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Age difference/dating a younger girl?

methoxetaman

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 30, 2011
Messages
310
So I'm a 21 year old guy and I just got out of a shitty relationship with a girl I was with for 2 years, living with her and everything. I'm now living alone since she and my roommate all moved out a few weeks ago. I don't really speak to her anymore since she's with my ex-friend...


I recently reconnected with other people that I wasn't talking to because of my ex not letting me talk to my friends that were girls... it was a pretty controlling relationship. So anyway this girl I know and her friend B came over to hang out at my house, I've known B as a friend for like almost a year since she was friends with this girl and some of my other friends. She would be there when we would all get together to smoke, and the last time I saw her before my ex basically told me not to talk to those friends anymore we all went camping and tripped acid, I thought she was really cool and we were funny together trying to roll blunts and arguing over it. My ex apparently hated that I was being friends with these girls but shit I just saw them as friends thats all.

Anyway they came over to my house to hang out and I hadn't seen them for quite a few months and we had a good time smoking and making a fire and passing out watching tv or whatever.

B and I ended up laying together, at first just cuz there were only 2 couches so me and her were on the one, and it turned into us sorta cuddling. And then to my surprise she came onto me and started kissing me and stuff but she was tripping on mesc so I didn't really know what to make of it. But she's really cool and I'm single so I just went with it and kissed her back... We ended up in the other room on my bed and she wanted to fuck...

We even got naked and everything but I just couldnt do it... I was scared and confused and it happened so unexpectedly... I coulnd't get a boner.. I probably would have done it if i had one..... but my conscience told me nope. i mean she was tripping and it was the first time i'd seen her in forever and i didn't know how to take the situation.

So anyway we didn't do it, but we lay naked together all night while she was coming down off her trip..

I asked my friend about it, told her(my friend) that i was confused about B.. was she just tripping and being impulsive cuz she thought I was hot? or does she like me?

well my friend told me B definitely likes me and that even though she was tripping she knew what she was doing.

so i was like cool... maybe i should see where this goes.

so i've seen her a couple times since, she was here new years eve just me and her we drank a bottle of wine and kissed and ended up in bed again.. and i had a hard on at first but once we were actually about to do it i got nervous and mind started racing and i couldnt do it... she told me stop teasing her... and i just didn't know what to say then.

but then i told her i just wasnt ready... and she completely understood. she was very mature about it and didnt get all weirded out about it.

anyway i've been talking to her since and through conversation she mentioned her age...

shes only 17... and i didn't know she was 17. i thought she was 18..

she's about to turn 18 in a couple months though... shes not in school anymore.

i just turned 21.

sooo she's 3 years and a few months younger than me.

i don't know what to think. she's really mature and everything i don't see her as a kid. but it's a big age difference...

i guess i just want some feedback?

thanks for readin
 
this wasn't supposed to be about sex... i would want to connect emotionally with her before any of that really happens. she understands that too... but she says i temp her and it's hard for her to hold herself back. but am i going into bad territory if i start getting serious with someone this much younger than me?
 
3 years is not much...BUT it depends how mature you both are at the end of the day.

I'm kinda emotionally retarded by like 4/5 years, and 25 years old, and was seeing a 16 year old who is fairly wise for her age - stopped that however for other reasons.

It really does all depend on how mature you both are. If you were 21 and she was 16 the gap would be even bigger.

I'm sure it will be fine - just see where it goes, and don't think about ages - it's just a number after puberty.
 
My grandparents were 20 years apart in age. My current GF recently fucked a dude that was 10 years older than her... 3 years is nothing; but! an 18 year old girl is going to be infinitely more juvenille than a 21 year old. Just be prepared for drama and bullshit...
 
I don't think the age difference is a big deal. 17 to 21? Nah, not a big deal. My ex was 21 when I started dating him at 18. One of my big problems with him 10 years later was that he was the immature one with 0 experience with life and I outgrew him. That age difference isn't a big deal IMO.

I've dealt with men who couldn't get it up. It makes us women feel like something is wrong with ourselves. It wasn't until I started reading here that it could be something else, but even so, it's an awkward situation.

I like what another poster said and try to tame the sex and just hang out until you're more comfortable with her. Maybe you're still thinking about your ex? It hasn't been that long, and I know some men need some time between women before they can get hard for long periods.
 
3 years isn't a huge difference, but at 17-21, you're definitely at two different stages of life. on the one hand, if you just got out of a big serious relationship, it will probably be refreshing to be with someone a little more carefree. but on the other hand, you may eventually want the kind of relationship that might seem a bit stifling or "too grown up" for someone her age.

i started dating my girlfriend when i was 26 and she was 21, and had a similar experience. i loved being with someone so youthful and fun, as my previous relationship got really serious (and really boring) way too quickly. but at the same time, she was still in college and this was her first big relationship, so her friends definitely resented the fact that she was spending more time at bars and dinner parties with me and less time going to frats and tailgate parties with them. it's not like i wouldn't let her go, and i honestly had a lot of fun doing "college things" when we did, but people just have different social preferences when they're in a serious relationship, and it can alienate friends who don't understand.

anyways, it's certainly not a deal breaker, but be prepared for a little culture shock (and some raised eyebrows).
 
As long as it is legal. I personally am not into much older or younger guys but it sometimes works out!
 
So I'm a 21 year old guy and I just got out of a shitty relationship with a girl I was with for 2 years, living with her and everything. I'm now living alone since she and my roommate all moved out a few weeks ago. I don't really speak to her anymore since she's with my ex-friend...


I recently reconnected with other people that I wasn't talking to because of my ex not letting me talk to my friends that were girls... it was a pretty controlling relationship. So anyway this girl I know and her friend B came over to hang out at my house, I've known B as a friend for like almost a year since she was friends with this girl and some of my other friends. She would be there when we would all get together to smoke, and the last time I saw her before my ex basically told me not to talk to those friends anymore we all went camping and tripped acid, I thought she was really cool and we were funny together trying to roll blunts and arguing over it. My ex apparently hated that I was being friends with these girls but shit I just saw them as friends thats all.

Anyway they came over to my house to hang out and I hadn't seen them for quite a few months and we had a good time smoking and making a fire and passing out watching tv or whatever.

B and I ended up laying together, at first just cuz there were only 2 couches so me and her were on the one, and it turned into us sorta cuddling. And then to my surprise she came onto me and started kissing me and stuff but she was tripping on mesc so I didn't really know what to make of it. But she's really cool and I'm single so I just went with it and kissed her back... We ended up in the other room on my bed and she wanted to fuck...

We even got naked and everything but I just couldnt do it... I was scared and confused and it happened so unexpectedly... I coulnd't get a boner.. I probably would have done it if i had one..... but my conscience told me nope. i mean she was tripping and it was the first time i'd seen her in forever and i didn't know how to take the situation.

So anyway we didn't do it, but we lay naked together all night while she was coming down off her trip..

I asked my friend about it, told her(my friend) that i was confused about B.. was she just tripping and being impulsive cuz she thought I was hot? or does she like me?

well my friend told me B definitely likes me and that even though she was tripping she knew what she was doing.

so i was like cool... maybe i should see where this goes.

so i've seen her a couple times since, she was here new years eve just me and her we drank a bottle of wine and kissed and ended up in bed again.. and i had a hard on at first but once we were actually about to do it i got nervous and mind started racing and i couldnt do it... she told me stop teasing her... and i just didn't know what to say then.

but then i told her i just wasnt ready... and she completely understood. she was very mature about it and didnt get all weirded out about it.

anyway i've been talking to her since and through conversation she mentioned her age...

shes only 17... and i didn't know she was 17. i thought she was 18..

she's about to turn 18 in a couple months though... shes not in school anymore.

i just turned 21.

sooo she's 3 years and a few months younger than me.

i don't know what to think. she's really mature and everything i don't see her as a kid. but it's a big age difference...

i guess i just want some feedback?

thanks for readin

I would recommend a youngling very much.
Nubility is a very attractive quality, esp as you yourself get older.
And honestly its not that much of an age difference, give her what she wants.
Youd be foolish to pass up such a great op.
 
3 years is nothing, don't stress!

I could have hooked up with a 17yo on new years eve, she was hot and all over me. But 13 years younger than me and her name was the same as my daughter's only spelt differently. She gave me some premixed 60ml vodka shots that cost $1 each, never had them before, they come in test tube looking bottles and I gave her some bud in return. She gave me her FB and email and we ended up going our seperate ways.

I think I did the right thing thinking with my head instead of my cock, even if it has been a few months since I got my end away :)

Nope you did the wrong thing.
;)
 
well i never got with the 17 year old and my first girlfriend came back to me and wanted to make things better between us. so i'm back together with her now and our relationship is better than what it was. i guess i couldn't get it up for that younger girl because i was still in love with my original girlfriend
 
21 with a 17 year old no biggie. I just turned 18 in september but always been hit on by even older guys. When I was 16 a 22 and 25 year old wanted to be with me. I still talk to both now but I've also had a lot of 21 year old guys who wanted to be with me when I was 17... I think its not really taboo nowadays for older guys to hit on younger girls and if she's 17 its not really a big deal especially if she's going to be 18 soon. I'm not saying older guys should hit on younger girls but you aren't even that much older than her.
 
3 years isnt that bad. Im 24 and my GF is 21 and we get along great.
 
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