One of my friends told me to read this poem the other night. It made me cry.
Lady Heroin
So now little lady you've grown tired of grass,
Amphetamines, acid, downers, and hash.
Let me introduce you to Lady Herion...
Well honey, before you start to mess with me,
Just let me tell you how it will be,
I will seduce you and make you my slave,
I’ve sent men stronger than you to the grave.
You think you could never become a disgrace,
And end up addicted to poppy seed waste.
So you’ll start to inhale one afernoon,
Then you’ll take me into your arms very soon.
And once I’ve entered deep down in your veins,
Your life will never be quite the same.
You’ll need lots of money as you’ve been told,
For, darling I am more expensive than gold.
You’ll swindle your mother without thought or fear,
You’ll let your child starve if it gets you the ‘gear’
You’ll mug and you’ll steal for my venomous charm,
And feel true contentment when I’m in your arms.
The day when you know the monster you’ve grown,
You’ll silently promise to leave me alone.
You’ll think that you’ve got the mystical knack,
Well, sweetie, try getting me off your back.
The vomit, the cramp, your guts in a knot,
Your trembling nerves scream just for one more shot.
Hot sweats, the cold chills, the withdrawal pains,
Can only be stopped by those little grains.
There’s no other way, there’s no need to look,
For deep down inside you’ll know you are hooked.
You’ll give up your morals, your conscience, and heart,
And you will be mine
till death do us part.
From..
http://www.booksie.com/poetry/poetry/graeme_montrose/lady-heroin
Just after I copied and pasted this, a friend rang me to see how i'm doing and did I want to go over for a smoke, her treat, I've not decided yet, as I'm doing really well, but I secretly know i'll end up going over. She don't inject, so I'll only be smoking. She also said that the ring she gave me is worth 20 quid in smack converters iif i'm really desperate, but I can't ever sell my jewelry. I'm also trying really hard, just got some subutex from a friend which will hold me and mean I can sleep tonight.
My veins have sunk already, and it's only been a month and a half. Being covered in bruises aint a good look.