king.snork1
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2014
- Messages
- 41
i was in amsterdam about a year ago (Age 17) and went to a party called "awakenings"
the pills going around at the time were called "orange red bulls" and my friend got a bunch of them for the party but recommended i only take 2/3 at the most over the course of the night (12 hour rave)..
i have since found out that those pills had dosages higher than 200mg per pill
before we went in we dropped a half each but as soon as i got in i got impatient, went to the toilet and dropped the other half of my pill
when i started coming up i took another pill and by the time the second pill hit me i was so far gone i didn't even realise how hard i was rolling so i took a 3rd followed by a 4th and then a 5th (i had all 5 within the space of about 3 hours)
i came up so hard i wanted it to stop but the roll just continued intensifying the rushes were insane and i could feel my heart beating through my rib cage to the point where i thought i was going to have a heart attack, it hurt..
i forgot how to speak dutch and understanding it was also a challenge (normally I'm fluent)
i began walking laps of the venue, my body was completely stunned, i was dragging my feet, my knees were weak and my arms were completely stiff and stayed wherever i put them if that makes sense (it was extremely difficult to move my arms from one position to the next and they stayed where i left them) i was unwillingly biting down on my jaw as hard as i possibly could (jaw lock) and my heart was pumping like id just run a marathon 10x over
i kept blacking out and finding myself in different situations which was terrifying, i thought my body was over heating so i took to drinking large quantities of water, it became an obsession to be constantly drinking water (this nearly killed me)
2 boys that i walked past during my laps of the venue saw the state i was in so they stopped me and asked me how much id taken, they were shocked when i told them and they took me to the chill out area and bought me a fruit cup, they gave me sugar capsules to try and slow down the ecstasy but i don't think it helped much, they asked me if i was going to be alright and i told them id be fine and thanked them for helping me so they told me to go to the first aid centre if i started feeling worse and left me to it.. i threw the fruit away (not because i was ungrateful, those boys probably saved my life) but i regretted even trying one piece of banana, and chewing was too challenging anyway
i resumed walking laps but got lost and the feeling was too intense, i began shaking and my knees gave way, i fell to one knee and threw up.. my vomit tasted metallic (i think it was from the pills) my eyes rolled back and i almost went into a seizure but somehow something inside me told me not to fall further than the knee i was resting on, i knew i was in serious trouble..
i remembered where the boys said the first aid area was so i dragged myself over there and i must have looked half dead because before i even said anything the first aiders rushed over to me and sat me down and began shining lights in my eyes, taking my temp. (this was extremely intense) and asking me questions about what id taken, when, how many, etc. i couldnt understand anything anymore so i told them i didn't speak dutch so they continued in english.. whilst i was in the first aid centre i began hallucinating, i saw a huge snake (it didn't scare me i just couldn't believe what i was seeing, i was in awe) and random objects in the room were constantly shifting positions
they were prepping me to take me to hospital when the rave ended and i knew that i needed to find my friends (they had no idea any of this had gone down because i lost them very early in the night) - i should have gone to hospital leaving the first aid centre was a terrible decision, they couldn't force me to go but they were practically trying.. i managed to break free and ran out of the centre into the crowd and tried to find my friends, i found them about 45 minutes after the party had finished and they were all mad at me for making them wait around when they'd all come down and just wanted to go home (not knowing anything about what'd happened to me over the course of the night)
--the comedown begins--
me and the friend i was staying with jumped in a taxi and headed back to her house, once in the taxi i started feeling ill and i have never needed to pee more in my entire life, we got close to her house when i jumped out of the taxi at a set of traffic lights and yelled back that id meet her back at the house whilst running towards the nearest tree to pee on, the walk home was a struggle but i finally got back and she'd already gone to bed so i went straight to my room and got in bed, i felt disgusting..
i was restless i couldn't stop moving around and i was sweating buckets, i wanted nothing more than to close my eyes and fall asleep but my mind was moving at a million miles an hour so this was an impossibility.. every few minutes id need to jump out of bed and run to the toilet to expel vast quantities of urine and puke clear liquid (which made me think back to how much water id actually consumed that night and I'm sure to this day that a few cups more would have become a toxic amount of fluids in my body and killed me)
the next few days were just as bad, nothing felt normal i couldn't concentrate on anything i felt sick constantly, i had hot flushes regularly and head rush every time i stood up from a sitting position.. i had no energy and i felt emotionless, i thought id done permanent damage and i was going to stay that way forever, murderous, suicidal thoughts followed..
after about a week things started to feel less weird and i stopped having blinding head rushes and paralysing hot flushes
but the emotionless state remained for months, i slipped into a dark depression - I've suffered from heavy depression all my life but this was like no other
its about a year later now and things have gotten a lot better but i don't think I'll ever totally recover from my trip to Amsterdam I'm learning to deal with it though, i still think back to that night all the time, it was the most surreal indescribable situation I've ever found myself in - it didn't even feel like real life at the time.
the reason i did such heavy quantities was to escape my mind, i just wanted to get messed up and forget all my problems, but i didn't realise just how wrecked i was going to get off those pills.. the trip to Amsterdam was an absolute bender that lasted about 7 weeks doing everything i could get my hands on partying for days with no down time but the awakenings night was when i called it quits and the rest of the holiday was spent lying around thinking about how insane the vacation had been..
since then Ive started to clean up my act and I've learnt my lesson about misusing and abusing drugs to the extent that i did in Amsterdam, although i have had a few rough emotional periods where I've just taken things way too far.. but on the whole i have a much more positive outlook on life now and I'm learning to deal with my problems in other ways
i don't ever recommend doing such a high dosage of MDMA, at the time i didn't even realise how strong the pills were
be responsible and look after yourself guys!!
the pills going around at the time were called "orange red bulls" and my friend got a bunch of them for the party but recommended i only take 2/3 at the most over the course of the night (12 hour rave)..
i have since found out that those pills had dosages higher than 200mg per pill
before we went in we dropped a half each but as soon as i got in i got impatient, went to the toilet and dropped the other half of my pill
when i started coming up i took another pill and by the time the second pill hit me i was so far gone i didn't even realise how hard i was rolling so i took a 3rd followed by a 4th and then a 5th (i had all 5 within the space of about 3 hours)
i came up so hard i wanted it to stop but the roll just continued intensifying the rushes were insane and i could feel my heart beating through my rib cage to the point where i thought i was going to have a heart attack, it hurt..
i forgot how to speak dutch and understanding it was also a challenge (normally I'm fluent)
i began walking laps of the venue, my body was completely stunned, i was dragging my feet, my knees were weak and my arms were completely stiff and stayed wherever i put them if that makes sense (it was extremely difficult to move my arms from one position to the next and they stayed where i left them) i was unwillingly biting down on my jaw as hard as i possibly could (jaw lock) and my heart was pumping like id just run a marathon 10x over
i kept blacking out and finding myself in different situations which was terrifying, i thought my body was over heating so i took to drinking large quantities of water, it became an obsession to be constantly drinking water (this nearly killed me)
2 boys that i walked past during my laps of the venue saw the state i was in so they stopped me and asked me how much id taken, they were shocked when i told them and they took me to the chill out area and bought me a fruit cup, they gave me sugar capsules to try and slow down the ecstasy but i don't think it helped much, they asked me if i was going to be alright and i told them id be fine and thanked them for helping me so they told me to go to the first aid centre if i started feeling worse and left me to it.. i threw the fruit away (not because i was ungrateful, those boys probably saved my life) but i regretted even trying one piece of banana, and chewing was too challenging anyway
i resumed walking laps but got lost and the feeling was too intense, i began shaking and my knees gave way, i fell to one knee and threw up.. my vomit tasted metallic (i think it was from the pills) my eyes rolled back and i almost went into a seizure but somehow something inside me told me not to fall further than the knee i was resting on, i knew i was in serious trouble..
i remembered where the boys said the first aid area was so i dragged myself over there and i must have looked half dead because before i even said anything the first aiders rushed over to me and sat me down and began shining lights in my eyes, taking my temp. (this was extremely intense) and asking me questions about what id taken, when, how many, etc. i couldnt understand anything anymore so i told them i didn't speak dutch so they continued in english.. whilst i was in the first aid centre i began hallucinating, i saw a huge snake (it didn't scare me i just couldn't believe what i was seeing, i was in awe) and random objects in the room were constantly shifting positions
they were prepping me to take me to hospital when the rave ended and i knew that i needed to find my friends (they had no idea any of this had gone down because i lost them very early in the night) - i should have gone to hospital leaving the first aid centre was a terrible decision, they couldn't force me to go but they were practically trying.. i managed to break free and ran out of the centre into the crowd and tried to find my friends, i found them about 45 minutes after the party had finished and they were all mad at me for making them wait around when they'd all come down and just wanted to go home (not knowing anything about what'd happened to me over the course of the night)
--the comedown begins--
me and the friend i was staying with jumped in a taxi and headed back to her house, once in the taxi i started feeling ill and i have never needed to pee more in my entire life, we got close to her house when i jumped out of the taxi at a set of traffic lights and yelled back that id meet her back at the house whilst running towards the nearest tree to pee on, the walk home was a struggle but i finally got back and she'd already gone to bed so i went straight to my room and got in bed, i felt disgusting..
i was restless i couldn't stop moving around and i was sweating buckets, i wanted nothing more than to close my eyes and fall asleep but my mind was moving at a million miles an hour so this was an impossibility.. every few minutes id need to jump out of bed and run to the toilet to expel vast quantities of urine and puke clear liquid (which made me think back to how much water id actually consumed that night and I'm sure to this day that a few cups more would have become a toxic amount of fluids in my body and killed me)
the next few days were just as bad, nothing felt normal i couldn't concentrate on anything i felt sick constantly, i had hot flushes regularly and head rush every time i stood up from a sitting position.. i had no energy and i felt emotionless, i thought id done permanent damage and i was going to stay that way forever, murderous, suicidal thoughts followed..
after about a week things started to feel less weird and i stopped having blinding head rushes and paralysing hot flushes
but the emotionless state remained for months, i slipped into a dark depression - I've suffered from heavy depression all my life but this was like no other
its about a year later now and things have gotten a lot better but i don't think I'll ever totally recover from my trip to Amsterdam I'm learning to deal with it though, i still think back to that night all the time, it was the most surreal indescribable situation I've ever found myself in - it didn't even feel like real life at the time.
the reason i did such heavy quantities was to escape my mind, i just wanted to get messed up and forget all my problems, but i didn't realise just how wrecked i was going to get off those pills.. the trip to Amsterdam was an absolute bender that lasted about 7 weeks doing everything i could get my hands on partying for days with no down time but the awakenings night was when i called it quits and the rest of the holiday was spent lying around thinking about how insane the vacation had been..
since then Ive started to clean up my act and I've learnt my lesson about misusing and abusing drugs to the extent that i did in Amsterdam, although i have had a few rough emotional periods where I've just taken things way too far.. but on the whole i have a much more positive outlook on life now and I'm learning to deal with my problems in other ways
i don't ever recommend doing such a high dosage of MDMA, at the time i didn't even realise how strong the pills were
be responsible and look after yourself guys!!
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