Do You Consider Yourself a User, an Abuser or an Addict?

[Spackeradder]

TITLE IS MEANT TO SAY "DO YOU CONSIDER"

Hi there. Long time lurker, first time thread startererer.

I've been using drugs since I was 16, and abusing since I was 18. I am now 21. I've done a fairly wide range of substances, going through difference phases and changing my DOC every few months ...at this point, I'm extremely partial to meth and oxycodone, and also popping benzos fairly regularly to help when I crash or run out of cash.

In the last 3 years, there have been two one-month periods of sobriety (I moved location both times, y'see). Rest of the time I've been high at least 5-6 days of the week. To to drugs, I have fucked up at university twice over.

My psych assessment sheet (written up when I was 18, I think) says I am a "polysubstance abuser". My best friend says I am, and have been for at least a year now, a drug addict in denial.

Today I am sober. My skin feels clammy and looks pale, I can feel drops of sweat constantly crawling down my body, all I've thought about is drugs, my stomach feels like it has sealed up shut, and we won't even go into what my bowels are doing. This is an old dance I am familiar with... tomorrow, if I remain sober, I will start to feel nauseous and weakened, and spend most of the day on the couch, unable to sleep or eat well. And I'll bloody well forget to shower, too.

Yet I still can't make the mental leap from the label of abuser to addict. I still consider myself an abuser -- someone who simply has a very strong 'taste' for a wide variety of substances.

I'm curious as to what other Australian bluelighters considers themselves to be. Are you a user, abuser, or addict? Making the transition from one to another? Where do you draw the line between abuse and addiction?

I'm sorry if this subject has been covered before, a quick search didn't produce anything.

 

[Black Rabbit of Inle]

I'm a poly-abuser. I don't get cravings/withdrawals when I go 1-2 months sober. I also rarely have day/week long binges anymore and drug use has become a benefit of working hard (i can afford something special every now and again without blowing the budget)

 

[footscrazy]

Interesting thread. I changed the name of the title to what you intended it to be too

I think the terms are pretty subjective - different people interpret them differently. Also, I think the terms define different things, and aren't particular states of being that one is either in or not, or can transition from to a different one. To me, being an 'addict' signifies a dependence, either physically or mentally, on a substance, whereas 'abuser' signifies the way someone uses drugs. I would consider an abuser as someone who uses recklessly - who uses past the point where negative consequences become apparent, and values getting high other other concerns. I don't consider 'addict' and 'abuser' mutually exclusive.

What are your definitions of a user, abuser and addict, Spackeradder?

I reckon I'd call myself all three. I am physically addicted, and I have a strong psychological dependence on some drugs. I definitely abuse drugs, too.

 

[deidara]

I am most defnitly an addict. I knew from the first minute I got high that drugs were the love of my life. They are my reason for living and I love all off them, my favorite being heroin. When I am not using drugs, I feel like something is missing. I being that being "addicted" is just something that the individual is born with, and had to find ways to either cope with it or fight against it. I envy people who can smoke pot and take hallucinogens recreationally.

 

[Nozphexezora]

TITLE IS MEANT TO SAY "DO YOU CONSIDER"

Hi there. Long time lurker, first time thread startererer.

I've been using drugs since I was 16, and abusing since I was 18. I am now 21. I've done a fairly wide range of substances, going through difference phases and changing my DOC every few months ...at this point, I'm extremely partial to meth and oxycodone, and also popping benzos fairly regularly to help when I crash or run out of cash.

In the last 3 years, there have been two one-month periods of sobriety (I moved location both times, y'see). Rest of the time I've been high at least 5-6 days of the week. To to drugs, I have fucked up at university twice over.

My psych assessment sheet (written up when I was 18, I think) says I am a "polysubstance abuser". My best friend says I am, and have been for at least a year now, a drug addict in denial.

Today I am sober. My skin feels clammy and looks pale, I can feel drops of sweat constantly crawling down my body, all I've thought about is drugs, my stomach feels like it has sealed up shut, and we won't even go into what my bowels are doing. This is an old dance I am familiar with... tomorrow, if I remain sober, I will start to feel nauseous and weakened, and spend most of the day on the couch, unable to sleep or eat well. And I'll bloody well forget to shower, too.

Yet I still can't make the mental leap from the label of abuser to addict. I still consider myself an abuser -- someone who simply has a very strong 'taste' for a wide variety of substances.

I'm curious as to what other Australian bluelighters considers themselves to be. Are you a user, abuser, or addict? Making the transition from one to another? Where do you draw the line between abuse and addiction?

I'm sorry if this subject has been covered before, a quick search didn't produce anything.

I use them and I abuse them and I'm addicted to them.

 

[opi8]

Yeah

 

[Spackeradder]

I think the terms are pretty subjective - different people interpret them differently. Also, I think the terms define different things, and aren't particular states of being that one is either in or not, or can transition from to a different one. To me, being an 'addict' signifies a dependence, either physically or mentally, on a substance, whereas 'abuser' signifies the way someone uses drugs. I would consider an abuser as someone who uses recklessly - who uses past the point where negative consequences become apparent, and values getting high other other concerns. I don't consider 'addict' and 'abuser' mutually exclusive.

What are your definitions of a user, abuser and addict, Spackeradder?

Very interesting way to look at it, Footscrazy. You're onto it. I was running with very simple definitions -- a user smokes a bit of shard on the weekends, an abuser goes on a 2-3 day meth binge, and an addict tweaks every single day... but you've got me thinking that I was kind of clinging to these definitions because it keeps me firmly in the 'abuser' category and not 'addict.' It is very easy to say you do not have much of a problem when you're surrounded by people who shoot up daily, easy to justify that because you do not use with quite the same frequency, you must not have any real issues.

I envy people who can smoke pot and take hallucinogens recreationally.

Amen. I have one good friend who's mostly the sober type. Drinks a bit at parties, y'know? I introduced him to bud about a year ago now, and since then, every time we have a session, I am left GOBSMACKED at the way he'll rip two or three cones then happily claim to "be done". I'll smoke the other 15 cones to myself and still be sitting there bitching about not being high enough.

Different strokes, I guess.

 

[AFA]

Yeah

^Bahahahahahahahaha

+1

 

[rickolasnice]

All 3, infortunately..

 

[Nozphexezora]

To be honest, I don't know how people can not use opiates once a day and still manage. When I was 16 or so I used to do codeine every month or so, but that was when I was extracting the shitty 15 nurofen+ packs and getting jackshit from it. I distinctly remember on Christmas eve, 2011(?), I took codeine and did an excellent extraction. It was probably the first time I actually felt a nod, and something clicked inside me and before I knew it I was taking it daily. Even when I have relapses, I always think I can get away with just one, but I would always go back to doing it every day or twice a day. At the moment though I'm just taking it steady and doing it once a day. I never got addicted to anything else but cigarettes, and even then cigarettes is just something I do after an opiate. With weed I would buy a bag, some of it and then just either throw the rest in the bin or give it away.

I did, however, do dxm a fair bit when I was a angsty teenager, but I stopped that because it was fucking with my head too badly and it stunted my learning for a few months in school. DXM literally does nothing, or next to nothing, to me any more anyway. A few months ago I tried 300-400mg and it did absolutely jackshit.

 

[Halif]

Interesting discussion - particularly this distinction...

I would consider an abuser as someone who uses recklessly - who uses past the point where negative consequences become apparent, and values getting high other other concerns. I don't consider 'addict' and 'abuser' mutually exclusive.

... which Footzcrazy expressed nicely and which I've only just recently come to realise is the core issue I have with substances.

I have no issue in recognising that I'm an addict. It's clear as day and pretty hard to ignore when the use of the DOC has been the number one priority for every single day for the last few years. That part I can acknowledge.

What shocks me is how little self-control I seem to have left. Numerous times over the last couple of years I decided to get off opiates. Each time I acquired some benzos. I planned to do a rapid taper and then jump within just a few days with the help of the benzos.

And every time I've ended up eating all the benzos and actually taking MORE opiates instead of less.

 

[thestudent14]

I'm definitely still just a user, I sometimes smoke weed during the week but apart from that I keep my usage to the weekends. I nearly never buy meth because I consider it a pretty shit drug compared to any form of MDxx and it's also overpriced, I still take meth regularly because friends know I never want to buy it, but are more then happy to give me some, and hey... I ain't the type to say no to free drugs =)

But I've always been aware of the risks of drug addiction and have never wanted to get myself in that position. Knowing this at the start of my drug use has been very positive for me. This is one of the strongest reasons I can think for if we ever do get legalisation it should definitely be for adults and not minors because everyone I know who has had problems with drug use (all bar one), started using before they were an adult and whilst their addiction didn't kick in then, I can't help but think their recklessness with a drug at that age is more likely to have lasting affects.

I love drugs, I plan to take them my whole life, the last thing I want is for an addiction to stuff that up along the way. As far as abuse is concerned, I only abuse in the immediate short term, e.g I'll gladly take higher quantity's of drugs then the people around me and don't really have much of an issue with guinea pigging myself out to new substances or higher doses. I'm likely to have plenty of speed, 300+mg MDMA (if I can source it at the time), drink whilst pinging and then smoke 20-30+ cones back at a house. So I very much abuse in the heat of the moment, but then I'll be good to my body until my next bender which will only be a few weeks apart and I still drink/smoke weed on the other weeks. But all in all, as far as I can tell my body is still pretty healthy. I will concede this though, drug obsession is another key element in this. I'm not as bad now, but when I first discovered MDMA and other drugs, it occupied a huge amount of my thought process, after reading your post halif I feel closer to understanding addiction then previously. When I was thinking about MDMA all the time, I was in no way addicted, but if I had've kept using high doses weekly(or more often) then I could see how that obsession could turn into addiction (And obviously if a drug had a physical addiction this would be highly intensified as you wouldn't be able to distract yourself with other thoughts as easily). I honestly don't think I have a day where I don't think about MDMA at some point, but I'm perfectly fine about that, often it will just be a brief thought and doesn't interrupt the rest of my life.

 

[popeyes mate]

All of the above :-(

Umm been a busy few weeks on it unfortunatly. Did not sleep Tue or Wed, maybe 4 hrs last night.. And while at my work the whole team has been sick, crying, having 'mental health' days due to stress, I have been sleep deprived and fried as all fuck holding the fort and working 10 hr days, juggling everyones roles and just getting on with it.

Feel so shit but. Sore dry mouth. Dry eyes. What Id give to be a 4 th option. Drug Free long term.

 

[JeanJM]

Addict here. As long as I have my Codeine my life goes on as normal. Without it I would get sick and depressed. Not depressed because I'm coming off my DOC but depressed I am not able to live my life how I want to because society has decided for me what I can and cannot do to my body/mind.

 

[Cadamec]

30 years ago - abuser and addict

Today - casual weed user and chronic pain opiate dependent.

Good topic!

 

[LowHP]

User 80% of the time. I hold great respect for the drugs I take and always ensure I am prepared for the session I'm about to have. That being said, I only indulge in weed and psychedelics, and I've found that it's often psychonauts that have less dependency on their drugs to survive. We use ours not to get through the day but to learn about ourselves and the world; whether or not we actually do learn anything is something many people will argue til the cows come home, but that distinction being there, even in our minds, is what holds us back from psychological addiction. The fact that most don't have physically addictive properties also helps, though.

The other 20% of the time I will admit to being an abuser. There are definitely times when I don't NEED that extra cone, or that 3rd mushroom trip of the week. I find that after those trips/sessions, if I've made the connection that I didn't need it, I regret taking it in the first place. And regret's another whole discussion.

 

[Oldred3s]

I don't abuse drugs. I respect them.
Although I am an addict but its not ruining my life.

 

[Nozphexezora]

Addict here. As long as I have my Codeine my life goes on as normal. Without it I would get sick and depressed. Not depressed because I'm coming off my DOC but depressed I am not able to live my life how I want to because society has decided for me what I can and cannot do to my body/mind.

Society doesn't "decide" what to do with your life; it's just certain ways of living and ethical standpoints become the popular belief and you're considered a minority, in terms of lifestyles, for doing otherwise. I see nothing wrong with society coming up with set guidelines that aren't necessarily compulsory, but rather considered "ideal". The problem which bothers you, I think, is the fact that your lifestyle is just as compatible as the others' and shouldn't be ostracized.

 

[JeanJM]

I can't legally go down to a Pharmacy without a script and buy my weekly Codeine though can I? because of these 'guidelines' which are laws society has created because drugs are deemed bad.
It's also illegal for me to grow my own poppies to use for my own supply because once again laws have been created to stop this.

 

[Nozphexezora]

I can't legally go down to a Pharmacy without a script and buy my weekly Codeine though can I? because of these 'guidelines' which are laws society has created because drugs are deemed bad.
It's also illegal for me to grow my own poppies to use for my own supply because once again laws have been created to stop this.

Everything I say gets taken to offense. Sorry, I thought you meant "Societal standards", not actual laws.