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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

Scared All the damage drugs did may kill me.. struggling heavy with physical health

nznity said:
@OpiateKiller shit man, idk what to say.....I feel exactly the same way as you, I think we are even the same age iirc. (I'm 27), I've ravaged my body from all the years shooting drugs, snorting, smoking, etc. I empathize with you bro, you're not alone. I'm fighting a really tough battle with my mental and physical health atm too. I send you a big hug, brother
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Thank you dog and yes we are exactly the same age 27. Hoping we can get through this shit. I just wanna go back and change everything I’ve done wrong but I can’t.
 
JuncoPartner said:
I stared having fits 12 years ago and yours sound like how mine started that's all
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I’ve come to the conclusion I’m having panic / anxiety attacks which Google says is the body entering a fight or flight response. It can cause numbness anywhere in the body.

I’m gonna talk to my doctor tomorrow. The problem is I can’t even take a benzo if needed I’m in a sober house.
 
OpiateKiller said:
Thank you dog and yes we are exactly the same age 27. Hoping we can get through this shit. I just wanna go back and change everything I’ve done wrong but I can’t.
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Same bro, I'm having bad PTSD from all the shit I've done in the past, I'm 27 but feel like a 40 yo(even though I look like 20-23 xd).I even have flashbacks sometimes from all the retarded shit I've done to sell drugs....begging, stealing,hustling, etc. What a fucking lousy life tbh but I'm hanging in there, hope u can cope with all the damage done too . 🙏🤍
 
nznity said:
Same bro, I'm having bad PTSD from all the shit I've done in the past, I'm 27 but feel like a 40 yo(even though I look like 20-23 xd).I even have flashbacks sometimes from all the retarded shit I've done to sell drugs....begging, stealing,hustling, etc. What a fucking lousy life tbh but I'm hanging in there, hope u can cope with all the damage done too . 🙏🤍
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You just gotta be proud of the progress you've made man. We both do. I mean you had a raging crack or cocaine habit right? You haven't touched it lately right? that's incredible in itself just like it's incredible I got off fentanyl again. It's amazing were still here and maybe we got scars but at the end of the day if we postively change and get through it were gonna be better stronger people for it. The best people have the most messed up pasts I firmly believe that.

I get it the other day I was having flashbacks of my car accident crash that sent me to jail and I was feeling so guilty for smashing off cars. Like dude if someone hit my car and kept driving I would chase them down and attempt to hurt them severely. But that's what I do to other people and they don't do that to me.

We gotta forgive ourselves and be gentle cause we can't change the past all we can do is try to change now and hope it works out.

I'm with you though brother always if you ever need anything let me know.
 
OpiateKiller said:
You just gotta be proud of the progress you've made man. We both do. I mean you had a raging crack or cocaine habit right? You haven't touched it lately right? that's incredible in itself just like it's incredible I got off fentanyl again. It's amazing were still here and maybe we got scars but at the end of the day if we postively change and get through it were gonna be better stronger people for it. The best people have the most messed up pasts I firmly believe that.

I get it the other day I was having flashbacks of my car accident crash that sent me to jail and I was feeling so guilty for smashing off cars. Like dude if someone hit my car and kept driving I would chase them down and attempt to hurt them severely. But that's what I do to other people and they don't do that to me.

We gotta forgive ourselves and be gentle cause we can't change the past all we can do is try to change now and hope it works out.

I'm with you though brother always if you ever need anything let me know.
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Yep, clean from a massive crack habit and a nasty iv morphine dependence for 16 months so far. Ty mate.
 
Well they've definitely got worse but my drug (ab)use has aswell. Had CT scan all normal bloods taken or given haha. Kidney liver all that shit functioning well.
I try and make sure I'm on benzos all the time and if I run out then drink.
 
sedgewick1 said:
I've had weird shit happening with my legs for the past several months. It manifests primarily when I'm coming down from stims or MDMA. When I get out of bed after lazing around for a while I get this really weird feeling in my head (not really dizziness) that I find hard to describe. When this feeling strengthens my legs start jerking back and forth with a high amplitude and then I fall. I've fallen more times than I can count. Luckily I haven't cracked my head open on furniture edges, but I have hit my head on the floor causing a pretty high flow of blood , and have gotten severe muscle pulls. I think this might be due to low blood pressure coming off stims? I'm not sure. Is low blood pressure even a thing coming down from stims? I don't get if from down-flavored drugs.

Now I'm pretty careful getting up. First I sit at the edge my bed for a bit. Then stand up and grab hold of a bedpost for a while. If I'm detecting the head feeling, I'm close enough to the bed to sit back down. Once I get the head feeling I know it's going to result in a fall if I start walking around. It's hard to walk around when it starts and I grab onto the nearest thing, but this doesn't really prevent the fall from happening.
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This sounds like it's probably from your potassium levels going out of balance from stim use. Back when I didn't know shit about the effects it has on your electrolytes (nor did I care to think about it because young, dumb and reckless 😬), I started getting small seizures after blasting hot rails for a few days without taking care of myself at all. Needless to say, I educated myself after that and now I take some vitamins/supplements as well as making sure I hydrate and eat since I'm able to eat like normal now whenever I take a trip to Shardsville, Iceland 💎
 
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