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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Random MSN Gibberings LXX: A little sexier than normal vomiting

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Yup! Pure Benzo powder without a very, very sensitive set of scales (so sensitive you could hurt it's feelings) is a perfect recipe for blackouts, ending up in a bush, a cell and just more general disaster
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It's ok I've had my fair share of them previously. Like doing half a gram in a day, knocking on old ladies doors thinking it was my mates house, loosing 10gs of MDMA crystal, blowing all my money only to get raped by a 32 year old mother of 2 (she was a munter aswell) and still being fucked til tuesday getting home 5 days after I went out.

My wallet still smells like meph, actually assumed that was what it was at first but it was 80mg of diaz powder. Took a dab then half of it in a bomb then dabbed the rest, nothing at all has happened but it definately tasted bitter like diaz usually does.

Might crack into a couple of beers. It will probably all hit me as I go out, lol!
 
^
So your not actually 100% sure its diaz?

How are you feeling now rockstar? You on the mend physically?
 
No after tasting it I am certain it is, it was just when I opened that little pouch in my wallet it stunk of meph. If I remember right though it was only costing £10-15 a g and a bit degraded or cut maybe even. So I've done 80mg we'll see how it ends up lol, I can defiantely feel it now.

Physically yeah catheter out back on monday, been getting back into the exerise regime, seeing a few mates etc. Still not 100% but getting there. Mentally it's alot better than it was, not something I will be forgetting and it is hard at times but I've just got to be strong about it. It's taught me a few lessons about some so called mates who were there. I'm just seeing it as something that's causing me a hard time but time will heal and I have to just come out the other end a stronger person.

I've been dying to get fucked this weekend and forget about it all for a little while. Sure the diaz and San Miguels will help!
 
Cheers Kate, it's only been a couple of months so I agree it's natural to still be in mourning but at the moment I can literally spend an entire day playing minesweeper then get pissed rather than engage in any of the work I am meant to be doing, I'm just distracting myself rather than getting on with things. I see that I shouldn't really beat myself up about it but it's having significant real world repercussions and I can't let that spin out of control any further than it has already. Yeesh. Done quite a lot of cleaning now, though, so that at least means a better environment and some sort of sense of achievement.

Hope your tensions pass and the world seems a less hostile place in the near future! Spare the kitten.
 
rockstar 69 said:
No after tasting it I am certain it is, it was just when I opened that little pouch in my wallet it stunk of meph. If I remember right though it was only costing £10-15 a g and a bit degraded or cut maybe even. So I've done 80mg we'll see how it ends up lol, I can defiantely feel it now.

Physically yeah catheter out back on monday, been getting back into the exerise regime, seeing a few mates etc. Still not 100% but getting there. Mentally it's alot better than it was, not something I will be forgetting and it is hard at times but I've just got to be strong about it. It's taught me a few lessons about some so called mates who were there. I'm just seeing it as something that's causing me a hard time but time will heal and I have to just come out the other end a stronger person.

I've been dying to get fucked this weekend and forget about it all for a little while. Sure the diaz and San Miguels will help!
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Good to hear you're physically repairing - you're young, this is all good. but take it easy - dying to get fucked and doing so will be hard not only on your body but mind. Be gentle please. An experience like what you've gone through with a friend will never leave you - such a horrible learning lesson for you all.

Take care and practise harm reduction eh, especially with the powder from the wallet! <3

I'm wafting up bergamont and lavender oils - such a gentle, nice way to lift the spirits and soothe %)
 
Mugz, both the Poppies I planted outside and the ones planted inside are flourishing. Yours is the most triffid like :D Will send a pic soon.xx

Sam I was in hysterics about your post.. When I go out I'm the Dancing Queen.. I got the moooves man!! Everybody is looking at me thinking ' I wish I could dance like that'.. Friends have told me I look like a Dad dancer but I think they are only jealous :D I'm sure you looked cool
though!

I think Rumplestiltskin had a Napoleon complex too. x
 
kate said:
Many thanks Monsta - lady issues are all natural and some wine, comfort-thangs ;), sweet-munches and lovely aromatherapy do the trick - tis short lived, long as all humans and cats keep out of my way for a wee bit 8) lol

How are you Monsta?
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Yer quite welcome missy :)
That sounds like a very good plan of action to merk the nasties away ;)

I'm doing quite well at the moment thanks :) Up and down days, ofcourse, but changing to Amitriptyline was a great move!
rockstar 69 said:
It's ok I've had my fair share of them previously. Like doing half a gram in a day, knocking on old ladies doors thinking it was my mates house, loosing 10gs of MDMA crystal, blowing all my money only to get raped by a 32 year old mother of 2 (she was a munter aswell) and still being fucked til tuesday getting home 5 days after I went out.

My wallet still smells like meph, actually assumed that was what it was at first but it was 80mg of diaz powder. Took a dab then half of it in a bomb then dabbed the rest, nothing at all has happened but it definately tasted bitter like diaz usually does.

Might crack into a couple of beers. It will probably all hit me as I go out, lol!
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Be fucking careful rockstar! Or I shall be very angry <3
Just pace yerself as, like you said, it could all kick in at once and you'll find yourself somewhere you'd rather not be :\
 
YellowPolkaDotHalo said:
Sam I was in hysterics about your post.. When I go out I'm the Dancing Queen.. I got the moooves man!! Everybody is looking at me thinking ' I wish I could dance like that'.. Friends have told me I look like a Dad dancer but I think they are only jealous :D I'm sure you looked cool
though!

I think Rumplestiltskin had a Napoleon complex too. x
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I didn't dance, just skulked around and eventually sat down looking as menacing as possible. But yeah, I can have my Dancing Queen moments too.

As for the Napoleon Complex bit... piss off. :D
 
jancrow said:
Cheers Kate, it's only been a couple of months so I agree it's natural to still be in mourning but at the moment I can literally spend an entire day playing minesweeper then get pissed rather than engage in any of the work I am meant to be doing, I'm just distracting myself rather than getting on with things. I see that I shouldn't really beat myself up about it but it's having significant real world repercussions and I can't let that spin out of control any further than it has already. Yeesh. Done quite a lot of cleaning now, though, so that at least means a better environment and some sort of sense of achievement.

Hope your tensions pass and the world seems a less hostile place in the near future! Spare the kitten.
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Sounds like you are aware of whats going on, half the battle - maybe some baby-steps back into daily routines and structure would help? Even if it's back to basics - it's a step in the right direction and may make you feel less bad about how your coping with your loss. Good on you for getting then energy to go for a big tidy up - having a nicer environment around you is an excellent good step forward.

I'm a bit old skool but things like proper nutrition, fresh air and some sort of daily schedule that you can cope with just now may help. But don't let yourself feel even worse if you really think this is pulling you down - it's natural but so is asking for some help. Nowt wrong with that, we are all human. Cuddles? get them - they help <3

The kitten is spared, for now... And so is my husband who is a very, very wise man! <3<3<3
 
I have a deep-rooted fear of women who are able to read my character with anything approaching accuracy. They're all witches.
 
Yeah Kate, you're right, I'm screaming out for a daily routine. Hard as I work from home and it's easy to kind of 'come to' with my coffee in hand and fuck all done at around 12pm and not have a clue what I'm supposed to be doing. Thanks for the words and ideas, it's amazing how much a few positive words can make the world a lighter place. <3
 
monstanoodle said:
Yer quite welcome missy :)
That sounds like a very good plan of action to merk the nasties away ;)

I'm doing quite well at the moment thanks :) Up and down days, ofcourse, but changing to Amitriptyline was a great move!
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I'm pleased to here the amitriptyline is working out for you - take it you have settled down on the right dose for you? Ups and downs are just the way off it - it's keeping the waves rounded and gentle not jaggy and epic?

Takes a while to get the "right one", then live with it, I empathise with you here :|

Any chance of some links to your tunes? I actually had a search for your music on google but lost my way - I'd quite like to listen to something ambient and amazing just now. Pretty please :)
 
SamhainGrim said:
I have a deep-rooted fear of women who are able to read my character with anything approaching accuracy. They're all witches.
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It's a shocker when you all of sudden realise you are not the only unique snowflake isn't it, we all are! The only witches you should worry about are the Macbeth types 8)

jancrow said:
Yeah Kate, you're right, I'm screaming out for a daily routine. Hard as I work from home and it's easy to kind of 'come to' with my coffee in hand and fuck all done at around 12pm and not have a clue what I'm supposed to be doing. Thanks for the words and ideas, it's amazing how much a few positive words can make the world a lighter place. <3
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Hard one to put into practise honey but baby-steps, little things and trying to keep them going and building on them will hopefully help. Discipline is a bitch and I'm grateful that my work (out of home) forces me into it, but you really shouldn't try to take on too much just now - wee steps eh. And when you've done that coffee and it's noon - do some other basics, build it up slowly and give yourself some breathing space to do so. Take it easy pet.

I've not marinated my beef yet - if I don't pull my finger out soon it looks like the "family" won't be having amazing homemade Chinese tonight! Maybe i should consider marinading overnight...8)
 
YellowPolkaDotHalo said:
ambient music, chinese and aromatherapy.. sounds lush round your house Kate :)

* pushes Sam over *
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Oops Hello Yellow, missed this - nice to meet you and it looks like you've already had a warm welcome into the EADD fold. Welcome, welcome...not many of us of the female persuasion here. Oral is my favourite sense etc etc =D

Pushing sam about is always good - hope you've got a good right hook kinda push ;)


Edit: Spade - don't know, I'm not here every day anymore.
 
kate said:
I'm pleased to here the amitriptyline is working out for you - take it you have settled down on the right dose for you? Ups and downs are just the way off it - it's keeping the waves rounded and gentle not jaggy and epic?

Takes a while to get the "right one", then live with it, I empathise with you here :|

Any chance of some links to your tunes? I actually had a search for your music on google but lost my way - I'd quite like to listen to something ambient and amazing just now. Pretty please :)
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Thankyou love :) Dosulepin was good, but it wasn't "strong" enough when it came to Antidep and Anxiolytic properties, so this has been ace. And yea I've become used to the right dose now ;)
And you hit the nail on the head - It's practically an emotional compressor but with more ups than downs.

Yea absolutely, some people go for years and years, through many, many different meds to find one that works for them, so I feel extremely fortunate to have found one that works.

I can indeed give you a link! :) Thankyou for asking for it hehe.
I'm unsure how much ambient stuff I've got on my soundcloud page at the moment (www.soundcloud.com/wrexile) but if you want any others then I could upload some more chilled stuff and send you the link :)

I have to agree too, Yellow seems to have fit in like a section of EADD-jigsaw ^_^
 
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