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Boyfriend Relapsed...Again.

Busty, you seem to be a pretty successful guy. I gotta think that it's easier to avoid drug addiction when your life is going in a positive direction. Growing up in a poor, drug infested neighborhood, living outside of the family home before leaving grade school, etc, all are risk factors you have to consider before blasting people for making bad decisions.
 
Plenty more poor people don't turn to drugs, just as many silver spoon idiots get addicted. Excuses are excuse no matter what your bank balance (or parent's) is.
 
Update: I continued having suspicions about my boyfriend's behavior and drug use, so this past weekend I went through his phone. Spare me the comments about going through someone's property. I confirmed that he is in fact buying and using Xanax and Klonopin.

I told him last time that if I found out he was buying, selling, trading, using drugs of any kind, it would be over. It's over now. We have been together for almost 2.5 years, and have been friends for 4 years before that; what I thought was the most important relationship in my life is crumbling before my eyes.

We have an apartment that we have to figure out what to do with, as well as dozens of mutual friends and hangouts. I love this person so much but I have finally realized that our relationship cannot progress any farther if my partner is constantly lying to my face and doing things behind my back.

This thread has gone in a different direction than I imagined it would, but the opinions and information expressed are all valid. I appreciate the nice thoughts, but please leave out any further negative opinions about how I handled the situation, or about dealing with addicts - I did what I think is best for my own well being.

Thanks, BL <3
 
Sorry queenbee, that really sucks. Sorry you had to find out the hard way. No bitchiness from me for how you did it. Sometimes, the only way to find out the truth is to snoop, but usually you find out what you really knew all along, and you find the brutal truth of it and it hurts.

Sorry. Good luck, and we're here if you need to vent.
 
@QueenBee, all apologies IF you feel that I derailed your thread, I certainly did not intend to and hopefully you will let me make it up to you by staying on topic.
I am glad for the update, and I am very sorry to hear that you had to end your relationship. As far as "snooping," no judgments here! If he were not behaving suspiciously I doubt you would have felt the need to check out his phone! PEOPLE WITH NOTHING TO HIDE HIDE NOTHING. You are not stupid, and probably got tired of him lying to your face, lying about being high when he was obviously high, sneaking around, missing money, and general deceitfulness. Now you have the truth.

Just so you know (in case you don't) this is NOT. YOUR. FAULT. There is nothing you could have done to alter the course that he is on. Your love was undoubtedly the best thing he had in his life. Alas, addiction is stronger than love. I was absolutely horrified to come to understand this - to come to this realization was to come to grief. When I saw a baby taken away from her mother because her mother would not stop using drugs...I was confronted with the truth about addiction then, the awesome Power of it, a power so strong that a mother will forsake her child(ren) for it.

Please go now, be happy, and above all, be free.
 
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