Le Junk
Bluelighter
Well, good ole Le Junk has successfully given up on his 20+ year cocaine/ecstasy adventure, and has now been sober for over 4 months! Suweeeet! 
But now I'm unfortunately reminded of the whole reason I started using those drugs, especially cocaine, in the first place. My ADHD symptoms have now fully resurfaced in full form which takes me back to 23 or so years ago when I first found the perfect self medication for ADHD........cocaine, of course! Once I discovered cocaine (real cocaine) around 1986, all of my ADHD problems were completely solved.
First, let me again reinterate, that real cocaine gives an immediate sense of well-being, immense clarity, depression eraser, intense ability to focus, a sublte and underlying calmness as it is truly a relaxing stimulant, increased confidence, center of the universe, increased talkativeness without obsurdity, with a bonus side of increased libido. Yes, yes, yes, I know todays cocaine is just a mere shell of it's former self with absolutely no positive effects whatsoever, including but not limited to being speedy, edgy, ampy, paranoid, introverted, racy, uncomfortable, difficulty speaking, miserable kind of drug, so NO, I don't like it anymore either, nor would it be a cure for ADHD as well.
However, as most of you are aware by now, I simply learned how to clean todays cocaine and that is what enabled it to still be a cure for my true underlying illness, ADHD. Well now I've quit using coke entirely as it was truly ruining my life and more importantly my marriage, but had forgotten all about the ADHD thingy. Now it's been 4 + months of sobriety and son of a bitch, here's the freakin' ADHD again! Dammit!
Anyway, my symptoms are severe hypertensity, brain constantly swimming, speaking faster than my brain can keep up with, no focus, no concentration, inability to complete tasks, 4 tasks feel like 400, etc. etc. etc.
So, being a former heavy drug user, and being a very good salesman, I naturally wanted the very best of the ADHD drugs and son of a gun I got it, Desoxyn! My doctor had never even heard of Desoxyn, but he ended up writing me a script for it anyway with the help of my bogus advice, but true symptoms. He presecribed me the book recommended dosage of two 5 mg. tablets a day, one to be taken in the morning and one in the afternoon. Now I'm going to be totally honest with you guys about this next part, so try not to judge me. It was the former addict in me that made me do this.............
When I finally got my script filled, I was so excited, just like when scoring blow use to be, that I immediately went home and crushed two of those little 5mg. tablets up and snoted both of them (old habits and not knowing any better). Well, somebody up above was paying me back bigtime because it certainly wasn't anything like coke (which honestly, I was kinda hoping for), but more like pure hell! It didn't burn at all like I thought meth was suppose to, and within 5 minutes I started feeling kinda dizzy. I then, over the next couple of hours, went thru a feeling of being totally disconnected, anti-social, a little disoriented, blurred vision, and kind of an out of body feeling. Anyway, good times!
Is this what meth is suppose to be like? If so, real coke (not todays shit, but real coke) blows this shit away.......BIGTIME! NOTE: Meth users are probably going to say that my method was wrong, it wasn't the right form of meth, that you need to shoot it, smoke it or whatever, but I'm not interested in any of that, so let's just skip the suggestions on that issue, okay. I'm not lookin' down on anybody, I'm just not interested in any new highs, cool? 
Okay, I'll admit the first day was completely idiotic on my part and that I had absolutely no idea of what I was doing. It said on the bottle to ingest the pills and not to immediately rush home, crush them up, and then proceed to snort them. It's just my old habits that got the best of me. So, the first day of supposedly going to just have fun with these little things is completely over now and I never want to got thru that again.......period! I'm now seriously in this for the therapy only, and I have absolutely no idea of how much, how often, or whatever of these to take a day, nor did my doctor really. He simply said we'll start out with the recommended dosage of two 5 mg.s tabs a day, which can be raised to as high as 25 mg.s a day, but that is totally unimaginable to me.
Now, let's cut to present day. I take one in the morning and I get a warm, kind of calming feeling come over me. I actually get so calm that I could probably fall asleep. I can certainly eat a shitload on these things, that's for sure! But I find myself yawning etc. which would tend to make me think it's working, but at too small of a dose. I really don't get any immense clarity or focus either at that dose. Now I will say that the other day I did overdue it with 3 tablets, just to experiment a little with the effects at a higher dose, but did them to close together (all 3 within an 8 hour period) and actually became really amped out! It was almost like being back to my normal ADHD hyperactivity, but I could tell that this time it was drug induced.
But here's the HUGE closer! After going thru the amped out stage which seemed to go on for hours, probably 4 to be exact, I finally came down, and at that point, I truly feel I reached the absolute pinacle of optimum results when this tremendous clarity, calmness and incredible sense of being able to focus on absolutely anything that came across me. I can't recall feeling that "normal" in I don't know how long! That feeling lasted right on thru the rest of the evening and on up to bedtime. I felt great, but without feeling like I was high. Basically, just like I said, "normal". I then fell asleep for 8-9 hours and woke up feeling great!
Since then, I haven't taken anymore at all until I was able to get onto Bluelight and ask if there's anyone else who's on Desoxyn, and if so, just how much their taking, have you experienced any of these side effects, am I taking to little, to much, to often, not often enough, and most importantly, is there a period of time this drug must be taken before any positive results are seen (kind of like SSRI's) and so on. Do the positive effects come later on like they did for me, or are they supposedly immediate once the right dose is acheived? I have so many questions because after feeling the way I felt after that one perfectly unplanned episode, I know I'm probably on the right medication, just on the wrong dosage. Keep in mind, I do not want to get high off of these anymore. It was certainly unpleasant at best.
One final note. Naturally, after hearing I obtained Desoxyn, a couple of my friends insisted I let them try one. On just one, they were both speeding their balls off. They said it was absolutely great! They said they felt no euphoria or anything like coke, but they did say they had the energy of a newborn for hours! One of them cleaned his whole house and did all of his laundry while the other one mowed my lawn for free, and almost the neighbors too before I was actually able to stop him!
Thanks in advance for any responses.
Le Junk
But now I'm unfortunately reminded of the whole reason I started using those drugs, especially cocaine, in the first place. My ADHD symptoms have now fully resurfaced in full form which takes me back to 23 or so years ago when I first found the perfect self medication for ADHD........cocaine, of course! Once I discovered cocaine (real cocaine) around 1986, all of my ADHD problems were completely solved. First, let me again reinterate, that real cocaine gives an immediate sense of well-being, immense clarity, depression eraser, intense ability to focus, a sublte and underlying calmness as it is truly a relaxing stimulant, increased confidence, center of the universe, increased talkativeness without obsurdity, with a bonus side of increased libido. Yes, yes, yes, I know todays cocaine is just a mere shell of it's former self with absolutely no positive effects whatsoever, including but not limited to being speedy, edgy, ampy, paranoid, introverted, racy, uncomfortable, difficulty speaking, miserable kind of drug, so NO, I don't like it anymore either, nor would it be a cure for ADHD as well.
However, as most of you are aware by now, I simply learned how to clean todays cocaine and that is what enabled it to still be a cure for my true underlying illness, ADHD. Well now I've quit using coke entirely as it was truly ruining my life and more importantly my marriage, but had forgotten all about the ADHD thingy. Now it's been 4 + months of sobriety and son of a bitch, here's the freakin' ADHD again! Dammit!
Anyway, my symptoms are severe hypertensity, brain constantly swimming, speaking faster than my brain can keep up with, no focus, no concentration, inability to complete tasks, 4 tasks feel like 400, etc. etc. etc.
So, being a former heavy drug user, and being a very good salesman, I naturally wanted the very best of the ADHD drugs and son of a gun I got it, Desoxyn! My doctor had never even heard of Desoxyn, but he ended up writing me a script for it anyway with the help of my bogus advice, but true symptoms. He presecribed me the book recommended dosage of two 5 mg. tablets a day, one to be taken in the morning and one in the afternoon. Now I'm going to be totally honest with you guys about this next part, so try not to judge me. It was the former addict in me that made me do this.............
When I finally got my script filled, I was so excited, just like when scoring blow use to be, that I immediately went home and crushed two of those little 5mg. tablets up and snoted both of them (old habits and not knowing any better). Well, somebody up above was paying me back bigtime because it certainly wasn't anything like coke (which honestly, I was kinda hoping for), but more like pure hell! It didn't burn at all like I thought meth was suppose to, and within 5 minutes I started feeling kinda dizzy. I then, over the next couple of hours, went thru a feeling of being totally disconnected, anti-social, a little disoriented, blurred vision, and kind of an out of body feeling. Anyway, good times!
Is this what meth is suppose to be like? If so, real coke (not todays shit, but real coke) blows this shit away.......BIGTIME! NOTE: Meth users are probably going to say that my method was wrong, it wasn't the right form of meth, that you need to shoot it, smoke it or whatever, but I'm not interested in any of that, so let's just skip the suggestions on that issue, okay. I'm not lookin' down on anybody, I'm just not interested in any new highs, cool? Okay, I'll admit the first day was completely idiotic on my part and that I had absolutely no idea of what I was doing. It said on the bottle to ingest the pills and not to immediately rush home, crush them up, and then proceed to snort them. It's just my old habits that got the best of me. So, the first day of supposedly going to just have fun with these little things is completely over now and I never want to got thru that again.......period! I'm now seriously in this for the therapy only, and I have absolutely no idea of how much, how often, or whatever of these to take a day, nor did my doctor really. He simply said we'll start out with the recommended dosage of two 5 mg.s tabs a day, which can be raised to as high as 25 mg.s a day, but that is totally unimaginable to me.
Now, let's cut to present day. I take one in the morning and I get a warm, kind of calming feeling come over me. I actually get so calm that I could probably fall asleep. I can certainly eat a shitload on these things, that's for sure! But I find myself yawning etc. which would tend to make me think it's working, but at too small of a dose. I really don't get any immense clarity or focus either at that dose. Now I will say that the other day I did overdue it with 3 tablets, just to experiment a little with the effects at a higher dose, but did them to close together (all 3 within an 8 hour period) and actually became really amped out! It was almost like being back to my normal ADHD hyperactivity, but I could tell that this time it was drug induced.
But here's the HUGE closer! After going thru the amped out stage which seemed to go on for hours, probably 4 to be exact, I finally came down, and at that point, I truly feel I reached the absolute pinacle of optimum results when this tremendous clarity, calmness and incredible sense of being able to focus on absolutely anything that came across me. I can't recall feeling that "normal" in I don't know how long! That feeling lasted right on thru the rest of the evening and on up to bedtime. I felt great, but without feeling like I was high. Basically, just like I said, "normal". I then fell asleep for 8-9 hours and woke up feeling great!
Since then, I haven't taken anymore at all until I was able to get onto Bluelight and ask if there's anyone else who's on Desoxyn, and if so, just how much their taking, have you experienced any of these side effects, am I taking to little, to much, to often, not often enough, and most importantly, is there a period of time this drug must be taken before any positive results are seen (kind of like SSRI's) and so on. Do the positive effects come later on like they did for me, or are they supposedly immediate once the right dose is acheived? I have so many questions because after feeling the way I felt after that one perfectly unplanned episode, I know I'm probably on the right medication, just on the wrong dosage. Keep in mind, I do not want to get high off of these anymore. It was certainly unpleasant at best.
One final note. Naturally, after hearing I obtained Desoxyn, a couple of my friends insisted I let them try one. On just one, they were both speeding their balls off. They said it was absolutely great! They said they felt no euphoria or anything like coke, but they did say they had the energy of a newborn for hours! One of them cleaned his whole house and did all of his laundry while the other one mowed my lawn for free, and almost the neighbors too before I was actually able to stop him!
Thanks in advance for any responses.
Le Junk
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![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
