TDS Don't know what to do... Am I sick?


Probably because you're low priority/low risk. It is EXTREMELY unlikely that it is cancer.

I'll fall over if I have to say that again. But the odds are so stupid low it is silly to worry. You should be more fucking worried about dying the next time you're in a car. Far more likely than you having fucking cancer, even with that symptom.

Can't you pay privately and get one faster or is it too much?


I had a colonoscopy/endoscopy with a few weeks later for rectal bleeding, because at my age it was EXTREMELY unlikely that I had colon cancer. And I had badass insurance (it was free).

Guess what? Did I have colon cancer, or just a minor inflammation of a small part of my rectal wall?

What do you think? This was two years ago.


It was the latter. Got a 5 boxes of samples I still haven't gone through.

Still occasionally bleeds (like twice a year), I don't even take the Lialda (the samples I mentioned, an anti-inflammatory), because it only occurs once and stops. Odd eh?
 
Probably because you're low priority/low risk. It is EXTREMELY unlikely that it is cancer.

I'll fall over if I have to say that again. But the odds are so stupid low it is silly to worry. You should be more fucking worried about dying the next time you're in a car. Far more likely than you having fucking cancer, even with that symptom.

Can't you pay privately and get one faster or is it too much?


I had a colonoscopy/endoscopy with a few weeks later for rectal bleeding, because at my age it was EXTREMELY unlikely that I had colon cancer. And I had badass insurance (it was free).

Guess what? Did I have colon cancer, or just a minor inflammation of a small part of my rectal wall?

What do you think? This was two years ago.


It was the latter. Got a 5 boxes of samples I still haven't gone through.

Still occasionally bleeds (like twice a year), I don't even take the Lialda (the samples I mentioned, an anti-inflammatory), because it only occurs once and stops. Odd eh?

My girlfriend mentioned going private. I'd really like to not do that. First of all, I'm on social benefits and dead broke most of the time, second I've already borrowed more than 20 000 off my parents. And lastly, I hate private clinics. It's like they feel free to be rude and obnoxious because they get paid so much. Twice I've gone to private clinics and the first time the doctor laughed at me when I told him my symptoms and the second time the nurse sniggered when I dropped my pants. Swear to God.

I'll talk to my doc if I can.
How many people die while waiting for tests?
My doc said it was impossible to diagnose based on ultrasounds, so they have NO way of knowing how serious it is.

OK. OK. Let's say it's not cancer. Sure, it could happen. But I would like to know. Soon.
Imagine how long this thread will be. Imagine three months of increased worrying? I'll go insane by January.

Merry Christmas, right? I'll be a bundle of joy at Christmas day.
A laugh and a half.
Jesus wept.
 
My girlfriend mentioned going private. I'd really like to not do that. First of all, I'm on social benefits and dead broke most of the time, second I've already borrowed more than 20 000 off my parents. And lastly, I hate private clinics. It's like they feel free to be rude and obnoxious because they get paid so much. Twice I've gone to private clinics and the first time the doctor laughed at me when I told him my symptoms and the second time the nurse sniggered when I dropped my pants. Swear to God.

I'll talk to my doc if I can.
How many people die while waiting for tests?
My doc said it was impossible to diagnose based on ultrasounds, so they have NO way of knowing how serious it is.

OK. OK. Let's say it's not cancer. Sure, it could happen. But I would like to know. Soon.
Imagine how long this thread will be. Imagine three months of increased worrying? I'll go insane by January.

Merry Christmas, right? I'll be a bundle of joy at Christmas day.
A laugh and a half.
Jesus wept.

Yeah forget the clinic route.
Maybe there are blood markers that could be tested for FAR cheaper that mark testicular cancer? My only suggestion by talking to your doc about your concerns and the time.

I know the long wait sucks man, not knowing, but you are a fucking smart guy.

You know that you worrying changes NOTHING.

Besides what I mentioned, (trying to change the time until you can get a colonoscopy ) this is out of your hands. You have to have to submit to the reality that it is extremely unlikely that you have something seriously wrong with you.
 
This kinda seems like one of those things that isn't in your control. By this I just mean that worrying will not make a bit of difference for the outcome of this one. I understand your desire to know but I would try and not let the anxiety of this trouble you so much.
 
Today I had a meeting with my shrink, my doc (gp) and my social security caseworker, regarding my future viz employment and income. My shrink agreed 3 months is a bad idea in terms of my worrying and negative thought pattern (with the added pressure of my mother being suicidal these days too).

The doc told me to call the hospital, explain the situation and try to smooth-talk them into giving me a call whenever someone cancels and a free slot comes up.

Smooth talkin' ain't my speciality, see. So we'll see what I can do.
However, should any new symptoms arrive I should call the doc and he would re-schedule the appointment to sooner. I'm tempted to fake a new symptom related to cancer just to get it done - but I'm a lousy lier and it should would be a laugh and half if I fake a cancer symptom only to get it for realz afterwards.

Though, the psycho-somatic symptoms are coming more and more. They tend to come when I'm stressed and go away whenever my mind is occupied on other less physical worries and woes.

Three months is a long while to simmer my worry. It'll fester.
 
I'm sorry. I'm freaking out again.
Loldrugz... where are you?

You say it's unlikely to be cancer. But I'm at the perfect age for testicular cancer. And how come I can't get it? The logic doesn't work. That's unlikely doesn't mean it never happens. It just means it happens to some. And I could be that some(one). Why not?

This has always been a pet peeve of mine. OK, it's unlikely to be hit by lightning, unlikely to win the lottery. Yes. But SOMEONE has to be hit, someone has to win. And for THAT person the odds don't matter. Even if it happens to one out of 50 million people, you could be that one. And then the odds don't work.
If it happens, it happens.
The odds dont mean you are immune or exempt. If all my friends had cancer, all my family, then OK, it's statistically unlikely (though biologically not so in case of family), but I know NO ONE who has had cancer. Ipso facto, it has to be me. Lightning has to strike sometimes.

To say it's "unlikely" is no guarantee. In fact, it' sort of inane. It doesn't make sense. I AM at the right age, and therefore just a likely victim as the millions of other men my age.

I had some pain today. A few minutes then it passed. Enough to start a major panic attack. Couldn't breathe. It's passed now, and the attack is replaced by a sort of hollow, empty, fear filled depression that is mirrored by the grey weather and drizzle of rain.

How am I supposed to do anything right now? How am I supposed to be productive?
I was already depressed and useless, now more so.
I could barely survive as it was.
 
I'm sorry. I'm freaking out again.
Loldrugz... where are you?

You say it's unlikely to be cancer. But I'm at the perfect age for testicular cancer. And how come I can't get it? The logic doesn't work. That's unlikely doesn't mean it never happens. It just means it happens to some. And I could be that some(one). Why not?

Even if it happens to one out of 50 million people, you could be that one. And then the odds don't work.
If it happens, it happens.
The odds dont mean you are immune or exempt. If all my friends had cancer, all my family, then OK, it's statistically unlikely (though biologically not so in case of family), but I know NO ONE who has had cancer. Ipso facto, it has to be me. Lightning has to strike sometimes.

To say it's "unlikely" is no guarantee. In fact, it' sort of inane. It doesn't make sense. I AM at the right age, and therefore just a likely victim as the millions of other men my age.

I had some pain today. A few minutes then it passed. Enough to start a major panic attack. Couldn't breathe. It's passed now, and the attack is replaced by a sort of hollow, empty, fear filled depression that is mirrored by the grey weather and drizzle of rain.

How am I supposed to do anything right now? How am I supposed to be productive?
I was already depressed and useless, now more so.
I could barely survive as it was.

"You say it's unlikely to be cancer. But I'm at the perfect age for testicular cancer. And how come I can't get it? "
These statements are not inclusive of one another. Unlikely does not mean can't. I could have a few cells that sitting right in my testicle now that just haven't multiplied enough to cause symptoms.

"This has always been a pet peeve of mine. OK, it's unlikely to be hit by lightning, unlikely to win the lottery. Yes. But SOMEONE has to be hit, someone has to win. And for THAT person the odds don't matter"

Yeah man, welcome to life. It's unpredictable, and only recently have we been able to counter disease and cancer. Especially testicular cancer, especially in younger non-sickly males.


True, you are at the perfect age for testicular (not prostate) cancer. So what, so am I, and if it hurts when I pee for a bit, I don't all of the sudden have a panic attack.



You'd be lucky to have gotten it over many other types which can occur at your age , since it has such a low mortality rate, pancreas/lungs.
"Testicular cancer is one of the most curable forms of cancer. According to the National Cancer Institute, the 5-year relative survival rate for all men with this cancer is 95%. If the cancer hasn't spread outside the testicle, the 5-year relative survival rate is 99%. Even if the cancer has spread to nearby lymph nodes, the rate is 96%. If it has spread to organs or lymph nodes away from the tumor, the 5-year relative survival rate is around 72%." From cancer.org (http://www.cancer.org/cancer/testicularcancer/overviewguide/testicular-cancer-overview-survival-rates).

That's fucking crazy. There are plenty of nastier things that are communicable that you could get. Botulism's mortality rate (you can get from eating food) "The World Health Organization (WHO) reports that the current mortality rate is 5% (type B) to 10% (type A). Other sources report that, in the U.S., the overall mortality rate is about 7.5%, but the mortality rate among adults over 60 is 30%."

Far more deadly, that's the mortality for a single infection.

1-100 chance if you have it you die, and I bet that one person is already unhealthy and old.

My point is that those stats together with the first i posted should be comforting man. Almost no one dies from it, especially not at your age.

You're probably doing more damage to your heart stressing out constantly.

There's not much more to be said that can comfort you. No one here can promise you DON'T have it (unless some one here is an oncologist and radiologist and has a handy MRI). Maybe talking to your doctor about the anxiety it is causing you could help?
 
Maybe t-cancer IS curable, but that's if it's caught early, which it isn't, or will be, in three months time...
I mean, jesus. This is my life - my life that for ONCE (okay, for once in six years) - actually means something to me. I'm freaking out because I _might_ have it. Believe me, if I do, then I'll freak out on a more profound level.
I have a panic attack my doc used the c-word. He actually "went there". What else could it be?

Am I supposed to just go on living my life? To make plans for a future I might not have?

Look, I understand. When my father had his cancer scare, I barely thought about it. He would call me in the middle of the night crying, and I told him to relax and wait for the test.
It's different when it's someone else. You can play loose and fast with someone else's life. Or pretend to care, or whatever.
But this is it for me.
We're not talking losing a leg or the ability to walk.
We're talking the end of consciousness in any meaningful sense of the word.
Which... ok, I mean, we don't - or probably don't - have any experience of death, so it'll just "be over", but right here and now, and until the last stage of the sickness, I'll suffer. I'll see everything pass away.
Dying of cancer IS like seeing all your loved ones die at once... Except THEY get to live on. They get to enjoy life.
GOD, I wanna enjoy life and live till I'm old too.
Please...
Please...
I need to know and I need to not have it :(
 
I just read about someone who died of gastric cancer three months after the diagnosis... Three months. I'll be dead by Christmas day.
 
I just read about someone who died of gastric cancer three months after the diagnosis... Three months. I'll be dead by Christmas day.

You probably will be, and it will be from a infection of the stomach ulcers going sceptic which was caused by you stressing out and absolutely nothing else. You ever think that if you thought more positively, that if your biggest fear came true it would actually decrease mortality? I'm not meaning to make you worry about worrying. Do you have a specific religion you follow and believe(I know you mentioned understanding Eastern Philosophy... but there are Christians who do as well...)
 
Yeah, I worry. "That's my religion. Har-har"
Like I've written, I genuinely believe worrying helps. Because I know whenever I've been happy it's come back and bitten me in the ass. I was for once in my life, and that's the day my girlfriend dumped me... Besides, if I worry, then it won't be so bad when it happens. It wont surprise me.

Religion... I've spend the last three years studying it. Buddhism, Hinduism, Sufism, Pantheism, Mormonism, all kinds. Looking for meaning. Trying to understand. Have some purpose in life. But I was never able to believe. Even though I wanted to. I thought I believed, but I didn't. I believed on a cerebral level, but that's not faith. Real faith is irrational. It's beyond logic. You believe despite...
I still believe in non-duality, that all is One and that we are all one inseparable part of Godhead. That we forget because of ignorance. But there is only One thing.
But what comfort is that? What do you do with that?
Believing, cerebrally, that reality is maya (an illusion), just a projection - that sometimes has flaws, like deja vu, synchronicity, precognition, etc - but is always too solid to be understood for what it is: Just a big lie.

But now... facing death, I feel so stupid... I LOVE this big lie, I love life because of it's imperfections.Everything that's fucked up is beautiful and supreme. It's a sin, but I love the big ego, the big fake, the clinging.

(Been getting more frequent pains in my prostate. I've had those for six years - had it checked, nothing wrong - but it's more often now. Gonna call my doc tomorrow, tell him there is a new symptom, that should hurry the biopsy along.)
 
So, talked to my doc today. Told a half-truth about a new symptom, and he said he'd get on it, make sure I got a biopsy, an appointment, before Christmas.

Now the question is: Will this be the best christmas ever - spent in exultation and 'there but for the grace of God go I'-spirit, or will it be my worst, and possibly last, Christmas?
 
Of course, my father mentioned cancer spreading to the brain, and now I have 24/7 headaches... I need to either get diagnosed with cancer or told I don't have it, or given something that limits the symptoms to reality- not to my imagination.
 
Hi AnrBjotk, a lot of the posters on this thread has already told you to calm down but I would just to share my story.

About a couple of years back I was experiencing pain on my upper stomach. This became more apparent when I went for a run with my coworker, the pain was unbearable after and specially at night. It felt like someone was twisting my insides and even zantac could not alleviate the symptom.

I went to the doctor and told him what I am experiencing and he asked more questions etc and told me that if the pain does not go away within a week to come back to him and he will do more testing etc (blood tests, gastroentorologist appointments). I came back after a week because the pain did not go away and I was finding it hard to sleep.

I was freaking out, I kept reading more information online about the possibility that I might have cancer and that the doctors have overlooked this. I became hypochondriac, freaking out every time I felt something painful in my stomach. There came a point where I would cry at work thinking about this all the time, scared that the cancer has spread in my entire stomach so when I went to the doctor again, I forced him to get me an appointment with a Gastroentorologist because I wanted to make sure that he is not missing anything that might fire back on his ass later on. I did an ultrasound and it turned out that I had gallstones. The doctor said that the gall stones were inactive and that the pains I was experiencing are not related to the gallstones pain so I was given a chance to get a colonoscopy done and they found nothing.

What I wanted to tell you is that the mind is a powerful thing, if you are going to freak out all the time about the symptoms, going to look on the internet about possibilities of sickness, the more you will experience symptoms. This is just from my experience so I hope you take this into consideration that no matter what you do and no matter how much you worry, you will not know the answers until the doctor gives you the results.
 
Thanks again for all posts.
Still no news, but waiting for new date for biopsy.
Truth be told... I've started forgetting about it. When I forget, no pain.
But still... that's no proof.
And maybe I'll be punished for forgetting.
I wanna forget. Of course I do. But I don't think I should.
I still worry. I get pangs of shear terror.
Like today.

But it's like this... I'm looking forward to going home for christmas. I'm looking forward to the holidays. Broke or no broke. It'll be nice.
So I wanna forget. With my miserable, fucked-up, lonely, drug-addled, sad and pathetic life, I need to feel good about this. I need peace and I need something to look forward to.
I'm still in limbo.
This can go either way, no matter what youse guys say. And that's scary.
I want so bad, more than anything ever before, this to be nothing. I wanna tell the story of "the time I thought I had cancer". Not, "the time I got diagnosed", or "the day I was told I had two months to live". That's natural.
 
OK. I guess this thread is dead. Then again, it's all about death.

Still no new appointment. Still waiting for a letter.
It's annoying, because the doc said before christmas, but by this time, "before christmas" has to be like the day before christmas eve. Which means I wont be able to travel home to my folks at the 15th as planned...
But that's the least of my worries.

I think maybe the other testicle is a bit swollen now... I told the doc, and he said he'd pass it on.
But STILL no letter... Overcrowded hospitals... it's a tragedy.

Another thing:
This thread started with the problem that I felt I had to use the bathroom when I didn't.
That problem still arises now and again.
It happens every time I'm at class or anywhere where it's harder to go to the bathroom. I sit there, feeling like I'm about to piss myself.

Are there any medications for that? I saw on the show "Boss" that the main character got some pills that made urination less frequent... Could I ask for that? Or do I just have to suffer and hope it passes?
 
Hey im 27 and i also have the same problem i feel like i know exactly when it started.

Im pretty sure it started when i was away and didnt see my gf for like a month and when i saw her we had sex quite a few times within a couple hours and i feel like thats when it started.

I had bin with her for years so i know its not a std i also have got tested for all std and a few weeks ago i went to a urologist and did all the tests and evreything is fine with me.

I was happy and dissapointed with that cuz there is no solution for my problem and it is not getting any better or worse.

The doc said last thing to do is to put a camera in me thru my jewels and i dont think i can do that so i guess i am stuck wit this for now.

He gave me some kind of medicine that is similar to flomax but i dont think it does much since i dont have a enlarged prostate but maybe u can try that or another med i tried was oxybutin also didnt help.

Good luck and im pretty sure and feel comfertable saying that u do not have symptoms of cancer.
 
Ok.
My doc calls me earlier today. He's finally spoken to the hospital (having "forgotten" it two days). He tells me to get straight to the hospital first thing tomorrow. The urologist there said I should have been there weeks ago...
So tomorrow's the day. The day I find out something at least.
With my luck the results wont come right away. But God I hope so. I need to know.

I'm close to vomiting right now. This is it.
All or nothing.
 
I'M FREE!!!
I literally danced the way home and can't stop grinning. This is better than the best H mainlined.

NOT cancer. NOT a cyst. NOT a tumor. Just a varicose vein running through my testi. Who'da thunk it?
Bad news: nothing they can do about that. It'll be sore and painful until I pop my clogs. (Which is OK because I have a serious problem with people touching my balls anyway - now I have an excuse)

I know I'll crash anytime soon. This high is temporary, I know. Hell, I might even pull a Woody Allen and get depressed after a while. But right now, I'm as high as a kite.

Loldrugz, I could kiss you. Right on the anus, man.

YEAH!!!
 
^ Im extremely happy for you, I know how it felt to be worrying so much and stressing if everything is going to be ok or not. Now you are free of all worries so make the most of your life and start living healthy. :) <3<3
 
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