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Detox Day 0

endlessnameless

endlessnameless

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 23, 2010
Messages
1,119
Location
Dublin
So I've been planning this detox for a while now. I last tried to do it in December '18 into January '19 but it didn't work out, and I believe it didn't work out because I went from smoking two bags a day to 0 - no comfort meds, no sleep aids (resulting in vivid hallucinations and horrendous anxiety).

This time I'm armed with a little arsenal of medications that should take most of the edge off. I have 25 x 10mg Diazepam, a packet of Immodium and a 24 pack of Neupophen Plus each of which have 12.8mgs of codeine. Most importantly, I've no access to any money for the forseeable 14 days, which is about the time it takes for my withdrawals to subside.

I'm back living at home with my family at the moment and I've told them I have a stomach bug so that'll keep them from asking me whats wrong and why I'm so miserable over the next 12-15 days.

The Diazepam will be a real good friend to me during this detox as its usually the unbearable anxiety that drives me to score.
Does anyone find that Diazepam doesnt work for the first few days of withdrawal? I do, so I'll be keeping them until the anxiety gets unbearable.

Its been 10 months in total and with the comfort meds to take the edge off I'm hoping it wont be too bad.
No doubt as these next two weeks unfold there'll be terrible bouts of suicidal ideation and a lot of rants from me in this thread however I'll try to keep them as entertaining as possible. Any words of encouragement would be very much appreciated - I have no one in my life I can talk to about this so this will be my only outlet.

All I need to do is get to 15 days...
 
I'm curious - to anyone reading this thread who's been through heroin withdrawal before, how long does it take for you to get through the acute withdrawals?
15 days has always seemed a very long time to me. I read left right and centre all over the internet about people detoxing in 3-5 days and I'm astonished. Three to five days is nothing...
 
Heroin withdrawal. It will be mostly over by day 7. Days 3-5 are the worst. You should feel better on day 6 and hopefully sleep a little on day 7. For me once I get the first sleep things get better pretty quick.


You've got good meds. I think you can do it. Keep us updated and feel free to pm me if you want to talk
 
You can do it! I don't know if taking it one day at a time helps you, but that's how I looked at it during alcohol detox the first few times! It sucks but you can do it. You can also pm me if you'd like, I'm in a sober living with 90 days under my belt! I got off booze and heroin this last time. The va put me out with adavant then I transferred to a rehab! You got this!
 
Cant emphasise how much I appreciate the responses guys. I might take you up on your offers to chat via PM when the depression gets really bad. I have a debt to pay off tomorrow and thats the last time I want to see a fucking heroin dealer again.

Day 1
Woke up with the usual sweats and chills and feelings of dread, nothing too heavy yet. Took a very small amount of codeine and forced myself up. We have a skip coming tomorrow as I'm helping my father to clear out the house and the back garden so I'm going to try my best to as much physical work through these withdrawals as I can because lying on my bed with my own thoughts could lead to something bad happening. I want to keep as active as possible. I've heard of that method being done in rehabs in Ireland.

In fact I think I'll stop with the codeine if there's a chance for this to be over with within 5-7 days. I'm the same CJ, as soon as I notice I'm starting to get a bit of sleep I know its almost over.

Thank god I've never had an issue with alcohol as I find that can help in getting me to sleep. Not that I'd be drinking every night, but if I go two nights without sleeping I'd have a few glasses of wine to help me sleep as any more than 3 or 4 nights without sleep in withdrawal and I get crazy hallucinations.

So 8pm on Day 1. If this is over in 7 days it'd be the shortest detox ever. It's usually always taken 2 weeks but most of those times I was probably stretching it out with codeine. I'll prepare myself for 15 days in any case.

By the way CJ, what was your ROA and how much were you using per day? A week seems incredibly short. Again, appreciate the replies and I'll keep you updated on my progress.

My last detox story was a crazy one - I flew over to Canada with a bag full of benzos and codeine and how the hell I go over and back is beyond me. Thats a story I'll tell when my mind starts to clear - its absolutely insane.
 
DUDE!!! You got this!!! You so got this!!! If I can fucking do it anyone can. I've been on the horse for years and years. I am on day 4!!! I had nothing but clonidine and Zofran for nausea. Also some Zubsolv if I felt I needed it if/and or I got to the 3 day mark. The last time I tried inducting I did not wait long enough. So that shit scared me from wanting to get clean again. But I fucking did it!! I was eating clonidine like they were M&M's!!! And that's some scary shit because I thought I might drop. But when my blood pressure didn't lower enough to kill me, I want ALL IN WITH THE CLONIDINE!! Today was day 4 and I
finally took a crumb of Zub. And I felt pretty damn good all things considered. Like how my cat dropped dead today:( So, I've got a heavy load right now but you can soooo do this.

And you are worth it!
Stay the course
 
Your mind is going to be your worst enemy during this time. Even with the comfort meds, there just isn't an easy way. You just have to go through it. And you can. I'm telling you that you can. Turn off your brain and take it hour by hour. If you can get through one night, you will get through another. And before you know it the worst is behind you. It is not easy and I wouldn't wish this nightmare on my worst
enemy. Hang in there
 
good luck. how are you feeling today?

all the people saying they don't really sleep to late in makes me kinda glad i'd be coming down from quite excessive crack use at the same time, i could sleep for the first 24-36 hours no problem.

i agree with cj that days 3-5 are worst, then by day 7 its mostly lethargy, body feeling heavy. it takes a while to feel completely better but i think a lot of the lethargy is due to sleep being fucked up for a while. i've had rattles last over 10 days when i used codeine, loperamide, to make it easier, so use with caution, and if you have to wait as long as possible and take as little as possible.

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edit* i am in no way recommending crack. it fucking destroyed me. to be so under slept that you'll sleep for 24 hours straight means you'll have been psychotic for days. if my fight or flight response tended towards fight, i could have easily assaulted a ransomer in the street cos i thought they were threatening to kill me. waking up on day 3 of a rattle is about the only good thing about it, cos i always felt a bit hard done by and typically if i'd been awake days 1 and 2 would fail on day 3 cos it was too hard.
 
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Drank myself to sleep last night. Will probably do the same tonight. The withdrawals haven't even peaked yet but they're in the post. Nose is running down to my chin, serious hot/cold sweats, pain all over yada yada. The depression is fucking HORRIFIC. Nothing will quell that, only time. I'm going to take some codeine as I have to help my father clear out the back garden. The physical work will keep my mind busy - off the thoughts of another 13 days of this, off the thoughts of loneliness/recent heartbreak (hurts more than the withdrawal, really love that girl...), feeling like an absolute useless fool and general self-pity.

Is there any natural or OTC meds that will just knock me the fuck out? Diazepam aren't worth a wank when it comes to putting me asleep and I'm trying to save them for when the anxiety gets completely unbearable.
 
Keep hanging in there, endless.
I don't know how you are able to drink that early into your detox, but I realize that you probably just want to be able to sleep. I've always felt worse anytime I drank within the acute withdrawal phase, which for me is 3-5 days. Those sleepless nights are the worst though, and after spending hours staring at the back of my eyelids and kicking the bed all night, I just get so physically and mentally fatigued that I give up and go cop early the next morning, which is usually why I rarely make it past the acute withdrawal stage.

I'm past it now though, and I've been finding that melotonin seems to actually work once I'm at least a week off opiates. In the stage you are in, nothing worked for me. Only time. Hopefully you are different though, and find something outside of alcohol to at least get you a couple of hours.

One day at a time. If you start focusing on thoughts of "another 13 days of this", it's going to feel like you are slowly crawling up a mountain, and never see the peak. For me, I had to remind myself that every day was a little better than the day before, which isn't easy when you still feel like hell. You are likely only about a week or less away from feeling noticeably better. Sure, the depression and lethargy will likely still be strong, but the fluids pouring out of your body, the sneezing, yawning, sweats, chills, restlessness etc will likely be drastically reduced by then.

I learned to appreciate what I think of as 'small wins', and little feelings that I'm starting to get better, rather than wondering when I would feel 'normal' again. I'm hoping by sharing my changes in my mindset, it might help you in some way.

Every day, F it, every hour off opiates is a step closer to feeling better again. My prayers go out to you.
 
Thanks for that message Travis. Unfortunately I ended up copping another four bags over the last week so I'll have to begin again. I wont let it defeat me though, I'm still as determined as when I began this thread. I might have a word with my father tomorrow or friday at the latest - I cant deal with this on my own any longer.
 
endlessnameless said:
Is there any natural or OTC meds that will just knock me the fuck out? Diazepam aren't worth a wank when it comes to putting me asleep and I'm trying to save them for when the anxiety gets completely unbearable.
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Antihistamines might, but I get the feeling that wouldn't work well in opiate withdrawal and I am not sure why and wouldn't be able to tell you.

I don't know what else would help, I am sorry.
 
i've never had any luck with anything apart from zopiclone/zolpidem. quetiapine used to knock me out but i always mixed it with loads of other stuff, its not exactly natural. does weed count? i've tried everything OTC under the sun for sleep, never had any luck. got a strong suspicion that for wd related insomnia you probably need something heavy duty.

good luck endless, you will get there. it IS doable! get as much psychological help as you can get. it would be good to have family on board too. and they probably know something is up anyway, it might take a weight off their mind to know what it is and that you're working on it sincerely.
 
Captain.Heroin said:
Antihistamines might, but I get the feeling that wouldn't work well in opiate withdrawal and I am not sure why and wouldn't be able to tell you.

I don't know what else would help, I am sorry.
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No worries mate, thanks for the reply regardless.

Yeah I think I'm going to have a sit down with my dad and tell him whats been going on. The thoughts of it is giving me a fucking panic attack so I took 30mgs of diazepam. I was told before if this happened again I'd have to find somewhere else to live...so do I be honest and risk it or not say a word and be obviously in withdrawal and lie is what I'm trying to decide.
 
Honestly, I don't know what to tell you. There are philosophers and traditionally me who would urge you to be honest about it. Then there's the practical side of life, that if you are homeless trying to get clean your rates of success are much lower.

What were the terms? What were you like before? Were you using in his presence, overdosing, legal issues? Or was the withdrawal enough for him to turn his nose up at you?
 
chinup said:
i've never had any luck with anything apart from zopiclone/zolpidem. quetiapine used to knock me out but i always mixed it with loads of other stuff, its not exactly natural. does weed count? i've tried everything OTC under the sun for sleep, never had any luck. got a strong suspicion that for wd related insomnia you probably need something heavy duty.

good luck endless, you will get there. it IS doable! get as much psychological help as you can get. it would be good to have family on board too. and they probably know something is up anyway, it might take a weight off their mind to know what it is and that you're working on it sincerely.
Click to expand...

Cheers. I'm confident I can do it, I've done it before and have had plenty of clean time under my belt and I know *exactly* why I relapsed last august too (a once off circumstance). I have a much better chance of actually staying sober if the people I'm living with know so I'll tell my father on friday...he's not going to throw me out, he know's I'm not a bad fucking guy. I'm not out there stealing from people or anything of the like.
 
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