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caught bf whacking it to a pic of my bff-and confusion ensues
- Thread starter IAmTheWalrus
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Bluelighter
I have a couple of things I'd like to know before I comment (of course, don't answer these if they are too personal):
- Do you ever have sex or do anything that results in him having an orgasm? If so, how often?
- were you fooling around before you left the room?
- Do you ever have sex or do anything that results in him having an orgasm? If so, how often?
- were you fooling around before you left the room?
IAmTheWalrus
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2005
- Messages
- 241
we usually do something once a week (we usually only get to see each other on the weekends bc im away at college right now;when this happened he was staying at my dorm during the week bc his birthday was coming up and we were going to go out) and he usually does orgasm.
we were not doing anything before i left the room. he brought his guitar hero and game stuff so he was playing games when i left.
we were not doing anything before i left the room. he brought his guitar hero and game stuff so he was playing games when i left.
omg that is ridiculous. i find that as complete disrespect for u and your property. he should have waited to get home or go to the bath room but instead he is so rude as to do it in your room. i mean after messing around with a girl i have jacked off but i mean i at least had the decency to go home lol. no offense but your boy friend sounds GROSS!
satricion
Bluelighter
He should have picked another time to have a wank.
I don't see how this can be controversial. Jerking off to a picture of your girlfriend's friend the second she leaves the room is weird.
It's not about whether or not he fantasizes about other women, or whether or not he masturbates or whatever. It's that he had a wank right there in your room the second you left, over your friend. That's weird man!
I don't see how this can be controversial. Jerking off to a picture of your girlfriend's friend the second she leaves the room is weird.
It's not about whether or not he fantasizes about other women, or whether or not he masturbates or whatever. It's that he had a wank right there in your room the second you left, over your friend. That's weird man!
arcarsenal
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 14, 2001
- Messages
- 151
This is so stupid.
Fuck your boyfriend, for god's sake. Even your description of when you do get him off sounded boring and lackluster.
Think about it. He has an overly needy girlfriend, who makes a very large and 'frightened' deal out of her boyfriend jacking it, and then decides that couples counseling is a good way to talk about it?
Fuck your boyfriend AND LIKE IT, because someone else is about to.
Also, you call them 'urges he cannot control.' I'd bet a dollar right now that he CAN control his urges, but didn't really give a damn.
And, I agree, we would all like for our partners to be most attracted to ourselves (I would certainly stray away from 'only attracted' like the OP said). But, what's to be attracted to in sporadic, lackluster, self-conscious sex (in all likelihood, coerced-via-necessity)?
Fuck your boyfriend, for god's sake. Even your description of when you do get him off sounded boring and lackluster.
Think about it. He has an overly needy girlfriend, who makes a very large and 'frightened' deal out of her boyfriend jacking it, and then decides that couples counseling is a good way to talk about it?
Fuck your boyfriend AND LIKE IT, because someone else is about to.
Also, you call them 'urges he cannot control.' I'd bet a dollar right now that he CAN control his urges, but didn't really give a damn.
And, I agree, we would all like for our partners to be most attracted to ourselves (I would certainly stray away from 'only attracted' like the OP said). But, what's to be attracted to in sporadic, lackluster, self-conscious sex (in all likelihood, coerced-via-necessity)?
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MattPsy
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jan 15, 2006
- Messages
- 1,616
Personally I think it pretty funny 
.
It /is/ a bit weird that he didn't wait till he was back home or something I will admit, but fuck, if he's /that/ horny - he needs some serious release!
To the OP: You've blown it way out of proportion. I can only hope this isn't the tip of the iceberg of such overreactions.
He was really horny, perhaps a bit kinky as well so found the location and circumstances he was in extra arousing, and he just had to get off. That's all there is to it. Give the man what he needs and enjoy it at the same time, or find someone else, imo =/ .
.It /is/ a bit weird that he didn't wait till he was back home or something I will admit, but fuck, if he's /that/ horny - he needs some serious release!
To the OP: You've blown it way out of proportion. I can only hope this isn't the tip of the iceberg of such overreactions.
He was really horny, perhaps a bit kinky as well so found the location and circumstances he was in extra arousing, and he just had to get off. That's all there is to it. Give the man what he needs and enjoy it at the same time, or find someone else, imo =/ .
Chicago66
Bluelighter
EVERY guy will fantasize about someone else when they're with you. No matter what they say.
It's not because the person in the fantasy is better or hotter or whatever, It's because guys love to fantasize. I have had sexual fantasies about people I would never even want to talk to. I just thought they were good looking.
It's probably not as deep and complex as you're thinking, but I don't know what's in your guys head so I have no idea. The only way to really know is to ask and hope for the best.
good luck.
It's not because the person in the fantasy is better or hotter or whatever, It's because guys love to fantasize. I have had sexual fantasies about people I would never even want to talk to. I just thought they were good looking.
It's probably not as deep and complex as you're thinking, but I don't know what's in your guys head so I have no idea. The only way to really know is to ask and hope for the best.
good luck.
wanderer21
Bluelighter
drugfukkdrockstar said:
Recently I asked the stupid question, "what do you fantasize about when you masturbate?" At first his response was, "you baby, all the time." I probably should have taken some reassurance in that statement, but I pressed on not believing him.
It came out that he thinks of all sorts of things. Random times he's spent with previous flings/girlfriends, fantasies that come to him when he's about to beat off, and me most of the time. At first I didn't know how to take hearing all of that. I mean I pressed him for names of people he masturbates to and everything because I had to know. I didn't want to assume.
Truthfully...at first I was upset and confused. But the more I thought about it the more I realized that I think of crazy random things when I masturbate from past partners to just a random thought that comes through my mind. generally when I cum I'm thinking of my man.
In the end...we are completely 100% monogamous...we're both just highly perverted people. If the only thing I have to worry about it my boyfriend reminiscing or fantasizing about some hot chick be it a friend or stranger...I'm happy
to those of you who think this is weird and disrespectful please explain why. masturbation is a beautiful and natural act. sometimes I'm not in the mood when my boyfriend is and he'll masturbate right in front of me...and i do the same other times. It's prolly a lil embarassing to catch someone or be caught, but its not weird. maybe he wasn't going at it for 20 minutes...maybe he'd just started. ever stop to think that it was the outfit of the girl not the girl herself...or maybe he was looking at her and thinking 3some with u. maybe he saw some of your panties in your room and got turned on, or your smell lingered. he might have even had some other web site up on the screen altogether and clicked it off just before you walked in and her picture was left on the screen. don't be so quick to judge! Like you haven't done something perverted before....
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drugfukkdrockstar
Bluelight Crew
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- Jun 18, 2003
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- 9,822
We all can do perverted things, but there is a time and a place and i certainly wouldn't do it knowing my boyfriend could walk in any minute and catch me.
What you are talking about is quite different to what this thread is about. Of course it's harmless to fantasize about whatever and whoever, but in this discussion we are talking about him beating off to her friends picture as soon as she left the room. I find it rude and disgusting. I am aware my boyfriend probably fantasizes about other people here and there rather than just me. It's one thing to know it and understand it due to maturity, but it's another to catch them doing it. If i caught my boyfriend beating off to a picture of a good friend of mine, i think that would cause a huge rift in our relationship. It's a mental image that no one deserves to have IMO.
And if you ask me, asking what your partner thinks about when they masturbate is a bit unfair. That's their fantasy and should be kept to themselves. It only causes issues to talk about it, and i feel that kind of thing should be kept to the individual. I feel everyone has a right to their privacy when it comes to that.
What you are talking about is quite different to what this thread is about. Of course it's harmless to fantasize about whatever and whoever, but in this discussion we are talking about him beating off to her friends picture as soon as she left the room. I find it rude and disgusting. I am aware my boyfriend probably fantasizes about other people here and there rather than just me. It's one thing to know it and understand it due to maturity, but it's another to catch them doing it. If i caught my boyfriend beating off to a picture of a good friend of mine, i think that would cause a huge rift in our relationship. It's a mental image that no one deserves to have IMO.
And if you ask me, asking what your partner thinks about when they masturbate is a bit unfair. That's their fantasy and should be kept to themselves. It only causes issues to talk about it, and i feel that kind of thing should be kept to the individual. I feel everyone has a right to their privacy when it comes to that.
threelibras99
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 20, 2005
- Messages
- 897
drugfukkdrockstar said:
That's exactly what it would be for me. I would never feel comfortable hanging out with both people at the same time again, or even knowing that they are alone together because apparently she's hot enough to get him off. It was just very rude of him to be doing that at a time when his girlfriend was coming back into the room just a few minutes later.
wanderer21
Bluelighter
not to derail the thread but I wanted to respond to you drugfuk. My bf and I talk about everything together even when it's uncomfortable. our talk about his fantasies and in turn my fantasies has made us closer and the sex life has heated up.
About this situation...like I said how do we know he immediately started beating off to the pic? I've masturbated alone in my boyfriend's room when he's left for awhile. She went to the library for 20 minutes. I seriously doubt that he was masturbating for 20 minutes and still hadn't orgasmed.
Guess my point is that what does it matter what people think about or look at when they masturbate. You know if you are in a solid relationship. When you are, you have a constant feeling of security even in a crappy situation like this one.
About this situation...like I said how do we know he immediately started beating off to the pic? I've masturbated alone in my boyfriend's room when he's left for awhile. She went to the library for 20 minutes. I seriously doubt that he was masturbating for 20 minutes and still hadn't orgasmed.
Guess my point is that what does it matter what people think about or look at when they masturbate. You know if you are in a solid relationship. When you are, you have a constant feeling of security even in a crappy situation like this one.
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airforlife
Bluelighter
wow some of you people are weird.
people beat it to the weirdest stuff, you don't even know the half of it. you just happened to walk in on a guy's private time, which is definitely not the place you should be. who he wacks it to is really none of your business, seriously, you're not married. it could have been carmen electra on the screen for all intents and purposes, who he was beating it to is unimportant.
the only weird part about this situation is that he was dumb enough to get caught lol. i don't know about anyone else but if i was going to do that i would be 100% positive i wouldn't be walked in on.
but, he was dumb and he did get caught. you have a right to be upset, but you can't really be mad at him in all fairness, ESPECIALLY if you are depriving him of sex.
wanking is sooooo not a big deal, whatever anyone else says is hogwash.
people beat it to the weirdest stuff, you don't even know the half of it. you just happened to walk in on a guy's private time, which is definitely not the place you should be. who he wacks it to is really none of your business, seriously, you're not married. it could have been carmen electra on the screen for all intents and purposes, who he was beating it to is unimportant.
the only weird part about this situation is that he was dumb enough to get caught lol. i don't know about anyone else but if i was going to do that i would be 100% positive i wouldn't be walked in on.
but, he was dumb and he did get caught. you have a right to be upset, but you can't really be mad at him in all fairness, ESPECIALLY if you are depriving him of sex.
wanking is sooooo not a big deal, whatever anyone else says is hogwash.
Pillthrill
Bluelighter
That big of deal? I don't think so. Your guy or any guy won't think of you ALL the time. Yeah a lil different when its your BFF, and it can make your worry that there might be some feelings and crap there that bother you...but its not life he is ACTING on that and cheating.
The_Idler
Bluelighter
IAmTheWalrus said:
ummmno