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Heroin 1st Time Heroin Near Death

1

1stTime LastTime

Greenlighter
Joined
Sep 28, 2012
Messages
4
So a a friend was telling me about a famous guitarist that was saying that if you really wanna create great music heroin is your drug. Being a musician myself this always intrigued me so I started researching this and found it for the most part to be true at least in the beginning stages of use. So intrigued by this I decided to try a .25 gram sample of afghan #4 that I bought from a site that I would buy small amounts of weed and hash from all parts of the world. This sample came from the Netherlands.
I have a little experience in opiates but only with percs (90 per month), 20 mg. Oxy's.
I decided to test this sample Saturday nite before the Bones Jones main event UFC fight. Wife was asleep and so were my 3 kids. I researched how much to use and was going to try a little bump the size of maybe 3 paper match heads long at a time every 10 mins. til I could feel where I wanted to be. Now up until this point I had 4 tallboys and watched a nite of UFC. So I did my 1st bump soon as the co-main event ended. I waited the 10 mins and didn't feel the rush or euphoria I was expecting so went to lay out another and a little too much spilled out so I made 2 piles larger than the 1st one I did maybe 4 match heads each and was only gonna do one and when it went up so quick and easy stupidly thought might as well top up right now so I will definitely feel it this time. The last text I sent my buddy was at 12:38 when Belfort almost broke Jones arm! The rest of the fight I have no memory whatsoever of! And I am a HUGE UFC fan!!
Fast forward to 6 a.m.. The wife finds me on the couch puke around my mouth and on my shirt. Says I was making funny sounds she could here from the bedroom. Tries to wake me and can't. Even to the point of pounding on my chest yelling WAKE UP! No Response! Says my stomach was making weird movements and sounds and when she laid me back my head was not fully reclined but sort of hovering (for lack of a better word) over the couch. Now it's 8 oclock and my 8 year old son is up. I somehow fall off the couch facefirst on the floor and I can start hearing things but still not able to move.
I hear my son say what's wrong with Dad? My wife says he just can't wake up right now. My wife is trying to hide her tears thinking I had a stroke! Writing this now is very emotional for me. My son is rubbing my back as I'm lying there not able to move. Finally I try to move and my wife helps me back up into a sitting position on the couch now my eyes are open but not able to see anything she tells me later that my eyes were light brown like she was looking right thru them. Probably because my pupils were so restricted. Finally after 8 a.m. I am starting to regain my hearing and sight but very slowly almost like I am looking thru bulletproof glass and sounding like it too. I am also starting to cough up hardened chunks of bloody mucus. My head is aching and I'm trying to convince my wife it's the flu. Even though in this impaired state I am well aware that I escaped death! She helps me to the bedroom and I'm walking knocking shit off the walls like I'm on a real bad drunk.
I am writing about this for several reasons. One being that I'm hoping by telling someone about it that I can relieve some of the heavy guilt I feel about not only what I put my family thru but what I could have possibly put all of my extended family and friends thru! Another reason being that if I can save someone even one person from ever having to experience that near death then it will all be worth it!
I also have several questions for those experienced with heroin overdoses. Since I don't remember past the 1st round of the fight did I instantly collapse? At what point during that 8 hours was I closest to death? Is there any danger of the blood I was coughing up for the better part of 3 days clotting and going to my brain or heart and killing me? Why was I coughing blood? Should I tell my wife about it to clear my conscience? Should I find a counsellor or therapist instead to work thru this?
Sorry for the bombardment of questions but this has been a very traumatic experience and is still very fresh. I actually took the week off of work saying I had the flu.
Thanks for any advice and even if you wanna flame me a call me a dumbass it's ok too! I'm alive and presently no worse for wear other than a massive headache and sweating and puking and coughing blood for the better part of 3 days! Could be the best thing that ever happened to me as well since I didn't die and didn't like it!
Please if you are thinking about it like I was please use this as your sign NOT TO TAKE THIS DRUG!!
 
I got my first stuff on the street, and it could've been off the (similar random country place you use), and if it was I probably wouldn't be here. I'm glad your still around man, don't beat yourself up.
 
You could've aspirated vomit. I don't know the protocol for making sure you're ok besides going to a doctor, people have developed pneumonia and other respiratory ailments from events like this. I'd say your main mistake was mixing opiates and alcohol. For a first timer...or hell, for any of us-opiates mixed with alcohol are a no no, but especially for someone who doesn't have a tolerance. Hope you're feeling better, at least you woke up b/c many don't.
 
yeah man im sure those 4 tall boys really played a big part in this, but glad to here youre ok and learned your lesson.
 
Just wanna add man you coming into this with that thought process that heroin will make.you better at what you do will lead to disaster. I speak from.experiance I beleived it made me better at my job more focused and gave me that push to get me through my day I believe it made me more friendly and better able to deal with people. This lead me to being hopelessly addicted to the point where I lost my job.. so that beleif that it makes you better is garbage. It made me lose what I beleived it made me better at.. makes no sense.
 
Should have done more research. Not sure where you got "3 match size head bumps" every 10 minutes until you were where you wanted to be, but that was pretty damn wreckless. Unless you have a scale, you should start with ONE match size bump, at most every 30 minutes until you begin to get where you want. The first time you ever try heroin you should just be getting a feel for it, learn what kind if tolerance you really have, how potent your product is etc. You got reallly lucky from what it sounds like, they way you explained it, it sounds as if you were like potentially seconds away from death if your wife hadn't started smacking you. Why didn't she call an ambulance btw?

Next time, if you ever do attempt to try it again... either get an accurate milligram scale and start with a maximum of 10mg per 30 minutes. If no scale, then start with match size head bumps, the smaller the better because it can be really easy to over-eyeball powdered substances.

Oh and yea, definitely not the greatest idea to mix 2 litres of beer before experimenting with heroin for the first time...
 
hehe i know what site you use ;)
(as im sure most do)

edit : bit insensitive. I'm sorry about what happened - but what doesn't kill you . ...
 
I don't mean to sound harsh, truthfully this is coming from a place of love and concern for you and your family.

You were being completely reckless, almost to a lethal extent. Your reason for trying the drug was to....find inspiration? Mistake number one, that's a terrible (read: ridiculous) reason to use heroin. You have no experience with heroin, yet you drank four beers beforehand? Mistake number two. Then, as you have no way of knowing how potent the shit is, you separate your bumps by...10 minutes? Mistake number three. Triple that amount of time at a minimum, it takes a little while, even snorted to peak.

Truth be told you're very lucky you're alive. My primary question to you is; why didn't you come here BEFORE you began experimenting, and asked for specific advice? All three of those critical mistakes could have been rectified (at least two, for sure). Heroin is NOT the drug you want to take lightly, because as you just experienced, not taking extreme precaution as a novice almost cost you your life.

I truly don't mean to patronize you, or speak down to you, rather just reflect on the gravity of the choices you made and use them moving forward to never repeat these mistakes. Secondly, always ASK before you do when it comes to drugs, especially heroin. Heroin is a hell of a drug and you can never be too cautious with it. It's the reason this website exists. If I didn't find bluelight before my descent into Opiate darkness, I'd have probably killed myself by not knowing what I'm doing.

If your symptoms persist, I would absolutely get checked out by a physician. Whether or not you tell your wife is entirely your choice.

I'm really sorry for what you went through, but the silver lining is the valuable lesson learned about doing proper research before you experiment with a drug you're unfamiliar with, especially one as eminently hazardous as heroin.
 
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i'm assuming a tall boy is some kind of alcoholic drink? dude you idiot!

i've close OD'd twice, one was a normal shot after a couple beers. not drunk at all. bang, wake up a couple hours later on the floor. the other time was just a fat shot.

but even more for trying this! you've got a wife and three kids and presumably a pretty good job! why the fuck are you risking all that?

i can just hear the rationalisation now "it was just the alcohol that made it happen, i should just try it without alcohol 'just to see' what it's like"

that "just to see" left me with no money, bad health, injecting, absessces, and an addiction.
 
Of course with hindsight being 20/20 I know now what an unfknblvbl idiot I was!! Nothing anyone says here is going to hurt my feelings or make me feel as bad as the guilt I am presently trying to deal with. I am not religious by any means but it just feels like there was a higher power looking over me that night. I go from appreciating my family now to the point of feeling like every second with them is a bonus to picturing my funeral and my kids and parents faces when told of my death!
The best part I guess if there is one other than living thru it is the fact that I know I will never try heroin ever again! I have a hard enough time going without the percs and it's only 90 per month!
The research I did was obviously not in depth enough for a killer drug! I just found blue-light after wanting to tell my story to relieve the intense pressure of this deep dark secret! I actually think it has helped somewhat even though we have no previous connections whatsoever. Still find myself breaking down or overwhelmed with emotions several times a day. I talked to my son about what he saw and he said "Dad you wouldn't wake up I was scared".
As to why my wife didn't call an ambulance, she still thinks it had something to do with the flu that had went thru our family. She asked me if I was mad that she didn't call an ambulance and I told her no but if I am ever in an unresponsive condition like that to please call one! I asked her not to tell any friends or family about it so they don't grill her about not calling one and the real reason so someone doesn't put all the clues together and out me having an overdose!
So many mistakes made and still here telling the tale. Have got to be the luckiest man alive or is it divine intervention?
 
Reading this is actually helping me stay strong and quit, I find it hard to believe a site like this exists where they will mail you illegal drugs, you think this one would be easier for police.
 
WhoFalls said:
Reading this is actually helping me stay strong and quit, I find it hard to believe a site like this exists where they will mail you illegal drugs, you think this one would be easier for police.
Click to expand...

Yes, i heard this the other day and thought i misunderstood but now im like wtf, how does this concept work and make sense, real drugs of the interwebz, in some safe way that educated BL members would order? I must know more!
 
No need to call the op and idiot though, everyone makes mistakes. A tall boy is a 500ml can of beer, and his judgement after four was probably not thinking completly straight. The important thing is your alive :)
 
I think all the other posters pretty much covered it.

1) If you're opiate naive you really shouldn't be trying heroin. Especially since you got it online and therefore have no idea of the potency. People OD and die all the time from using dope that is more potent than they were accustomed to.
2) You say you take oxycodone (percs).. does that make you play better? I'm asumming it doesn't so why would you think H does?
3) If you're trying a drug with a dangerous reputation for the first time you should not be under the influence of anything else, ESPECIALLY not another CNS depressant like alcohol.
4) And the person above had a good point, if it was to improve your music why were you watching UFC? Just be honest with us and yourself... You do Percs and wanted to get higher so you tried heroin. Don't say it was for your music.

Heroin is an addictive drug that ruins lives and there's many reasons for people not to do it.. But I don't think your experience is one of them. Most people here on BL would educate themselves and never do what you did.
Do yourself a favor man and be a good husband and father and don't do anything like that ever again.
 
who the fuck told you heroin makes you a better musician, heroin is the downfall of great musicians. kurt cobain went from creative moody prick to just plain whiney moody prick when gear got hold of him. stick to cannabis and your family. christmas is coming up you undeserving selfish fuck, give your kid some memories for fucks sake
 
BlindHelperMonkey said:
who the fuck told you heroin makes you a better musician, heroin is the downfall of great musicians. kurt cobain went from creative moody prick to just plain whiney moody prick when gear got hold of him. stick to cannabis and your family. christmas is coming up you undeserving selfish fuck, give your kid some memories for fucks sake
Click to expand...

^ woah there. That's way too harsh. BL is supposed to support our members and offer HR advice. And if they need a wake up call sometimes okay, but it should be done politely.
That's way too harsh and he's not going to get anything positive out of that.
 
polite advice? are you for real. his kid couldve found the idiot dead. i found my dad dead on the couch and it was bad enough. im a heroin addict, i speak from experience. people like him who subject their families to their selfish whims should be sterilised. im no angel, but i would never bring a kid anywhere near that world, and im a scummy baghead. wheres YOUR moral compass? you cant handle everyone with kid-gloves. he needs a big fat reality check. i would kill for a loving family, at least have the respect to do it elsewhere than the family home. jesus christ youre all mad. liberal and mad
 
I was an IV heroin addict, I've been on methadone for 2 weeks now.
I didn't say you should handle him with kid gloves and I said a wake up call was sometimes necesarry.
My post above directed at the OP wasn't all rainbows and sunshine.

But cussing and calling the OP names isn't allowed at BL.
And it's just not productive. He's not going to listen to someone who's insulting him, he's just going to think you're an asshole.
It's better to give him advice that he can actually implement in his life and make a positive change for his sake and the sake of his family.
 
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