i got ridiculously fucked last night on some white wax paper blanks within unsealed plastic slips. It was three llamas for a bundle. My girl split one B with me, and I bought another half. I ended up doing around 9 bags and 2 perc 30s. The bags were just unbelievably off point. The 2nd bag I blew was giant, it had to of had the amount of 4 bags in it. Then the rest of the bags were either just a tiny bit off, or close to empty. The shit was tan, and I needed 2 bags to catch the first buzzing of the night. I regret spending so much but god, i haven't nodded like that since I scored that delicious white shit two weeks ago. Sat at my laptop with my eyes closing, head dropping, pulled it up, vision sucked, eyes closed, head dropped, rinse repeat in dream land. I woke up feeling an afterglow rather than feeling withdrawal this morning, but after an hour or so of being awake things got uncomfortable and I was so tired I ended up falling right back to sleep. Woke up 2 hours ago running eyes, running nose, uncomfortable, sick. Blew 1/2mg suboxone and I'm fighting the tiredness. Just got the direct connect from my middleman, the connect was itching to start going strait through me because he knows I'll be spending more. I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing... My girl ended the night on the verge of crying about her addiction. I promised her I'd stop allowing and facilitating her scores and use. Things dont look good for us.
Verso, thank you for the responses they have helped me understand the area and the trade a bit better than I did. I'm sorry about the prices, I even slipped up writing this post but I see it changed the dollar amount to "llamas" LOL! Anyways, thanks. I would have gone back to delete the prices in previous threads but it looks like they are gone. I am wanting to quit for a while, but, then again... Thats no different than any other day after I scored. I always want to quit for a while after a nice score.

We'll see... At the very least, I think its time to start making my use less frequent and maybe even hide it. If I test positive at the sub doctor 1 more time, its curtains for me. Curtains. Instant ticket to rehab, assuming I'll even be able to get into one. The insurance company just sent me a letter saying the co-pay will be "going up" which, I am afraid to find out what this means. Right now I rely on my mother to pay my dr visit co-pay and my pharmacy co-pay so, if it gets too high my mother wont be able to pay. My urine came back suboxone free the last dr visit, and I know it will be coming back suboxone free from my last visit as well, which is really worrying me. For now, I am holding on to the subs I've got because if I have to do an emergency taper, I need to have at least 60 pills I'm thinking. Wish me luck. Oh, the sweet poetic politics and drastic dramatic mathematical musings of a 21st century dope junkie.