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Annoying friend zone situation

A

alcoholic333

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 26, 2006
Messages
268
Location
Los angeles
So I was at a bus stop boxing day at 9 pm and a cute girl comes and sits right by me and makes small talk , we talk for ten minutes ,

bus comes I go ahead and walk to the back by myself , she looks around fr a seat then says "guess I'll just sit with you" and sits right next to me, there were plentyof seats

We talk for half hour, good connection, I have to leave first and naturally hand her my phone and say punch in your #, she says she had a texting app for her iPod an took my number instead

The next day she texts saying hey its me from the bus. I reply with oh glad you contacted me hows your day going, or something like that. She says "it's fine, just though I should tell u I'm in. A relationship, didn't know if I should tell u on the bus, just so were
On the same page"

I say well you should of told me because I guess I had the wrong idea

She says, well does it really change anything? I tell her a new friend is ok but a single girl is nicer. Then she asks it's up to me if I wanna be Friends or part ways. I haven't answered. She is cute and nice to talk to and would date her in the future, does that sound like she is interested or should I just let it go?
 
Well no she's not interested, or she wouldn't have told you she's in a relationship. Respect her boundaries, don't push it. Up to you whether or not you wanna be friends with her regardless, without looking for more.
 
alcoholic333 said:
So I was at a bus stop boxing day at 9 pm and a cute girl comes and sits right by me and makes small talk , we talk for ten minutes ,

bus comes I go ahead and walk to the back by myself , she looks around fr a seat then says "guess I'll just sit with you" and sits right next to me, there were plentyof seats

We talk for half hour, good connection, I have to leave first and naturally hand her my phone and say punch in your #, she says she had a texting app for her iPod an took my number instead

The next day she texts saying hey its me from the bus. I reply with oh glad you contacted me hows your day going, or something like that. She says "it's fine, just though I should tell u I'm in. A relationship, didn't know if I should tell u on the bus, just so were
On the same page"

I say well you should of told me because I guess I had the wrong idea

She says, well does it really change anything? I tell her a new friend is ok but a single girl is nicer. Then she asks it's up to me if I wanna be Friends or part ways. I haven't answered. She is cute and nice to talk to and would date her in the future, does that sound like she is interested or should I just let it go?
Click to expand...

If you like her then I would stay in good contact but put her on the backburner. That is somebody with potential for the future, but just stay your lane and find other girls. Pursue later
 
In the future, if you see yourself becoming friend zoned by a girl, try friend zoning her first (mentally) and see if she begins to show attraction to you. If not, at least you think of her as a friend now.

For your situation, it would be best to move on.
 
be her friend. see if she has single friends she can introduce you to. if she's attractive and friendly, her friends probably are too.
 
Stripes314 said:
If you like her then I would stay in good contact but put her on the backburner. That is somebody with potential for the future, but just stay your lane and find other girls. Pursue later
Click to expand...

this

add her on facebook and keep an eye on her relationship status but for the mean time find other girls to be interested in as shes a future maybe. anyone in a relationship is not good to be pursuing
 
It's up to you. I have been in this situation (as that female) plenty of times. I am just being friendly, talking with someone (usually a guy), and they ask for my number. I don't try to act flirty or anything as I am in a relationship, but they get the wrong idea. I always feel bad but I am never sure if the guy is hitting on me or just being friendly so I just try and be nice and friendly in response.

Adding her on facebook is a good idea. Also getting an idea of how serious the relationship is. I mean, if they've been together for over a year, I wouldn't be hopeful or anything. But if they've just been dating for a month, I wouldn't go actively pursuing her, but I wouldn't dismiss the idea right away.

But having a new friend isn't bad. I mean, she can always introduce you to other girls.
 
I always had this peculiar idea that -gasp- making a new friend was a desirable and beneficial thing! But as I said, it's a peculiar idea and I am masochist, so I find such exquisite pleasure in the sheer agony of meeting up with someone to go smoke shisha and talking smack, have a beer with, or otherwise interacting in a recreational and social manner. This however is true if and only if I'm not romantically or sexually involved with them.
 
^hahaha

OP - let it go if you are not mature enough to jam with her as a friend...

If you're hanging out, and she learns that you're the coolest guy she has ever met and falls madly in love with you, well - you would be stupid to miss out on this chance just because you didn't wanna be friends to start with, right.
 
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