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alcoholism thread

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"thats the best part of my 10 days off, in a few more days i can start binge drinking again with no consequence, always a plus"


I hate to mention this but there is a consequences of binge drinking -- your body ,people around you --I hope you find some inner peace ,ablitiy to live with your self --best wishes



I once taped (videoed) my mom for 3 days when she went on a tear --she was shocked at they way she acted, at the things she said and did and the worst the stuff she didn't remember --half of it ,she passed about 6 months later combo of Halcion ,Booze and Valium -

-I'm not sorry and nor should anyone else be she is out of her hell ,I'm left with what if s?? I do miss her once in a while but I hate to say it was almost a relieve not worrying about how she would hurt herself and others next .
 
Fuck. Miserable. Can't stop now I started. Feel as though I'm shoving a knife into Zophen's back. Fuck-me. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck...
 
you can stop --not for anyone else but your self ,you need your own reason ,

in the end there will only be you --judge and jury--you've recognized the problem --thats half the battle


so you fucked up ,try again ,beat yourself up for what ??--did it help last time no so try another route --

its a release ,just need to exchange release --
 
Kerrigan said:
If that weren't true, I'd laugh.

usdathashield: Should I give up hope with you? You don't seem to want to listen to any advice, though you certainly like to talk. What are the chances of you keeping off tthe drink, even for a little while longer, just as some sort of challenge?

Afterwards you can tell yourself that your willpower is strong enough; that you've managed to succeed where others haven't, and that you have not ruined the life ahead of you.

Since I've decided personally to watch over this thread (admin rules changing) I am obliged to speak to you about your problem, just it seems as though you wouldn't want the help of this forum and won't listen to anyone.
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it sounds weird, but its like there is a little me inside my head watching all this happen in second person, recoiling in fear.. i mean ive almost died already... it doesnt sink in at all, or hasn't yet.

as soon as i fix my big problem, ill be happy again. and i gotta get back in school..

ive thought about inhalants and crack but crack is not the drug to drown your sorrows in

im staying off crack now simply as a financial decision

$10 crack=15 min amazing high
20 bottle of vodka=3 hour high (no fiending like a bitch and no crack headism)
2.99 300mgs of dxm=4 hour high (totally lost its magic but still ok):\ :\
 
There'll be fog on the shore tonight, Bosun! Keep your anti-intoxicant-attitude, usdathashield; it's very fetching. %)
 
God .. day two; crappy weather, nothin to eat ... this sucks!!

blahhh .. if i go to grab some food, i'll just have to grab liquor ... i hate this :(
 
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^fuck no you wont

i know my drinking is not on par with some, but i was still a problem. a problem i was able to overcome because finally i saw the big picture. cliche for sure, but no one is going to stop you, or even can stop you, except yourself. and even then, its not going to happen unless you see some worth in yourself and in the life you are leading.

for me it was school, and the desire to not be a failure at life (im on my fucking way though, to be sure). love for my fam, friends, and myself.

whatever it is that you value most in life is getting the shit kicked out of it on the daily by the booze. i mean, honestly, does anyone function at even half their potential when they are drunk all the time?? hell no!

so you say, "i have no potential." bullshit. we all can do anything we want, if we want it enough, every human on this planet. and i would venture to say that most of us bler are amung the better half of the population, so really we have no excuse. for the love of yourself, get up, get out, and fucking live!
 
God .. day two; crappy weather, nothin to eat ... this sucks!!

blahhh .. if i go to grab some food, i'll just have to grab liquor ... i hate this

I hear you. Get on the phone and call people. It can interrupt the cycle sometimes. FWIW.
 
Knowing that any substance touched will be done to the hilt ,took a few years to figure it out --some people firgure it out with years of alcolhol other with a combo of narcotics and alcohol or Barbiturates whatever the mix ,once you realize you could overdue a frickin shopping trip ,your presented with a realization --I don't know if its in the genes ,a freak of nature ,a government experiment whatever it is society call it addiction ,if you look some have exercise addiction ,eating addiction ,shopping gambling ,anything done to excess is labelled addiction so Ive noticed the whole world has so form of something the overdue a wee bit --if one can find a balance ,that they can live with --maybe getting off on fixing car ,learning about our cultures, planning and little goals helped me --I went Thur the booze, the work,the dope ,pills and gambling ,exercise extremed each one to the fullest ,each time hurting myself and or people i cared about ,used convectional methods --A.A whatever for the fellowship but actually only realize how to combat the problem when it was broken down --I was escaping and or looking for a certain feeling /escape something that turned me on ,enough to stay away from the others

I made little challenges within, work ,schooling ,myself --no big things that would stress me out ,all along gaining power .I had slips or whatever the word you want to call it but just right back to it
I didn't say I'm never drinking again ,I'm never doing x x x again.

I just worked on something else ,found collecting 100year old fixture's ,cleaning them up ,gave me a thrill ,researching them ,next was a car (1987) lebaron convertible redid that ,was awesome to accomplish ,little things gardening and volunteering really help ,seeing people who needed more than me and being able to give them help Thur a food line soup kitchen whatever --slowly it came to where I didn't need the booze ,the other substances to make myself feel something different --In the morning I wake up and smile, tell myself its going to be a good day

I'm not going into the bad shit that happened ,the losses, the toll,the sick days , I paid for my "addiction " we all know what that entailed --focus on the future make, no promises ,and dont lie to yourself ,find the p[roblem then find solutions not band -aids long term solution --reward your self

Beign able to volunteer really help ,a really good feeling --

By making many little things part of my life, I dont focus on just one thing now

Best wishes to all still suffering
 
One more thing look at the positives ,I have a roof over my head I have a job ,I have money to buy food ,I am not the only one who will work thur this :|
 
slowly it came to where I didn't need the booze ,the other substances to make myself feel something different --In the morning I wake up and smile, tell myself its going to be a good day

^ being sober is great .

*hands and feet clapping*



=D
 
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^^ That's what I do, too, actually. I am always trying to reinforce to myself how great everything is. Even if there's reason to think it's not great, telling yourself it is and smiling and being nice and happy to others makes it pretty damn hard to be miserable!
 
^ good for you xorkoth . i find it is very hard for me to be like you ( life ..you know)

keep up the good work

:)
 
I am always trying to reinforce to myself how great everything is. Even if there's reason to think it's not great, telling yourself it is and smiling and being nice and happy to others makes it pretty damn hard to be miserable!
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It's the only way forward I find !
 
Xorkoth said:
^^ That's what I do, too, actually. I am always trying to reinforce to myself how great everything is. Even if there's reason to think it's not great, telling yourself it is and smiling and being nice and happy to others makes it pretty damn hard to be miserable!
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I honestely feel this way 80% of every day .. it's just the nighttime + darkness I can't deal with :(

But I got so tweaked out from coffee today, alcohol never crossed my mind .. that's three days now. A 6-pack of quality brew to stretch out the week and I should be golden!
 
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