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Dealing with constant sexual frustration

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washingtonbound

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 19, 2013
Messages
572
Location
FL
Hi all, I'm hoping some of you can give me advice on this. I'm 29 years old and have been with thirteen women. I suppose that's about average so I shouldn't be complaining too much. But my issue is that in between these experiences, I experience constant dry spells, the longest being around three years. My current dry spell is coming up on two months and I'm getting quite sick of it. The issue is that I really do not want to get involved in a relationship, at all. This makes me rely on having bullshit "game" to swing women which I don't like either. I don't enjoy drinking too much, and am pretty sick of the bar/club scene. So I'm kind of stuck in a weird position where I end up resorting to masturbation way more than I'd like, and it's causing me mental health issues.

Sorry to rant/bitch but I could really use some advice on this.
 
fairnymph said:
Online
Click to expand...

Are online dating apps for real?
I wouldn't want to use them, either.

@washingtonbound Do you live in a big city? Then there should be regular meetings of people who want the same as you. If you live out in the sticks, I guess you will have to resort to the local bar. Or maybe you can afford the luxury oaf spending a weekend in a bigger city with said meetings.
 
work out the app game,

best app in my city is feeld, its kink friendly so there's interesting people on there.

just try go on dates and go from there, you got this

if lolcows can get pussy so can u

u can be upfront in ur bio that your just after a casual situation rather than looking for a relationship

i have a date tmrw from the app and i'm new to all this and not a huge fan of texting with ppl i haven't met

i see msging with strangers the utility is to arrange to meet up in real life. then just meeting people you think are interesting and attracted too.

if it doesn't work out it's ok because you learnt more about yourself in the process.
 
lecroute said:
Are online dating apps for real?
I wouldn't want to use them, either.

@washingtonbound Do you live in a big city? Then there should be regular meetings of people who want the same as you. If you live out in the sticks, I guess you will have to resort to the local bar. Or maybe you can afford the luxury oaf spending a weekend in a bigger city with said meetings.
Click to expand...

Like orgies or something? Is “regular meeting” code for orgy? 🧐

OP seems to want some specific, almost contradictory things…he doesn’t want anything resembling a “relationship”, but he also doesn’t seem to want to utilize some of the common methods for “flings” (dating apps, trying to be a smooth mac daddy to some random ladies, horning in on some drunk chicks at the bar etc)

I would suggest maybe trying to meet a woman through a shared (non sexual) interest and try to build something up from there…that would take a time investment and may end up looking like a relationship tho 😬
 
washingtonbound said:
Hi all, I'm hoping some of you can give me advice on this. I'm 29 years old and have been with thirteen women. I suppose that's about average so I shouldn't be complaining too much. But my issue is that in between these experiences, I experience constant dry spells, the longest being around three years. My current dry spell is coming up on two months and I'm getting quite sick of it. The issue is that I really do not want to get involved in a relationship, at all. This makes me rely on having bullshit "game" to swing women which I don't like either. I don't enjoy drinking too much, and am pretty sick of the bar/club scene. So I'm kind of stuck in a weird position where I end up resorting to masturbation way more than I'd like, and it's causing me mental health issues.

Sorry to rant/bitch but I could really use some advice on this.
Click to expand...
Maybe try to find a sex buddy? Have you tried explaining how you feel to these women after having had sex with them?

why don’t you want to be in a relationship?

you could hire escorts too, Eros.com looks like a good website for that (I’ve never actually hired one of those girls, I just window shop on there lol)
 
washingtonbound said:
Hi all, I'm hoping some of you can give me advice on this. I'm 29 years old and have been with thirteen women. I suppose that's about average so I shouldn't be complaining too much. But my issue is that in between these experiences, I experience constant dry spells, the longest being around three years. My current dry spell is coming up on two months and I'm getting quite sick of it. The issue is that I really do not want to get involved in a relationship, at all. This makes me rely on having bullshit "game" to swing women which I don't like either. I don't enjoy drinking too much, and am pretty sick of the bar/club scene. So I'm kind of stuck in a weird position where I end up resorting to masturbation way more than I'd like, and it's causing me mental health issues.

Sorry to rant/bitch but I could really use some advice on this.
Click to expand...

If it's just the sexual frustration part: masturbate/masturbate more often. Can I ask why it's causing you mental health issues?
 
washingtonbound said:
I'm not a fan of those, been catfished too many times.
Click to expand...
What apps have you tried? Ask for a pic holding a specific message, of each woman you’re interested in.

I despise dating apps but I’m never looking for casual. Apps are ideal for hookups/finding fuck buddies.

Optimise your profiles, get professional pics taken if necessary. I’d happily make you profiles to maximise your success. Learn a bit about astrology & list it as an interest. Appear as fun, social, & adventurous as possible. Message MANY women, pic vet them as I described above, don’t worry about rejection & you’ll find women, especially if you’re attractive & charming. Happy to provide advice. One of my best friends is a manwhore who is wildly successful with the apps (he has a whole harem of women he rotates through plus constant new partners) & I’ve read many of his interactions. Voice messages are great if you have a good voice, as we women can be very aroused by voice especially if you know how to phrase things with the right tone.
 
lecroute said:
Are online dating apps for real?
I wouldn't want to use them, either.

@washingtonbound Do you live in a big city? Then there should be regular meetings of people who want the same as you. If you live out in the sticks, I guess you will have to resort to the local bar. Or maybe you can afford the luxury oaf spending a weekend in a bigger city with said meetings.
Click to expand...
For real in what sense? Do they work to find people? Absolutely. How well they work for a specific individual varies wildly though.
 
Yeah that's what I've always done, it's not unreasonable to ask the person you're taking to, to send a pic of themselves say with a pain behind their ear 😂 I've done the same in return. Also apps like tinder now require you to verify your photos...
 
ChemicallyEnhanced said:
If it's just the sexual frustration part: masturbate/masturbate more often. Can I ask why it's causing you mental health issues?
Click to expand...
I have a high sex drive yet a bit of an introverted personality, I don't like to approach. I feel that not getting laid very often causes me to struggle more with anger in particular. I notice a lot of people suggesting apps but I honestly find those to be garbage. I think what I'm really looking for is a friends with benefits type arrangement.
 
Try looking into callgirls just to get it outta your system.
Cry wanking, constantly, is very depressing. I want the feel of a sweet smelling mama figure to baby me.. like my mother never did.
 
swimmingbird421 said:
Buy sometimes wanking it is very unhealthy.. emotionally and physically. Check this dr podcast on chronical masturbation.
Click to expand...


That videos is 100% bullshit. Masturbation is actually very healthy. Both physically and emotionally. It's only emotionally unhealthy because of lies (like Religious lies or about it being immoral) that can create a stupid stigma against it.
 
swimmingbird421 said:
I know masturbation is good. But excess is bad. You need a warm body to get that animal smell instinct that naturally gets our blood pummping
Click to expand...

Well, sure, anything in excess is bad. But unless you're doing it to the point where you're avoiding normal social thing, friends, family, work etc inj order to masturbate. Or you're spending hours doing it several times a day, it's all good.
I understand the need/preference for actual sex, obviously.

For just sex, there are MANY hook-up sites and apps, or you could see a sex worker.
I'm afraid I'm completely lost, too, when it comes to actual dating, though.
 
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