faceplant
Bluelighter
As ive mentioned before here, I suffer quite heavily from social anxiety disorder. However Ive booked tickets to a pystrance festival next month and I absolutely cant wait, im stoked 
. Problem is, its my first festival and that kind of setting is going to be very difficult for me anyway, even more so for 3 days. I am also meeting an internet friend ive known for 1.5 years + for the first time (properly) who also has anxiety issues. So im again really excited but really nervous. What Im scared will happen is, Ill do my usual, retreat into my own little anxious world, have no fun at all and look like a dick.
Benzos seem perfect here, for short term highly effective anxiety management that still leaves me functional. However me and benzos have a rough past. About a year ago I had abused benzos quite a bit after originally self medicating for my anxiety, really liking the feeling and being very naive as to the addictive pottnetial of benzos. the problem wasnt the minor addiction, the problem was id take enough to get high, lose every inhibition to me name, take a load more, do crazy shit and wake up with no memory. That happened for the third time, and things got bad, and I haven't touched benzos since, I suffered for the cold turkey withdrawal for a while.
My plan was to take with me maybe 4-5 mg of xanax or something similar, to be taken in 0.5mg installments as and when needed. I Shoudlt have any addiction issues for just 3 days of use, I dont think. (I think they recommend 2 weeks max). And I am confident that at this dose I will still be fully functioning and wont go nuts. And even If i do, 4 mg certainly is by no means the worst dose Ive taken. Even on 4mg I think id be reasonably in control, but obviosuly my tolreance is zilch now.
The other problem I forsee is that I very very much intend to indulge in a variety of other mind altering substances. Most likely to be weed, alcohol, mxe, an opiate of some description, mdma and possibly some mushrooms if i feel up to it. At such a low dose of benzos, I dont imadgine it will be a problem, but id really appreciate some feedback on how safe that level of benzos would be taken in combination with the drugs mentioned above. Anxiety is always a problem when Im enhanced, particularly with weed, mxe and mushrooms, so some releif from that would be really great.
So does that sound like a good plan or a terrible idea? And are any of those combos possibly dangerous. (Ill be very careful of how much I drink if I decided to go down the benzo route, a beer or two max).
Any feedback appreciated
.
On a side note, any uk bluelighters at cosmo this year ?
. Problem is, its my first festival and that kind of setting is going to be very difficult for me anyway, even more so for 3 days. I am also meeting an internet friend ive known for 1.5 years + for the first time (properly) who also has anxiety issues. So im again really excited but really nervous. What Im scared will happen is, Ill do my usual, retreat into my own little anxious world, have no fun at all and look like a dick.Benzos seem perfect here, for short term highly effective anxiety management that still leaves me functional. However me and benzos have a rough past. About a year ago I had abused benzos quite a bit after originally self medicating for my anxiety, really liking the feeling and being very naive as to the addictive pottnetial of benzos. the problem wasnt the minor addiction, the problem was id take enough to get high, lose every inhibition to me name, take a load more, do crazy shit and wake up with no memory. That happened for the third time, and things got bad, and I haven't touched benzos since, I suffered for the cold turkey withdrawal for a while.
My plan was to take with me maybe 4-5 mg of xanax or something similar, to be taken in 0.5mg installments as and when needed. I Shoudlt have any addiction issues for just 3 days of use, I dont think. (I think they recommend 2 weeks max). And I am confident that at this dose I will still be fully functioning and wont go nuts. And even If i do, 4 mg certainly is by no means the worst dose Ive taken. Even on 4mg I think id be reasonably in control, but obviosuly my tolreance is zilch now.
The other problem I forsee is that I very very much intend to indulge in a variety of other mind altering substances. Most likely to be weed, alcohol, mxe, an opiate of some description, mdma and possibly some mushrooms if i feel up to it. At such a low dose of benzos, I dont imadgine it will be a problem, but id really appreciate some feedback on how safe that level of benzos would be taken in combination with the drugs mentioned above. Anxiety is always a problem when Im enhanced, particularly with weed, mxe and mushrooms, so some releif from that would be really great.
So does that sound like a good plan or a terrible idea? And are any of those combos possibly dangerous. (Ill be very careful of how much I drink if I decided to go down the benzo route, a beer or two max).
Any feedback appreciated
.On a side note, any uk bluelighters at cosmo this year ?
