I dont know if this is the adequate place to post this. I dont know even if it is thread worthy
I'm a guy in my early twenties. I have an history of several psychological issues that have been plaguing me since I was a kid, OCD, anxiety, depression, etc. I finished high school when I was 18 year old and since then I've been pretty much lost in life. When I finished high-school (wich was a miracle cause I was pretty much a juvenile delinquent) I did not proceed to go to a university or to work, like most do. I wanted to take a "half an year off", to "rest" and to "find myself". Well that half a year off turned into something like 15 months. Since then I took up a number of jobs and started four college courses, but I never stayed more than a few months on the jobs and did not finished any of the courses. During this time I hang around a number of friends that I had from high-school but then I started drifting away from them and todayt I'm pretty much by myself, without any friends.
I wasted much of those years behind a computer not doing anything useful or getting drunk on bars/streets.
The crazy thing is that I listened to people all my life telling me that I "had potential". And it is true, I always found it easy to learn about a a varitie of subjects. I passed difficult exams, won prizes in a few intellectual contests.
Even crazier is the fact that in the last couple of years I watched several people that I used to hang arround with, other misfits like me, start making something out of their lives, going to college, keeping jobs, getting girlfriends, competing in sports, etc. I didnt care when I saw "normal" people doing that because that is pretty much how it goes, but when you see other creeps that you thought were like you progressing in life while you're still on the couch it starts to bother you.
In the beginning of 2013 I started really trying to get out of this depressing situation. I started working in a fairly good job and have been for the past 7 months. The thing is: it is a massive struggle. I wake up in the morning everyday feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. It is really hard to get out of bed. I'm sleepy as hell and look like shit for the rest of the day. I'm easily distracted and forgetful Everything around me is boring or feels very foreign I have anxiety bouts. I feel lonely. I feel a dark, stark depression ripping thrugh my soul sometimes. The weekend comes and I never have anything to do socially.
The reason why this thread is called addicted to laziness/lethargy is because a big part of me misses being a couch potato all day with a computer and a TV to distract me, and NOT HAVING TO WAKE UP EARLY IN THE MORNING. I hate waking up early in the morning. I didnt have sleeplessness at night and sleepiness in the day.
Another big part of me likes the feeling of participating in society, seeing a lot of people everyday, having money, responsibilities, being useful, etc.
I see people often talking about drugs fucking them up to the point of them not being able to function in society with months or even years sober. Drugs were not the primary cause of what is happening to me (never used much). It seems like the virtual world of internet, at least 5 years of unscheduled sleep and bad attitudes is what got me here.
Does any one have similar experiences?
I'm a guy in my early twenties. I have an history of several psychological issues that have been plaguing me since I was a kid, OCD, anxiety, depression, etc. I finished high school when I was 18 year old and since then I've been pretty much lost in life. When I finished high-school (wich was a miracle cause I was pretty much a juvenile delinquent) I did not proceed to go to a university or to work, like most do. I wanted to take a "half an year off", to "rest" and to "find myself". Well that half a year off turned into something like 15 months. Since then I took up a number of jobs and started four college courses, but I never stayed more than a few months on the jobs and did not finished any of the courses. During this time I hang around a number of friends that I had from high-school but then I started drifting away from them and todayt I'm pretty much by myself, without any friends.
I wasted much of those years behind a computer not doing anything useful or getting drunk on bars/streets.
The crazy thing is that I listened to people all my life telling me that I "had potential". And it is true, I always found it easy to learn about a a varitie of subjects. I passed difficult exams, won prizes in a few intellectual contests.
Even crazier is the fact that in the last couple of years I watched several people that I used to hang arround with, other misfits like me, start making something out of their lives, going to college, keeping jobs, getting girlfriends, competing in sports, etc. I didnt care when I saw "normal" people doing that because that is pretty much how it goes, but when you see other creeps that you thought were like you progressing in life while you're still on the couch it starts to bother you.
In the beginning of 2013 I started really trying to get out of this depressing situation. I started working in a fairly good job and have been for the past 7 months. The thing is: it is a massive struggle. I wake up in the morning everyday feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. It is really hard to get out of bed. I'm sleepy as hell and look like shit for the rest of the day. I'm easily distracted and forgetful Everything around me is boring or feels very foreign I have anxiety bouts. I feel lonely. I feel a dark, stark depression ripping thrugh my soul sometimes. The weekend comes and I never have anything to do socially.
The reason why this thread is called addicted to laziness/lethargy is because a big part of me misses being a couch potato all day with a computer and a TV to distract me, and NOT HAVING TO WAKE UP EARLY IN THE MORNING. I hate waking up early in the morning. I didnt have sleeplessness at night and sleepiness in the day.
Another big part of me likes the feeling of participating in society, seeing a lot of people everyday, having money, responsibilities, being useful, etc.
I see people often talking about drugs fucking them up to the point of them not being able to function in society with months or even years sober. Drugs were not the primary cause of what is happening to me (never used much). It seems like the virtual world of internet, at least 5 years of unscheduled sleep and bad attitudes is what got me here.
Does any one have similar experiences?
