doofqueen
Bluelighter
starfalls - i may take you up on that you know so watch out 
reow 
reow 
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AADD Moderators: Tronica
Bluelight Singles thread "Living without justification" Part 2
- Thread starter BREAKaBEAT
- Start date
che_melbourne
Bluelighter
ahem, girls are the ones that keep changing thier minds.... they are irrational at least once a month
Dee
Dee
gher
Bluelighter
This is getting nuts. S and I have been webcam stripping for each other a few times this week. No problems there as far as I'm concerned, but last night she promised me sex if I beat up her ex-boyfriend. I think this comes from the whole 'will only date badboys' thing she has. Meanwhile I'm an (almost) law abiding citizen.
I'm just about ready to give up here. I know I can do better.
Of course if he ever beat her up then that's another story entirely.
I'm just about ready to give up here. I know I can do better.
Of course if he ever beat her up then that's another story entirely.
i think you should forget about her Gher. honestly, if thats what she wants u to do to him, what happenbs if u break up with her, what might she get the next guy to do?
ps. you have a cool name. GHERRRRRRRRRR zim zim zim zim impending doooooooom
ps. you have a cool name. GHERRRRRRRRRR zim zim zim zim impending doooooooom
gher
Bluelighter
It's short for gherkin relish.
She sent me the chat logs and I'm reading them. I've also asked a few of her friends about this guy and they all agree he's got some serious shit coming to him. At this stage I'm not going to do it but I want to know the whole story first. I'm not a violent person anyway.
She sent me the chat logs and I'm reading them. I've also asked a few of her friends about this guy and they all agree he's got some serious shit coming to him. At this stage I'm not going to do it but I want to know the whole story first. I'm not a violent person anyway.
gher
Bluelighter
I know I know, but no one uses it anywhere so I figured I'd claim it for myself. :D Actually I originally used it for my brute characters in Diablo 2 and Baldur's Gate and it kinda stuck.
I've read through the chat logs and I've decided I won't do it. No amount of sex is worth becoming a thug, well for me anyway. I told her to grow up or do it herself. I hope this doesn't mean she's going to ignore me forever, I already have one girl doing that but she lives in another state.
I have an uncanny ability to meet unstable women and become attracted to them.![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
I've read through the chat logs and I've decided I won't do it. No amount of sex is worth becoming a thug, well for me anyway. I told her to grow up or do it herself. I hope this doesn't mean she's going to ignore me forever, I already have one girl doing that but she lives in another state.
I have an uncanny ability to meet unstable women and become attracted to them.
ozbreaker
Bluelighter
Yes well he is going to be at that doof next week taliana. maybe we can all attack him, cover him in honey, tie him to a tree and leave him be devoured by the ants in revenge..
though he'd probably like that!!
though he'd probably like that!!
miss slingshot
Bluelighter
Magpi is just gloating as he's had sex for the first time in how many weeks? Do I have enough fingers to count?
onetwothreefour
Bluelight Crew
i know this is a pretty fluid kind of topic-ed thread, but please let's try not to just turn it into mindless banter.
anyway, i've come to the conclusion that i'm, effectively here forever. i'm twenty years old, and in my entire life i've had two relationships (one which i hated quite passionately, i'm so smart).
in total, there's literally only five people that i've felt were special enough for me to date: one of them i dated and buggered up 'cause i was young (14 or 15) and immature, two of them i was too scared to even approach properly, one of them i approached and she rejected me (possibly *because*) in my fairly inebriated state, and one was kind of a dramatically stupid situation; interstate, taken, better (and crazier) than me, etc.
so, i really have resigned myself to being single. i guess, really, what i actually want is someone to hold, and someone to hold me, who i think is as special as they think i am. not many people think i am, but there's enough. but i just generally don't like people - as i said, five in twenty years - so i think the odds are against me.
it's a vicious circle, as i know that i'm too fussy to find many people that i might fall in love with (not that it's a choice), and there really aren't that many people who are even vaguely interested in me. so i'm fucked: what can i do?
do many other people figure things the same way (i know there are a lot of posts by fussy people like myself - dreamtime immediately comes to mind), or am i destined to be lonely just because i'm too stubborn or idealistic to settle for a half-hearted relationship that i might "settle in to"?
seriously: point of discussion...is it worth being so fussy as to only want to date those people that make you go all fuzzy and nervous and you spend all night thinking about them, or should you settle for someone who's just interesting enough to fill the void that isn't quite love?
or, alternatively, do people actually find it quite easy to find people who make them feel that passion? because i don't...
anyway, that's the topic, go for your lives you similarly (i hope...) desperate singles...
anyway, i've come to the conclusion that i'm, effectively here forever. i'm twenty years old, and in my entire life i've had two relationships (one which i hated quite passionately, i'm so smart).
in total, there's literally only five people that i've felt were special enough for me to date: one of them i dated and buggered up 'cause i was young (14 or 15) and immature, two of them i was too scared to even approach properly, one of them i approached and she rejected me (possibly *because*) in my fairly inebriated state, and one was kind of a dramatically stupid situation; interstate, taken, better (and crazier
) than me, etc.so, i really have resigned myself to being single. i guess, really, what i actually want is someone to hold, and someone to hold me, who i think is as special as they think i am. not many people think i am, but there's enough. but i just generally don't like people - as i said, five in twenty years - so i think the odds are against me.
it's a vicious circle, as i know that i'm too fussy to find many people that i might fall in love with (not that it's a choice), and there really aren't that many people who are even vaguely interested in me. so i'm fucked: what can i do?
do many other people figure things the same way (i know there are a lot of posts by fussy people like myself - dreamtime immediately comes to mind), or am i destined to be lonely just because i'm too stubborn or idealistic to settle for a half-hearted relationship that i might "settle in to"?
seriously: point of discussion...is it worth being so fussy as to only want to date those people that make you go all fuzzy and nervous and you spend all night thinking about them, or should you settle for someone who's just interesting enough to fill the void that isn't quite love?
or, alternatively, do people actually find it quite easy to find people who make them feel that passion? because i don't...
anyway, that's the topic, go for your lives you similarly (i hope...) desperate singles...
gher
Bluelighter
1234: I must be the opposite then, except I've only made as much progress as you. If you can't tell from my last few posts, my standards must be too low if I'm going after girls who have no intention of going out with me. Ok, maybe one or two dates, which is all I really expect from them anyway. But still, I know I can do better, I just don't.
Based on the girls I've dated in the last few months, yes it is worth being fussy and waiting, but in the meantime, what the hell! Fill in the void that isn't quite love, because it won't be filled for that long.
Oh and my most recent dig isn't ignoring me forever, I called her up to make sure we're still cool and we are. Which is more than I can say for my previous dig, I haven't seen her since our date, it's real hard getting her on the phone and I'm still holding onto her birthday present! I've practically given up getting it to her but I don't know anyone else it suits.
Any gals here smoke copious amounts of pot?
Based on the girls I've dated in the last few months, yes it is worth being fussy and waiting, but in the meantime, what the hell! Fill in the void that isn't quite love, because it won't be filled for that long.
Oh and my most recent dig isn't ignoring me forever, I called her up to make sure we're still cool and we are. Which is more than I can say for my previous dig, I haven't seen her since our date, it's real hard getting her on the phone and I'm still holding onto her birthday present! I've practically given up getting it to her but I don't know anyone else it suits.
Any gals here smoke copious amounts of pot?
doofqueen
Bluelighter
^^ you provide the weed and i'll smoke copious amounts of it hehehe
Well i don't think i have any trust left in me when it comes to men after what the last one did to me and i'm a pretty trusting person (which is maybe why people keep shitting on me and taking advantage of that) but i always refused to let past hurts and mis trusts get the better of me and not take that to the next relationship and judge people on an individual scale and how *I* connect to them but i've just had about enough of giving everything i have and being passinate about everything i do and nothing ever comes out of it.
It's women or no one from now on. I know not all men are dogs (and all my male friends aren't but their 'mates' and once it's past a ceratin level you can't take it to the next level - which is a shame because i fall for people most when i get to know them hence falling for my mates all the time) but i've had a bad run on me who won't give me what i want emotionally (wether i know i want it or not) so that's it for me.
I'VE HAD ENOUGH!
hehehe Well i don't think i have any trust left in me when it comes to men after what the last one did to me and i'm a pretty trusting person (which is maybe why people keep shitting on me and taking advantage of that) but i always refused to let past hurts and mis trusts get the better of me and not take that to the next relationship and judge people on an individual scale and how *I* connect to them but i've just had about enough of giving everything i have and being passinate about everything i do and nothing ever comes out of it.
It's women or no one from now on. I know not all men are dogs (and all my male friends aren't but their 'mates' and once it's past a ceratin level you can't take it to the next level - which is a shame because i fall for people most when i get to know them hence falling for my mates all the time) but i've had a bad run on me who won't give me what i want emotionally (wether i know i want it or not) so that's it for me.
I'VE HAD ENOUGH!
funluvingurl
Bluelighter
1234:
You're only 20. Take a chill pill would ya? Are you honestly looking for the love of your life now?? (Note, I am pessimistic - but whether you are or you are not, you've got years!!!)
My plan is to build up the worlds best porn collection to tide me over in the lonely years until I hit 30. Then I'll sit down and reassess the situation.
I think you need to love yourself more. I want to elaborate on this sentence but can't find the right words. Something along the lines of self assured/older/wiser/confident.meh.
I think its totally worth being fussy. You say should you be with someone who just fills the void... Could you actually do that? I know I couldn't. Besides you'd probably just end up hurting the other person because I'm sure they'd realise that you weren't completely into them.
I find people who make me think about them all night, about once a year, and I usually fall way too deep into the situation. I think I'm too passionate a person. If only to be more level headed.
Someone asked me the other day to define happiness. So I thought about it and came up with stuff like contentment, loving someone, knowing they love you, purpose....there were others [can't think, what is up with my brain this morning??] But yeah, I thought that all my words could be linked back to being in a relationship or likewise, not as well.
I'm too fragile right now for someone else, and I'm cool with that.
did I say porn?
You're only 20. Take a chill pill would ya? Are you honestly looking for the love of your life now?? (Note, I am pessimistic - but whether you are or you are not, you've got years!!!)
My plan is to build up the worlds best porn collection to tide me over in the lonely years until I hit 30. Then I'll sit down and reassess the situation.
I think you need to love yourself more. I want to elaborate on this sentence but can't find the right words. Something along the lines of self assured/older/wiser/confident.meh.
I think its totally worth being fussy. You say should you be with someone who just fills the void... Could you actually do that? I know I couldn't. Besides you'd probably just end up hurting the other person because I'm sure they'd realise that you weren't completely into them.
I find people who make me think about them all night, about once a year, and I usually fall way too deep into the situation. I think I'm too passionate a person. If only to be more level headed.
Someone asked me the other day to define happiness. So I thought about it and came up with stuff like contentment, loving someone, knowing they love you, purpose....there were others [can't think, what is up with my brain this morning??] But yeah, I thought that all my words could be linked back to being in a relationship or likewise, not as well.
I'm too fragile right now for someone else, and I'm cool with that.
did I say porn?
onetwothreefour
Bluelight Crew
hehe, it wasn't meant to be anywhere near as whingey as that. i'm actually not, generally, all that upset with the position i'm in anymore. i'd love something to come along, but i'm no longer depressed about it (just life now ).
and yes, porn. porn is always the solution :D
).and yes, porn. porn is always the solution :D
Adikkal
Bluelighter
1234, Funluvngirl said it... you have to learn to love yourself. From what i see in your posts, your biggest problem is that you have no self-esteem. The fact that you are talking about 'filling that void' implies that you are feeling like you are really missing something in your life and that it would all be fixed if you found that right person. This is a dependant frame of mind.
By this i mean, you are looking for OTHERS to make yourself feel happy. It's like you can't be truly happy in yourself and you think that finding someone you connect with will make it all ok. It won't. It will just make you forget your feelings of inadequacy until that person goes away. So my advice is to start taking control of your own life! Think about it, i mean.. really think about it. Attracting women doesn't just come down to chance and luck, you CAN do things to make yourself more attractive and i'm not talking just about the way you look. Take control! I'm talking about the way you behave, the way you think, your attitude towards relationships. These things are easily within your control to change and will let you expand to a happier state of mind. Wouldn't it be great to be rid of that 'void' because you don't feel like you NEED a girl? Neediness/desperation is unnatractive and its as simple as that. The less you start worrying about having a girl the easier it will be to get one.
I am firm in these beliefs because i have seen first hand how it works. Dude, i have been in that state of mind, trust me. I got whipped and fucked around by a girl i was in love with. We had that amazing connection and it emotionally drained me for about a yr. Coming out of that was hard, coming back to reality, coming back from that connection. I felt like i'd never have somethin that close again and as i write this, i still haven't. The reason is these connections are RARE! But please don't waste your time waiting for another one of those connections because you'll be waiting a long fucking time. Have fun, casual relationships, hang out with chicks, just have a good time in general. Who cares if she's not you soulmate?!? If you enjoy her company and have fun together then take it for what it is, enjoy that in the meantime because the more you are out there meeting new women the more chance you will have of finding that connection again. Don't leave it up to luck and chance, take control!
Adikkal
By this i mean, you are looking for OTHERS to make yourself feel happy. It's like you can't be truly happy in yourself and you think that finding someone you connect with will make it all ok. It won't. It will just make you forget your feelings of inadequacy until that person goes away. So my advice is to start taking control of your own life! Think about it, i mean.. really think about it. Attracting women doesn't just come down to chance and luck, you CAN do things to make yourself more attractive and i'm not talking just about the way you look. Take control! I'm talking about the way you behave, the way you think, your attitude towards relationships. These things are easily within your control to change and will let you expand to a happier state of mind. Wouldn't it be great to be rid of that 'void' because you don't feel like you NEED a girl? Neediness/desperation is unnatractive and its as simple as that. The less you start worrying about having a girl the easier it will be to get one.
I am firm in these beliefs because i have seen first hand how it works. Dude, i have been in that state of mind, trust me. I got whipped and fucked around by a girl i was in love with. We had that amazing connection and it emotionally drained me for about a yr. Coming out of that was hard, coming back to reality, coming back from that connection. I felt like i'd never have somethin that close again and as i write this, i still haven't. The reason is these connections are RARE! But please don't waste your time waiting for another one of those connections because you'll be waiting a long fucking time. Have fun, casual relationships, hang out with chicks, just have a good time in general. Who cares if she's not you soulmate?!? If you enjoy her company and have fun together then take it for what it is, enjoy that in the meantime because the more you are out there meeting new women the more chance you will have of finding that connection again. Don't leave it up to luck and chance, take control!
Adikkal
ozbreaker
Bluelighter
1234. No way should you be giving up now man - you're only 20 - i only started my first proper relationship at 23 and that lasted for 4.5 years.. you've still got so much to discover about yourself and what you want as do the people around you - just chill and enjoy and i'm sure something will happen man. It always does just when you're not expecting it!
It's interesting isnt it? I've recently been thinking along the lines of 'This is what I *think* I want in a girl - but in all honesty IS it? do i really know what I want/need? if you think about it enough it's incredibly frustrating!!
adding to that, 'passion' is all in your head - you at some level ultimately are the only person that can decide to have that passion or not - whether it's a conscious or unconcious decision. then it all gets to be too much. I know of people that have started in a not very passionate relationship but its turned that way.. the act of becoming each others best friends etc made it that way.. it's too much to type and i really should be doing documentation instead of typing this out but i'll try to collect my thoughts and post something more relevant later..
As to my status - i'm single and am going through the whole 'girls are stoopid' stage at the moment (bluelighters excepted )
It's interesting isnt it? I've recently been thinking along the lines of 'This is what I *think* I want in a girl - but in all honesty IS it? do i really know what I want/need? if you think about it enough it's incredibly frustrating!!
adding to that, 'passion' is all in your head - you at some level ultimately are the only person that can decide to have that passion or not - whether it's a conscious or unconcious decision. then it all gets to be too much. I know of people that have started in a not very passionate relationship but its turned that way.. the act of becoming each others best friends etc made it that way.. it's too much to type and i really should be doing documentation instead of typing this out but i'll try to collect my thoughts and post something more relevant later..
As to my status - i'm single and am going through the whole 'girls are stoopid' stage at the moment
(bluelighters excepted )
ozbreaker
Bluelighter
Adikkal annd Funluvingirl have put it so much better than i could. Damn my pathetic command of putting thoughts and ideas succinctly into words unless it's technical documentation or something..