DeathIndustrial88
Bluelighter
Last week I met a guy.
He was 25 (I'll be 40 in a couple years)... and had like an 8pk abs. Blonde hair, blue eyes, very tall.
Just the most beautiful guy I have seen in years & years.
And he was into me & wanted to cuddle & got hard almost immediately.
But I couldn't get hard AT ALL. And I don't know why. I think it was a combo of the fact that I was so nervous & couldn't understand how some one so attractive could want ME. I was also pretty sedated on bupe, gaba & bud that afternoon.
I think it's also cause I've done adderall like every weekend for the past 6 weeks, which makes me horny, but then I feel depleted during the week & have no sex drive.
Before my little adderall spat, I could easily get a boner & had a normal sex drive, even on buprenorphine & benzos.
Other than stopping my adderall weekends, anyone got any tips on how to get my blood flow & natural sex drive back during the weekdays? I started taking nitric oxide boosters & L-tyrosine, but I dunno if that's gonna help. I hope I'm not getting like erectile dysfunction or something. I don't think that's what it is cause it feels more mental, like I couldn't focus on sex when I was with the guy & therefore couldn't get horny or in the mood really. Even though he was totally hot & wanting it.
I felt ridiculous not being able to get it up when I had some one so gorgeous on top of me. lol Like wtf.
I must be more attractive than I realize though if I can still pull in guys like that. I always have such low self esteem & think everyone's gonna think I'm ugly. But obviously I turned him on if he got hard within 60 seconds of laying down with me. lol
He doesn't do any drugs, not a meth head (thankfully) and was really chill & kind. Now I have a crush & I don't wanna harass him or scare him off by trying to text or talk to him too much.
Why do hot gay guys do that though? Why do they hook up & then go quiet like this? Any gay guys on here know? lol It's not like he thought I was ugly or anything or he wouldn't have been so into me. But before we hooked up, we'd talk a few times a day at least. And now I barely hear from him.
It usually goes one of two ways.... I meet a person, I'm not attracted to them, but they're attracted to me & then they stalk & harass me every day to hook up.
Or I'll meet a guy & I'll think he's dropdead gorgeous & wanna get to know him & talk & hang out, but he'll go quiet & act weird. I don't get it.
Why can't some one I find attractive start stalking & harassing me instead? lol
He was 25 (I'll be 40 in a couple years)... and had like an 8pk abs. Blonde hair, blue eyes, very tall.
Just the most beautiful guy I have seen in years & years.
And he was into me & wanted to cuddle & got hard almost immediately.
But I couldn't get hard AT ALL. And I don't know why. I think it was a combo of the fact that I was so nervous & couldn't understand how some one so attractive could want ME. I was also pretty sedated on bupe, gaba & bud that afternoon.
I think it's also cause I've done adderall like every weekend for the past 6 weeks, which makes me horny, but then I feel depleted during the week & have no sex drive.
Before my little adderall spat, I could easily get a boner & had a normal sex drive, even on buprenorphine & benzos.
Other than stopping my adderall weekends, anyone got any tips on how to get my blood flow & natural sex drive back during the weekdays? I started taking nitric oxide boosters & L-tyrosine, but I dunno if that's gonna help. I hope I'm not getting like erectile dysfunction or something. I don't think that's what it is cause it feels more mental, like I couldn't focus on sex when I was with the guy & therefore couldn't get horny or in the mood really. Even though he was totally hot & wanting it.
I felt ridiculous not being able to get it up when I had some one so gorgeous on top of me. lol Like wtf.
I must be more attractive than I realize though if I can still pull in guys like that. I always have such low self esteem & think everyone's gonna think I'm ugly. But obviously I turned him on if he got hard within 60 seconds of laying down with me. lol
He doesn't do any drugs, not a meth head (thankfully) and was really chill & kind. Now I have a crush & I don't wanna harass him or scare him off by trying to text or talk to him too much.
Why do hot gay guys do that though? Why do they hook up & then go quiet like this? Any gay guys on here know? lol It's not like he thought I was ugly or anything or he wouldn't have been so into me. But before we hooked up, we'd talk a few times a day at least. And now I barely hear from him.
It usually goes one of two ways.... I meet a person, I'm not attracted to them, but they're attracted to me & then they stalk & harass me every day to hook up.
Or I'll meet a guy & I'll think he's dropdead gorgeous & wanna get to know him & talk & hang out, but he'll go quiet & act weird. I don't get it.
Why can't some one I find attractive start stalking & harassing me instead? lol
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