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Bad Trips - Please Read

DiZzyBonne

DiZzyBonne

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 10, 2009
Messages
420
Bare with me because I'm definitely not sober right now. Has anybody else had more than one bad trip? If yes, do you feel that they're all EXACTLY the same way? Like good trips for example, no two good trips are the same. But on bad trips, I mean the really break you down and make you cry bad trips, does anybody else feel like they're all the exact SAME? Like it doesn't change at ALL? To me it feels that way, and it always becomes a sanity check.

As I said, I'm still not sober and I'm sobering up from a, what I call, BAD trip, but I'd really appreciate some input from the community. It's always something I've never been able to discuss around my friends because none of them have had bad trips, or multiple bad trips.

Also, on your bad trips, do you feel like everybody is playing one big prank on you? Like the whole WORLD is in on some massive prank, like you stepped into another dimension? Also, one thing I've noticed is on bad trips, your visuals change INSTANTLY, and my problem is, they all connect, so I start seeing the EXACT same things as before.

I think I'm typing too much so I'll let you guys have some input.

[EDIT]

I haven't proof read my post and it's too hard to right now, so sorry if it seems a little sloppy. If you need me to clear up things, please ask.
 
Usually around the same people. They start when I take them at home alone and I start talking to a group of "friends" online in a chat room. I know them in real life, I've told them about my bad trips, but it all started and revolved around them.

Today, it started when someone knew I was on 2C-P and I kept saying how hard I was tripping, then he just triggered it. I immediately called my REAL friends (my cousin and a really close friend that's pretty much family to me,) to come help me out and they immediately came to my rescue. Even around them though, the bad trip was manifesting itself and I noticed things that they would do and felt like they were in on some big massive prank out to get me. I told them how I felt and they understood, but in the back of my head, they're FAMILY and I KNOW for a FACT that they'd NEVER mess with me, hence why I called them. However, the beginnings of the bad trip helped influence that around them.

I can go on for days but my mind is really pooped right now lol.

[EDIT]

I guess thing is, I don't really like taking them alone, I like being able to talk to people but I like them to know I'm not sober and having a good time. When I take it at home, it's never fully alone because I always talk to people. So I guess it is party my set and setting, even though one's house is the safest place one could be. But at times, my house makes me feel like I'm going insane, even right now.
 
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DiZzyBonne said:
Usually around the same people. They start when I take them at home alone and I start talking to a group of "friends" online in a chat room. I know them in real life, I've told them about my bad trips, but it all started and revolved around them.

Today, it started when someone knew I was on 2C-P and I kept saying how hard I was tripping, then he just triggered it. I immediately called my REAL friends (my cousin and a really close friend that's pretty much family to me,) to come help me out and they immediately came to my rescue. Even around them though, the bad trip was manifesting itself and I noticed things that they would do and felt like they were in on some big massive prank out to get me. I told them how I felt and they understood, but in the back of my head, they're FAMILY and I KNOW for a FACT that they'd NEVER mess with me, hence why I called them. However, the beginnings of the bad trip helped influence that around them.

I can go on for days but my mind is really pooped right now lol.
Click to expand...

The problem sounds obvious here to me.
You have to be comfortable with who you are communicating with/ Around when tripping..

Ive heard many people warn me about tripping on my own, that its not good for my health.
I can only tell you this from info i have read (I read so much info and do lots of research and read lots of trip reports too but am yet to try acid)

But it sounds like you arent comfortable neither do you find these people friendly...
The fact you cant discuss your bad trippings . Sounds bad to me. My friends probably get fed up with me keep saying all my experiences and stuff but at least they listen to me
I K trip on my own. I like to do it in an open area, away from the world and just listen to hardstyle through my headphones and be at complete peace for a few hours or so.

What about Music?
 
Anything I listen to becomes very dark and evil, no matter what it is. Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd (although Floyd can get kinda creepy at times.)
 
I've tried all kinds of music, electronic is the worst for me during bad trips because they're really repetitive. On my bad trips I'm always 100% convinced I'm completely insane, even if I tell myself that it's a drug and it'll wear off. I've tried breathing, I've tried taking my mind off of them, but the more I try to forget, the more I start to notice things and my mind starts wandering and racing, and I start to think really sinister thoughts.
 
I still feel that the pros outweigh the cons, but I don't know. I think my problem is I take too much at a time.
 
if you feel you are taking too much then you should jsut restart the whole process of triping and rethink it.
never felt the need to take more of any psych, but i jsut worked my way up with doses. set low expectations and enjoy low level trips.
once you are familiar with that headspace, and with subsatnces and the whole tripping phenomena, you get a little bit more in control so there is less fear and anxiety of possible outcomes. so you never ereally lose yourself, or control.

ive not had disaster trips, but i did have difficult trips. however, with a little bit of control you can shift focus away from the bad and take yourself to a gentler place...
 
DiZzyBonne said:
Also, on your bad trips, do you feel like everybody is playing one big prank on you? Like the whole WORLD is in on some massive prank, like you stepped into another dimension? Also, one thing I've noticed is on bad trips, your visuals change INSTANTLY, and my problem is, they all connect, so I start seeing the EXACT same things as before.
Click to expand...

Yeah this sounds familiar, remember people are reflections of yourself. If you feel paranoid that paranoia will be reflected back through your environment, making it appear that the whole world is in on some joke.

I know what you mean by the change in visuals, I've had a few experiences where within the blink of an eye my entire perspective had switched from positive to negative, this is usually caused by the realization of some negative aspect of yourself which can be triggered through virtually anything. Synchronicity plays a big role here, you may hear a particular lyric in a song that reflects how you feel and in combination with your surroundings cause's you to question why your doing this to yourself which opens you up to the realization that your depressed in life and feel unloved all within an instant. It all connects up to a single point, which sparks a realization and that realization can determine the direction of the experience.

Some of my most intense journeys with psychedelics involved very heavy influences of synchronicity, and overwhelming feeling that everything in my entire life had been leading up-to this very moment in time.

My advice would be, pursue those negative experiences.. see where they lead you, the more you run from them, the worse they will become.. resistance to whats true only creates a more elaborate illusion, and consequently further suffering.
 
I get what you're saying, but it's a scary thought. Skeletons in the closet come into play during these bad trips, and it's something you just wanna forget about in general.
 
DiZzyBonne said:
I get what you're saying, but it's a scary thought. Skeletons in the closet come into play during these bad trips, and it's something you just wanna forget about in general.
Click to expand...

Yeah i can understand, unfortunately the purpose of psychedelics is to bring these skeletons out so that we may face them and absolve them as part of ourselves. If your still keen, take it slow.. after-all the experience is alot to take in, and on high dose's it just may be to overwhelming unless your use to that type of headspace.. if not then maybe give this a pass.

Take it easy :)
 
All my (3 or 4) badtrips have been the same. If not EXACTLY, then closely...


DiZzyBonne said:
Also, on your bad trips, do you feel like everybody is playing one big prank on you? Like the whole WORLD is in on some massive prank, like you stepped into another dimension? Also, one thing I've noticed is on bad trips, your visuals change INSTANTLY, and my problem is, they all connect, so I start seeing the EXACT same things as before.
Click to expand...

Agree! The prank thing i can relate to. When reading your post i feel like some revelation. I can't seem to describe in details though.

I do think i know waht you mean,.,.


//blazR
 
blazR said:
All my (3 or 4) badtrips have been the same. If not EXACTLY, then closely...




Agree! The prank thing i can relate to. When reading your post i feel like some revelation. I can't seem to describe in details though.

I do think i know waht you mean,.,.


//blazR
Click to expand...
It feels soothing, actually helps with my sanity knowing I'm not the only one having these same types of bad trips.
 
I think what causes bad trips more than anything else is just unresolved negative emotions. Anything that you've buried real deep tends to come to the surface when you trip. Lots of people/cultures use psychedelics to help make big decisions because of this quality.

I've had several bad trips, and I can understand what you mean by them being similar, but in my experience they are all unique. They share similar qualities the same way good trips do, for instance; getting stuck in a loop, feeling like everyone is laughing at you, seeing your friends and surroundings in a new (sometimes harsh) way, etc.

Most of the time a trip is harsh or bad because you are trying to keep it all bottled up. My bad trips got a lot easier to handle as time went on because I started to recognize them for what they were, that is, a symptom not a problem.

There have been intense and negative experiences where I "felt" future events and was overwhelmed with fear and paranoia, rather than accepting that these things could happen no matter what I did or how I felt about it. I've also had very apocalyptic hallucinations where I saw mangled bodies all around me covering every inch of the ground and was attacked by spiders (I don't THINK they were real). More often I would get paranoid, thinking that people were conspiring against me or laughing at me. So, yeah, all negative but very different trips.

Anyway, I think that there's a lot of utility in bad trips. They bring out your greatest fears, but give you the opportunity to face them. You might learn to appreciate them eventually. I'm fond of telling people: Once you have faced Hell, nothing scares you anymore. Don't fear the reaper, man.
 
For me bad trips have in the past been about control, about not being able to let go and let it happen without worrying about whether I had gone certifiably insane or it was just an amazing experience.
If a trip is dragging you away from rationality and control but into a world of intuitive flow and mysticism and you resist, if you are unwilling to accept then it will be like a struggle that you won't win. I think usually what is happening is your ego dissolves, but it has automated defense mechanisms (a life drive) that steers you away from ego death. The only way out is through, as long as you want to abort in a different way you will stay in a loop. There are of course methods for aborting or softening - which I do not recommend..

Since if you at some point just give up and let yourself go, it can be cathartic, enlightening or like a breakthrough. For this reason there is something to be learned or overcome with a bad trip which is why I prefer to talk about difficult experiences and not bad trips. If you manage to overcome it and have a realization that completely surrendering is actually the solution because there will be no more struggle... that is a big win, so not bad at all anymore.

Defense mechanisms are hardwired very deeply within us so you do need either to get this insight in some way, or find out by accident. The most intense thing that ever happened to me was when I had a tormenting mushroom trip that defied space, time and life as I knew it and it was so much that I saw no other option than to surrender even if it meant insanity or death. That was the most enlightening thing that ever happened to me.

There was another time on LSD when I was lying down meditating, and I could feel that I quickly had my ego dissolve up until a point of total dissociation or a mystical state of consciousness, but I chickened out at the last moment. It was exactly like I was establishing an uplink to a state of being beyond regular state of consciousness and I approached a moment where only a single element was left to complete the uplink. Then I started to worry: what if I would leave myself, then my body would be there unprotected by my aware mind? I felt I didn't know enough about the mechanisms to ensure that I would be taken care of if I decided to pass through. In the end it is about control, I could not surrender my control to the 'faith' (trust may be a better word) that things would take care of themselves. I had no reason to assume my body would start running around deliriously or something like that, but no hard proof it wouldn't either.
The process broke down and left me very vulnerable and confused. It seems to not be something to lightly throttle back from, I was far along preparing for this change in state, then it all collapsed. I had a very tough time for about half an hour and then found the solution: to just have that trust, if I would 'give' that trust I would also be the one to 'receive' it. Now that doesn't necessarily make a lot of sense but the core sentiment is to just have faith in order to let go. It will be okay. It helps to know there is a sitter to watch over you as a failsafe, just to feel more safe about letting go.
 
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