Mental Health Depression MEGA Thread - DepressionTalk + Over 100 Links of Info

[Lifeonthepharm]

Lifeonthefarm, a lot of symptoms of mental illness can seem to cover what we experience in everyday ("normal") life - often what distinguishes the two is profound impairment or distress.

Yes, it can get quite messy when trying to find the "normal" balance with so many factors involved.

I've learned a new one today, from my original diagnosis (which is about 15 years old) along with depression... I also have an "Adjustment disorder".

Ideally I just want to be able to function. What annoys me the most is that anything can make me snap and start nuking, at any time.

So my reaction to a given situation is dictated by my mood, nothing to do with the situation itself. Maybe that too is completely normal.

Full-blown mania is quite an extreme state and would be difficult to mistake for general good mood.

After some reading and speaking to my doctor, I agree with you. Pretty hard to mistake it. If I had not stumbled across this thread, I still would not know what mania is. Obviously it's my own fault for the mistake of the meaning.

 

[dilated_pupils]

I'm feeling very depressed as of lately. My bipolar has really been so much better now that I'm on lamactil and nortriptyline, but aside from that I am having some very tough depression problems. I've been screwed over by a lot of girls recently, I have legal issues that keep following me wherever I go, I just relapsed again on opiates, and all I do is sleep all day (literally been sleeping til 4-6pm every day lately... It's sad. I am sad... I want to have a life but I'm finally realizing all of my 'friends' are just fake. Everyone always wants me to get them drugs, or to do drugs with them. If I don't partake in such activities, well there just doesn't seem to be any activities left... I wish it wasn't like this but I know you all know what I'm saying. I need to get my life together, but while I sit here waiting to find out when I am going to go to jail, it pushes me down and puts a lot of weight on my shoulders.

I can't start a relationship with a girl, I don't want to put the effort in and then have to go to jail and make things messed up, having to worry about if we'll stay together while I'm gone, I'm missing college this semester too because I'm afraid I'll be in jail during the semester so I can't go at all. Now it's looking like it may not be until a while til I go away, and if so that means missing another semester... everything just sucks. I want to be happy and feel alive, but I no longer have any will to do anything productive. I don't know what to do with myself anymore.

-dp

 

[paranoid android]

Ive had a return to the suicidal mixed state mania type of depression i used to get. I havent had it in ages now months i guess but it feels longer. Id have been happy never to have it again.

Pissed off at everything, feeling utterly hopeless, feeling that everything is fucked and always will be so why fuckin bother so why not fuckin kill myself? Also the feelings to cut are back pretty damn bad.

I don't want to feel like this and im not real sure what brought it on. I always start to feel this way around fall atleast abit though because it's a reminder of what i didnt do with this year and how another one will pass without having accomplished anything.

Even getting high only helps a little, talking to people really doesent help and i only don't notice it when im too fucked to think bout much.

 

[ocean]

^PA- You know, I have been thinking about you today......
Did you recently change meds?
Maybe you should pay a visit to your doctor about getting set on a strict routine.
I am not sure, but are you scheduled with your meds and taking the same meds everyday???
Maybe that would help?

 

[paranoid android]

I think my fucking psychiatrist is on vacation for 3 weeks. It doesent much matter anyway as there isint much i can do. I am taking my meds the same way i always have so that's not it.

It's just the way things have been going lately i think.

 

[DexterMeth]

I just got RXd lopressor yesterday and it does wonders for that insain beating heart/blood preassure...not the mental aspects though; but imo when the physical ones are subsided it makes the mental side a lot easier to manage. Just some food for thought for you all. Oh yeah, FYI, I had to get an EKG before it was deemed safe to be on it.

 

[TakeToTheHills]

I've had OCD for my whole life and depression/GAD/panic attacks for the past 6 years. All of these things have been exacerbated by my drug abuse. I've tried a long list of meds and am on a long list of meds.
My newest is propranolol (beta blocker). I definately agree with you Dexter; now that my heart isn't jumping out of my chest every time I am confronted with a stressor, I can start to slow down, pick my brain, and try to realize that I have no reason to panic

 

[spork]

I seem to be sinking further and further. I thought I was getting better, but as soon as I start to it always seems that something happens to deter it. I'm scared and don't know how long I can keep doing this.

 

[paranoid android]

Ya i get like that alot. Just when i start to feel good something starts to pull me back down. Granted up until now i had felt pretty good actually. Not all the time by any means but i hadent felt suicidal or felt like slashing my arm up in a long time.

 

[dilated_pupils]

Ya i get like that alot. Just when i start to feel good something starts to pull me back down. Granted up until now i had felt pretty good actually. Not all the time by any means but i hadent felt suicidal or felt like slashing my arm up in a long time.

Same man... Right now I feel like hanging myself. My life is going no where, I'm still awaiting trial to find out when and for how long I go to jail which really sucks. I have basically stopped hanging out with all my friend because all they do is drugs/alcohol which I have been doing more since I've been depressed. I feel like my best days are behind me and I'm just hitting 21 years old, which by the way I had plans to go to atlantic city for my birthday and it doesn't seem like it's going to happen now, but I hope it does I really could use a vacation...

-dp

 

[Mjäll]

Gotta spew out some junk over this thread.

My acne is returning, my face is oily as hell, my nose, chin and forehead area is read and burns/itches constantly, I feel like I am melting all the time and this is manifesting itself mentally as well.

My self image is being crushed and rebuilt into a sort of broken puzzle all the time. I can literally choose who I want to be, but I don't see the joy or thrill in being anyone. I don't see the point in expressing myself through clothes, mannerisms, humour, general good social tone. But I don't see the point in the opposite either.

Part of me wants to deny myself all pleasure, but another part is a slave under the temporary reward system.

I lack the capability to make the choice to become a stable, safe character.

 

[dilated_pupils]

I lack the capability to make the choice to become a stable, safe character.

You don't lack the capability, it seems you lack the motivation. Those are two totally separate things, and I think if you put your mind to it and get rid of the cloudiness taking over your thoughts, you will be able to come to a logical, rational, conclusion. Just my 2cents though.

On a side note, I'm feeling a bit better today. Yesterday I finally got some shit done, and I shaved for the first time in a while, I've never grown such a long beard before but it had to go. Actually to my surprise my face cleared up a lot from not shaving (even though I use an electric razor most of the time) and I'm happy about that.

-dp

 

[bang that shit]

I take zoloft for depression and PTSD.... it doesnt make me happy or love life... but last 2 times i tried to get off of it, i became much more depressed than usual. not suicidal... but more like "whats the fuckin point of life"

I do hope to get off it soon... hopefully when my depression clears up, been on it since april. it sucks not being able to do E... cause im on a SSRI

I might switch to remeron, as that is an a-typical anti depressant and i know from friends who are on it works for them as well as zoloft did and they can trip and roll on it.


I also take klonopin for social anxiety.... this med helps me alot.



being depressed sucks

 

[dilated_pupils]

I take zoloft for depression and PTSD.... it doesnt make me happy or love life... but last 2 times i tried to get off of it, i became much more depressed than usual. not suicidal... but more like "whats the fuckin point of life"

I do hope to get off it soon... hopefully when my depression clears up, been on it since april. it sucks not being able to do E... cause im on a SSRI

I might switch to remeron, as that is an a-typical anti depressant and i know from friends who are on it works for them as well as zoloft did and they can trip and roll on it.


I also take klonopin for social anxiety.... this med helps me alot.



being depressed sucks

I was put on zoloft before when the docs thought I just had depression problems, but it ended up making me worse because I'm bipolar. Instead of trying to quit taking an SSRI or anything like them, maybe try switching to a different medication or a higher dose. Don't ever stop taking your meds without knowing how to ween yourself down safely, and under docs orders.

Trying remeron isn't a bad idea. I used to be on it when I was younger for helping me get to sleep after still being kind of hyped up from my adderall. It is a very well known and tested drug, you can read tons of information about it on the internet. So do some research and go talk to your doctor and I'm sure you will find the right medication eventually.

I'm on klonopin as well for my anxiety, but my tolerance is so high it's hard to get much relief these days... I can take 50mgs of klonopin easily and not feel a thing, and I'm only RXed 2mgs a day. Hopefully I will get a higher dosage once I'm off suboxone.

-dp

 

[bang that shit]

I was put on zoloft before when the docs thought I just had depression problems, but it ended up making me worse because I'm bipolar. Instead of trying to quit taking an SSRI or anything like them, maybe try switching to a different medication or a higher dose. Don't ever stop taking your meds without knowing how to ween yourself down safely, and under docs orders.

Trying remeron isn't a bad idea. I used to be on it when I was younger for helping me get to sleep after still being kind of hyped up from my adderall. It is a very well known and tested drug, you can read tons of information about it on the internet. So do some research and go talk to your doctor and I'm sure you will find the right medication eventually.

I'm on klonopin as well for my anxiety, but my tolerance is so high it's hard to get much relief these days... I can take 50mgs of klonopin easily and not feel a thing, and I'm only RXed 2mgs a day. Hopefully I will get a higher dosage once I'm off suboxone.

-dp

yea both times i tried to get off the zoloft, i talked with the doc and we thought it would be chill.... but it wasnt.

I was also on lexapro for a short time... but that was for social anxiety but that didnt really help me so i went back to zoloft.


hahaha i agree 100% on the kpin thing i have such a perma tolerance to that it barely affects me.


My father is a psychiatrist so hes always very up on my meds... always suggesting this and that.... haha its gets pretty bad sometimes. but atleast he knows what hes talking about. my mom is a therapist also... ahahha so i get analyzed ALOT.

 

[dtta]

My father is a psychiatrist so hes always very up on my meds... always suggesting this and that.... haha its gets pretty bad sometimes. but atleast he knows what hes talking about. my mom is a therapist also... ahahha so i get analyzed ALOT.

Fuck man talking about a double edged sword hahaha. free high-quality treatment, but I hope the let you be too!!!

 

[Mjäll]

You don't lack the capability, it seems you lack the motivation. Those are two totally separate things, and I think if you put your mind to it and get rid of the cloudiness taking over your thoughts, you will be able to come to a logical, rational, conclusion. Just my 2cents though.

On a side note, I'm feeling a bit better today. Yesterday I finally got some shit done, and I shaved for the first time in a while, I've never grown such a long beard before but it had to go. Actually to my surprise my face cleared up a lot from not shaving (even though I use an electric razor most of the time) and I'm happy about that.

-dp

Yes, you are right. My mind seems less clouded now that I've come down from about 6 months of OCD symptoms - a 5-MeO-MiPT experience gave me a kick in the butt. Am ready to stop denying myself, I think.

On a side note; good for you!

 

[bang that shit]

Fuck man talking about a double edged sword hahaha. free high-quality treatment, but I hope the let you be too!!!

haha lets just say i cant wait to get back to college in a week. they have been driving me crazy this summer. but then again thats all parents

 

[paranoid android]

I take zoloft for depression and PTSD.... it doesnt make me happy or love life... but last 2 times i tried to get off of it, i became much more depressed than usual. not suicidal... but more like "whats the fuckin point of life"

I do hope to get off it soon... hopefully when my depression clears up, been on it since april. it sucks not being able to do E... cause im on a SSRI

I might switch to remeron, as that is an a-typical anti depressant and i know from friends who are on it works for them as well as zoloft did and they can trip and roll on it.


I also take klonopin for social anxiety.... this med helps me alot.



being depressed sucks

Remeron is worth a shot. It has less side effects or atleast different side effects then the SSRI's and SNRI's. It doesent cause sexual dysfunction or fuck up your sex drive in anyway which is one real good thing about this med. Also it doesent seem to cause physical dependance like most SSRI's and SNRI's. I was on 30mg's for a few months and had no trouble quitting cold turkey at all. So thats another big plus.

The main side effect is a massive increase in appetite that most people get from remeron. After i took the remeron at night i would almost clean out the fridge before i went to sleep. So ya it ain't exactly weight neutral . I found it to be worse then weed for causing the munchies. Also it will pretty much knock you out especially in lower doses. When you get up to around 30mg's the increased norepinephrine starts to offset this effect. I still found it to be one of the best sleep aids out there and i didnt build much of a tolerance to the sedating effects.

So it is certainly worth a shot. If the remeron doesent work try a tricyclic or maybe wellbutrin which is a DNRI.

 

[dilated_pupils]

yea both times i tried to get off the zoloft, i talked with the doc and we thought it would be chill.... but it wasnt.

I was also on lexapro for a short time... but that was for social anxiety but that didnt really help me so i went back to zoloft.


hahaha i agree 100% on the kpin thing i have such a perma tolerance to that it barely affects me.


My father is a psychiatrist so hes always very up on my meds... always suggesting this and that.... haha its gets pretty bad sometimes. but atleast he knows what hes talking about. my mom is a therapist also... ahahha so i get analyzed ALOT.

Ha, damn both parents with psych backgrounds, must be tough. However I bet it's nice that they know what you're going through, rather than not fully understanding what it's like to have real mental issues. My mother has tried to understand me a lot more than my dad, although he has come around a lot more than I ever expected. I just feel like shit though because I'm so much better than who I am becoming and all that I have done thus far in my life and it reflects upon my parents and it makes them think it's their fault... it's not though it's my fault for screwing up with so many things.

-dp