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Are you conscious of preserving your image when you indulge in drugs ?

some of the other posters touched on this, but depending on what kind of career, position you hold in your community, etc., and partially depending on your age in some cases, it's not always possible to just say "i don't give a fuck; this is who i am, like me or suck it.."

i guess you can always do that, but the negative repercussions for, say, a 40-year old doctor, who has to worry about things like licensing boards, keeping a good reputation w/ the medical community and his/her patients, and so on, are much greater than, for example, a 20-year-old taking a year off from college waiting tables. depending on where life takes you, there might be more to it than just preserving your image b/c you don't want friends to gossip about you being a druggie.
 
MDAO said
verso and ColtDan, you must be in lines of work (and residential neighborhoods, and social circles, etc.) where open drug use is socially acceptable. I'm not in that position by a long shot, and I reckon I'm hardly the only one here who hasn't that luxury.

Plus, even among people who know I use drugs and don't judge me for it, insh'Allah, I don't ever want it rubbed in my face that I'm an example of how drugs inevitably ruin perfectly good people, despite good intentions. Because then I'd have a duty to them to give up drugs entirely if I wished to keep their respect. Because I have no plans to completely quit, ever. Yeah, I might let the world see me as a mangled, blithering, bodily fluid soaked mess if I were a young adolescent male who was out to "get it out of my system while I'm young, before I get serious about life". Judge me all you want, but drugs are a part of my serious life. And as such, I treat any decision to use drugs with due seriousness.
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Tip of the hat to you sir.. balancing it out, so people like me who go about in public " as a mangled, blithering, bodily fluid soaked mess if I were a young adolescent " lol aren't the only way people see drug users..

jokes all aside, I do hope to become a responsible casualish drug user like you and the others here one day.. nearing 30 so.. clocks ticking LOL..
 
I am very careful to hide my drug use from everyone bar my closest friend. If it got out at work that I was a heroin addict I would instantly be looked upon as a dirty smackhead and treated as some sort of Leper.
It wouldn't matter that I am the same person they have known for years and got along fine with. Sometimes things are best left unsaid.
 
maxalfie said:
I am very careful to hide my drug use from everyone bar my closest friend. If it got out at work that I was a heroin addict I would instantly be looked upon as a dirty smackhead and treated as some sort of Leper.
It wouldn't matter that I am the same person they have known for years and got along fine with. Sometimes things are best left unsaid.
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Yupper............its crazy how people judge others, I guess it makes them feel good talking about others but the way I see it, let he who is w/o skeletons in their closet point the 1st finger............or he who is w/o sin cast the 1st stone...........:)
 
I find that the people who know I use what I use when I use it BEAT ME OVER THE HEAD WITH IT. If I say a silly sentence or if I put a spoon away with the forks, I'm a pothead even though I'm not high every time I make a mistake. It's just that I can tell by the tone of voices my husband or my grown sons use that I am being brought to task for smoking mj. Those are just two small examples of ways my family expresses disapproval.

Which is fine, because my husband's opinion is as important to him as mine is to me, and he tolerates the smoke but certainly would rather I didn't smoke. Instead of just dropping it already, he waits for occasions as I've sampled above to slap me with that "You can sure tell you are a pothead."

Conversely, I'm living with my parents right now.

There have been a few occasions since I've been living with my parents and helping my mom out that I've had to interact with my dad while high. I only smoke at night after he goes to bed. He was an undercover narcotics agent when I was growing up and we had a lot of arguments about marijuana when I was a teenager. Now I'm 52 and he still feels that as long as marijuana is illegal under federal law, it's illegal, period, and we should follow the rules because that's all civilization is and if we stop following the rules, anarchy will ensue.

As a result, I act ubersober if I am high and I have to talk to him about my mom, or work with him because the toilet has overflowed, etc. I go outside and smoke between 10 and 12, after my parents have gone to bed, and if something happens during or shortly after that time and I have to get in sync with my father, I actually surprise myself (and my father!) because I am quick to help and I have suggestions for situations that impress him. When I'm high in my dad's presence, I'm totally aware of every word, every step, every breath I make. I know he's watching me and I know his opinion of marijuana so I become a stronger version of my sober self. I fold king size fitted sheets by myself, quickly and very neatly. I am precise in discussing my mom's health. I have changed my mom's bedding (with her in the bed) and cleaned my mom up in minutes when he is watching me, and me high as a hundred dollar bill. My own change of power surprises me because I have a deeply imbedded need for my dad to see that marijuana does not make me stupid.

If he really knew what else I do he would sever all our ties. He's a hard man at 83 and federal law is still federal law, DAMMIT. Rules have a reason and we all need to follow the rules. I hide everything else I do because it's all bad and fucked up and he would be so fucking offended and hurt if he knew the truly fucked up shit that I do, it might actually kill him.

I just realized that. Last night I should have gone to jail, and it is a complete miracle that the police let me go. I took some hard core risks, broke a few hard core laws, and I suddenly believe it might have killed him if he had seen all that. :( Holy Shit.

Yes, I am conscious of preserving my image. In fact I try to enhance my image when I smoke weed at my parents' house.
 
On just about any drug, I've now just tried to not go around people and enjoy things alone, and most of the time stay out of public. I'm 24 and not yet a "real adult" with all adult responsibilities, but I have an education and am trying to get a career of some sort going, and I agree with MDAO about this: it's like politics and religion. You don't talk about it with people whose opinion of you really does matter in terms of your own quality of life/self preservation/your source of income and livelihood really. If you are high on anything in such situations, you do your best to make sure nothing is obvious. When just out by myself running errands, I assume no one thinks I'm high because I'm usually just stoned, but IME if there were other things involved (opiates, even benzos) I feel like it's difficult to cover up, although I only half care in those situations.
I do care about my image, and sometimes when people find out you use drugs, they judge you. Whether we like it or not, that's how the world is --- and to succeed in it, it's usually best people don't think you get high.
 
^ it's probably easier to succeed if you hide anything that isn't normal, like being gay, or transgendered or things of that nature. I know we live in an accepting society these days but I constantly hear people being judged for being gay, and if someone dare to be a transexual, or transgendered, they are talked about constantly! I won't even bring up the racist attitudes that I encounter in workplaces anywhere I go. Isn't getting high somewhat of an analogous situation? I don't want to hide who I am, or what I like to do just in case people disagree with it and it would hinder my ability to climb the social ladder or get a great job or whatever. I also don't rub it in their faces either but can't I just be who I am without it affecting my life? I know it isn't clear cut like this, obviously being a murderer/rapist/pedophile is quite different, maybe just so long as what you do doesn't affect anyone else?
 
MyDoorsAreOpen said:
Drugs, in my mind, are right up there with politics, religion, and sex -- things that are just not safe or appropriate topics of conversation with people you're not sure respect your views on the matter, because most people's opinions on these matters are strong and emotionally charged.
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This is how I approach it, except if someone is open to discussing it with me (whether they're on my side or not), I don't have a problem talking with them about my personal experiences. For the most part I consider drug use a variable that is privileged information about someone's life, and because people are just apt to assume one thing or another for every kind of detail they get about a person..I avoid fueling the flame and try to keep people guessing.
 
Whosajiggawaaa said:
When I do drugs like cocaine I try keep it hush hush almost obsessively at times, but alas people still know. When I do it frequently (bi monthly) I minimize it to other people outside of my inner circle (mainly cos I was seen as a bit of a druggie years ago). Wish I could be a cool and just not care about my image, but it probably keeps me on the straight and narrow (well largely anyway).

So do you guys keep it on the down low when you do drugs with a bit of stigma ?
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Oh yeah. People at work know I'm into pills and they don't really care, but they don't know the extent of my drug use and how iv opies have basically become my life (and my wife, to quote lou reed). To keep the fact that it's so major hidden, I've become a heavy vitamin and expensive skin care user over the years, only buying top shelf after-shave, face wash, and the latest and greatest make-up. Also important is hair care, which people subconsciously associate with good health I'm pretty sure, so I use special shampoo and conditioner to keep my hair absolutely beautiful and shining. For styling, I have to use a lot of discretion because drugs can make you sweat more and over-react to heat in general. So I use a combination of Red Ken Maneuvering paste for basic definition (due to the fact that it keeps hair from getting nasty for upwards of 24 hours after washing), and I coat my hands in it and lightly touch the outside of my hair after its been dried and combed to provide a shape that will not move but also shows zero sign of product use. Then, for the parts of my hair that require more exact definition, such as the bangs and the back, I use another salon product made by Red Ken very sparingly. After I have a shape and slight detailing work done, I use a super-strong grip hair spray with bamboo that leaves no shine or evidence but keeps the shape in tact.

With all of this in place, drugs are the last thing people think even when I work very closely with them for long periods of time. Great make-up products can also provide more than just cover-up - they can make you look like a picture of health with practice. I use an eye-roller by L'Oreal at night ($14 at walgreens) to relax the puffiness and a Revlon concealer ($30) for day time action.

basically, I'm very conscious of my drug use, and it takes more than "not acting fucked up" to blend in. In my experience, once you have the look down, you can enjoy being fucked up and ace your job. You can actually enjoy your drugs, basically, and even enjoy yourself more because you know you look good if you save up a little money and invest in finding your body's perfect mix of beauty products depending on whether you have oily or dry skin, oily or dry hair, etc, and do a little research on the internet. Always look for the best brands, regardless of price. Think about it this way: if you're like me you easily spend $1,000+ per month just on maintenance drugs. Cut back a little bit for just a few weeks and you'll have enough money to go to a good salon once a month and also get killer products that will make the habit and life much more fun.

Peace.
 
^That is a bit more high maintenance than what I think is required, but I like your general approach.
Outside of drugs, I eat well exercise and drink water like a fish. I know I'm still in the prime of my youth, but undereye concealer is as deep as I get into any kind of cosmetics. But yeah, as long as your basic appearance is you're doing well and loving life, then no one should have to speculate or even care if they happen to find out something about your drug use.x
 
It really depends on the person/people who are perceiving me. E.g. I have to keep my drug use hidden from my parents now that I live with them once again. When I was on my own I would be pretty honest if they asked (they know I shoot up), but I wouldn't necessarily divulge everything. For most of my friends I don't advertise the more frowned-upon drugs, but I'm honest if they ask. If it's say a girl I'm interested in then I keep my shit on point.
 
Captainballs, you bring up a good point that it's more than 'not acting fucked up'. I think it's when people look unhappy and unhealthy that people start to wonder if, ruling out any more obvious explanation, they're using drugs.
 
Yes, I find I have much more self-control than the average drug user thanks to this website.

If some random person saw my average weekend they'd call me a druggie, but I'm sure if I saw their weekend I'd call them an alcoholic.

But in the end it's about not shitting where you eat. I've had random fucking people ask me for drugs and I've acted like I didn't even know what they were talking about.
 
I'm very open about my drug use, perhaps too open.

But the reason I am this way is because I want to fight the stigma and the stereotype, proving that people who do drugs aren't all menaces to society, out of control or from a particular socio-economic background.

I am failing, of course...
 
I def like to keep it on the low just bc of the stigma surrounding it all. My family is super strict and my friends don't do drugs(only alcohol) so I usually do them by myself and try to keep my composure in front of everyone. People around my area tend to talk A LOT of shit and if 1 person knows, everyone else will hear about it through the grapevine. I don't want to give them a reason to ruin my reputation so I ride solo
 
Depends on the drug, straight up.

Smokin weed, yea I preserve my image.

Takin MDMA, im 50/50, depends on how gone I am.

On shrooms, I can't maintain my image if my life depended on it.
 
now, yes. a few years ago, absolutely not. i used to be the guy nodding out on the subway that people laugh at. i try to be better about it nowadays though. not that i care what people think about my habit anyway but it really does look horrendous haha.
 
Yes. I like to make sure I'm still being successful or doing better than normal to prove a point to the people that know. And I also hide it from my family. My mom knows that I'm pro-drug, but I always tell her that I wouldn't ever use. I'd hate for them to find out for more than one reason.
 
I always try to keep it on the down low and I usually do a good job with it unless I'm on amphetamines. I can never act normal when I'm jacked up.
 
Absolutely, no one knows the full extent of my drug use by myself. There is a number of reasons for this:

1) Stigma- some drugs I am much more sensitive about than others. For instance, only my serious-drug user friends know that I take opiates and even then they have varying degrees of knowledge of what I take. My stoner mates know I take 'opiates', my junkie mates know that I take 'methadone/homebbake heroin'. No one really knows how often I take opiates or how much I take when I do, I tend to take them alone to prevent people from seeing me when I'm fucking wasted and nodding. On the flipside smoking weed is pretty much accepted, particularly by people under the age of about 30, so I have no problem with people knowing I'm a good for nothing stoner.

I use to be more open, but people started to think that I was opiate-dependant, had hep C and was going to steal from them because I started drinking poppy tea once a week during the local season urrgh. People don't understand drugs or drug dependence, they just REALLY REALLY THINK THEY DO.

2) Most drugs aren't social- I don't really take dissociatives around other people as I find it annoying to have to deal with other people while on them. Because no one else I know is really into dissociatives I don't discuss my experience very often, so people don't know generally know that I take a lot of dissociatives. Similarly, I don't really get into social situations when I'm on opiates as noddiing during conversations isn't exactly fun for either person involved. The only drug I really take that is social is weed, so consquently everyone knows I smoke.


3) I just have a tendency to lead double lives and drugs have played a major part in this, I think that being a drug user has reinforced my tendency to control who knows what about me, that being an opiate user or a dissociative user is just an excuse that I use with myself to justify keeping people at a distance from myself. To be honest I really wish that there was someone who I had full-disclosure with, who I could just tell everything to so that I could have an 'objective' observer to just keep tabs on my usage to make sure it doesn't spiral out of control.

Ironically though, most people think that I'm a hardcore needle user because I'm the one who tells people where to get needles if they ask and teach them about wheel filters and that so that people don't lose their arms because they decide to shoot some ritalin on a whim- harm reduction- if you're going to the needle bank is next to winz in town. I'm not actually a IDU, I don;t have a 'problem' with it as a ROA, I just hate having someone else shoot me up (fuck I hate that shit, I hate it so much- I understand why people ask, but I just wish they wouldn't) and I really don't enjoy doing it to myself as my hands constantly shake and always have for reasons unknown. I'd rather just plug things (using syringes/drawing needles), easier.
 
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