Mental Health Coming off Invega/Xeplion (paliperidone) injections v. 9

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Another day, wasted to invega and the consequences of my actions.

I pray for better days in the future.

I feel like a shell of myself and am so scared for my future.

Pray we all recover from this poison.
 
Anyone see that girl on tik tok in Pakistan onijah Robinson? Look it up. She is like full delusional. Probably get herself and invega shots.
 
I've put on over 10 kilos all I do is sit at home and eat food. I'm to stressed out to do anything else. These doctos treating me like a drug addict because I tested positive to every single drug under the sun. But I got spiked and didn't know what I was taking. I'm devastated a friend gave me these drugs and he's ruined my life.

I'd already done a good job at ruining it. But he just tipped me over the edge with this drug induced psychosis.

Fuck I really don't want to be alive hey. I wish existence wasn't a thing. I'm scared for what happens when we die. Yet don't want to be alive anymore.
 
I can grove to music again, but I don't crave music like I used to. I don't feel it as much. I feel like I'm walking past something beautiful and I don't look at it.
That's good to hear thanks for sharing your positive updates.
 
I can't believe when they discharged me from hospital they recommend being on invega for a year. You do not need to be on this shit for a year. I'm sorry but if you don't have schizophrenia that is some absolute dog shit medical advice.

Tony i feel for you having so many injections. I would not survive the year.

Absolute monsters that recommend this for a year.
 
I feel like I've fucked my entire life up. My state of mind is one of oh my god. I hate my life. I'm a pathetic fucking loser. Shoot me now. 🤣
I'm also bored as fuck sitting at home doing the same shit i did yesterday. Just wasting my life away. I really wish Australia had guns so I could end my life. Or at least have the option. I'm so fucking miserable and regretful it's not even funny.

I've done so much dumn shit in psychosis now im suffering the consequences of my actions that I don't even remember doing
 
Is there any shift of your value system etc?

I just realised there is no possible way that I can be rich in this life

I had to find something to focus on other than being rich in my life.
 
Just do it
You are just speaking for us haha
Thanks WBGA always appreciate you. I'm just fucking bored to death of watching tik toks. But my brain can't really handle anything else. I quit a job after being bullied for 2 years. I quit it while having in hindsight a manic episode that I keep having flashbacks to all the dumb shit I did. Then I did a line of drugs with a friend and lead me into pyschosis. I sent so many stupid emails to my doctors saying the dumbest shit imaginable now I've been judged as a total loser druggo by society and it ficking sucks.

Since 2011 to 2024 I've been I. Full time employment. Now I'm just nothing
 
Thanks WBGA always appreciate you. I'm just fucking bored to death of watching tik toks. But my brain can't really handle anything else. I quit a job after being bullied for 2 years. I quit it while having in hindsight a manic episode that I keep having flashbacks to all the dumb shit I did. Then I did a line of drugs with a friend and lead me into pyschosis. I sent so many stupid emails to my doctors saying the dumbest shit imaginable now I've been judged as a total loser druggo by society and it ficking sucks.

Since 2011 to 2024 I've been I. Full time employment. Now I'm just nothing
That's right.

I am nothing too.

I have to find happiness in nothing.
 
That's right.

I am nothing too.

I have to find happiness in nothing.
I can only hope with time i unfuck my life. I'm just really stressed because just go back to see the stupid fucking psychiatrist they've appointed me after hospital on Friday where I will be begging him not to cut off my supply of anti anxiety meds. He's a total fuck head. He tried giving me a hand out on emotional regulation last time I was there. Telling me there are ways to manage.
.I'm like fuck head I am in hell from this poison.
 
I'm just devastated to have this label of a drug fucked fool. I'm not a drug fucked fool. But that's the lable I have now. Sometimes I luke to take more of my medication to get myself out of my head. Now I can't do that because this new psychiatrist counts the medication to the day and is prescribing it weekly.

Total fucking asshole. Doesn't know me from a nar of soap. But because I ended up in hospital against my will. I'm forever now labelled something.

I can't ever change this label. My friend that gave me these drugs I curse him for doing this to me. Said it was ketamine. Well it was apparently meth, benzos and opiates. Not ketamine.

Fuck my life. Ruined
 
I'm just devastated to have this label of a drug fucked fool. I'm not a drug fucked fool. But that's the lable I have now. Sometimes I luke to take more of my medication to get myself out of my head. Now I can't do that because this new psychiatrist counts the medication to the day and is prescribing it weekly.

Total fucking asshole. Doesn't know me from a nar of soap. But because I ended up in hospital against my will. I'm forever now labelled something.

I can't ever change this label. My friend that gave me these drugs I curse him for doing this to me. Said it was ketamine. Well it was apparently meth, benzos and opiates. Not ketamine.

Fuck my life. Ruined
I was also introduced to weed by a roommate which caused psychosis.

I was curious about what would happen if I mix mushroom and weed and here I am suffering my life hahaha
 
I was also introduced to weed by a roommate which caused psychosis.

I was curious about what would happen if I mix mushroom and weed and here I am suffering my life hahaha
Yeah it's fucked hey. I've dabbled in drugs for years. But I was already manic when I did this line of drugs so I just went over the edge.

Fuck I used to throw judgement at people for things like this. And now look at me. I've become the thing I never thought i would become.

A loser with brain rotting because he flew to close to the sun. Wish the drugs killed me. Honestly
 

Niguma Dopa: The Light That Came After Losing Everything

Niguma Dopa grew up in a wealthy and comfortable environment during his youth. His family held a high position in the local community, and he was showered with praise and expectations from an early age. His life seemed like a perfectly assembled puzzle. But one day, his life came crashing down unexpectedly.


The Night Consumed by FlamesOne cold winter night, Niguma Dopa was deep in sleep when, at dawn, a sudden noise jolted him awake. His entire house was engulfed in flames. The fire spread so quickly that he and his family had no choice but to flee barefoot into the freezing night. That night, he lost his home, his possessions, and everything he had cherished. What burned away in the flames wasn’t just material wealth—his pride, sense of security, and all his future plans turned to ashes in an instant.


The next morning, he sat in front of the charred remains of his house, staring blankly. Not even tears would come to his eyes. For the first time, he felt how cruel the world could be. "Why me? What did I do to deserve this?" Anger and resentment filled his heart. He believed the world was unfair and spent his days drowning in despair.


Questions That Arose from LossAs time slowly passed, Niguma Dopa began to sink into deep contemplation. He started questioning whether the things he had lost were truly important. Gradually, he realized how fleeting and meaningless the wealth and status he had once treasured really were. A voice deep inside whispered to him:
"None of these things ever made you truly happy. What is it that you are really searching for?"


Drawn by this inner voice, he resolved to give away everything he had left—his remaining belongings and clothes—and set out on the road with nothing. He chose the life of a wanderer, but at first, he was more miserable than anyone else. Hunger gnawed at him as he struggled to find food, and on cold nights, without proper clothing, he shivered uncontrollably. His body grew weaker, and his mind was consumed by emptiness. Yet, he did not give up. With unwavering determination, he continued walking, convinced that he needed to find something within himself to replace what he had lost.


Meeting the Master: Light in the DarknessOne day, he arrived in a small village where he met an elderly man. The old man saw the deep sorrow and longing in Niguma Dopa’s eyes and said to him:
"Young man, what are you searching for? Do you not know that everything in this world changes and fades? If you seek true peace, you must look within."


These words struck a chord deep in Niguma Dopa’s heart. Following the old man’s teachings, he retreated to the mountains to begin a long period of solitary meditation. At first, it was unbearably difficult. Pain and fear tormented him endlessly during his meditations. But he refused to give up. He became one with nature and relentlessly worked to uncover true freedom and peace hidden deep within his heart.


After several years, one morning during deep meditation, he suddenly attained enlightenment. He experienced the truth that everything he had once treasured had no real substance—it was impermanent and ultimately nonexistent. In that moment, his mind became completely free. He stopped clinging to worldly conditions and circumstances and felt true peace and freedom for the first time.


Returning to the World as a TeacherAfter attaining enlightenment, Niguma Dopa returned to the world. He shared his insights with many people, saying:
"What we lose can sometimes be a gift that leads us to greater truths. Everything in this world changes and disappears. But deep within our hearts lies eternal peace. To find it, we must first let go of everything."


For the rest of his life, he lived simply and humbly. He practiced compassion and kindness, understanding and comforting others in their suffering. His teachings remain an important tradition in Tibetan Buddhism to this day, continuing to inspire countless people.




Conclusion

Niguma Dopa’s story gives us hope that even through unexpected loss and suffering, we can reach enlightenment. He lost everything, but in the process, he discovered a greater truth and found true freedom and peace. His life teaches us an important lesson: "The difficulties of life can become opportunities for growth."


His journey of pain and enlightenment speaks to us with these words:
"In the moment we lose everything, we finally have the chance to discover what truly matters."
 
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