Jabberwocky
Frumious Bandersnatch
there are days I think to myself and ask myself if I truly will be on "drugs" the rest of my life. I cannot picture living life w/o bupe at this point; I was an opiate/heroin addict for the past 12yrs w/ 3 years of sobriety in the mix (04-07) but other than that I was using daily.
sure, I am on bupe, and take 12MG's/day but I feel great and I am able to get buy w/o using dope, w/o buying dope/ w/o seeing a needle daily, and w/o spending every fucking dollar in my pocket. my Dr. visit (all done on iChat) may cost $140/mo but I was spending $100+ a day just to get dope. its a sick, sick disease, but for once in my life I feel like I have gotten away from it and able to stay away.
but lets face, I may be on bupe for life. I have no intentions of getting off or dropping dosage anytime soon; I started at 16MG and went down to 12MG's over 4 months. last time I was on bupe about 2 years ago I went from 24 down to 4MG over a 9 month period and then went on one of the most vicious runs of my life where I abused 1-2G'/day minimum along w/ everything else that could go into a vein.
life has been great since kicking it once again; they sent me away to a 2 week DUI program and I didnt have a choice and had to find a way to finish the program or get jail time; I chose bupe and it was the best thing I could have done. problem is, its still a drug, and w/o it I would be miserable and want to die. kinda funny how that works.
anyone else plan on being on "drugs" the rest of their life?
sure, I am on bupe, and take 12MG's/day but I feel great and I am able to get buy w/o using dope, w/o buying dope/ w/o seeing a needle daily, and w/o spending every fucking dollar in my pocket. my Dr. visit (all done on iChat) may cost $140/mo but I was spending $100+ a day just to get dope. its a sick, sick disease, but for once in my life I feel like I have gotten away from it and able to stay away.
but lets face, I may be on bupe for life. I have no intentions of getting off or dropping dosage anytime soon; I started at 16MG and went down to 12MG's over 4 months. last time I was on bupe about 2 years ago I went from 24 down to 4MG over a 9 month period and then went on one of the most vicious runs of my life where I abused 1-2G'/day minimum along w/ everything else that could go into a vein.
life has been great since kicking it once again; they sent me away to a 2 week DUI program and I didnt have a choice and had to find a way to finish the program or get jail time; I chose bupe and it was the best thing I could have done. problem is, its still a drug, and w/o it I would be miserable and want to die. kinda funny how that works.
anyone else plan on being on "drugs" the rest of their life?