blahman8000
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Dec 3, 2009
- Messages
- 691
All the other times I've tried to sober up, there was this disappointment in the back of my mind, mulling over the fact that I'll never be able to enjoy alcohol again or drink like a normal person. I'll never be able to have another Friday or Saturday night where I can get buzzed with friends and then get back to a healthy life for the following week. But this time it's different. I don't want to get drunk anymore. Now I'm just glad I got all that drinking out of the way and I have a good reason not to touch it anymore. It's like I'm grateful to have been thrust into abstinence from alcohol (not having a choice at the time). Now that I've experienced sobriety and feel so much better (and I still have a while to go until I'm recovered from my health issues), I feel like I never want to put that poison into my body again. I don't want to get drunk again, I don't want to be hungover again, I don't want to puke up vodka again, I don't want to black out again, I don't want to act like a drunken asshole again, etc. With that garbage in the past, now I can focus on work, school, a good diet, sleeping well, exercising, making music, spending time with friends, and whatever else I want to do with my life. Alcohol took ALL of that away, and so much more. I no longer want to put anything in my body that will set me back or put my life on hold.
I went to an AA meeting last night. Didn't share but I listened. There are some people in there with decades of sobriety behind them, and they still keep coming. Hell, whatever keeps them away from the drink. They're an inspiration, and they know what they're talking about. I don't know if I can picture myself regularly attending meetings if and when I'm still sober 10 or 20 years from now, mainly because by then (and hopefully I won't ever relapse), I think I'll want to leave drugs and alcohol entirely in the past. If I'm remaining this focused and determined at turning my life around before I'm even one month sober, then I think after I have a few years under my belt, sobriety will feel less like a challenge and more like my true way of life.
I went to an AA meeting last night. Didn't share but I listened. There are some people in there with decades of sobriety behind them, and they still keep coming. Hell, whatever keeps them away from the drink. They're an inspiration, and they know what they're talking about. I don't know if I can picture myself regularly attending meetings if and when I'm still sober 10 or 20 years from now, mainly because by then (and hopefully I won't ever relapse), I think I'll want to leave drugs and alcohol entirely in the past. If I'm remaining this focused and determined at turning my life around before I'm even one month sober, then I think after I have a few years under my belt, sobriety will feel less like a challenge and more like my true way of life.