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Bluelight Singles - from begining to end! don't we love the merge feature!

Single for what? 1.5 yrs now.

I think I have forgotten how to flirt.

:)

Is that possible?

Peace
wHiTeBoY
 
^^^
I don't think it would take much to remind you - all you need to do is add the suttle leg touching thing to your already emphatic speech and you're there ;)

as for the love over distance thing - my very first love i met at a concert. We met up a few times in the week that followed and got to know each other better. Then she told me she lived in melbourne. What followed? An 8 month relationship.

I believe that love can endure those sorts of boundaries, although i don't recommend it. :\ It was great whilst it lasted, but not being with each other for months on end sucks the big one...

I'll tell you what sucks - finding someone special, to whom you are attracted and whom you love dearly, but knowing that you only have 2 years with before you go away on uni exchange for a year. I know two years sounds like a lot, but whenyou can see yourself with him for much longer, it's a bit saddening. :(

My philosophy? Enjoy it whilst you can. There's no point in whingeing about something you can't change - you're best off having fun in your life. Besides, people are attracted to happy confident fun people... would you want to be with someone who was depressed, mopey, and lacked confidence? I know i wouldn't.
 
Cosmic Mist said:


... would you want to be with someone who was depressed, mopey, and lacked confidence? I know i wouldn't.
Click to expand...

hehe, sometimes it works that way... i have a friend, who is exactly that person u just portrayed, and people are attracted to her for that reason, because they WANT to help.
 
wouldn't you know it...

i meet the most amazing girl on the internet... we have so much in common its not funny, but not too much in common, she is too good to be true, she likes arthouse cinema, poetry, art, music, history. she has a dark side too which is a real turn-on. she loves philosophy and is very intelligent, and to top it all off she is absolutely beautiful... and she likes me too...

but she lives in Perth!!! :(

my mind is numb, i can't think straight... i think i'm gonna die.

love is absolute torture, but i just can't stop.

all the girls i meet who i have the feeling about seem to be out of reach... why do i have to be denied for so long? i'm absolutely love-sick... its terrible! :(

WHY!?!?!?!?!?!?!

WHY!?!?!?!?!?!?!

WHY!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Cohaa.
 
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^^^ Cohaagen, i don't mean to be harsh, but have you met this girl yet?? How long have you known her?? The internet is a great way of breaking the ice between people, but until you've really met someone, you really can't judge a person online.

I'll wait for your reply before i go on with this one....

DJC*
 
DJC* said:
^^^ Cohaagen, i don't mean to be harsh, but have you met this girl yet?? How long have you known her?? The internet is a great way of breaking the ice between people, but until you've really met someone, you really can't judge a person online.

I'll wait for your reply before i go on with this one....

DJC*
Click to expand...

i've known her for about a week, we've spoken on the internet and on the phone for many many hours... we've exchanged lots of pictures. i haven't met her in person... so maybe you are right that i shouldn't rush into things.

be that as it may... the deed is done... i told her i think i'm in love with her.

she said "wow, i've never been loved before"

then she told me she felt the same way about me.

a wave of relief rushed over me. it had to be said.

whatever happens now, at least i've been true to the way i feel. :)

Cohaa.
 
uhh i really hate to burst your bubble but what the hell are you thinking? She could be anyone or anything or just some bitch out playing a game on you. It is the internet after all.

Let me get this straight:

* You've known her for a week
* You've never met her so you have no idea if there's any chemisty there
* You've seen pictures exchanged over the net who really could be of anyone
* You've talked to her on the phone - and you're not wary of someone who gives out their number over the net so quickly?

And you call this love? Worse yet, you believe her when she says the same?

I thought the believe in fairy-tales was beat out of kids by the time they hit 15.

Take a step back and actually think before you get caught up in this fantasy alright, i'd hate to see you pay for the flights to perth only to find out she's a 13 year old who's been using her older sister's photo and the cops are ready to pick you up and charge you.

The net is great and I'm sure everyone has been suckered in at one time or other but honey the true love stories are few and far inbetween and the assholes are too wide and varied to number. Don't be totally innocent about this, we don't want to have to read next week that you're eating your heart out over this girl (that you've never met) and she turns out to be some psycho.
 
^^^^

Listen to the Kitty, she speaks the truth!

Not saying that it can't work, but dude you gotta give it more time than a week - be careful!
 
^^^ Kitty, you are totally right.

The way i was churning up inside needed to be fixed. Now i've told her how i feel i am feeling better. If nothing comes of it, then so be it, but i felt that i had to say what i had to say.

Cohaa.
 
Well, I met my first serious bf over the internet and we were together for 3yrs.. So, I hate to burst your bubbles but there are infact some seriously genuine people online... or are all of you 13yr olds playing games?

Ofcourse you cant expect to know everything about someone before you have met them fully IRL, but in my opinion I find it preferrable to be attracted to someone's personality portrayed via text than just by their looks. I've been on the internet for far too long and I have met a lot of people via there.. yes there are some dickhead 13yr olds out there, but most of them are more interested in pretending to be females and trying to get guys to have cybersex with them :).

But hey.. I'm a complete loser when it comes to online romance. I married someone online in #chapel on austnet (I still have the log ;)). It is possible to meet someone and fall in love with them online.. and its also possible to then meet them and still be in love with them. I say never give up hope.

On my own front.. I'm gonna be in sydney next weekend drinking too much beer with some sexy 21yr olds, and half of them have gf's.... I'm so going to get myself into trouble :\.. Other than that, I'm feeling FINE.

stace.
 
cohagen, i wish you luck. Ive met lots of girls of the net. some in chat rooms, some via sites. 2 things...ive found the ones that have had great personality and talking skills...those ones who you get along with..there was no physcial attraction. But more importantly after meeting these girls they dropped a big load of baggage on me.

Some of them had miscarriages, some of them had bad childhoods and some of them just were plain nutcases. (and these are girls). Even the ones that i found attractive - they were just had too much baggage for me to handle. So be careful in that sense, but i hope she turns into your princess, i really do.
 
Cohaagen said:
i've known her for about a week, we've spoken on the internet and on the phone for many many hours... we've exchanged lots of pictures. i haven't met her in person... so maybe you are right that i shouldn't rush into things.
be that as it may... the deed is done... i told her i think i'm in love with her.
she said "wow, i've never been loved before"
then she told me she felt the same way about me.
a wave of relief rushed over me. it had to be said.
whatever happens now, at least i've been true to the way i feel. :)
Cohaa.
Click to expand...

Cohaagen: You've been taken to task about this already, so I won't harp on it. I'll simply say on this matter, in my opinion, what you're doing is headed for failure and My God boy, it's written in huge fucking painted letters all over your forehead (and her's by the way). But as you've said previously, experience is the best teacher. You're about to get a decent serving of exactly that.

But instead of all that condemnation, I want to give you some more practical, far reaching advice. Reading about your various troubles in all sorts of posts here on BL and trying to understand your motivations, I must admit I've been perplexed. At first I thought you may be 16 or 17 years old, a very inexperienced country boy perhaps, just getting out and beginning to see the world. I thought you were a lightwweight, maybe even simple. But then I looked a little deeper: as I say, you've been perplexing me!

Your various posts over the months here on BL have been on far ranging subjects and they've allowed me to perceive just a little more about what makes you tick. What have I found?

1/ You're a good looking, 24 year old boy.
2/ You hold a good job you love, which you do with ease, and are well respected in your field.
3/ You're shy, perhaps a little too quiet upfront and very insecure with women around that you're attracted to.
4/ Your heart is pure, good and pretty strong. You're protecting it from more hurt (I don't know what hurt you originally, but it must have been huge - I don't have time to read EVERYTHING you've contributed to here).
5/ You have a LOT more to offer than you are willing to share freely right now (see #4).
6/ I don't know where your father is, but you are screaming for a little older, manly advice right now. That's where I come in.

See, none of the great qualities I mentioned above makes any sense when I listen to the voice you use in posts, the one for example that is trialling a relationship over the internet, one you say has you 'in love' with a girl you have never layed eyes on before!! Alarm bells are ringing my friend and they are bloody loud! You're either dicking this whole online community around for the joy of the shitstorm you want to bring, or you really ARE clueless about what you have and what you could have?? I'm not sure which, but I'll take a punt and say you're naaively genuine, in which case I have no choice but to try and help you.

ALL your troubles with women, my friend, are a result of the lack of belief you have in yourself. Period. Full stop. Go back and read the first sentence again. Again.

This is you talking, in another thread: "...i'm sorta going thru the same thing now, finding that if i just take a step back and let things flow i seem to find people who are like-minded, rather than making myself fit a mould that i don't really belong in...". Listen to your own advice my friend because just there, you got it exactly right. You've just explained the key to a wholly successful life!!

You don't belong in internet relationships. You don't belong at the bottom, taking scraps. You need to stay strong in yourself, recognise your own worth, and stand firm on the belief that what you offer is more than worthwhile. Christ I believe it and I've never even met you! I don't want to date 'ya, but god knows there is very little wrong with you that any right-minded girl with half a brain couldn't fathom herself, given a decent time to get it (and without any smothering pressure from you)...

Take a step back. Falling in love with someone you have never met is a loser's last option. And that's not you. You're better than this. Start believing it. Somebody has pussy whipped you down to a level you don't belong at (it doesn't matter who - your mother, and ex-girlfriend, who cares?). Get back up here and start punching at your own weight son. You don't belong in the gutter looking up. Mentally take yourself out now and raise your aim, before its too much later.

You're better than this.... Go prove it!.. :)
 
^^^^^ WOW!

i honestly don't know where to start to do anything to respond to that, apart from a big thankyou.

also, everything i post in these groups is sincere, i do not just say something to stir the pot. in life i do my best to be as honest and true with people as possible. sarcasim is not my strong point. but sometimes i do read back over what i post and think "where was i (mentally) when i wrote that?"

Cohaa.
 
Cohaagen,

Ive met u man.. ive hung out with you man. When not on the subject of girls, you have this I am the man attitude, you are so confident and I admire you as a person in the business world.

You are a good looking dude and you are a fun dude to hang around with. You have told me that you have meet some really nice girls from being yourself. Be how u are around me, be confident and assertive, you can have any girl you want because you believe in yourself.

You are cultured and have style, go out meet women, dont cover your insecurities when talking to a girl by giving them the cut throat business rountine tho. Also dont be too full on with the can i get that for you rountine. hehe dont go straight for the kill either... touchy feely stuff..

Your a cool man to chat to you have a good heart, find some middle ground ask them about themselves, make them comfortable around you before you try anything. Dont make them feel belittled when they tell you they are a coffee counter girl :).

I have never seen you try to pick up.. so what I said above might relate or I could have missed the mark. You told me that you were in your, ok now its time to find a girlfriend phase and start enjoying life. I think the problem with a focus like this is you might see it as a goal like in business and go with the hard sell on every girl you meet... dont saturate a girl with your needs.

then again i could be talking bs as i said above.

Yes I am single... but since I have stopped doing all of the above, I have gotten so much more attention and action.

talk to a girl, without thinking I could really settle down with this one. Be nice be charming and wait for her to give u a smile or a sign.

Peace dude
 
firstly, candyflip, that was an *amazing* post - you really have some good advice to dish out...

secondly, cohaa, listen to what everyone's said...they're pretty much all correct. like backo, i've met you, we've talked a fair bit, you're a good guy...there's no need to jump at *any* sign of interest. and i don't mean that to be demeaning, the opposite actually - you've got as much chance with any chick as the rest of us, so don't rush into things so much :)

good luck dude!
 
Well,

If it's of anyones interest, it appears i am departing this thread...

With the previous girl i mentioned, patience was exercised and now we're together. Quite good indeed.

Only one thing, i have a feeling that some day, either with her or with another girl my passion for my music will cause hassles. I am so used to it that i don't realise the importance i place on music in general life.
e.g. lying down in bed with partner and although i am totally wrapped in them i'm still kinda tapping my hands to the beat and listening to the lyrics intently and i have no qualms about leaving this position of calm/comfort to change the music - i feel it enhances the situation and if the music wasn't what i wanted to be hearing, itd have an adverse effect on my mood.

Basically ive said to her already that my love for music is NOT going to change, and if its a problem - too bad.

Selfish? Narr, realistic. I live to create music.

Anyway, peace

Adikkal
 
thast exactly what i was saying Backo. hahah. I think you blokes are awesome - I think you are the type of blokes that chicks look at and talk to in a club, or elsewhere and they assume that we have stunning girlfriends or whatever.

or maybe thats just an illusion i have in my mind when glamours walk right past me. =D
 
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