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Alcoholism discussion thread v. 5.0

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If your addicted to drinking and get decent withdrawals. I would try getting on a long acting benzodiazapine such as Valium or Librium. You can switch onto those and gradually taper off. It's way to hard on your body quitting drinking cold turkey when your body is psychically addicted.

This will help your body adjust. It will also give you a little bit of what you need to get through the day.

I would go on a low dose and keep in mind that it will build up in your body after you take it for a few weeks. Unless you plan to do a short taper which is still a better idea then cold turkey. I understand some wouldn't want to become dependent on something else and I would never promote going on benzos. But if your already drinking heavily it would benefit you to at least do a 2 week taper.
 
Sepher, I agree mate with a lot of that. Although in my case I do/was get genuine visons sometimes when I try and get sleep. Ugly, distorted faces etc. A bit gargoyle-ish. It doesn't happen evry time I detox but it is enough to make one scared to even try sleep.

I hear you about the work thing too. I'm going to go in and try and hide the smell of alcohol on my breath today. Little do they no I'm only drinking 'cos I was rattling a bit and need to have an eye opener to put a good face on at work.

I'm pretty much on my final warning too, and will miss out on quite a nice Army pension if I fucked it all up. Luckily the bosses at work see it as a medical problem I have to try and overcome, rather then is just standing by me enough to see what I do next.

I'm on the forces redundancy list this year and seriously thinking about volunteering for redundancy. Then they cannot threaten me with leaving on a medical discharge (and missing out on the fat pension). But that's not a decision I want to take lightly.

I just kind of wish it hadn't happend to me, as there are plenty of people at work who would probably see it as weak because they can go and get drunk on a night without feeling ther compulsion I do. Somewhere along the line my drinking has changed from being 'one of the lads, down the bar every night' to being something that depresses me, fills me with guilt and is wrecking me emotionally. If I coudl turn back time I wish I could go back any give myself a talking to before I started drinking compulsively, but I'm not sure if the 25 year old me would listen. :-/

Oh, well. some counselling and a lot of AA mettings might help me pick myself up again.

Edit: I think I'm gonna taper off it this weekend amd hopefully be dry by Sunday night, ready for work on Monday. It's something I've managed before but it requires a bt of self control.

I'm not drinking insane amounts, but I think I've managed to put a 70cl bottle of Smirnoff away per day for the last couple of days, and a couple of cans too over the space of a whole day.

If I can drink only half a bottle of vodka and space it out over the course of a whole day it should let my body recover gently. Luckily I'm not driving tanks, operating machines or anything like that at work. ;-/

Edit: miscalculated on the booze, I've still got half of a bottle of Smirnoff left so it's lesst than I thought.
 
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Just give it time. Once you decide you want to change everyday you can become a little stronger. As time goes on you'll start to feel better and better the longer you can make it without having a drink. It will be tough at first but once you get to about 1 month it will become easier to keep going. Then eventually you'll just feel good being normal. At that point you might feel like you can drink again. It's probably best to give it up for a few months and then you can always try to drink responsibly. But you know how those stories end "I thought I could go back and just have another drink" and then they dont stop haha.

Eventually you'll get to where you want to be if you actually try to give it up. You dont have to be hardcore AA person the rest of your life. Just use it for what it's worth to help you quit then move on.
 
Yep, I know what you mean. I've been doing AA for a couple of years and had a 7 month sober period last year, but my other attempts have been only a month or two months here and there.

I know in the back of my mind that I can never have 'just one drink' but the classic alcoholic in me always forgets that when I have been sober a few weeks and life is looking pretty good. It's kind of weird to think that I must stay vigilant for the rest of my life and it makes you wonder if one can ever be happy. Because to be happy could require one to be unaware that he needs to stay constantly vigilant about having 'just the one drink'.
 
LaserHosen said:
I know in the back of my mind that I can never have 'just one drink' but the classic alcoholic in me always forgets that when I have been sober a few weeks and life is looking pretty good. It's kind of weird to think that I must stay vigilant for the rest of my life and it makes you wonder if one can ever be happy. Because to be happy could require one to be unaware that he needs to stay constantly vigilant about having 'just the one drink'.
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I can't do total abstinance. Not at the minute anways, and God knows I've tried. Got myself put on Disulfiram ( Antabuse ) for most of last year but same pattern thoughout of me being able to go 3, 4 , 5 weeks feeling really quite good for it at first and a lot more together, only for the feeling that I'm deprived of something I should be able to have when the mood takes me as soon as I relearn some control and maybe it's been long enough by now to have got there. Rationally I know I'm playing with fire but at the moment I'm trying my best to manage it and limit myself to one heavy night of it at the weekend with a beer or two here or there mid-week. So far so good, but only because my g/f makes sure when she's out of the house through the week I don't have any money to blow on booze, though I'll borrow from work-mates and occasionally creatively juggle the till for the 4 or 5 quid I'm after for a drink. Crazy, risking my job abd a record when I've finally had all my previous convictions declared spent restoring a clean criminal record as far as most employers are entitled to concern themselves with that.
 
Well this has been one of the longest nights of my life. And I've done New Years Eve guard duty a couple of times :0/

What I can't understand is when we are so tired that we need just a couple of hours sleep our body says no and stops us from being able to rest. I've had about 30 mins sleep and woke up shaking ad feeling full of dread. Alcohol sucks.

I'm goigng to continue to drink though so that I can call the counselling welfare service at work and not go in like a shaky mess. Fuck 'em if they smell that I might have had a drink. This is my anxiety I am trying to control here with the only thing I have at the moment. :-/ God, I felt terrible when I woke up with a jump about half an hour ago.

I think it's hard for people tp understand why we consume the vrey thing that's causing us the problems just to feel well.

Sorry of this is turning into a blog, It might do someone some good.
 
Well I havent had a drink since about 5 hours ago and the shakes have calmed down. It's Friday night and I'm going to a meeting tomorrow. I still feel pretty depressed and a bit anxious though. This morning I drank about 4 shots of of vodka (finished the bottle off) and drank about 6 cans of cider (the cider was mainly last night when I couldn't sleep and was shaking. So even though it seems a lot it was drank over a 5 hour period or something).

Seeing as it's Friday night and I'm still technically withdrawing slightly I'm wondering If I should go and buy, say, 4 beers just to take the edge off and lift my mood slightly. Or does that sound like I'm making an excuse to drink? Would that ruin my quality of sleep later tonight? The AA meeting should help me make a new start at sobriety tomorrow.
 
Hiya Laser. Get through work ok with no dramas then? If your shakes have calmed down at last probably not a good idea you carry on drinking and kick them back up tomorrow. It is an excuse to drink but hey, only you know how you feel and whether you think a beer would be better for you than not having one. I doubt that'll be the case mind. Think you're better having a night off, get a sleep, be fresh for the meeting tomorrow.
 
Hi Sepher. Work wasn't too bad but I;m still in trouble for being drunk most of this week. It' took me five days to taper down from last weekends binge.

I saw my counsellor and we talked AA. She told me not to drink this weekend as well, so probably better to give it a rest tonight. I'm just feeling depressed and lonely but I suppose that's the remainder of my withdrawal.

Anyway, It's debatable whether |I could trust myself to only have 4 beers, so It's not work the risk.
 
Trouble is start drinking when you're depressed it tends to make it worse doesn't it? I do it myself. What happens is the first massive vodka gives me some instant feel-good, but keep going and I just get angry and frustrated with myself. Doesn't work. If you've got a long night in front of you at least you can come and chat shit on here for distraction. Be better for you I think doing that.
 
Sepher said:
Trouble is start drinking when you're depressed it tends to make it worse doesn't it? I do it myself. What happens is the first massive vodka gives me some instant feel-good, but keep going and I just get angry and frustrated with myself. Doesn't work. If you've got a long night in front of you at least you can come and chat shit on here for distraction. Be better for you I think doing that.
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Truth. At first the carefree effects of alcohol are apparent, but eventually I became ashamed of myself, everything I said and everything I had ever done while under the influence.

Alcohol free for a month.
 
Yeah, You're right. I'm just alternating between forums and YouTube and eating again. Eating's something that goes out the window when I drink, I don't know if that's what makes me get so sick.

It's really not worth the risk of me getting into trouble again. The only thing that might happen is I'll get a bit of a dodgy sleep tonight for the third day running.
 
That's cool Renz. Pleased with yourself much? Hope it continues for you mate. :)
 
Sepher said:
That's cool Renz. Pleased with yourself much? Hope it continues for you mate. :)
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A month is not a lot.
Especially for something that is everywhere and is socially encouraged for people my age.
 
Renz, it's better than an afternoon <-- me :)

I get ashamed of myself when drinking too, as I know what I am and I know it always turns out to be trouble.

It's like you know something for a fact but choose not to believe it.
 
Renz, a month is more than a plenty good start, for precisely the reason that booze is everywhere, and so normalized that saying you don't drink is seen as abnormal. You noticed much of a change in mood over the month? That's what frustrates me so much about my inability to go more than a month no matter what, cos my mood lifts right up and I enjoy the energy it gives me but still can't resist that little treat cos hey, I deserve it for going that long. Then it all breaks down and back to square one again.
 
Yeah, I've noticed that too., It's like you feel properly recharged after you've had a month of sleeping properly and eating regularly. It really works for your general hapiness. I used to think I had depression for years or bipolar or something. It's all bullshit. It's was just the amount of booze I was consistently pouring down my neck.
 
LaserHosen said:
Yeah, I've noticed that too., It's like you feel properly recharged after you've had a month of sleeping properly and eating regularly. It really works for your general hapiness. I used to think I had depression for years or bipolar or something. It's all bullshit. It's was just the amount of booze I was consistently pouring down my neck.
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I would fully support anyone who is drinking to excess everyday to deal with it and stop, it clearly isn't a great thing to do and doesn't do you health any good at all.

However having totally stopped drinking in July last year after 3 years of 1/2 a bottle of whiskey everyday (normal day some times more never less) my depression wasn't effected positively very much, I gained from it but my drinking was most definitely self medication for existing depression.

Alcohol is a depressant so giving it up can only do you good but I wouldn't want anyone pinning all there hope on it resolving their depression, I think in most cases its step, a good positive step that will really help you in the working on further steps forward into the sunlight.

Best Wishes and good on ya for your work so far, the road never ends its all learning for everyone depressed or not<3
 
Sepher said:
Renz, a month is more than a plenty good start, for precisely the reason that booze is everywhere, and so normalized that saying you don't drink is seen as abnormal. You noticed much of a change in mood over the month?
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I've lost weight (fat) and feel less anxious in person. Yes, it is strange to tell people that you do not drink, but I could care less how "fun" people think of me.

I have had more fun than they ever will. It's time to move on to something with real purpose than being loosened up 3-4 times a week on copious amounts of vodka.

In the year that I was drinking, I developed an enormous alcohol tolerance. I could never black out. I would drink and drink and drink. I have never vomited. It would merely make me feel and act stupider.
 
drinking to compensate for an opiate habit i am one month clean from

i have not drank this heavily on a daily basis in years (although i have been a daily drinker for years), wine is my saviour and nemisis at the very same time it seems
 
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