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Besides the actual drug...what do you enjoy about the drug game?

Waiting. NOT! But I do love the feeling of my phone vibrating (it vibrates before ringing) when I've been waiting all day for my dealer, and I know he's a minute away and I'm finally getting high soon. I can go from feeling sick to having all the energy in the world with a phone call.
 
The Game and the Life

So I was thinkin about this today. What makes the game so appealing with all the dangers involved in it. Be it yer a junky or a pimp or a dealer I think there's an underlying psychological appeal that keeps me an others tied down to this lifestyle.

I mean fuck it I always say I can give up the drugs an get clean but I don't think I can get outta this lifestyle that's so damn appealing for some reason.

So what do y'all think? Is it a 'rush' ya get from doin illegal activity that makes it appealing or the power of manipulation of others to further yerself in the game? Or is it just that the 'other' life meanin the simple straight law abiding 9 to 5 come home an do nothing life is just that borin.

I mean sure there's so much other shit to do out there an so many other thrills that can provide that exitement but there's somethin about the lifestyle that's got me an many othere chained to it.

Thoughts?
 
Crackwhores. Everyone loves whores. Especially when they randomly run up on your car, open your door, you freak out and say noooooo, and they ask you for a 7-UP from the 12 pack you have chillin on your seat. :\
 
Tommyboy said:
Waiting. NOT! But I do love the feeling of my phone vibrating (it vibrates before ringing) when I've been waiting all day for my dealer, and I know he's a minute away and I'm finally getting high soon. I can go from feeling sick to having all the energy in the world with a phone call.
Click to expand...

This has always astounded me - just how powerful my mind is over w/d symptoms. Just the assurance of the imminent high is enough to mollify my symptoms, if not completely, then enough to function my way over to pick up and fix up.

One of my favorite aspects of drug culture since I first started smoking weed behind dumpsters as a preteen is the feeling of setting aside society's rules and engaging in a aspect of the hierarchy of the drug trade - albeit the very bottom of said hierarchy. I remember often thinking about my nominal role as a marijuana user in the larger picture of it all and feeling somewhat giddy. Of course, I knew jack shit about where my drugs were produced, who smuggled them, brokered them, what kind of collateral damage was incurred.... anything beyond my pot coming from my friend's older brother. Yet I liked the instant branding of outsider I felt when I considered a vast criminal market working in the backdrop.

In one particular instance, I was smoking by a trash compacter behind a nickel arcade w/ my childhood best friends. I was 12. As we passed the joint along its rotation my slightly older friend noticed a used syringe w/ a meager amount of darkened solution left there within. I cannot explain it, but I felt some kind of affinity w/ the object, or some identification w/ its history.... it was a weird sensation, but what I should have experienced as a bad harbinger instead manifested as arousal due to this naive and juvenile notion I'd some communion w/ the IV user who'd irresponsibly disposed of their rig. Looking back, since before I knew drugs in any way, I'd wanted that tag.

Later in life, after copping a major IV addiction w/ several substances, I enjoyed merging into groups of users and feeling a fiend. It was all reminiscent of those early feelings. I don't know if it is wanting somewhere to belong. Certainly I appreciate having an objective - or having my talents, ambitions, drive, and time funneled into the objective of obtaining and using. It granted me purpose and fulfillment w/o all the work and soul searching it takes most people.

Sorry if these are pessimistic, but these are the enjoyable elements outside of using, and I guess my IV ritual, which come to mind.
 
the fact that everyday I woke up, I knew my purpose, my goal, my destiny. to get more heroin at any cost.

living on the fringe of death and prison is exciting. knowing every dope deal could end up a 5 year sentence and every shot could lead to the eternal sleep. high stakes Russian roulette.

realizing that a simple bag that's worth $X to a dealer is priceless in the hands of a junkie. in effect, drugs could a marketable value on human emotion which is deemed otherwise priceless, so basically the user's "profit" is infinite and the dealer always takes a "loss".

being involved with something "greater", in an underground community that accepts and respects who you are and what you've done.

going against the mainstream grain of pathetic alcohol consumption and experience the pinnacle of human pleasure on a chemical level.

stealing other peoples worthless material items will provide little joy to them in comparison to the relief/enjoyment you will gain with your next high.

giving the proverbial "fuck you" to law enforcement and all other anti drug propaganda pushers

joining the hardcore users when you first stick the needle in your arm

and finally, the whole ritual of IV drug usage. the needle was my lover, my child, my employer, my relief, my medicine, my purpose, my life. live by the rig and die by it. that little contraption of plastic, rubber, and metal was the gate to heaven and hell.
 
I honestly don't enjoy anything about the lifestyle other than the obvious.
Well, there is one thing that gives me a bit of a rush.
When you're on foot in the city & cop your dope and you have to go find a spot to shoot up at.
It's like a mini-rush before the actual rush.
 
The open-ness of the whole drug user community. And it feels kinda exclusive. Like, sometimes I just feel bonds with other drug users. And it's just a cool community, like a whole other world, that non-drug users don't even know exists. (Or at least not in the same way.)
 
The journey to acquire the drugs makes up 50% or more of the overall enjoyment I get out of it. And having drugs on hand I get pleasure from, I can let them sit longer than 90% of the users I know. But that makes for some very frustrating and annoying moments when user-friends know what i have and keep pestering me to let them get some. I hate that part!

Drugs are a very strange thing, any way they are looked at. I don't really enjoy being around trap-houses and shit.....its just too sketchy and you can't really trust anyone.

Lol being at the pawn shop is also a ridiculous aspect. Just listen to pawn shop by sublime....it makes sense. Not only is it shameful, but if you just get over it and don't beat yourself up too much its really funny! That is, until you are broke and without drugs again! lol
 
Oh, I just had to add I get this ridiculous pleasure from researching drugs whether on them or not. My inner scientist loves to look at drugs from a strictly factual/chemical/scientific angle. Its awesome hahaha!


aannnnnd I can watch drug documentaries like its nobody's business....lol it ain't even right!
 
I love crushing pills and spending ages chopping them up really fine and dividing them into a few perfect little lines.
I love the feeling when you secure your next deal or get your next prescription. Even before you have the stuff, just the knowledge that you will very soon.
Most of all I love the actually insullating (or chewing/swallowing) and the actual drug itself <3. Bliss.
 
Renz Envy said:
The adventure.

As a kid growing up in white suburbia I was told to never venture to certain parts of town. I was told who the bad guys were. I was afraid of it all.

One day I broke out of the shell. I learned that 99% of people are nice once you get to know them personally. There were a lot fewer real bad guys out there.

Making friends.
I was meeting people that live their life the way they want to live it and not according to what society tells them to do; Even if that means being a drug addict or homosexual. I think there's a deep level of fearlessness in their life style that defines them not as scum, but free. While the "good" side of society is stuck working like slaves, only being rewarded with alcohol, the "bad" side enjoys a freedom that only the forefathers of America experienced.

If you're not going to be a rich, successful motherfucker, you might as well be a poor, happy, free one.
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Same here. My parents always warned me of the scum and the criminals and druggies...the Bad People.
I too have since discovered that actually 99% of people are nice once you get to know them. And a drug dealer isn't necessarily a mafia gansta who'll break your legs if you're a day late paying (I always pay on the spot just in case haha :P), it might be a teenage kid trying to get some extra cash selling weed or a woman in her 60s selling her Oxys.
People are just people and being a "druggie" or an "addict" doesn't make you bad.
 
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I love the excitement during the day when I have an awesome drug-fueled night planned ahead of me. My best friend and I always get super excited and ridiculous when we're hanging out, waiting for the night to start. It's usually almost as fun as the actual drugs.
I don't like much else about the 'drug game' tho. Sure I like some of the people I've met because of drugs, but I probably dislike more of them. I don't think that drug users are cooler or more open-minded than any other segment of the population. Except the ones on bluelight :)
 
The surge of emotions I feel while procuring substances illegally is a rush in and of itself. I find that this type of rush tends to intensify tenfold if I am walking or taking a bus or taxi. The combination of anxiety, elation, and fear of getting caught or not obtaining the desired substance is something I often intensely miss during periods of sobriety.
 
The rush.

Knowing that you're doing something that you shouldn't be doing.

On top of that, doing something that majority of people never do in their entire life.

It's just a straight, fucking rush.

I don't like the violence though...
 
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