I posted a pick in "what are you smoking" in CD.
I'll look that up real soon my man.
Right on. That's a winning attitude. I'm also trying to get my shit together more and fulfill my potential. I think finding out yesterday that I'm going to be an uncle is the kick in the ass I needed to work a lot harder. I want to be able to support my sister a lot more by traveling to the UK, treating her to some nice meals etc and getting stuff for the baby when it arrives. I'm also sick of being so broke all the time or working on a shoestring budget, it's not good for my self-esteem to have been more or less out of work for so long. Also, it's definitely time to gtfo of France. I'm hoping I can score some work back in Amsterdam or maybe I'll make a move to Berlin, a lot of it is dependent on work and the Covid situation.
Anyhow, you can do it and so can I.
I have read your posts and sometimes they seem real hopeless.
I can give you some philosophy which has given me hope.
Life is suffering, understand it. World is a bad place and gummy bears aren't distributed equally.
However you have the power in you to change that.
Have you ever been in a situation like where you have to fight or for example have to save your friend from drowning?
It's scary, but after it you feel so good. You realize you are tougher than you thought, much tougher.
I once owed lots of money. I had been in hospital for months, not being able to call the guy. Then Iwas an idiot and didn't call him for months.
Well, then I decided that because of I'm going to walk up to the guy some day so I have to do it.
I called him and I thought I will lose my fingers or something.
I told him my adress.
Well, he came over and he hugged me. He said he respects me for calling him. He said let's forgot the past and you don't have to pay.
You're a man, because you don't run. I explained him I had been in hospital for 3 months and almost died and he understood.
In the end we ended up making a deal I pay half of it in parts. Now we're real good friends.
After the situation I felt so good.
You have to find purpose in your life and be virtuous. After a situation where you decide to go with your morals instead of going with someone else's dumb idea you feel great. That's a virtue.
Happiness is not something you're entitled to. It's a gift from god, blessed by his warm hand for the few and strong.
You're stronger than you think, but the world is much worse than you think.
The thing is - You are the thing, which can affect that.
Don't compare yourself to others, compare yourself to yourself of yesterday and ask - "Who's better?"
Don't try to fix the world, fix the problems you can affect. Start by cleaning your house for an example. Then you can advance from that.
If you can't keep your house in order, You can't keep a town in order. If you can't keep a town in order, how could you keep a city in order? If you can't keep a city in order, how could you keep the country in order?
Find yourself a purpose and follow that. Purpose gives you meaning and happiness is byproduct of that. It's not something you're just given. You have to get it.
Your problems are mostly your fault, but you still can fix them.
I could go on and on, but I hope this gives you something.
Best regards - DMW