• BASIC DRUG
    DISCUSSION
    Welcome to Bluelight!
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Benzo Chart Opioids Chart
    Drug Terms Need Help??
    Drugs 101 Brain & Addiction
    Tired of your habit? Struggling to cope?
    Want to regain control or get sober?
    Visit our Recovery Support Forums
  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

crack power vs Willpower

Nnonovia

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 6, 2015
Messages
77
Location
Baltimore
I don't get it, and that's what keeps my curiosity rolling. Even though, I have had heart complications just in the past 8 months, I have money to buy some crack. I don't want to smoke but the last time I smoked, while and immediately after I finished I ended up calling for an ambulance because I was having chest pains that was radiating down my left arm. right now I'm sitting here going back and forth with myself knowing that there's a chance if I tried to smoke again I could end up going to the hospital for the same thing or worse. I'm only 33 I'm not supposed to be having heart complications. I can't say I do live a normal life and not that of a crackhead...anymore, but I fight everyday to keep this normal life that I have. what is this mystery this elusive power that cocaine has over a person, that one is willing to risk their life to have it?
 
Man i gotta say. I've noticed with stimulants, as time goes on, you develop these symptoms and stimulant ticks over the course of the high. The older you get, the quicker those symptoms come on! It's really likely you'll get the same sensation again within very short order of taking crack. The body knows, it remembers, and will signal sooner and sooner until it gives up.
 
You sound like a smart guy, you know this is going to kill you; Google Eros and Thanatos if you would like a psychoanalytic view on your compulsions.
 
Thank you for your response, I agree, my body does let me know, but the freakin high. Even though I could die my body still wants the high. Befaffling....
 
Thank you for your response, I do agree the body will let you know, I am on a daily fight everyday. I like coming here for support from people like you, I appreciate it.
 
Top