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Bluelight Singles thread "Living without justification" Part 2

funluvingurl said:
I wanna know I keep on being attracted to boys who just don't treat me good enough. The thing is though, at the beginning they treat me lovely, then I get attached, then they don't treat me so good.
The boy I'm seeing was entirely flippant this week, after being a complete sweetheart last week. Apparantly it's because he thinks I'm too good for him, and he needs to sort himself out, and he's got a lot of shit going on thats stressing him out. I just feel like he's trying to push me away.

I guess I'm just shitty because we were supposed to hang out today but I can't get hold of him. Maybe he's got no credit, maybe he's still asleep, but goddammit, a little bit of thought would be nice.
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Funluvingirl... he's playing a control game with you. You can continue thinking that you'll change him or convince him that you're not too good for him but why bother? It's a game that can continue for a loooooong time and in the end, it won't be worth it cause all he will have proved is that he can hook you in. Move on now and find somebody who treats you like you should be treated. Ultimately you'll be happier once you remove yourself from that crap and even if it's hard not having something around, you need to remember that you're worth more than that... he's got you on call now... Hmmm... that sounded a little too feminist for me but you get the point
:)
 
Are single people heaps more fun than your friends who are in a relationship? I am sick to death of all my friends who are virtually "married with 2.3 kids". I can't get any life out of them at all.

Fuck that shit. I really am happy to be single right now.
 
I'm not happy about being single...

Last time I had a gf, was when my best mates had gf's.

Our gf's were best mates with each other as well, so we all hanged out with each other and had some great times together...I miss them :(
 
<3

Originally posted by nickyj
Are single people heaps more fun than your friends who are in a relationship?

^Not all of us lose any sense of fun or spontaneity.

I blame my current bout of stay-at-home-itus on my severely awful financial situation.
And the fact I'm on a detox. mission with my boy. :|

-=Sneaks out of thread quietly=-
 
nickyj said:
Are single people heaps more fun than your friends who are in a relationship? I am sick to death of all my friends who are virtually "married with 2.3 kids". I can't get any life out of them at all.

Fuck that shit. I really am happy to be single right now.
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When I was in a relationship, I had this problem where by everytime a friend asked me to do somthin when I was in Melbourne, the first thing that came to my head was my bf. This could have been because for most of the weekdays, I didn't get to see him and when I do, I'm literally dependent on him - transport and accomodation, hence I felt bad asking him to bring me to places, or even for me to go places since I was staying with him. I don't know what I'll call it but for me it was just that because I was so dependent on him. In a sense, I think, when people are single, they tend to not care too much, they don't have to think about another person, about what they might think, so hence they are free to make any decisions they want to make, however in saying this, it doesn't apply to every couple. I have a friend who since she's got a bf, I have not really seen her at all because she is literally devoted to her, where as I have friends whereby, the gurl and the guy have lives so separate...
 
dancefifi said:
... they are free to make any decisions they want to make, however in saying this, it doesn't apply to every couple. I have a friend who since she's got a bf, I have not really seen her at all because she is literally devoted to her, where as I have friends whereby, the gurl and the guy have lives so separate...
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It's a choice. Some couples choose to hide themselves away whilst others still manage to have fun with their friends.... [oooh... I think I heard a little bitterness there ;) ] Seriously though, I don't blame any couples who want to take time out for themselves but I think there's a happy medium.

Why is though that some people hide away after falling into a relationship? Were they just with their friends to chase... are they not happy with themselves when they're alone? If that's the case... isn't that a little scary? :\ Part of the fun of being single is learning more about what makes you and those around you tick.
 
MistressNerf said:
oooh... I think I heard a little bitterness there ;)
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she was a very good friend, that along with other things ended our friendship.... :\

Why is though that some people hide away after falling into a relationship? Were they just with their friends to chase... are they not happy with themselves when they're alone? If that's the case... isn't that a little scary? :\ Part of the fun of being single is learning more about what makes you and those around you tick.
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I don't think everyone can be so independent to be happy alone. I've just got out of a relationship not too long ago and without my friends around, I feel very empty. It's much better now, I am starting to enjoy time alone, doing things alone. However I know that there is still that dependence, like I would much prefer to be around my friends. To me, everyone handles singledom very differently and some are happy with it whilst others are miserable... I won't say I'm very very happy but then again, I'm not miserable. i've realised that I've got so much free time on my hands, I don't have to worry too much about not spending enough time with that special someone, and all that kind of worries. Yet at the same time, to be really alone, it can get depressing for me, at times...
 
its very hard to generalise that scenario (people in relationships being more boring...)

if you have an outgoing friend who is being suffocated by their partner, then, yes, they become boring...

but, i have had a number of quiet friends who suddenly find so much more confidence once they realise that someone loves them for who they are...

me? yeah, i become more boring when i am in a relationship..
 
up all night said:
The funny thing is, out of all the people I actually like on Bluelight... they're all in this thread.

Go figure.
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i can think of a few that aint in this thread, or maybe you dont really like us... 8o
 
nickyj said:
Are single people heaps more fun than your friends who are in a relationship? I am sick to death of all my friends who are virtually "married with 2.3 kids". I can't get any life out of them at all.

Fuck that shit. I really am happy to be single right now.
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I used to think like that as well, until i found myself a boy. It was then that i realised that i could be happy sitting at home because it wasn't merely a matter of watching TV, it was a matter of spending time with someon i loved.

We still went clubbing, but we didn't feel the need to do it all the time. We could have just as much fun gardening, or having a BBQ. There's no need to go out every weekend, and sometimes glubbing every weekend can become as monotonous as doing "nothing" all the time.

I can see what you're saying, but i think that if the boot was on the other foot you possibly wouldn't think the way you do. :)
 
haha Tali it was a gross generalisation. Maybe I should have said a large proportion of the people I like are single. <3

I'm going to post in this thread when I'm not drunk for once.

The majority of people who are in a relationship I find do become slightly more boring for a few reasons. They usually start spending more time away from the group, they don't act quite so crazy because they have a partner to think about, they're happier sitting at home enjoying their partners company and don't need to go out so much etc etc It doesn't mean they stop going out completely but it's inevitable.

From my point of view, as CM said, I'm happier now to sit at home and do 'nothing' sometimes because I've got someone to do 'nothing' with. When I go out my nights are different because when I was single I just got really hammered and would run around meeting new people all night but now I don't do that as much because I'm happier to stick with the company I have.

The only time I think all of this is a bad thing is when someone ditches their friends completely.
 
Can ALL the people in a relationship please get out of this thread:-


NOW!!!!!!!!!!! :p eg: Gabz,he,he,he,he,he........................ ;)
 
Cosmic Mist said:

I can see what you're saying, but i think that if the boot was on the other foot you possibly wouldn't think the way you do. :)
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Altho its been a while I still remember what I was like when I had a gf. I did spend a little less time with my friends obviously because there is only so many hours in the day. But the way my friends are now, its fucking ridiculous. Sometimes its like I might as well not have any friends. Good thing I've got BL;)
 
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