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Coming clean

Sanity?

Sanity?

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 22, 2008
Messages
104
Location
Australia
Ok, so for the last three and a half or so years I've been a meth addict. And for the last year a xanax addict. Well really poly drug addict cause I use almost anything.

Anyway, the time has come where I went for help with my meth addiction, my parents and my boyfriends parents found out about the addiction, my gp knows, grandparents, my rheumatologist..... basically EVERYONE! My problem is..... I feel really awkward.

That probably seems like an obvious statement but does anyone have any advice for getting the awkwardness of people knowing your 'little secret'? I'm not a big speaker of feelings and people keep interrogating me about my feelings, my plans for the future, my current use etc etc... its never ending. If someone had a magic statement that would get everyone off my back that would be grand!!!!

Wishful thinking, huh?
 
Sanity? it's good that you've seeked help for your problem. Now I guess you have to deal with people opinion of it. I can speak from experience of having people find out about a problem drug related. It is weird, and awkward but after time most people just stop talking about it. I feel time is the only cure.

It is wishful thinking that anyone here can make you feel less awkward. Also I think feeling awkward shows that you care what these people think about you. You wanted help and now this help is making you feel a bit strange. Some people will be dicks about it regardless just try to ignore them, as long as your close friends/family get over it and can help you out.

Goodluck.
 
Thanks!! I'm 9 days clean of the meth. I'm still on xanax cause I have to wait til next week to see the drug & alcohol doctor at the hospital. My gp prescribed me 8mg xanax daily and I have to pick it up from the pharmacy in my little jar each day..... feels so druggo.

I moved out and am living with my grandparents for a little while. Lol, last night I just got home from work and we were all sitting in front of tv when this show called "ADDICTION" came on, about some rehab house in Vic. I cracked up cause my nan was like "Ohhh I should tape this one. How relevant". She taped it but I think the show was a load of crap :p
 
haha...wow, congratulations on coming out with the truth! My entire family would disown me if they knew, my dad already has (but I'm thankful to have as little to do with him as possible, TBH). so it's good that they've been supportive. you will probably find it easier to abstain when you have to be held accountable, too. I guess you just need to focus on the reasons to stay clean, which will always far outweigh the reasons to use :)

and really at the end of the day there is nothing wrong with asking for help. it's a very brave and grown-up thing to do. an ascension from addiction into healthy living is far more respectable than descending into the underworld of narcotics for the rest of all eternity.....
 
Hey Sanity, I've recently had something similar where I have had to talk to a lot of people openly about my addiction problems when I didn't really want to. I had to talk to my shrinks, a psychologist, my parents, my girlfriend... it was a very emotional thing for me because I had been hiding it for a long time, but I have psychiatric problems that are complicated by my drug abuse and if I want to get better then I need to cut the drugs out.

It was very awkward at first, but I decided I would be honest about everything - my usage, my feelings about it, my motivations, everything. Any question they asked, I would answer honestly. And pretty quickly I no longer felt that awkwardness, it was all out in the open and I was dealing with it along with everyone else in an effort to get better.

If your family is supportive of you, then they will help you. Tell them that you feel awkward about it, but you want to be honest.
 
*Enter self congratulatory post*

It's now been 24 days, 25 if you include today (Sunday) since I have touched my beloved meth!!!!!!!!!!!!! I havent had anywhere near this amount of time off since starting use, I didn't think it was possible for me.

I go into hospital on Monday for three days to the detox ward to stabilise my xanax onto valium and get my anxiety/depression meds sorted out. I'm so scared. I have no idea what to expect.
 
^ I was maybe going to go into in-patient detox but didn't end up doing it, didn't need to. I wouldn't be scared, it will probably be boring more then anything. :)
 
Sanity? said:
*Enter self congratulatory post*

It's now been 24 days, 25 if you include today (Sunday) since I have touched my beloved meth!!!!!!!!!!!!! I havent had anywhere near this amount of time off since starting use, I didn't think it was possible for me.

I go into hospital on Monday for three days to the detox ward to stabilise my xanax onto valium and get my anxiety/depression meds sorted out. I'm so scared. I have no idea what to expect.
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Congrats man. great work.

yeah it probably will get a bit boring in hospital, particualrly considering you'll be sober. i suggest you bring alog a lap top with plenty of movies to help you pass the time. or a good book to read (if you feel up to reading).

but think about this, after this you are drug free and you have that monkey off your back. think about how much extra money you will have too, and also how you are not going to feel shit unless you have drugs in your system. Sobreity is underrated on this site.

I too have had to come out and be honest with my family and GP about my drug use (well not some of the doof binges - my god my mother would have a heart attack!) as well as other issues. Yeah your right, initially it feels awkward and is a fucking hard thing to do, to be so honest with another person when you know it will change how they will think of you. Some people will be very compassionate, some won't (ignore them). some will also give you some tough love.

Being honest and admitting things have spiralled out of control (and dealing with the awkwardness that accompanies this) is really the first step towards recovery.

All the best mate.
 
Good to hear!


I have recently spoken to my family, several gp's, etc about my weed addiction, nothing compared I know but still awkward as hell.

However, I have been un-able to obtain any help other than a counselor. My last GP told me that due to the unlikelihood of success that anything else would be a waste of time and money.
 
mate i have not had a bong for 6 years ! anyway next time u get a throatinfection dont take your antis so u get sicker then u will be unable to have a billy for 2 weeks and u will be able to sleep nornaly also
 
^ I don't think that's the best or healthiest way to stop smoking.

Don't underestimate your willpower Jakeperson, especially when you have support behind you no matter what form it takes (GP, counselor, family, friends, etc...)
 
^ Let me guess, you don't believe in a marijuana addiction?

I never sucked a cock for a cigarette but I'd say I'm sure as hell addicted to those.
 
big plums said:
mate i have not had a bong for 6 years ! anyway next time u get a throatinfection dont take your antis so u get sicker then u will be unable to have a billy for 2 weeks and u will be able to sleep nornaly also
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Have had sleeping problems since early childhood, I doubt they have just disappeared.

Mr Blonde said:
^ I don't think that's the best or healthiest way to stop smoking.

Don't underestimate your willpower Jakeperson, especially when you have support behind you no matter what form it takes (GP, counselor, family, friends, etc...)
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I haven't smoked in 24 hours or something like that, my memory isn't good enough to be positive on that but I'm not smoking again for a few weeks.

TripppAR said:
..... unapproved
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No but I quit my job because of it and bought weed instead of food/rent/bills etc for ages, that good enough for you?
 
Last edited by a moderator:
TripppAR said:
Ha ha.. its not a comp bro. But that's weak as a mo fo !
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It's stupid to compare someone's issues to another's. Clearly everything is relative to oneself, I'm sure there's shit that you care about that others think is "weak as a mo fo".


On topic.. well done Sanity, keep it up :)
 
I got back out today. I HATED it. They dropped my dose so quickly. I felt really nauseous but they wouldn't let me have any anti-nausea medication until I peed in a cup so they could do a pregnancy test. Only problem was I felt too sick to drink and so I couldn't pee.

After a while I got so pissed off I marched into the nurses station and demanded that they give me my meds cos I didn't give a shit if I was pregnant - I'd get abortion cos it would be mutated anyway.... They gave me my maxalon after that.

I'm so tired of trying.... quitting is so hard when you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
 
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