alcoholism thread [merged]

Status
Not open for further replies.
I finally stopped being a pussy and started my naltrexone yesterday morning. I'd been drinking heavily all weekend so I had severe withdrawals once the naltrexone kicked in. Unfortunately this occurred while I was driving to work. I had to pull over on the highway and throw up for a while, I was shaking too much to drive so I just had to sit there with the air con blasting at me and ride it out.

Got to work late, had to make up some lame excuse, while I'm standing there shaking and all hunched over...suspiscious much?!

Had a few more spews but eventually settled down by about 1pm. This morning I took the naltrexone at 4am and slept through the withdrawals so I'm fine today.

It was amazing though, I'm still not sure if it was a placebo effect but yesterday I DID NOT CRAVE ALCOHOL ALL AFTERNOON/EVENING!!! I seriously cannot remember a single day of my adult life that I didn't crave alcohol. It was amazing. I was on a complete high purely from the happiness of not craving alcohol. I even went for a run and had a salad for dinner.

I was thinking about it later in the evening, and whilst I was still THINKING about drinking and how it would feel to have a drink, I wasn't physically craving it, and didn't want a drink. Very cool.

This evening will be interesting, if the same thing happens I will be ecstatic. =D
 
n3ophy7e said:
I finally stopped being a pussy and started my naltrexone yesterday morning. I'd been drinking heavily all weekend so I had severe withdrawals once the naltrexone kicked in. Unfortunately this occurred while I was driving to work. I had to pull over on the highway and throw up for a while, I was shaking too much to drive so I just had to sit there with the air con blasting at me and ride it out.

Got to work late, had to make up some lame excuse, while I'm standing there shaking and all hunched over...suspiscious much?!

Had a few more spews but eventually settled down by about 1pm. This morning I took the naltrexone at 4am and slept through the withdrawals so I'm fine today.

It was amazing though, I'm still not sure if it was a placebo effect but yesterday I DID NOT CRAVE ALCOHOL ALL AFTERNOON/EVENING!!! I seriously cannot remember a single day of my adult life that I didn't crave alcohol. It was amazing. I was on a complete high purely from the happiness of not craving alcohol. I even went for a run and had a salad for dinner.

I was thinking about it later in the evening, and whilst I was still THINKING about drinking and how it would feel to have a drink, I wasn't physically craving it, and didn't want a drink. Very cool.

This evening will be interesting, if the same thing happens I will be ecstatic. =D

You hang in there friend (and that's an order). Best of luck <3 <3
 
n3ophy7e said:
I finally stopped being a pussy and started my naltrexone yesterday morning. I'd been drinking heavily all weekend so I had severe withdrawals once the naltrexone kicked in. Unfortunately this occurred while I was driving to work. I had to pull over on the highway and throw up for a while, I was shaking too much to drive so I just had to sit there with the air con blasting at me and ride it out.

Got to work late, had to make up some lame excuse, while I'm standing there shaking and all hunched over...suspiscious much?!

Had a few more spews but eventually settled down by about 1pm. This morning I took the naltrexone at 4am and slept through the withdrawals so I'm fine today.

It was amazing though, I'm still not sure if it was a placebo effect but yesterday I DID NOT CRAVE ALCOHOL ALL AFTERNOON/EVENING!!! I seriously cannot remember a single day of my adult life that I didn't crave alcohol. It was amazing. I was on a complete high purely from the happiness of not craving alcohol. I even went for a run and had a salad for dinner.

I was thinking about it later in the evening, and whilst I was still THINKING about drinking and how it would feel to have a drink, I wasn't physically craving it, and didn't want a drink. Very cool.

This evening will be interesting, if the same thing happens I will be ecstatic. =D

That's brilliant, well done. I sincerely hope it works for you and you don't get any nasty side effects. Keep me updated :) <3
 
Good luck Neophy7e. I hope everything pans out for you the way you want it to. <3

As for me, well, I just got my 2nd DUI. Nobody was injured, I didn't wreck, nobody ran into me, but still. I had it coming. Since my first DUI back in 06(I was 18, I just turned 21 a month ago), it was a sobering experience. But eventually I started drinking again. Albeit, I didn't drive, I was still drinking, if not more than what I was before. Well, a year later, I was back to drinking and driving again. I thought, as long as I was careful, I'd be ok. This last Thursday, I was pulled over for going 55 in a 45, and was arrested for drunk driving. I blew a .21. Hammered. :(

They say, people who get 1 DUI(which ALOT of people do, suprisngly), learn from there mistake, and move on. For me, I did learn. But after 2 years of having a clean record, I thought I was invincible again. I really, really wish I didn't have a problem with drinking. I mean, for the most part, I DON'T. I'm sober throughout the week, then get busy on the weekends. And I have fun! I don't crave it, my life isn't hell without it, its just too much fun!. They say, though, that people who get 2 DUI's, have a problem. Well, I must have a problem, or else I wouldn't have gotten behind the frickin wheel while being that drunk. THIS SUCKS. I just wish I could have a few drinks, then fuckin take a taxi or somethin. DAMNIT.
 
Thanks so much Agent <3

As for you, I'm sorry to hear you got caught again. But more importantly than "getting caught", it's that you went against what you told yourself you would do. What can you do to keep your own promises??
 
I'm not ready to quit drinking, but then again, with 2 DUI's under my belt, maybe I should? Or just drink at home? Things are going to be a littler easier, however, as I won't have a license or a car for 12 months.

I dunno. My court date's 10/10/08, so I have to be sober until then at least. Things are really catching up to me, thats for sure.
 
Methacontin we call the 750ml bottles here 26 ozers. I used to drink atleast 1 and sometimes 2 of those a day or more often id just get a 40ozer and drink that. My favorites where whiskey, rum, vodka and occasionally gin. Towards the end i usually drank liquor instead of beer since liquor is a less expensive drunk and gets you drunk faster.

I totally fucking miserable back then. I get episodes of real bad depression now but i was way worse back then and used to pass out alot of nights hoping i wouldnt wake up. I drank to feel better but i was a fucking mess. It makes my bipolar much worse and looking back i self medicated a hell of alot.

I gave it up when i was 21 which is 5 years ago now. I would be dead, in jail or close to death now if i had continued the way i was going. I certainly would not have lived past the age of 30. I have gotten drunk maybe 6 or 7 times since i quit and i have the odd drink now and again but nothing like i did before. I did start to slip up again last spring and early summer but i havent been drunk or had more then one or 2 drinks since june.

Alcoholism was way worse then me then being addicted to opiates. Atleast with opiates you don't do any damage to your body, i can function and not look impaired and i don't get violent or psychotic and get into trouble and i don't have to have a few drinks the next day so i can stop shaking.

Get some help man life is actually worth living even though it gets really really shitty sometimes. God knows ive come really close to suicide many times but you just have to find a reason to live.

Best of luck to you man.
 
I think I might have a problem with binge drinking. I drink about 15-20 bourbon and cokes every friday and saturday night. I've been drinking for close to 3 years but only this intense since i stopped smoking weed about 5-6 months ago.

I don't really crave alcohol so to speak, I just crave any altered state of consciousness. I know I drink to escape my life alot of the time because i hate my life at the moment. Once i drink more than about 8 drinks I just cant stop and I drink until all of my money is gone and then try and conceive ways to get more fucked up. I never feel drunk enough unless I'm passed out.

Do I have a problem? I don't really crave a drink during the week, just an altered state of consciousness. Is it possible to have an alcohol problem despite not drinking everyday?
 
paranoid android said:
Methacontin we call the 750ml bottles here 26 ozers. I used to drink atleast 1 and sometimes 2 of those a day or more often id just get a 40ozer and drink that. My favorites where whiskey, rum, vodka and occasionally gin. Towards the end i usually drank liquor instead of beer since liquor is a less expensive drunk and gets you drunk faster.

I totally fucking miserable back then. I get episodes of real bad depression now but i was way worse back then and used to pass out alot of nights hoping i wouldnt wake up. I drank to feel better but i was a fucking mess. It makes my bipolar much worse and looking back i self medicated a hell of alot.

I gave it up when i was 21 which is 5 years ago now. I would be dead, in jail or close to death now if i had continued the way i was going. I certainly would not have lived past the age of 30. I have gotten drunk maybe 6 or 7 times since i quit and i have the odd drink now and again but nothing like i did before. I did start to slip up again last spring and early summer but i havent been drunk or had more then one or 2 drinks since june.

Alcoholism was way worse then me then being addicted to opiates. Atleast with opiates you don't do any damage to your body, i can function and not look impaired and i don't get violent or psychotic and get into trouble and i don't have to have a few drinks the next day so i can stop shaking.

Get some help man life is actually worth living even though it gets really really shitty sometimes. God knows ive come really close to suicide many times but you just have to find a reason to live.

Best of luck to you man.
Thank you buddy. Good read. Best of luck to you as well
 
Things are looking better! Haven't been drinking near as much as I have been lately, and everything is starting to come together as far as my overall well being. Took some 2C-B this last weekend and had just an incredible spirtual experience. Really gave me a chance to analyze everything in my life, and see where I need improvement. Definitely a positive experience.

Been going to AA recentely, and suprisingly enough, its helping! So thanks for the suggestions everyone.

Oh, and thanks Neop7e for the compliment in ED Pic thread. You're pretty dang cute yourself. ;) <3
 
Teehee thanks hun! <3

And that is excellent news Agent, I'm so glad you're turning things around for the better. Us humans are capable of some amazing things if we try.

Me on the other hand, I've had a fucking SHOCKER this week. I didn't drink anything for a whole week last week, then this week I drank every night again. Fucking hopeless. I'm trying to drink only on the weekends but I'm afraid that I'm going to have to totally quit drinking for good. I'm really scared of that cos I don't know who I am as a person without alcohol...

I've been beating myself up pretty bad this week cos I started drinking again. I felt like a complete failure, a fraud. I was even to the point of having suicidal thoughts 2 nights earlier in the week. I've been desperately wanting to harm myself every night this week, but luckily I have a boyfriend who is very switched on to my emotions, and can tell when I want to cut myself before even I can tell! And he stays up with me so I don't do it. I'm very lucky to have him. <3
 
What really helped me, is some guy in AA said "Don't drink and drug a day at a time"

For some reason, that just stuck. We're here for ya <3 <3
 
hold in there...

n3ophy7e said:
Teehee thanks hun! <3

And that is excellent news Agent, I'm so glad you're turning things around for the better. Us humans are capable of some amazing things if we try.

Me on the other hand, I've had a fucking SHOCKER this week. I didn't drink anything for a whole week last week, then this week I drank every night again. Fucking hopeless. I'm trying to drink only on the weekends but I'm afraid that I'm going to have to totally quit drinking for good. I'm really scared of that cos I don't know who I am as a person without alcohol...

I've been beating myself up pretty bad this week cos I started drinking again. I felt like a complete failure, a fraud. I was even to the point of having suicidal thoughts 2 nights earlier in the week. I've been desperately wanting to harm myself every night this week, but luckily I have a boyfriend who is very switched on to my emotions, and can tell when I want to cut myself before even I can tell! And he stays up with me so I don't do it. I'm very lucky to have him. <3

I know how it feels when, after a period of hope, life seems to fall into familiar, depressing patterns (I can relate this to my GAD/obssessive worrying). I also know what it's like to have to find out who you are without alcohol. Both these things are really hard but they can be navigated. First of all, you are doing your best so stop beating yourself up. What happened with the naltrexone?

My counsellor said something insinghtful to me this week. I told her that it was difficult maintaining good friendships now that I have cut down drinking, and that I realised I needed to work on those friendships. She said that things could end up more interesting this way. Although, as you know, I do not see complete sobriety as an option for me, there are advantages of being sobre and one of those is that is interesting to find out how things REALLY are. For you I imagine it could be an enlightening experience to find out who you are without alcohol. Have you tried any sort of psychedelic therapy?

As for me, I am doing well at the moment. I seem to be sticking, for the first time, to my proposed drinking schedule. I allow myself to drink as much as I like one day every two weeks, with no drinking in the meantime. I am feeling much better for this! Yet I still get to get drunk. Such a plan is almost certainly not suitable for everyone; my main problem with alcohol is physical dependence (withdrawal) rather than psychological although there is of course some degree of psychological addiction as well. I do not doubt that I will not stick to this plan forever, but I am managing it at the moment, so that can only be a good thing. :)

edit: I must give credit to another bluelighter, BlackOut, for giving me the idea of this schedule as a way to reduce severe rebound anxiety and other WD symptoms from drinking.
 
Spurs_1882 said:
I know how it feels when, after a period of hope, life seems to fall into familiar, depressing patterns (I can relate this to my GAD/obssessive worrying). I also know what it's like to have to find out who you are without alcohol. Both these things are really hard but they can be navigated. First of all, you are doing your best so stop beating yourself up. What happened with the naltrexone?

My counsellor said something insinghtful to me this week. I told her that it was difficult maintaining good friendships now that I have cut down drinking, and that I realised I needed to work on those friendships. She said that things could end up more interesting this way. Although, as you know, I do not see complete sobriety as an option for me, there are advantages of being sobre and one of those is that is interesting to find out how things REALLY are. For you I imagine it could be an enlightening experience to find out who you are without alcohol. Have you tried any sort of psychedelic therapy?

As for me, I am doing well at the moment. I seem to be sticking, for the first time, to my proposed drinking schedule. I allow myself to drink as much as I like one day every two weeks, with no drinking in the meantime. I am feeling much better for this! Yet I still get to get drunk. Such a plan is almost certainly not suitable for everyone; my main problem with alcohol is physical dependence (withdrawal) rather than psychological although there is of course some degree of psychological addiction as well. I do not doubt that I will not stick to this plan forever, but I am managing it at the moment, so that can only be a good thing. :)

edit: I must give credit to another bluelighter, BlackOut, for giving me the idea of this schedule as a way to reduce severe rebound anxiety and other WD symptoms from drinking.
It sounds like you're doing really well Spurs! That's so awesome. And thank you for your support and words of encouragement. <3

I'm still on the naltrexone and still managing to drink through it. Last week the naltrexone was fantastic and I was SO ecstatic at it's effects. But for some reason this week it's all gone to shit. Something funny I said to my best mate before I started the naltrexone: "If there's anyone who can really test the sobering effects of naltrexone, it's me" haha, and sure enough! Hmmm not the best attitude to have starting a new medication huh...

I'll start again (not drinking) as of Monday.

As for the psychedelic therapy, no I haven't considered this yet, and perhaps I should! Good tip Spurs...I'll look in to it...
 
Spurs_1882 said:
edit: I must give credit to another bluelighter, BlackOut, for giving me the idea of this schedule as a way to reduce severe rebound anxiety and other WD symptoms from drinking.

You're welcome, Spurs, I'm very happy it works for you too. Just gotta stick to it, and we're good!

I surprised myself yesterday after drinking 3-4 beers or so in the afternoon, and then just stopping, with no cravings whatsoever. I can't remember the last time that happened. Very satisfying, and it reassured me that I'm doing the right thing.
 
I've still been drinking most every day ... 2-4 drinks or so, luckily not heavily.
But for a long while now, I've been sure I do not like alcohol ... but it's always just a few blocks and dollars away.

Tomorrow a good friend of mine is moving in; he's been a raging alcoholic in the past.
He apparently got kicked out of his Aunt's place, as she has the same problem.

If he tries to stay sober, I think I might have a good shot at it .. but if not, no way ..
 
yeah man awkward situation when its your friends. how is it working out so far?

as for me, im off to rehab again. alcohol poisoning, again lol.

shame and pain (hey that rhymes) to my family again as i ended up in the suicide ward (again).

my mom and i are getting kicked out of our apartment cuz the ambulance had to come pick me up when i got the poisoning. my mom is like having a total nervous breakdown right now. i gotta get things right.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top