Here is my effort, to give the following some context you'd need to have read all of this thread:
http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/445374-(Nitrous-Oxide)-Experienced-Life-Changing-Problems?highlight=gascid
I know thats waaaaaay too much reading for most, but hey, if you wanna know the whole story it takes a bit of effort ;-)
The following will form part of a book I've started to write. As mentioned in the "other" thread feedback is welcome, to be utterly ignored or completely ridiculed is totally fine. I'm just sharing it, do with it what you will.
Here goes:
This book is not written for monetary profit. At most I imagine anyone who wants a copy will be asked for a voluntary donation and any profit from that will be directed at further research into attempting to prove the theories posited within these pages. I expect this research will not be finished in my lifetime, at the time of writing I’m hoping that another person or group will find it interesting enough to want to continue it.
It is firstly written to help with my own happiness and journey through this life. My happiness is impossible unless the people whom I know, love and respect the most are also happy. I will do everything in my power to help these people be happy however I realise I cannot force anyone to do anything they don’t want to do. I can offer them help, support, guidance in whichever way I reasonably can, however each individuals happiness is ultimately down to them. Every person has the freedom and power to do whatever they please. All people must realise that every action has a consequence and one of the most confusing things about life is to always be doing what you think is right and with the best of intentions, yet things still go wrong. This can lead people to believe there is no UC, after all, why doesn’t he reward people who always try to do their best? The reason why things go wrong, why innocent babies die, why people commit murders, rapes, terrible crimes is because all spirits were created at the beginning of the creation of this universe (many others also exist now, have existed in the past and will exist in the future). These conciousnesses or “spirits” all evolve at different rates. Though two babies may have been born at exactly the same time, would that necessarily mean that they reach exactly the same point in their lives at exactly the same time? Of course not. The same is true of their spirit as it journeys through the astral plane. Some evolve faster than others, I don’t yet know when or why, I only know that it happens.
All that we normally see is not all that is there.
Ask yourself, do I have faults? Do I have weaknesses? If the answer to either one or both of these questions is genuinely no, then you don’t need this book because you have already reached a state of total enlightenment and are at peace with everyone including yourself. You will have no desire which remains unfulfilled or isn’t obtainable at very short notice. If this is the case, you may as well stop reading. Now. All you need to do is pass this book onto someone else who you think might find it helpful, after all complete happiness is impossible unless you are spreading the joy you have to others. Whichever methodology you employed to discover your satisfaction, I congratulate you on finding it.
This book is not strictly going to be written by me, it is a collaborative effort which many people will have input. Everything in this book is simply theory, I am not pronouncing it as fact it is simply what I believe to be true based on my own experience. That is absolutely no
The word “God” is in-appropriate when attempting to describe what I shall from now on refer to as the Universal Creator or UC for short. In actual fact Universal Creator isn’t appropriate either, as He, She, whatever it is has so much knowledge and power and is so all-encompassing that a mere word doesn’t do it justice. But at least the term “UC” doesn’t conjure images in other peoples heads of an old man with a white beard, stories or “guidance” from supposedly holy books such as the Bible, the Koran, the Torah or that of any other organised religion in the world today.
I realise that I’ll be pacing my journey through this particular life much better if I take the slow, stable way through the universe. I suppose like many people, drugs like nitrous oxide have made me aware that what we see and experience in everyday life isn't everything, and I'm grateful for that insight. I also feel that nitrous oxide, psilocybin, LSD, mescaline and the like (all of which I've tried at one point or another) exist only as signposts. The real journey has to be taken without jet fuel, it has to be taken a step at a time, using one's own feet. [adapted from a nitrous trip report on Erowid by “diogenes”.]
I will use drugs again but never for the purposes of hedonism or to attempt to block out pain. They are only to be used as tools to aid my learning, and I understand my tools are delicate and fragile and over-using them will cause them to break. Not only that, but going too far with them will leave me in a position un-able to access them through lack of money, damaged health or removal of my liberty by those who do not understand the path to ultimate happiness, satisfaction and enlightenment. Psychedelic drugs are an aid to reaching a meditative state, not one of mental confusion where typically the only aim is to get fucked out of your mind. This might make you think you are happy and having a good time but what is actually occurring is that you are falling for a chemically induced illusion. It’s not real, all you are actually doing is blotting out the pain of your un-happiness. Even when you think you are generally happy – you have a home, you have a car, you have a partner whom you love, you have nice “things” and you appreciate your situation is better than many others in this world you have to consider whether you actually are. Although this life is extremely short when compared with the grand, universal nature of time, because time is relative it actually feels quite long to our consciousness when laid out over the course of an individual human lifetime. Therefore, don’t panic and be in a hurry to achieve everything you want too quickly. Of course, this doesn’t mean that action isn’t important – far from it. The way to achieve what you want is moderate use of psychedelic drugs in order to problem solve and aid with decision making. A key to aid entry into a meditative state. Ideally, I would like to imagine a future where I have no need to consume anything at all in order to receive wisdom from the UC, at the moment I have no idea if this will be possible but it is my goal to try. The answers you receive from the UC MUST be acted on, as constant thinking, only thinking achieves nothing. People who only act yet never think fail. People who only think and never act also fail. All things that are good in life are about balance and it is by learning how to balance thinking and action that happiness can be achieved.