Severe HPPD symptoms

[purdey]

I am in a position where I am experiencing HPPD like symptoms without significant prior drug use, my symptoms started after I was placed on a low dose anti-depressant. While on the course of anti depressants I smoked marijuana on a single occasion and this seems to be where my problems started. I began suffering from panic attacks and strange vision. I was placed on Paxil, and things suddenly got a lot worse. I got an immediate headache in the back right hand side of my head, pupils dilated, felt awful etc. I started to notice my vision was changing, starting with the appearance of visual snow. Between then and now everything has been getting significantly worse. My symptoms are as follows:

Visual snow-the first symptom
After Images from just about everything I look at, driving at night is essentially impossible. If I look at anything , and then divert my eyes, the light follows causing a trail before disappearing a few seconds later. Positive afterimages also cause me significant distress in the day.
Visual trails
Ghosting images:This is especially apparent if I am looking through glass, I.E. If I am looking out of a window at a street lamp I see the light, and then a ghost copy of it above. If I look at myself in the car re view mirror, I see my face, then a ghosted version of it mirrored above.
The illusion that patterns (and other stationary objects or things i.e. text - are moving, making reading difficult.
A vast increase of floaters and shadows moving across my field of vision (I have never noticed a floater prior to this happening)
Halo's and star bursting lights (again making night driving difficult)
Closed eye visuals (If I close my eyes and put a little pressure on my eyelids, a vortex of colours and spirals start to appear, this can even happen with one eye closed)
Some colour confusion
Patterns appearing and moving on walls if I look for long enough
Flashes of colour and light
Large shimmering circle in the centre of my vision on a few occasions.
All symptoms have gradually appeared and worsened over a period of months.

Other symptoms include panic attacks and anxiety.
I have been to multiple Neurologists, had multiple CT and MRI scans etc and none of them have had the faintest idea what the problem could be. I began seeing a psychiatrist to see if there was any underlying mental health problem. He ruled anything out and prescribed me an SSRI because he thought I was a little low. This made the symptoms a 100 times worse. I then tried Diazepam which made no real difference. I read that Clonazepam was the best treatment for HPPD like symptoms so tried that and again, it made the symptoms worse (I have heard that Clonazepam, despite being a Benzo, has an effect on serotonin) It seem's anything that is linked to serotonin makes things worse, and even when I am not on any medication, things continue to get worse (the headache in the same place doesn't get better, and is present at some point just about everyday).
This is having a major psychological effect on me, before this started I was a happy and confident 19 year old, and now I feel i'm damaged and constantly worry about how much worse it's all going to get.

The only thing I can find with similar symptoms is HPPD (infact my symptoms are identical). Could this be HPPD from marijuana and SSRI'S. I'm positing here to try and get some feedback from people with experience of this condition. What shall I do?

 

[...]

I began researching the symptoms and thats how I stumbled upon HPPD and ultimately your name (I hear your one of the few experts in this area).

That is correct. The purges have decimated our numbers, and currently only seven of us remain (I am deliberately not counting Juan Gomez because his brain has become a radish).

 

[sekio]

Get your eyesight tested.

 

[MyExcuse]

I then tried Diazepam which made no real difference. I read that Clonazepam was the best treatment for HPPD like symptoms so tried that and again, it made the symptoms worse (I have heard that Clonazepam, despite being a Benzo, has an effect on serotonin) It seem's anything that is linked to serotonin makes things worse, and even when I am not on any medication, things continue to get worse (the headache in the same place doesn't get better, and is present at some point just about everyday).
This is having a major psychological effect on me, before this started I was a happy and confident 19 year old, and now I feel i'm damaged and constantly worry about how much worse it's all going to get.

The only thing I can find with similar symptoms is HPPD (infact my symptoms are identical). Could this be HPPD from marijuana and SSRI'S. I'm positing here to try and get some feedback from people with experience of this condition. What shall I do?

If clonazepam made things worse, I'm going to have to say a large portion of this problem is psychological. I've had HPPD symptoms so bad that I couldn't see at night (let alone drive), but they lessen in intensity after a period of abstinence from any drug use. Most individuals with HPPD will concur that the symptoms do lessen with time and that medication does alleviate many of the symptoms (if nothing else, the anxiety).

And perhaps this may be the beginning of serious mental dysfunction, you should get a second opinion from a new psychiatrist or better yet, see a psychologist who won't just dole you out medications. If this really is HPPD, you would be better off learning how to live with it rather than trying to defeat it. It's a permanent addition to your perception of the world, and you should embrace it.

In the name of harm reduction: Meditate.

 

[First Bad Comedown]

The Visual Cortex in your brain

HPPD is something I have become familiar with.

For me, overuse of MDMA led to severe symptoms, including a mild case of HPPD. For the first month, I experienced a type of visual distortion that is hard to describe. You know that each eye sends information to the brain, which is then fused into a single image, right? Well, for me it felt like the two images couldn't sync up correctly. I also have had severe anehdonia, which is a loss in pleasure due to a feeling of complete detachment from my physical body and the outside world. Nothing seemed real. Even tactile sensations seemed to fade. I felt like it would never stop.
Now, four months later, my visual distortions have improved significantly. My anehdonia is still present, especially when I taper off of my piracetam - a wonderful little supplement I recommend for you.

A close friend of mine did way too much acid one night. Apparently 9 hits is going a little overboard.
Now she sees tracers all the time. It has been a month, for her.
Some people see paint running down the walls for years after stopping the acid.

In my research, which has been extensive, the visual cortex in the occipital region of the brain seems to blame for this. In studies using primates and MDMA in toxic doses, the visual cortex was noted as one of the regions of the brain that was least capable of recovery. To be more specific, the region is innervated by serotonin receptors. After seven years of recovery time, these monkeys brains were cut into thin slices and analyzed. Many areas of the brain showed recovery of serotonergic axons, some did not. But the visual cortex was notable. In a very specific part of the visual cortex, there was absolutely NO reinnervation shown. Do not listen to those who discredit Ricaurte's study as fraud. His 'dopamine' theory was fraudulent, but NOT his major 'serotonin' study.

Now, don't freak out, because other parts of the cortex did show evidence of recovery, but the scientists were surprised to find this one area and decided to point it out.

Also, it appears that visual problems rank up there as one of the MOST common symptoms of LSD or MDMA abuse. Meth users have also been known to have very REAL visual hallucinations, sometimes quite complex in nature.

According to your post, you were not using any of these psychadelic drugs. But it is still important for you to understand that the visual cortex is among the more complicated structures in the brain. Scientists are baffled that it even works. We should ALL have massive distortions, visual snow, and even see the blood vessels in our eyeballs! But, somehow, we don't.

Now, back to your 'anti-depressants'. This was one BIG factor. Most anti-depressants are serotonergic. They prevent the re-uptake of serotonin in specific regions of the brain, causing an increase in serotonin concentration in the synapse - the space between neurons. In essence, the anti-depressants are supposed to be a safer, non-toxic version of drugs like MDMA...

But, they don't know how it will affect everyone.
In fact, a number of people have reported LONG term sexual dysfunction following use of these 'anti-depressants'. Some also report the anehdonia, feeling detached.

During my recovery process I have found that marijuana use makes all of my visual and emotional problems much WORSE. So the pot is factor number two.

Did you know that studies of schizophrenia show a STRONG relationship between cannabis and onset of schizophrenia?
Like, 500% strong!

In other words, those who are genetically predisposed to schizophrenia are MUCH more likely to develop the disease if they use cannabis!

So, you were using a serotonin agonist, under direction of a doctor, and smoked pot. Now you are experiencing LONG term HPPD.

That shit sucks. I feel for you. HPPD does a great job of inducing anxiety and depression, too.

Get OFF the SSRIs. Don't think about it, DO IT.
Fuck the doctors. Fuck the doctors!
Stop the SSRIs, and do it NOW.

Taper them off, slowly. If you have to cut your pills into smaller pieces with a knife....taper it off. You do NOT want to go cold turkey.

Expect your symptoms to get worse from this loss of serotonin.
Deal with it. You have to.
Stop smoking pot for a long time.
Deal with it. You have to.

Take ibuprofen everyday to help with the inflammation in the brain.
Also, take fish oil everyday. This improves the coating around nerve cells in the brain, speeding up the process of adaptation.

What else can speed up the process?

Exercise!
Even on my worst days, I found that FORCING myself to exercise made a HUGE difference. On days two and three....it gets even better. The benefits in regards to HPPD and anxiety respond more each day. After a week or more of lifting weights, I would be blessed with a two day vacation from my symptoms.
Apparently, cardio is an effective way to increase blood flow to the brain. In fact it is so effective, that the brain sprouts new capillaries in response! After months of cardio, doctors have found that 'total brain volume' shows a measurable increase.

So stop the damn SSRIs, all of them.
Get sleep. Go easy on benedryl, though...it affects serotonin.
Take fish oil and ibuprofen....and exercise!

Then, wait....
the healing brain doesn't count days like we do. It counts in months. Many drug abusers report recovery periods of 1-4 years.
I doubt yours will take so long, but if its getting WORSE with time....that is unusual. Most of us report slow improvement.

Stop the SSRIs. They are responsible for your worsening condition.
Brain scans are crude tools used by doctors that poorly understand the infinite complexity that is our brain! The doctors cannot help.

Let your brain help itself using the methods I have described.
And trust your brain. Believe that time will eventually heal you.
The anxiety you feel is actually your endocrine system pumping away at your brain tissue. Eventually, the connections will be made, but it is SLOW progress.

If you have more questions, feel free to PM me.
Good luck.

 

[gucciman]

Hey FBC,
i can't PM you(not a Bluelighter), but i wanted to say that your posts have been very helpful. I've been experiencing every manner of mdma-induced brain fuckery, including mild HPPD, mainly visual snow and a sort of tunnel vision/depth perception wackness.
you say your symptoms are hard to describe-to what degree would you say they've improved?
reading about HPPD is troubling, as a lot of the people who have it have been dealing with it for in some cases many years.

 

[DJHENRU]

What was the first antidepressant?
I know im gonna sound like a tinfoiled hat person but paxil has flourine molecules(im hypocratic over this possibly as I drink green tea everday) smoking shit is bad, & there is probably dietary and lifestyle changes that could reverse this.

 

[...]

What was the first antidepressant?
I know im gonna sound like a tinfoiled hat person but paxil has flourine molecules(im hypocratic over this possibly as I drink green tea everday) smoking shit is bad, & there is probably dietary and lifestyle changes that could reverse this.

1st antidepressants were MAOIs with unwieldy names.

The fluoride bonded to the phenyl ring will not detach in vivo.

Did you know that most chemists will never even see fluorine? See here.

 

[bben]

abilify is known to help with some issues of depersonalization and de-realization through its dopamine-serotonin stalizing properties. The ssris made me worse but this helped a GREAT deal.

 

[DJHENRU]

I was just guessing, noobishly.

 

[MyExcuse]

abilify is known to help with some issues of depersonalization and de-realization through its dopamine-serotonin stalizing properties. The ssris made me worse but this helped a GREAT deal.

When I was going through GBL withdrawals, abilify was the only drug that actually helped with the bouts of delusion. Didn't beat seroquel though.

 

[effie]

Take ibuprofen everyday to help with the inflammation in the brain.
Also, take fish oil everyday. This improves the coating around nerve cells in the brain, speeding up the process of adaptation.

What else can speed up the process?

You seem to have good knowledge of HPPD. I have the symptoms of HPPD (mostly visual snow, trails and ghost images) which are slowly worsening over months, but I don't wish to give them a diagnosis/name without definite proof of the cause, and I tend to just ignore them as they aren't that severe for me.

I take slight issue with your "stop SSRI" advice - need to read the research you refer to, and if it is worsening the visual disturbance then fair enough - sounds like the OP does not have moderate/severe depression and it won't cause them harm. However, this is an open forum and would hate someone's psychiatric state to be destabilised while trying to fix a visual disturbance. Always best to consult with your psychiatrist about such stuff IMO.

The bit I was most concerned about, however, was your advice to take ibuprofen every day. Ibuprofen has wide-reaching effects beyond reducing inflammation (and "inflammation in brain" sounds a little medically dubious anyway, you'd be pretty sick if you had that) due to their unselected COX inhibition.

They can cause occult gastric bleeding leading to severe anaemia (COX inhibition reduces protective prostaglandins in the stomach, so it is damaged by it's own hydrochloric acid) and renal failure in combination with other renal insults such as dehydration or use of other nephrotoxic drugs (COX inhibition leading to reduced prostaglandins leading to reduced renal blood flow - not enough to do harm by itself, but renal failure is often due to cumulative insults.)

It is not something I would want anyone taking every day for long periods without consulting a doctor, taking something gastro-protective and being aware of potential kidney problems...

Not meaning to attack your post at all, just picky about medical stuff

 

[First Bad Comedown]

Gucciman,

My HPPD has steadily improved over the last 4 months. There were times that it temporarily got worse, but overall it seemed to improve.

Now, almost 5 months into my recovery, I can say that my visual problems are nearly gone entirely. I expect it will be unnoticeable within the next 2 months.

I have also come to believe that the visual problems are some of the last things to be fixed. It is as if the rest of the brain is prioritized over the visual cortex. I would even say that the healing process that is occurring, actually causes the visual distortions to become more pronounced...

Only after the rest of the brain has made progress will the visual problems start to straighten out. Others have said that the HPPD is simply caused by the extreme anxiety. I think they are related, but not so simply described.

MOST cases of HPPD do not last years. A few rare cases exist within the MDMA research....involving very heavy users. They describe visual problems, especially involving dark rooms or shadows....many years later.
Some LSD users become color-blind permanently.

But the MAJORITY of people see their symptoms resolve. How long has it been for you? If your answer is less than a year, then be patient. More patient than you might think possible. Most likely, your vision will correct itself within a year or two.


Effie,
no offense taken.

Personally I do NOT believe in SSRI use for anyone. Period.
Many doctors will agree with me, and certainly you can find MANY bluelighters that will say to avoid SSRIs at all costs.

The belief that somehow doctors are qualified to prescribe such a medication is mind-boggling. The science is in its infancy. There are MANY negative side effects to these medications, sometimes quite severe and long-lasting.

I would be more understanding of SSRIs if they were used only in acute depression/suicidal cases. But they are NOT effective for weeks or months of use, so they do not apply to these people.

I do normally warn that tapering off is CRITICAL, because many people experience profound negative withdrawal effects. Your concern about others mental health is VALID. I would then argue that many of these people should not be on an SSRI if withdrawal is so dangerous. Are they really fixing anything?

Keep in mind that some people DO belong on antidepressants. But I believe the medicines are WAY overprescribed. The MAJORITY of depressed people taking them have failed to try other methods first....such as diet and exercise!

Also, you are right to caution about long-term ibuprofen use. It does indeed put the stomach and intestines at increased risk of bleeding, especially older people. I know a few folks in their 50s that took ibuprofen all the time and now their stomachs are torn up.

However, I DO recommend taking 1-2 doses of ibuprofen per day during recovery. Many former MDMA users describe 'mind-bending head pressure' or even 'brain zaps'. I will go further than this. I can feel increased blood flow to very specific regions of my brain.

This is verified by research. Increased regional bloodflow is a hallmark sign of MDMA toxicity.

There is also emerging evidence that inflammation, on a cellular level...may be a leading cause of MANY types of age-related disease, including cognitive decline. Some scientists are even suggesting that a single ibuprofen taken every day may protect against Alzheimer's. No proof of this yet, but 'inflammation' is being implicated by MANY diseases as the common denominator.

The first few nights of my recovery were quite violent, and I believe they included swelling around the brain. Although I do not think systemic swelling is happening anymore, I DO believe swelling from increased blood flow is causing localized inflammation on the cellular level. If my judgment is correct, then ibuprofen may be protective in this process. I will likely discontinue regular use of it once my recovery appears to be over.

I am curious as to what the cause of your HPPD is?
And how long into recovery are you?
I am sorry to hear it is getting worse, but I am glad that you can ignore it.

For me the visual problems were secondary to much worse symptoms of anxiety and DPDR. Once those started to fade, my vision started getting better.

Any input is welcomed.

 

[gucciman]

@FBC
thanks for the response!
it's been nowhere near a year yet, only a little while since I first noticed my symptoms(mainly visual snow, starbursting, sensitivity to light).
I was still in recovery from a period of mdma abuse when i felt like i had improved enough to do mushrooms, and then a small amount of mdma a few days later(bad idea, I know, it seems to have set me back a bunch), and a little while after that the visual stuff started appearing.
It initially really distressed me, but isn't really too debilitating, only a little distracting at times, if I let it get to me. Browsing an HPPD forum didn't do me any favours either(seriously, biggest bunch of downers i've ever seen!).
So it's been about 3 weeks since I did mushrooms, 2 1/2 since I did MDMA, and about a week since I last smoked pot.
I've been taking most of your advice(exercise daily, diet, fish oil), as it's what helped me out a lot post-mdma abuse, but unfortunately I can't get ahold of piracetam(I don't have a credit card and as far as I know it's not sold in any stores in Canada).

 

[hamhurricane]

Levetiracetam or Keppra is one of very few drugs that have been clinically demonstrated to alleviate symptoms of HPPD, definitely something to look into.

 

[First Bad Comedown]

Gucciman,

I'm glad my postings have been a help to you.
I can remember the first month of my anxiety....I was obsessed with finding information, including reports from others that had 'been there'.
While I found comfort in the reassurance that 'you will be ok'....I was pissed that I couldn't find any truly detailed accounts of the recovery process.

That is what I have set out to do. To provide what others have not.

Let me pass the torch buddy - you will be OK.
Believe me, I have put in a lot of time on this....and the evidence is overwhelmingly in your favor.

Am I saying there is no permanent damage?
No.

But damage from MDMA appears to be unique when compared to other types of brain damage. For example, many types of brain damage, from traumatic brain injury to stroke to viral infections to other serotonergic neurotoxins - these can induce a process known as 'gliosis'. This is a type of scar tissue in the brain. It is also easy to test for, similar to the way scientists test for antibodies. Well, they cannot find gliosis happening even after acute MDMA administration. This means that the possibility of healing is left open - a lot of these axons can resprout!

Here is another sign of hope. Serotonin is critical for cerebral bloodflow - it has direct effects on vasoconstriction of blood vessels. It has been demonstrated that MDMA exposure causes a decrease in bloodflow to many different regions of the brain. Sometimes this lasts for a long time. In some users, the decrease is profound. However, it has also been shown that these users can experience a period of INCREASED bloodflow to these areas following a period of decrease! Sometimes this increase lasts for many months. This is understood to be a sign of neurotoxicity AND possible recovery.

They have found that eventually the bloodflow returns to normal levels. This is a 'holy shit' moment for you. Keep in mind that scientists have very few ways of actually scanning a brain in a living person. One of the standard tests they give to MANY different patients is to look at the distribution of bloodflow in the brain. A healthy brain should have even symmetrical bloodflow to the entire brain. If there are regions that are above or below the average for that person, doctors agree that something has gone wrong....but they struggle to diagnose what that is. What they feel comfortable saying is that bloodflow should be even in all healthy patients. They have seen enough brains of healthy individuals to say conclusively that even distribution of bloodflow is to be expected in a healthy brain.

This suggests one of two things....either the serotonin axons are resprouting in these areas....or other neurotransmitter systems are engaged in compensatory responses. Its probably both, but one way or another the brain manages to restore bloodflow.

I have read many other studies that offer greater detail....including scans looking for SERT or serotonin transporter binding...which almost always return to normal after about a year to a year in a half. The length of time coorelates with the amount of the drug taken. Also, self-reported depression coorelates with this timeline as well.

So no scar tissue forms....blood flow returns to normal....SERT binding returns to normal...and users describe depression as being gone.

Wow. That shit should give you some hope.

Want the bad news?
There is still likely some permanent damage in place, but it may simply be undetectable. It may fall below a threshold, beneath which it is difficult to find obvious changes in function or behavior.

However, this may place ex-users at increased risk down the line. We may lack the resilience we once had, and find that additional insult to the brain cannot be overcome....especially as we age.

There is also evidence that long standing alterations are occuring in the frontal and prefrontal cortices...and even the visual cortex. They still struggle to demonstrate that there are profound consequences to this....remember the brain is engaging in compensation for this damage.
But they are confient that when they start cutting open brains of deceased former users, they will find undeniable evidence of permanent alterations in serotonin axon innervation.

One of the strong pieces of evidence for this is the studies that demonstrate that former users, even after 2 and a half years of abstinence....STILL show a reduced response to MDMA or other serotonin agents. They have the cortisol response expected, but they no longer achieve the impressive prolactin response. This is a strong argument for structural alterations in these regions of the brain. This goes along with the many complaints here on BL about 'losing the magic' permanently.

Maybe we just don't need this cortisol/prolactin response to remain intact for the brain to compensate just enough for normal function.
Maybe it takes more time than we have studied!

Most that complain about the 'loss of magic' being permanent....have only waited months....maybe a year or two. Hardly permanent! Try to keep in mind that many of these users are young and lack the patience that comes with age. To them, a year feels like its a permanent change.
I have read one report of a user that thought the loss was permanent until they waited seven years. They were pleased to announce that the magic returned.

Can mushrooms cause problems too?
Absolutely.
Not only have I read reports about too many mushrooms leading to a very similar period of anxiety, but I have a close friend that went through a year of major intestinal problems as a result of his mushroom use. When it began he actually thought he was going to die! He started writing goodbye letters to his friends and family...he even had surgery to remove a section on intestine!

Now, five years later he says he has little anxiety. The little stuff just doesn't bother him anymore....sometimes he is TOO laid back, if you ask me. Every now and then his intestines act up if he eats way too much....but he was told he had a narrow section of bowel....which may be a form of physical damage caused by intestinal failure. But the important thing here, is he DID recover. He no longer struggles like he used to.

Very few ex users will actually continue to post online years after they quit. It is difficult to ascertain who has truly long term consequences and who doesn't.
There are a few I have seen that claim their recovery was limited and they are living a permanently altered state. Upon investigation, these people tend to be HEAVY regular users of psychedilics prior to quiting! One in particular mixed mushrooms and MDMA. Then LSD and MDMA. This was after using MDMA for a long time! Then he scares other users about his 'permanent' state. What do you expect when you eat every combo you can for a few years??

Recognize that there are consequences to everything you do. Also, recognize that NOTHING is permanent....not even you.
If you step WAY over the line with your use, it makes sense that you are fucked up, possibly for the rest of your life.

But the vast majority of moderate users tend to recover just fine!

Note - I have come accross an exception....piperazines do NOT mix with MDMA! Some have reported MAJOR problems after ONE incident. They will likely recover as well, but the extent of their problems is heart-breaking considering they were very LIGHT users or first-timers! Unfortunately, piperazine are sometimes sold as MDMA. That is why you must know your source and test your pills!

The piracetam is worth asking someone to help you with. Don't you have someone you can give twenty bucks to?

Keep up the excersice and supplements. They are not a fast fix....but they will speed up the process. And don't start worrying about 'long term' or 'permanent' effects until you have passed the one year mark. Even then, two to four years is REALLY when you should start to give up hope.
I doubt that it will take you longer than six months to come back and declare that you are 75% recovered!

Stay away from ALL psychedelics. That means MDMA, mushrooms, LSD, piperazines...NOT worth another set back. Even if you feel recovered in a few months....you need to wait at LEAST a year, no matter what.

I strongly suggest staying away from the weed too. If you are having anxiety still, it will only make things worse.

You are going to learn the true meaning of patience, my friend.
It sucks, but you WILL make it.

Good luck.

 

[PeedOff]

Hppd is temporary. I have gotten it a few times.. just avoid mind altering drugs it will eventually subside. Also each time doesnt get more severe its fluxuated in severity and varies on what visuals persist. Of course, this is all in my experience.

 

[hyperkbit]

Hppd is temporary. I have gotten it a few times.. just avoid mind altering drugs it will eventually subside. Also each time doesnt get more severe its fluxuated in severity and varies on what visuals persist. Of course, this is all in my experience.

Not sure about that! Got heavy HPPD about 12 years ago (disliked it back then - now i wouldn't call it HPPD anymore coz it is an anhancement, but for the simpleness of the text i stay with HPPD).
Included snow (not permanently), straight lines doesn't seem straight, traffic sign kept changing size and mostly seemed to be lighted, heavy muster on bigger-one-coloered areas (like the sky) build of moving particles, etc.. Some stuff made me nearly crazy at the beginning! Especially the moving particles in the sky - also went to the doc, but he couldn't (or didn't want) to help me. Nowadays i like it - after i realized that this is not druginduced madness but awareness of reality that got more powerful by using drugs (especially lsd).

My point is that i still got it beside several years where i took absolutly no drugs! Although i have to admit if i do drugs it gets stronger for some time and slowly back - maybe with some new effects.

Very important is to accept that you got the best perception you ever could have - and be happy about this
One more tip compare the importance of all this to existence and the universe :D

 

[lookid]

***

 

[hdtv]

its the ssris fuckin with you.
cut that shit out!