• Trip Reports Moderator: M!$ter-ED

Bromo Dragonfly & DPT. 1st Time. A SERIOUS VIDEO depicting 2 Interrelated Experiences

I'm explaining where all of my self destruction was stemming from. But I needed to realize that I cannot rely on other people to save me--only I can save myself. Get it now?
 
Hmm... the amount of psy's you appear to be consuming, I guess walking the crazy streets of Tokyo at night is more fun than being indoors in a cramped apartment.

When I lived in Tokyo, I soon realised I didn't want to stay there forever. I'm kinda "homey" and whereas where I am now there is perhaps too little goin on outside sometimes, inside it's all nicer.

Wish I had both worlds... a nice private space and midnight madness right at my doorstep ;) Oh well!
 
Tokyo is a very, very dense and unique place. When I want privacy, I have to buy it. I cannot just go out and venture into the wilderness or the beach and have my own time to myself. I kind of miss that nature, but it's precisely after not having it that you truly begin to appreciate the life that was once around you. Hence my inspiration for the new artwork I created.

Hell, even when I BUY privacy, chances are, there is still SOMEBODY around watching me. Especially in a high tech place like Tokyo, you are never safe, you always have to start from the position that you are being watched somewhere--at any store, at any room, at any intersection, even at any bathroom stall. This is not paranoia either, it's no fucking joke what goes on out here. I would get into the whole story about it all but that's gonna be saved for another day.
 
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Aaah, I remember toking some 'shabu' (meth) off some tinfoil inside a bloody metro station on my way to Roppongi one day, cameras amd all.... I know what you mean about the privacy, but then I found Tokyo to be VERY safe apart from that - risk of being attacked / robbed / ... is WAY smaller than in Europe. Oh, and as a gaijin I found I had a certain freedom in such a big place, because I was not part of 'the game' anyway and couldn't have been part of it even if I had tried. THAT was cool. I wonder how I'd feel in the Japanese countryside though... I remember this day my wife and I were staying at soem mountainside onsen ryokan and some guy accidentally opened our hotel room door and said "Oh Gomen" (Sorry!) when he saw me sitting there . . . and entered the room netx door to report a "Gaijin!" to his fellow room occupants ... ah, memories. Way off topic but the pics you took stir them up.

Regarding some zen or any other meditation techniques - go for it, itmight be just what you are looking for. Of course, those techniques, too, are just a path and not a destination.

It's crazy, how can I be attracted to the calm of a zen temple whilst craving a wild shabu'd or methyloned-up night in Hide-Out or Club Yellow or whatever! Probably for the same reasons that people mix uppers and downers. But I am digressing more and more.
 
Psychubus said:
. They had a big drug bust there
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/\ even more off-topic but anyway let me ask:
how do drug busts work in Japan?
They just sort of storm into the place and close the exits and turn off the music and search everyone?
Or is it like in Thailand, where they do piss tests on the spot, and if you're positive you have to pray for your freedom?

Regarding MGS's post just above - he has a point there... I remember your frantic meth posts... and I remember how many BL posters suggested you may want to get into psychedelics in order to help you see your way through the meth jungle.... be careful and make sure you are not now using psychedelics too frequently (it seems that you you may be doing this!) and as a replacement for your meth binges, to first feel great and then "get fucked up", so to speak. Especially the psychedelic amphetamines like DOC . . . I can imagine tolerance building like crazy, and it's quite a speedy buzz after all. Be careful. Many a beautiful soul has been fried on psychedelics, at least temporarily. I know what I am talking about, because too much LSD too often did this to me at the time.
 
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there may be no way of saying this without having you throw the "you're biased against me" line again, but don't post in this forum with that KEKEBGAGHSA crap, that shit stays in the lounge.

other than that, the report is one of your better ones :)
 
trip.more said:
I would have liked to see you on DPT
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Def.

Give us a straight, uncut vid of you sucking up 100mg DPT. Just try not to break the camera!
 
Intoxo said:
If your art takes only an instant to create it isn't worth anything. You need to invest time and effort into creating something worthwhile.
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tell william blake. or william burroughs for that matter.

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not an endorsement, just an observation. because i love didactic drug abusers. especially the ones on the internet.
 
Yeah. Junkies that like writing about little boys fucking each other up the arsehole after shooting up home bake codiene using a knife and a pen tube under a bridge is art..... 8)
 
If Burroughs' work isn't art, then what is? Maybe the kitschy seaside town paintings that one can buy as a souvenir and hang on the livjng room wall to lighten up the atmosphere back home? Burroughs' work may well, at times, deserve adjectives like "appalling" or "repulsive" but in my book it is art, wheras the the kitsch painting I just mentioned is not. But I guess discussing the nature of art, trying to define it, would be going beyond the scope of this thread.
 
i left my ego at the station, now where did my ego go go, thass right, it seems that it was i who missed the boat after all..
 
Fuck all this negative shit, psychubus has posted more readable stuff than many many others on bluelight !
Anyone has the right to express themselves as they wish, one can just walk on by if you do not like it !
Seems like a boys club who doesn't want an asian member !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe, maybe not, but look at the reactions what conclusions can you draw ?
 
Zophen, I doubt it's got much to do with her ethnicity or cultural background. She does have a knack for writing, and attimes she does appear to have great insight, much like many of us, and she has a great way of using words to convey it. But there is an element of tabloid-style sensationalism to her writing that many of us, perhaps due to our age, have moved away from on our paths to ever-elusive salvation. Perhaps those of us who feel the need to ridicule her are ridiculing an aspect of themselves, I dunno. I certainly suffer from my powerful ego that sometimes makes me wanna wind people up... so that they can grow, my ego tells me. But sometimes I feel my ego just wants to set me apart from such ego-ridden people, and as a result then I am not exactly much better. Though my ego, shameless, thinks it is better than "that ego over there" which is so obviously attention-whoring. There are ways, and there are ways. My ego is victim to its own ways and I am a victim of my ego... most of us require some sort of self-validation, and posting on BL what we think and feel or want others to believe we think and feel and getting positive responses that resonate with our thinking or any responses that we may be asking for is a fine way of collecting somepoints in the self-validation department of the ego. But I'll shut up, I think it's my ego trying to teach ye ;)

I also wonder to what extent her videos contribute to the speeding up of the scheduling of the substances they are related to. That cannot be in anyone's interest who posts here on these boards.
 
Splatt said:
Yeah. Junkies that like writing about little boys fucking each other up the arsehole after shooting up home bake codiene using a knife and a pen tube under a bridge is art..... 8)
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Art is not about creating only beauty. It is about expressing emotion--which includes disgust, shock, or repulsion. If it has the ability to instigate that sort of reaction in somebody, it is a work of art.

Maybe you don't understand art. "life is BEEYOOTEEFUL!" %)
 
Psychubus said:
Art is not about creating only beauty. It is about expressing emotion--which includes disgust, shock, or repulsion. If it has the ability to instigate that sort of reaction in somebody, it is a work of art.

Maybe you don't understand art. "life is BEEYOOTEEFUL!" %)
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Thanks for the aesthetics 101. 8(
 
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