black on white.
the color of my mascara on your white shirt,
only in the dark you cannot see it, but i know it is there
because i conceal my falling tears tonight, burying my face in the crevace of your shirt,
here in the folds i hope you dont feel the hot sting of silent tears
because i dont feel like explaining them.
you're almost asleep.
stroking my hair, but not making me sleepy like it usually does
i hear you snore softly so i move your arm off my shoulder
and tread softly, quietly to the fridge for the bottle of wine and a frosted glass.
i press the cold glass gently to my wet cheeks and get back into bed.
you stir lightly, realizing i've moved
and maybe you hear the cork pop, the glass fill
the chugging of the wine down my choked-up throat.
one glass... then another.
then my throat is stinging and the glass is irrelevant -
i finish the bottle, drinking straight from it.
then, lying back in bed - you have all the pillows
and i stare straight up at the ceiling and feel tears still falling out the corners of my eyes.
you pull me closer
you touch my face
and you ask me what's wrong
but i dont answer
and now i'm sobbing, sobbing into your sleeve.
i hate myself for falling apart,
and i cant even bring myself to tell you what's bothering me.
it seems so petty -- but to me, its the world.
i choke out words.... a sentence
you sigh.
"i dont do that often enough" you say
and kiss me
you start to turn away, realizing....
but i wrap my arms around you and put my head on your chest
and you embrace me tighter
until we both fall asleep like that.
when i wake up, its the middle of the night
you are suddenly awake too,
and your lips find mine
and they feel so familiar and wonderful...
the whole situation is dreamlike
feeling each other now
and i want you in me
but at the same time,
something is not right....
this isn't making love
this isn't what i want, how i want it, tonight
and i pull away
your heart's not in it
and the black-on-white reminds me that i shouldn't have to cry myself to sleep
not with you....
i leave you, lingering for more,
but i slip down into the crevace of your arms
and find the spot where i fit just perfectly
and find night again, peace...
and the night slips by ... black
black like the smudged sadness on your sleeve
which you will wash off today
and we will forget all about this night
until tomorrow
the color of my mascara on your white shirt,
only in the dark you cannot see it, but i know it is there
because i conceal my falling tears tonight, burying my face in the crevace of your shirt,
here in the folds i hope you dont feel the hot sting of silent tears
because i dont feel like explaining them.
you're almost asleep.
stroking my hair, but not making me sleepy like it usually does
i hear you snore softly so i move your arm off my shoulder
and tread softly, quietly to the fridge for the bottle of wine and a frosted glass.
i press the cold glass gently to my wet cheeks and get back into bed.
you stir lightly, realizing i've moved
and maybe you hear the cork pop, the glass fill
the chugging of the wine down my choked-up throat.
one glass... then another.
then my throat is stinging and the glass is irrelevant -
i finish the bottle, drinking straight from it.
then, lying back in bed - you have all the pillows
and i stare straight up at the ceiling and feel tears still falling out the corners of my eyes.
you pull me closer
you touch my face
and you ask me what's wrong
but i dont answer
and now i'm sobbing, sobbing into your sleeve.
i hate myself for falling apart,
and i cant even bring myself to tell you what's bothering me.
it seems so petty -- but to me, its the world.
i choke out words.... a sentence
you sigh.
"i dont do that often enough" you say
and kiss me
you start to turn away, realizing....
but i wrap my arms around you and put my head on your chest
and you embrace me tighter
until we both fall asleep like that.
when i wake up, its the middle of the night
you are suddenly awake too,
and your lips find mine
and they feel so familiar and wonderful...
the whole situation is dreamlike
feeling each other now
and i want you in me
but at the same time,
something is not right....
this isn't making love
this isn't what i want, how i want it, tonight
and i pull away
your heart's not in it
and the black-on-white reminds me that i shouldn't have to cry myself to sleep
not with you....
i leave you, lingering for more,
but i slip down into the crevace of your arms
and find the spot where i fit just perfectly
and find night again, peace...
and the night slips by ... black
black like the smudged sadness on your sleeve
which you will wash off today
and we will forget all about this night
until tomorrow
