Lorazepam has the strange of effect of relaxing the muscles in my mouth, and bringing a meaty aftertaste in my mouth after I eat anything. Also lorazepam has a very strong synergy with alcohol, bromazepam you can drink pretty much normally. 7.5mg lorafen :D always brings about a sometimes unwanted ataxia, tiredness; much like 2mg alprazolam gives a hit to the brain that frankly becomes boring fast, not to mention tiredness, headache. Clonazepam, bromazepam were the cleanest benzos to me, though clonazepam I think has a tendancy to mess more with your mood. Phenazepam has a perfect balance for a benzo, if you use it right.
For some reason 20mg diazepam now gives me a pretty much insta-depression.
Another nice thing about taking circa 18mg bromazepam spaced throughout the day; you get very good sleep and wake up the next morning still feeling a distinct relaxation from the head. The diazepam relaxation is clear headed, but sharp, pretty much your entire body is covered with the sedation, the problem is is that it's not balanced, your vision is somewhat fucked, but your head feels too calm yet weighty and open, hard to explain, but I associate the feeling with being depressed.
On the other hand phenazepam, lorazepam, triazolam, alprazolam leave no space in your head, they are intoxicating. Phenazepam though seems to intoxicate in the head (though not too much) though not in the body, leaves you feeling (mistakenly) sober. Some have mentioned an anti-psychotic effect with phenaz.
Clonazepam is just weird, makes me do stupid shit, fun to snort (though I know it doesn't work), can't really feel when it stops working.
Sorry for the long rambling non-nonsensical post, trying to work off MDPV psychosis.
That being said the time I was completely cured from anxiety, pretty much all mental problems; was with the desoxypipradrol + benzo combo. Unbelievable during the time it works; though it is not manageable for longer than a month, 2 months. 5mg desoxy snorted at 8.00 in the morning, 2 10mg diazepams during the day gave me incredible euphoria. 16mg phenaz day + 20mg - 30mg desoxy freebase smoked made me think I was invincible.
Tetrazepam is actually the strangest benzo I've used, only worked once for me, took a high dose (maybe 300mg), was actually more euphoric than 2mg xanax; only worked as a muscle relaxant, and only seemed to work for 2 hours or so, but damn it felt good.
Had my share of benzos, I know it's bad, though they work so well, always seem to come back. Pregabalin is not an alternative, maybe gabapentin is.
Though I think they are not as horrible as the Ashton Manual makes them seem. Pretty much sticking to the rule of use/even heavy abuse of long-acting benzos for a month, then taking a 2-3 weeks break worked for a long time, then back to the alcohol. With my phenazepam abuse, I became more psychologically addicted to the benzo giving a distinct body/mind high, hence the high doses, but prob. not much real tolerance I think, but can't really say as I'm an alcoholic, and there probably is a GABA connection.
