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Advice on going away/getting healthy for a bit (London area)

R

Rogg If

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 13, 2013
Messages
66
Location
London
Hi there guys

I won't tell the whole story but, in short, things are a bit shit and dull at the moment and I'm looking for a way out.
I live in London (like the title says), jobless, skint, and no money to pay next rent. I don't have that many friends cos I've either fucked them over or simply stopped seeing them a while ago. I don't really have any activities nor can I afford to have any. Basically, I'm bored shitless and spend my days in jacking up.
I'm not depressed but I'd like a change, most of all I'd like to get away for a while, a few months, to stop shooting up brown, bupe and various pills, cos I can't afford it anymore & I'm bored with it, you know, just go some place where I'd have nothing to worry about but work, like labourer, live-in jobs, or abroad, away from the city and my bad habits, work hard and think about things, about my life in general and in the process get totally clean.
I'm not worried about coming off stuff, it's the easiest part, just somewhere I can spend some time getting back to normal, then I could come back healthy and probably more serene.

If you guys have any advice, suggestions, or have done something similar before, I'd really like to hear you. Thanks in advance
 
first great thing is u want some change, changing environement if u can for sure will help you, what great is u can be good now, in your mind trying to realise what goes wrong, realise what need to change and make a plan about it, stick to it, at least the most u can, if u put ur energy in doing good it already the half part, the next one is to find what technique sucess on yourself
 
Thanks, exactly that's what what I wanna do, have some time to think about what makes me fuck up every time. Better to do it now that wait till I'm 30 and realize I've wasted almost 15 years of my life repeating the same mistakes. And yeah changing the environment is probably the best way I can think of to get rid of stupid habits i.e: needle fetish, etc
 
I think it's great that you're thinking of this change. I did something similar myself about 11 years ago and it was the best thing I could've done for myself. As nsa mentioned though, you should have a plan besides just moving away though. When I did it, I started working towards a new degree at the same time. This ensured that I kept myself busy and that I was working towards a goal. It doesn't have to be school, but if you can volunteer or do something else that will make you feel good about yourself and fill the void of drugs it will help you quite a bit! All the best wishes to you. <3
 
Hi guys thanks for your replies... Well yeah I wanna get on a course or something, learn things so I won't be stuck in dead-end jobs for the rest of my life... I'm a musician and I wanna learn mixing, and somehow get to make a living from sounds. Ambitions, see. Really, lots of things I wanna do, but I'm young and often act on impulses, so I haven't done much since I was 18 apart from getting fucked up or hanging with the "wrong" crowd. The only way to start a new, more productive life is to get away for some time I reckon.

Sorry for posting twice - Spork, how have things been since you did that? Did you fuck up every now and then or did it really work and change your life for good?
 
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I did fuck up occasionally, but it was different. I never went back to being a regular user of my DOC (meth) after I relocated.
 
Yeah I think if I do get away and get healthy then live a more normal life, I might have a few relapses but being a bit wiser and having a different lifestyle, I probably won't go too far. I'm really looking to get to that stage of awareness, that moment when things'll click in my head and I'll turn into a different person, a grown up and realize how ridiculous it is to be into drugs full-time, you know what I mean? Cos so far I dont think I've changed one bit since I was a teenagers and that really bugs the fuck outta me.
Any more advice?
 
Exactly, like Nick Drake sang "Everything's wrong and you know you're to blame, Nothing will change while you're still the same". I know it's not an overnight thing but, talking to older guys who just grew out of that lifestyle and totally changed the way they lived within a few weeks, it's usually a particular event that makes you realize it's bullshit. I mean, I've seen my best mate overdose when I was 19 (he was lucky enough to survive), put myself in some really fucked-up situations caused by being involved in drugs that could've ended up with me dead, and that "realization" still hasn't happened. Maybe I'm really too stupid ha! Which is why leaving the city and having a break seems the best option.
 
Yeah man, coming off is alright, at least I feel ok with it. But staying off them, spending weeks and getting bored senseless is much fucking tougher
 
^Boredom, or rather how to deal with it, is probably one of the most important strategies you can work on to change to a more sober life. My advice is to figure out what the high gives you when you feel bored--is it just a change and that is enough (then you won't be happy with work that is always the same), is it an adrenaline rush (then you need to find physical ways to challenge yourself), or maybe a flat out escape from reality (books, movies, getting out in nature and hiking)? Once you can figure out what you need you can make choices in life about how to meet those needs drug free. Whatever you need to do to get sober will help you establish new routines once you are. It's all just getting to know yourself when you come right down to it. I think your plan to get away and shake things up is a good one as long as you realize that you will still need to do the internal work as well. Good luck!<3
 
Hey Herbavore, thanks man, your post got me thinking a lot, there's a lot of truth in your words. I still can't figure out which one of the three it is, so far I've just kept telling myself I was doing it cos there's nothing else on offer right now - it's a vicious cycle, do drugs and lose interest in other things and other people, you end up having a pretty shitty life with fuck all going on so you keep sticking needles into your arms cos there's nothing else to do.
I'm defo not trying to escape reality - never have been, whether it was booze or drugs, on the contrary, it just made reality more interesting and I felt able to deal with things more easily. The former I know isn't true anymore, I've lots of self-confidence and know I dont need stuff to be more sociable or do things. It might well be the adrenaline rush, the feeling of immortality, as everytime right after I take opiates I feel the need to do something FANTASTIC, make great plans for the future, feel the need for some action. I love challenging myself indeed, to push my body to its limits. Gonna sound a right fucking idiot but yesterday after banging up I started fantasizing about booking a flight to Kiev and getting involved in those protests, helping the wounded and that...
Thank you so much for advice mate, I'll let you know as soon as I decide what to do.
 
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