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Beating cancer

Y

Yomaukkis

Bluelighter
Joined
May 8, 2010
Messages
68
Someone told me to post this to dark side instead of other drug forum..

I just tried to do little 4-6 lines of good amphetamine powder and it motivates the fuck and makes me feel well being and happy after finding out I got severe lung cancer and dont know if I live more than few years.

Im ony 21 years old turning 22 this summer 8)

I seriously Iam depressed without drugs to cover the pain I have family and girl I like.

Anyone would blame me for doing speed once a week for few dayss or so?

Any comments appreaciated.. hahah Im so spun but happy for while. Stupid depression killing me
 
My friends mother is battling lung cancer right now. It is very hard for my friend and her family but right now I'm there for her. I know you're depressed but I don't think you need speed you just need someone there for you. You need to talk about this because there are people there for you. I want you to stay healthy because you will have a better chance of recovering. My friends mother is going through chemo and she says it does suck...it does cause her to be sick but she does it because there still is a big chance she will live. That chance is there for you too. Please don't give up. I hope you get well soon.

Also I would like to add my friends mother before lung cancer had breast cancer and made it through that. She use to be into drugs but quit them and has been sober for many years now. She didn't need to turn back to the drugs because she had the strength to fight this and you do too. I'm not knocking you getting high its just with doing the drugs you listed it will negatively impact your success rate for beating the lung cancer.
 
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Fucking cancer Im so unlucky at this age.. I try not to inform anyone including my family brother mother and father and closest friends dont wanna everyone to say me ok thank you yea youre tuff arent you afraid do you afraid is there something do you belive in god and those shit.

Yes Im this tuff I keep it to myself people like my mother father and bro would go so depresssed why tell them? yet...

sorry if it doesnt make any sence Im on white lines right now
 
I hope your momma gets to beat the cancer.. I fear of death but I got years time before it kills me if it even does.

And if its gonna get sick ill like so much pain in lungs cant breath throwing up blood without hope I do suicide with oxycontins and tell my family and close people im sorry nothing more,
 
Don't keep it to yourself. I thought I was tough bottling it up but it turned me into a cold person and then I just wanted to explode. Its okay you don't make sense completely but I want you to rethink this, sober.. Do not kill yourself. Cancer can't control you so don't let it. Please talk to someone or even yet you can message me if you want. I don't know you but I'm there for you.

Please cancer isn't the end. You can get better if you try. Also people I've seen who tend to have cancer keep their emotions to themselves until one day they finally speak up to someone about how they feel. Which helped them a lot. I know deep inside you want someone to acknowledge your pain.
 
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Thank you I would love to inform my parents living at home still.. But they would get super worried and nervous crying and all. I told my 1 best friend from childhood he started crying.

Im stronger than this feel superior gonna fucking cure this cancer and get over my depression.. suicide is not opinion unless it goes to throwing up blood constantly and having the most hard time cope after doctors tell me theres nothing they could do.
 
Okay good and you're welcome but I hope you tell your parents sooner than later. They will be crying when you tell them but what parent wouldn't unless they have no heart? This will be much better than them finding out after you've have gotten so sick or if the worse happens. I wish you the best of luck.

I almost had cancer once. I was so scared so I can imagine how you're feeling. I was depressed but with time I felt better and I didn't dwell on the bad things anymore. I looked more at the positive which helped a lot.
 
I think its uncureable cancer and I also fear of having throat cancer also because I smoked and still do shit lots of cigarettes and weed each day.. even cancer does not make me stop smoking..
I die if I die it feels like on the speed lines I took..

Drugs to day I die cant go on without. was it weed benzos oxycontin amphetamiens extacy or whatever. Have to cope. Theres no god my life is ending is someone to judge me. I like talking on the internet with people I dont know giving me hope and motivation to go on and to do good things like telling my parents would be good idea.
 
Lung cancer can be curable although it is a long process the same with throat cancer. You may think that you will continue with everything your doing such as smoking but once you're laying on deaths bed you will think otherwise. I just hope you realize that before so that day will never come (well at least not anytime soon). There's just something in our mind that when we're about to die we fight so hard to stay alive and I want you to start that fight now. Yes, you could die but you could also still live. Don't worry about the future. Worry about the present. If death comes earlier than expected at least you gave it your all. Also whether there's a God or not we will never truly know until its our time and we die.
 
Yomaukkis said:
Thank you I would love to inform my parents living at home still.. But they would get super worried and nervous crying and all. I told my 1 best friend from childhood he started crying.

Im stronger than this feel superior gonna fucking cure this cancer and get over my depression.. suicide is not opinion unless it goes to throwing up blood constantly and having the most hard time cope after doctors tell me theres nothing they could do.
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First of all, you would want to know if someone you love has cancer or any other serious illness, yeah? You should definitely keep your immediate family informed with what's going on. If anything they can help support you. Of course they'll be upset but times like this can even make a family stronger; closer.

Secondly, I would seriously stay away from any drugs not prescribed to you at the moment. I don't wanna harp but at the same time it doesn't sound like you have any idea as to how much impact drug use can have on your body, especially when it's under so much duress. You say you want to beat this cancer? The best way to do that is to get with doctors, fight the disease, and treat your body like the temple it is. This doesn't include poisoning it with speed =/

Besides, the high you're feeling is only temporary. It's masking your depression, not fixing it. Drugs distract us from our problems while creating even more problems [for most people]. Treat yourself to some help, get healthier, and march onward. Don't whittle away the time you have left denying your state of being (whether said time is one year or one hundred, it doesn't matter).

In the end it's all up to you but I want to make one main point: When it comes to cancer, actually fighting it in every way possible REALLY makes a difference. Changing your diet, cutting out bad habits, etc. DRASTICALLY improves your chances of regaining your health again! I can't stress this enough. Your outlook on life also has a sort of physical effect on you [as well as mental, obviously]... If you're stressed and strung out all the time, your body is going to fail you. There are other ways to cope with depression than drug use. Please explore other options... You have nothing to lose by doing this.

I had cancer when I was just 18. It was found on a whim and if I hadn't gotten a simple checkup, I never would've known about it and it would've killed me in a few short years, tops. Within two weeks of finding out about it, I had surgery to remove it and ever since then I've had to have regular screenings to test for it again. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I know how you feel when it comes to fighting the big C and it's incredibly daunting. If you need anyone to talk to you are more than welcome to PM me.
 
I wish I even belived in god because I have always though its ridicilous theres no jesus its big joke.

What comformts me that I have atleast 1 year or 2 to live. I aim to get girl pregnant have me children to this world before I go even if i didnt see the kid.
 
Yomaukkis said:
I wish I even belived in god because I have always though its ridicilous theres no jesus its big joke.

What comformts me that I have atleast 1 year or 2 to live. I aim to get girl pregnant have me children to this world before I go even if i didnt see the kid.
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I use to have faith but it seemed to fade away. Yet it doesn't mean I don't believe in God. I've seen so much happen and just to think there is no higher being would be mad but sometimes I have my doubts. No ones telling you, you have to believe. Its your choice.

A year or two is for someone who is healthy and not getting high...wasting away their only chances of surviving. Also that time limit is NOT definite. You can make it through this. Believe you can.
 
I can't tell if you're being serious but come on, don't bring a child into this :P I know we're hardwired to reproduce at all costs and that being a parent is one of the most wonderful things a person can do but if you absolutely know you won't be around in the future, don't bring that kind of pain on a child. Children without one or both parents experience a lot more challenges than those with two.

If anything mentor a child that's already in your life and try to make a positive impact on them. This is something you can do whether or not you plan on sticking around for any amount of time.

Anyway, it sounds like you don't really know much about your case yet. What are the specifics, if you don't mind me asking? All we know is that you have lung cancer and you don't expect to live long but have your doctors actually come out and said that there's nothing you can do?

You should know that even if they did say that, it's worth getting another opinion. I actually know someone who was diagnosed with breast cancer and her doctor told her she would die and there was nothing they could do. He was okay with her foregoing treatment because she only had a few months left as far as he was concerned, so why spend those months struggling with radiation and chemo? She sought a second opinion and this new doctor told her that no, she didn't have to die. He started treating her and the cancer went into remission in a few months' time. If she had just stuck with the original doctor's opinion and passed on treatment, she surely would've died in a very short period of time.

This person is my mom and she's still here today, entirely healthy and happy. I'm glad she didn't listen to the first doctor. I'm not trying to say you shouldn't listen to your docs but if someone's telling you something as serious as "you're going to die," it's worth hearing another opinion.

Besides, no one can ever tell you with 100% certainty that you WILL die when it comes to cancer. For some reason even the worst cases can turn around. There are plenty of stories about this happening so don't give up hope no matter how bad it looks. Once again, respect yourself enough to FIGHT this thing 'cause you never know, you very well may win.
 
it could be good to come to some further understanding of this yourself, before bringing it up to your parents, maybe seeing a therapist would help prepare you for their reaction, and how to prepare them for your understanding of it.

do you think talking to your brother first would help ease the blow for you, and bring some support when speaking with your parents?

i should think you have a right to enjoy your life in a different right.
but amphetamines are going to try and crash you hard- i mean, they are known for this. exposing yourself to something with such an aggressive depressive side-effect, is only detaching for so long.

depending on where you live, you can chose to decide when you are ready ~to leave~ under such circumstances, and there are many surprising 'treatments&therapies' not made available to most. there are much better ways ways, to do what you are doing with professional help - and with your mind in the best shape possible, similar choices can be yours therapeutically.

you are so young, how did you receive this diagnosis, what is the cause?
 
I had a tumor removed from my head as a kid. it could have easily killed me. everyday since is a gift. but I wish i had the strength to take the gift and give back something instead of just wasting it with drugs and shit.
 
So many replys.. good thanks for bothering to give advices or comments whatever.. Too high on the stimulant cant bother to read whole posts.. hehe its fun I'll be back .. amazing that cancers not on my minda t the moment :p:)
 
I really hope you end up reading the responses people have made because there are some really good ones that definitely would've helped me when I had cancer and will hopefully do the same for you.
 
Yes please dont delete Im on almost overdose level of speed.. hehe :)

Just wanted to let you know I'll be back reading all the great responses and good luck to anyone else out here/there to beat and kill the cancers n tumors!

Too depressed so decided to take even more and more of the shit and forget aalll bad for tonight.. Gonna visit friend maybe smoke some weed I know hes high on amphetamines at the moment.
 
User Name Here said:
I can't tell if you're being serious but come on, don't bring a child into this :P I know we're hardwired to reproduce at all costs and that being a parent is one of the most wonderful things a person can do but if you absolutely know you won't be around in the future, don't bring that kind of pain on a child. Children without one or both parents experience a lot more challenges than those with two.

If anything mentor a child that's already in your life and try to make a positive impact on them. This is something you can do whether or not you plan on sticking around for any amount of time.

Anyway, it sounds like you don't really know much about your case yet. What are the specifics, if you don't mind me asking? All we know is that you have lung cancer and you don't expect to live long but have your doctors actually come out and said that there's nothing you can do?

You should know that even if they did say that, it's worth getting another opinion. I actually know someone who was diagnosed with breast cancer and her doctor told her she would die and there was nothing they could do. He was okay with her foregoing treatment because she only had a few months left as far as he was concerned, so why spend those months struggling with radiation and chemo? She sought a second opinion and this new doctor told her that no, she didn't have to die. He started treating her and the cancer went into remission in a few months' time. If she had just stuck with the original doctor's opinion and passed on treatment, she surely would've died in a very short period of time.

This person is my mom and she's still here today, entirely healthy and happy. I'm glad she didn't listen to the first doctor. I'm not trying to say you shouldn't listen to your docs but if someone's telling you something as serious as "you're going to die," it's worth hearing another opinion.

Besides, no one can ever tell you with 100% certainty that you WILL die when it comes to cancer. For some reason even the worst cases can turn around. There are plenty of stories about this happening so don't give up hope no matter how bad it looks. Once again, respect yourself enough to FIGHT this thing 'cause you never know, you very well may win.
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Why not want to have a children to this world and be proud I succees on life before god takes me to better place? my fathers happy that he succees on his life and had 2 kids and wife, Now ex-wife though.

I'd like to get nice girl friend then later on children and move out of parents home before dying.. Btw im 21 years old only... my fear is that cancer will kill me its severe and they suspect throar cancer or tumor whatever it may be.

Im very unlucky they tell me but dont give up..:| Dead is whats constantly on my mind expect now and then when taken enough drugs of some sort to feel well and forget the negative n bad stuff.
 
panic in paradise said:
it could be good to come to some further understanding of this yourself, before bringing it up to your parents, maybe seeing a therapist would help prepare you for their reaction, and how to prepare them for your understanding of it.

do you think talking to your brother first would help ease the blow for you, and bring some support when speaking with your parents?

i should think you have a right to enjoy your life in a different right.
but amphetamines are going to try and crash you hard- i mean, they are known for this. exposing yourself to something with such an aggressive depressive side-effect, is only detaching for so long.

depending on where you live, you can chose to decide when you are ready ~to leave~ under such circumstances, and there are many surprising 'treatments&therapies' not made available to most. there are much better ways ways, to do what you are doing with professional help - and with your mind in the best shape possible, similar choices can be yours therapeutically.

you are so young, how did you receive this diagnosis, what is the cause?
Click to expand...

Didnt really read the whole thing but telling my parents is not an opinion coz I know my mom would care too fucking much and cry herself to sleep each night and ask all time do you need anything? Are you depressed? how you holding up? where ya going? my father would do the same but no speak too much just be present and brother would say fucking hell and hang out with me more. writing this it could be good idea to tell. have all family present
 
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