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Boyfriend hitting me.

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NormaJean9

Greenlighter
Joined
Jun 25, 2011
Messages
4
Well my boyfriend has put his hands on me before, but the severity of it was low so I ignored it. He has pushed and jabbed his nails into my hands. Today, he swung on my arm. We were not in a good mood since I was annoyed from him yelling at me earlier and he is angry because I didn't want to talk to him. He is going through meth withdrawals today because he had no money. He was going crazy and extremely scandalous. He kept banging his head everywhere and making a scene. I was so irritated because I don't him to get in trouble. Out of nowhere, he swings at my arm. I don't know what to do. We've been through alot together. I've forsaken him before but he always took me back, but this, his meth addction has surface this far. He losses himself, and he has a terrible anger problem. I don't wanna leave because I promise to help him through this time, but my better judgement knows my presence is just a waste. I'm torn on what to do. He hit me now, and he can do more than swinging at my arm next time. I've been with him for a year an six months, sadly, today is our year and six months.
 
Never tolerate any physical abuse. Please. It's not healthy. Not to mention that his addiction problem isn't healthy for you to deal with either. Do yourself a favor and get out. It doesn't matter if you promised him you would help him. You have to look out for yourself first. Good luck with everything.
 
It sounds like you're making excuses for him hitting you such as you saying you guys were in a bad mood. I know you don't mean to but physical abuse is never acceptable. You need to realize that this it not good for you and that you should get out of this situation before it gets worse. He's going to beg for you not to go and say that he's going to try but that's what they all say. He is slowly working his way up the latter until one day he beats you into a pulp... I seen this happen too many times especially growing up with an abusive father...seeing him choke my mother and everything else. You just need to get out now. It's going to be hard but you cannot change him. Especially when he has a meth addiction...this situation is not going to get any better.
 
Get out!
My current bf hits me if he is high or drunk but like just very hard slaps. Though he stopped now ;)
Most guys dont stop though so I would leave.
 
^ heerrre kitty kitty :) i just had to .. thats my user name for some other accounts :)

but anyways NO ONE SHOULD TAKE ABUSE FROM ANYONE !!!!!!!!! not even your own parents everything can be solved by discussing the situation like adults

op honest to shit
your relationship sounds like a mess , meth and an abusive b/f sounds like a HUGE RECIPE FOR DISASTER !!
please dont come on bluelight to seek advise and then try to justify yourself and your abusive boyfriend the bl'ers will just basically ignore your post .

what he is doing is wrong , you can not change him , and you should leave that is what everyone will tell you .
 
Do NOT take abuse.
This is way too much for you. I can see how you would give him a second chance after the first time but this is like the third, fourth, etc. time. There is no excuse for it.

You can't change him because you haven't yet. If he was going to change, he should have already.

A year and six months - yeah that's a long time. I understand why you would feel committed to him. But think of it in terms of it is only a year and six months. You have lots of time left. You have lots of time to find someone else. And better only a year and a half then three years ... or five years ... or something like that.

Get out of the relationship asap. It *IS* an abusive relationship.
 
i hate hearing about stuff like this. do not put up with that shit
 
I've noticed most girls would get hit by their bf always make excuse. you should definitely leave, but chances are you won't. also nobody's going to say, yes stay with him, I'm sure that's what you want to hear. But I believe under no circumstances should a guy hit their GF. It's probably better for both of you. If you're making him mad enough that he is hiting you, then if you leave your doing both of you a favor..
 
I don't care if he was abused by both parents and is going through withdrawals from every drug on the planet. NOT YOUR PROBLEM!!!!!!!! If he hits you, it's self-preservation that you get away. He is letting go of inhibitions and capable of doing it again and worse. PLEASE PLEASE get away from this man. I promise you that there a gazillion other men who would make you happy and not hit you. There is NO REASON to ever hit someone. I don't fucking care what your problems are. There is a clear, defined definition between someone who would hit another person and a good man who can't imagine himself laying a hand on his woman. BIG DIFFERENCE. I don't give a shit what the problem is.
 
Sounds like you have battered wife syndrome making excuses for staying with him. He has nothing to offer you as of now. He has many problems it seems & with you staying in the relationship only enables him to think its okay to smack you around because you havent left yet. In his mind, he may think you like getting hit no matter if you tell him to stop.
 
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hrm, sounds like you have an animal on your hands, not an adult male human. would you condone a dogs behavior if it snapped at you and bit you? would you let any animal in your care try to dominate you and force you into physical submission? every time you fail to react, or fail to produce a natural and sincere apology, you condone the behavior and create the master-slave relationship for yourself. would you really allow a new puppy to grow up thinking he is the master and you the pet?

of course not. youd see it properly sanctioned, or properly destroyed*. you symbolically destroy your violently defiant animal by ending the relationship. if you fear physical repercussions, go to the police, and know that person is not capable of loving you, ever, so youre not exactly losing anything of value, and strengthening your self respect.



*note: i do not believe in causing harm to animals :) i am speaking figuratively.
 
rm-rf said:
hrm, sounds like you have an animal on your hands, not an adult male human. would you condone a dogs behavior if it snapped at you and bit you? would you let any animal in your care try to dominate you and force you into physical submission? every time you fail to react, or fail to produce a natural and sincere apology, you condone the behavior and create the master-slave relationship for yourself. would you really allow a new puppy to grow up thinking he is the master and you the pet?

of course not. youd see it properly sanctioned, or properly destroyed*. you symbolically destroy your violently defiant animal by ending the relationship. if you fear physical repercussions, go to the police, and know that person is not capable of loving you, ever, so youre not exactly losing anything of value, and strengthening your self respect.



*note: i do not believe in causing harm to animals :) i am speaking figuratively.
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So true you are seriously not losing anything important, he sounds like a loser anyway
 
I agree with all of these comments.

Tell me where he lives and I'll treat him like the show Bully Beatdown where bullies get a taste of their own medicine. After they do, NONE of them are bullies after their confidence is crushed and they know someone out there can beat them up to. And NONE of the bullies have ever lasted for more then 5 minutes when they bragged about how they would kill anyone.

The guy is a POS and you need to leave now. There are MUCH better people out there that you will probably love more then him.
 
physical abuse, means walking. leaving. there is no excuse.

there are many reasons where you can rationalise the reasons to stay, but at the end of the day there is no excuse
 
Also if you want to break up with him do it with over the phone,
don't do it in person, I know a lot of girls who were beaten badly,
when they broke up with their boyfriends.

One incident I know the guy even crash the car purposely, when she told him.

Especially since he has hit you in the past for no good reason,
I can't imagine what he would do if you do break up.

Specially those guys that beat their girlfriends when they broke up, never done it in the relationship.
 
shahab6 said:
Also if you want to break up with him do it with over the phone,
don't do it in person, I know a lot of girls who were beaten badly,
when they broke up with their boyfriends.

One incident I know the guy even crash the car purposely, when she told him.

Especially since he has hit you in the past for no good reason,
I can't imagine what he would do if you do break up.

Specially those guys that beat their girlfriends when they broke up, never done it in the relationship.
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Agreed. This isn't a situation where you have to be polite and do it face to face and everything. Call him and break up with him. That is perfectly fine! I'd encourage it!!
 
NormaJean9 said:
he always took me back
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WTF.

You have the completely wrong perspective on the situation. Don't feel as though you're trapped in this situation. You have the freedom to leave this abusive relationship whenever you so choose. Don't forget that.
 
Any man who hits his partner is not worth the time of day. And vice versa. He obviously thinks his actions are acceptable, and you staying with him will only serve to reinforce that belief. Who knows what he will do next time? You need to dump him - ASAP
 
Any type of physical abuse should be a hit the road sign. One thing I absolutely will not tolerate is when a man puts his hands on a woman. Meth is no joke so maybe you should peace out of the relationship? stay safe!
 
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