to fuck up with drugs that you cant dismiss the possibility of it happening because there is a good chance that you will fuck it up.

Also, i dont get how you think that if they worried about you, they would let you safely indulge in psychedelics. Thats the complete opposite of worrying about you. That would give them more to worry about. If they knew you werent doing drugs, that would give them less to worry about and thats ultimatley what parents want.

Go ahead and try to convince your parents to let you do this. But dont expect it. You make it seem like you deserve it and that your parents are commiting a crime against you by not letting you. Its a dream that everyone of us drug users had in high school. Its true some people got it, but consider them lucky. Real fuckin lucky.
 
a similar topic and kind of inter-related is this. Getting your parents to get stoned, if they havent already. like volunteer to make the brownies, jk.
but ifforget is right, its way too easy to fuck up with drugs. did i forget to mention i just got out of jail on a drugs related charge? but yeah my parents let me smoke :D
 
I'm sorry guys, I was in a piss-poor mood when I posted that. I know that it's unrealistic of me to hope for this, and perhaps even selfish of me.

I love my parents, and I know they love me. I know that I have a long way to go before I'm as experienced or as wise as them. I know that they only hold my best interests - as they see them, in mind.

To clarify, I'm not hoping to do anything more than cannabis and DXM. Even those I wouldn't do IN the house, I'd do it in my car and then quietly go to my room for the trip. I wouldn't shove it in their face or anything. I'd be as discreet as possible.

As for the dangers of fucking up or overdosing on drugs, yes, that's a possibility. Not with cannabis, but with DXM, I suppose. However, I never buy anywhere near enough to even have a remote possibility of overdosing. And I keep strict controls on how often I use it. The possibility of overdose is negligible.

By fucking up, do you mean negative effects arising down the road? I worry about the possibility of this too. However, I hold faith in my ability to stop using drugs if they negatively effect me.

I will stop using drugs if I must. I value my relationship with them (specifically my father) too much to do otherwise. BUt I can still dream.
 
all I can say is good luck. these past years I've had a helluva time trying to get my mom to go out for a night of shooting heroin and polishing off a bottle of Grey Goose ;)
 
I found a list of guidelines for responsible drug usage that might help me explain my case:

* Understanding and educating oneself on the effects and legality of the drug being consumed
* Weighing accurate dosages and taking other precautions to reduce the risk of overdose
* Taking the time to chemically test all drugs being consumed to determine purity and strength
* Not driving, operating heavy machinery, or otherwise being directly or indirectly responsible for the safety or care of another person while intoxicated
* Not making irreversible or otherwise important decisions while under the influence
* Having a trip sitter when taking a drug with which one is not familiar
* Being honest with others about drug use
* Not attempting to trick or persuade anyone to use a drug they are not willing to use
* Not allowing drug use to overshadow other aspects of one's life
* Using drugs only when appropriate or for special occasions
* Being morally conscious of the source of their drugs

There's even an oath for it:

* I understand the effects of all recreational drugs I take, to the best of my ability. I shall research the neurochemical, psychological, physiological, spirituality effects, the legal issues surrounding the drug and its use.
* When taking a drug I am inexperienced with, I shall begin with the lowest dose suggested to be psychoactive by the aforementioned research before progressing to higher dosages. I will measure the drug carefully, with an accurate scale.
* If it is possible that the drug may contain harmful adulterants or in fact be a different drug altogether, I shall have the drug chemically analyzed for purity and content.
* I will learn the overdose limits for my own body weight and adjust them for any possible synergistic effects due to diet, prescription or other drugs. I will also adjust for dangerous side effects and my own health condition. After calculating my personal limit, I will stay under 75% of this limit, to minimize risk.
* While under the effects of a drug, I shall not take physical risks such as driving, climbing, swimming, or any other physical activity in which my actions may cause harm to myself or others.
* When first using a drug I am inexperienced with, I shall take it in the company of an experienced user, also known as a spotter. The spotter will remain sober during this experience, and will also have fully researched the drug.
* I shall not attempt to sway, force, trick, or otherwise coerce another person to take any drug; rather, I shall discuss previous drug experiences and research frankly and honestly, allowing all people to make their own personal decisions about drug use.
* I shall defend the rights of others to make educated, responsible decisions about drug use. I shall not support any person or movement that attempts to remove or abridge said rights.
* I shall not allow my drug use to overshadow or disrupt the other important aspects of my life, including social interaction, employment or even other personal pursuits.
* I will also take responsibility for the drug use of friends and relatives, if their drug use becomes dangerous to their health or personal relationships.

* I understand the effects of habituation, and therefore I shall exercise caution and significantly reduce the quantity of any familiar drug I use when taking the drug in a new and different environment for the first time.
* As a drug consumer, I will embrace responsible drug production and distribution methods, such as growing or pharming your own, and shun suppliers who use violence when not necessary for their self-defense.


I swear this with the hope of creating a society in which safe, responsible drug use is a personal decision, not a criminal offense.

Should I show these criteria to them or would it not help? I'm willing to abide by them all, and, for the most part, I already do.
 
lost cause in my opinion. if i was a parent i wouldnt want my kids doing drugs either.

all those guidelines and oaths get thrown out the window when certain drugs and habits come into play. if all you are gona do is smoke pot, then its not so much a big deal, but get a real monkey on your back and theres no easy salvation and those rules dont mean jack shit.
 
^ thats what i was thinking. he just seems so dead set on it that i wasnt even going to bother making a case against it.
 
Not only is it unrealistic, but provocative. There's no point in convincing your parents to "let" you do drugs. They can't stop you from getting high. Bringing the subject up is just going to create conflict, and the more you push it the worse you're going to make for yourself and your relationship with your parents. Just smoke outside, it's not that big a deal. Out of sight, out of mind.
 
well personally i remember having to discuss and debate and compromise and promise so many things to my parents to let me go out n party n stuff when i was a teenager. yeah i made the whole thing about how i wouldnt do drugs, how im smarter than that etc etc. and look where i am now. shit changes. good intentions dont cut it. just a little here and a little more there and u find urself in the place where you promised years ago you wouldnt be. sigh.
 
Why is it that doing drugs is automatically a bad thing. In my sober times, I've attempted suicide and am habitually depressed. With drugs I'm happy, active and social. Why is it that most parents prefer to have a suicidal "clean" child as opposed to a "drug-using" happy child? If a child kills himself, they won't have anyone left to "worry" about.

I hate that "worry about you" bullshit. When I'm high, there are no worries needed for me. When I'm living clean, I lay on the couch depressed, and you better call suicide watch
 
Not only is it unrealistic, but provocative. There's no point in convincing your parents to "let" you do drugs. They can't stop you from getting high. Bringing the subject up is just going to create conflict, and the more you push it the worse you're going to make for yourself and your relationship with your parents. Just smoke outside, it's not that big a deal. Out of sight, out of mind.
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Can't even just smoke outside or in my car. He said he'd kick me out for that too. He wants me to stop doing any drugs, any time, anywhere.

:(

It kind of sucks, because they've made me a much more capable and healthy person.
 
drug use is only happy and good while its controlled. and controlled drug use is a tough one. depends what drug and your personality. theres been a post ive read around here about how there are never ever any 'occasional' and 'controlled' use of heroin/opiates. its just a matter of time (given that you have the sources etc).
 
gomer1985 said:
Why is it that doing drugs is automatically a bad thing. In my sober times, I've attempted suicide and am habitually depressed. With drugs I'm happy, active and social. Why is it that most parents prefer to have a suicidal "clean" child as opposed to a "drug-using" happy child? If a child kills himself, they won't have anyone left to "worry" about.

I hate that "worry about you" bullshit. When I'm high, there are no worries needed for me. When I'm living clean, I lay on the couch depressed, and you better call suicide watch
Click to expand...

because, usually no matter what, that drug-using happy child turns into something that is definitley not happy. Maybe not suicidal, but not happy by any means. And a clean depressed/suicidal child is actually easier to help than a drug addicted one.
 
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well my parents were always against me smoking pot (im not even going to mention what they think about me using psychedelics and such). but anyway just recently i was arrested for possession of a large amount of marijuana (that was not mine) and am currently going through some tough shit (possible jail time).
After this incident my parents realized that just because i smoke pot it doesnt mean that im a criminal or doing anything wrong. They realized that it is our govt that is wrong in this case.
Ever since this incident they have been encouraging me to move out to CA and live with them where i can get a prescription for pot and smoke it legally.
they have finally understood that smoking pot is not the evil that our govt makes it out to be.

Also i think they may be okay with it now because i recent;y turned 21 and am able to make decisions for myself without having them interfere.

i dont really know what to suggest to u though. either be really sneaky, try to prove your poiint to them, or wait till u move out.
 
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