NeighborhoodThreat
Bluelight Crew
^This, congratulations H O O D !
-
OD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic
Harm Reduction Progress Mega Thread
- Thread starter Cane2theLeft
- Start date
- Status
^This, congratulations H O O D !
HdoubleODeezy
Bluelighter
thanks guys!
Been&Done
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2010
- Messages
- 235
Ok, so.....Friday night i had a few vodkas at home and took the dog and my gf's car who was away for the weekend and went down for a spin, got lost and stopped next to a guy to ask for direction to go back home, he clearly was a crackhead and was talking 243 words/minute or maybe 241, so left him and made a right turn, 5 second later a police car is suddenly behind me, weewa weewa, hmmm. The officer came by claiming i made a wrong turn when i asked if there anything wrong "officer" and then almost automatically he asked what was i telling that crackhead, i said i'm lost and need to go back home, the mofo smelt vodka and the fuckin pigs cuffed me (they were 2) and i'm arrested ! Now my dog and my gf's car, registered under her mom's name were being taken away and my girl was in fuckin' N.Y for the weekend!! Hmmm...breath analyzer and shit and had a zip-lock with residue of weed, really ridiculously little amount that wouldn't even make a decent hit from those tiny pipes they sell as key chains! In the morning i'm sent to fuckin jail, because there was no one to come bail me!!! and since its the weekend so the court was gonna be on Monday, i was in a weird daze, not even thinking yet about my Sub doses, which were about 1mg/day, THANK GOD about that!!
Saturday morning, instead of going home, im taken to jail, given an orange overall, told to strip naked and wear it, given 2 orange T-shirts and 2 pairs of boxers and 2 socks and a lame blue shoe. All my phone numbers are on my mobile that has been confiscated of course already with the rest of the stuff and the clothes you came in with, so cant call a lawyer and my freakin gf is in NY!!! freakin bad luck. SHIT!!NO BAIL, NO ANYONE, FUCK IM IN A REAL JAIL FOR THE 1ST TIME IN MY LIFE!!! After all the coucou stuff i'v done growing up, im in jail for DUI, especially that it's After relocating for a fresh start and getting away from my 10 yrs relationSHIT with heroin, well i gotta be honest here it was a beautiful relationSHIP for 2/3 years, not more for sure
when we were doing it every friday for example but that honeymoon doesn't last long as we all know here and even the not here....Anyways, the nurse is a 65 yr old Eastern European who while entering the jail gave us little sticks to pee on, me and my "inmates" . Five different little plastic squares and when u pee each turns into a specific color...Until today, didn't know if that would find the xanax i had (from earlier) and the weed and the booze, or was it for diseases, All i remember is that my 3rd square was purple, unlike everyone else. I'm such a newbie in all this and actually don't ever want to know anything more about prisons, really "Au revoir et merci" as the Frenchkissers say.
A few times i heard "CODE BLUE, CODE BLUE" on the speakers that are everywhere by the way, meaning a fight is breaking and you see the guards running towards a specific area...And the fights are FREAKIN' FIGHTS! I heard from my cell mate about a guy getting hit by 3 huge black guys for example after having his eyes covered with toilet paper so they can't see anything and dragged from the neck to the showers where the guards cant hear shit and the camera is too far. Another getting his face open with a piece of glass a few steps from his cell door (my Yugoslavian cellmate) So actually you can get killed and the guards might not find out until the morning when the doors are automatically open. Thank God i didn't witness a murder or something, apparently they banned the weight training because inmates were killing others while bench pressing!
I'm sitting now in my room after 6 days being in jail with people who still have to wait for 41 MORE FUCKIN MONTHS!!! And 6 days went like a lifetime to me.
My 1st few hours there when i was "checking in", I 1st spoke to the nurse about Subutex and she never heard of it before, i dont know why since its her only fucking job, educate yourself "Nurse." And Bupes have been there (Canada and the whole world) for quite a few years now!! I even wrote it down for her from behind the bars, "Buprenorphine and here in Canada u got Suboxone that i hate and gets me headaches" i slowly said; felt like a school teacher trying to explain quantum physics to a 6 year old and i know she has no clue but doing my best. Didn't want to be in jail for God knows how many days AND to be withdrawing too...hmm...not a very romantic image huh! The Sweating and the Diarrhea in JAIL! Plus, it would have been my 1st time to really spend a few days without Subutex since i started it seriously 6 months ago, and all i heard about its WD's is through here and was actually expecting a lot worse.
Anyways to cut the story a lil shorter, the nurse passes by at 7 pm and what did they have for me in those lil plastic cups, Librium and Tylenol, i looked at the guy nurse and said i take a very strong opioid called Subutex and what will Tylenol do to me?! "Oh please, is that Tylenol with codeine at least? No that's just Tylenol!!" Really u fuckers, smiled at me like a "you're in jail and these things are written in bloody forms and according to the doc and the doses and blablabla!! Yes and he looked and said ok i'll double dose you, and through the metal bars, he gave me another one Tylenol like he's doing me a favor, and disappeared into the night, oh and yes you had to swallow the pills they give you in front of them, yeah, that's another important rule there, and i think we all know why!
I heard that there are drugs there too, and methadone is only given to inmates who are already on it, of course i didn't know that piece of info until it's too late when the doc saw me on my 2nd day and said that he knew what suboxone was, i was impressed and proud of him! But said we don't have it, so my happiness was just gone in seconds. My next dose was changed to be 2 Librium (mood stabilizer) as the funny old doc explained to me and clonadine (my 1st time to take Clonadine, i even got confused and asked is it Clonazepam, and he said no. Anyways, i surprisingly did very well without Subutex and didn't even take a shit until after 3.5 days when i went to court and at some point in a room by myself, asked for some toilet paper and got out of my peter the biggest doodoo i think i have ever proudly produced. I usually go every morning, so all these days without doing my number 2, i don't think my stomach will forgive me easily for those few days... The food was a constant reminder i was in jail, man, had to eat and the guys save stuff for the night hunger and trade them as i'm still not really thinking about those munchies or shipsee's (sp?)
And surprisingly, i was relatively ok, and used to sleep okish and take those 2 doses a day, this was the only human thing that was in the whole lock up thing, and i could see the methadone guys running to the door when the nurse arrives at 7 pm, while in the morning they pass by when ur inside ur cell and make u take it and swallow it in front of them, a nurse and a security guard....and by the way, what a miserable job that is huh!!! A security guard in a jail, like fuck your life, really!! Some got attitude, others, but very few got a sense a humor that i used to enjoy and even thank them for it and share a smile. I think it was a defense mechanism that i unconsciously used while trying to find any positivity in the whole fuckin' ordeal, even if it's 3 second smile.
And females guards too yep! Canada the Great, i was handcuffed and uncuffed by a ratio of 2:1 Men : women, so they were all around in prison and in court which i had to visit twice since no1 came to bail me out that 1st day and we went in dark boxes, cuffed to 6 more people in a metal compartment inside the car, to and from jail and the court, i did it twice.
When i finally got to the court and saw the judge and that bizarre lawyer of theirs that whispered to me:"ok, so you have someone to pay your bail? Said yes, but my phone is in jail and they wont let me get the numbers from it since the only numbers i know by heart in the whole damn country is my gf's (since i just moved) and she was coming back from NY after the weekend, plus there are no mobile phone calling or 3 ways from jail, so what to do!! Really!?!?
Fuck i got it out all on you guys, i don't know to say sorry for being so long, but this is my story and i'm sticking to it
Spent the whole morning with lawyers on the phone trying to get a lawyers specialized in Driving under the influence, I spoke with 1 for 1.5 hrs told him all details possible, even my dose of Subutex and when did i take it that day and my plan for tapering, really, confessed almost everything, and what did u eat for dinner that night, and how long have u been driving before u got busted, and...anyways you got the message.....i'll go smoke my 2nd joint in 6 days, the 1st is what made me write all this, but i'll tell u the rest of the story tomorrow, if i still have the energy i hope.
Once again, writing is therapeutic for me, and wanted to share with you specially the meds system in the Canadian jails, maybe my little story here make someone's stay more enjoyable if he/she wasn't such a 1st timer like myself . Off for cooking a steak and hope all is progressing well and kids, please stay away from jails
PEACE.....I think that's my biggest post since i joined BL, gotta read it 1st before posting, i'm sure that this 1st j has some effects on my writing and of course my 1st dose of Subutex too. Did i mention that this is the 1st time i don't smoke up for 6 days in a row since 1997! Hmm, maybe i did deserve those few days after all, hmm.....Good Night all
Saturday morning, instead of going home, im taken to jail, given an orange overall, told to strip naked and wear it, given 2 orange T-shirts and 2 pairs of boxers and 2 socks and a lame blue shoe. All my phone numbers are on my mobile that has been confiscated of course already with the rest of the stuff and the clothes you came in with, so cant call a lawyer and my freakin gf is in NY!!! freakin bad luck. SHIT!!NO BAIL, NO ANYONE, FUCK IM IN A REAL JAIL FOR THE 1ST TIME IN MY LIFE!!! After all the coucou stuff i'v done growing up, im in jail for DUI, especially that it's After relocating for a fresh start and getting away from my 10 yrs relationSHIT with heroin, well i gotta be honest here it was a beautiful relationSHIP for 2/3 years, not more for sure
when we were doing it every friday for example but that honeymoon doesn't last long as we all know here and even the not here....Anyways, the nurse is a 65 yr old Eastern European who while entering the jail gave us little sticks to pee on, me and my "inmates" . Five different little plastic squares and when u pee each turns into a specific color...Until today, didn't know if that would find the xanax i had (from earlier) and the weed and the booze, or was it for diseases, All i remember is that my 3rd square was purple, unlike everyone else. I'm such a newbie in all this and actually don't ever want to know anything more about prisons, really "Au revoir et merci" as the Frenchkissers say. A few times i heard "CODE BLUE, CODE BLUE" on the speakers that are everywhere by the way, meaning a fight is breaking and you see the guards running towards a specific area...And the fights are FREAKIN' FIGHTS! I heard from my cell mate about a guy getting hit by 3 huge black guys for example after having his eyes covered with toilet paper so they can't see anything and dragged from the neck to the showers where the guards cant hear shit and the camera is too far. Another getting his face open with a piece of glass a few steps from his cell door (my Yugoslavian cellmate) So actually you can get killed and the guards might not find out until the morning when the doors are automatically open. Thank God i didn't witness a murder or something, apparently they banned the weight training because inmates were killing others while bench pressing!
I'm sitting now in my room after 6 days being in jail with people who still have to wait for 41 MORE FUCKIN MONTHS!!! And 6 days went like a lifetime to me.
My 1st few hours there when i was "checking in", I 1st spoke to the nurse about Subutex and she never heard of it before, i dont know why since its her only fucking job, educate yourself "Nurse." And Bupes have been there (Canada and the whole world) for quite a few years now!! I even wrote it down for her from behind the bars, "Buprenorphine and here in Canada u got Suboxone that i hate and gets me headaches" i slowly said; felt like a school teacher trying to explain quantum physics to a 6 year old and i know she has no clue but doing my best. Didn't want to be in jail for God knows how many days AND to be withdrawing too...hmm...not a very romantic image huh! The Sweating and the Diarrhea in JAIL! Plus, it would have been my 1st time to really spend a few days without Subutex since i started it seriously 6 months ago, and all i heard about its WD's is through here and was actually expecting a lot worse.
Anyways to cut the story a lil shorter, the nurse passes by at 7 pm and what did they have for me in those lil plastic cups, Librium and Tylenol, i looked at the guy nurse and said i take a very strong opioid called Subutex and what will Tylenol do to me?! "Oh please, is that Tylenol with codeine at least? No that's just Tylenol!!" Really u fuckers, smiled at me like a "you're in jail and these things are written in bloody forms and according to the doc and the doses and blablabla!! Yes and he looked and said ok i'll double dose you, and through the metal bars, he gave me another one Tylenol like he's doing me a favor, and disappeared into the night, oh and yes you had to swallow the pills they give you in front of them, yeah, that's another important rule there, and i think we all know why!
I heard that there are drugs there too, and methadone is only given to inmates who are already on it, of course i didn't know that piece of info until it's too late when the doc saw me on my 2nd day and said that he knew what suboxone was, i was impressed and proud of him! But said we don't have it, so my happiness was just gone in seconds. My next dose was changed to be 2 Librium (mood stabilizer) as the funny old doc explained to me and clonadine (my 1st time to take Clonadine, i even got confused and asked is it Clonazepam, and he said no. Anyways, i surprisingly did very well without Subutex and didn't even take a shit until after 3.5 days when i went to court and at some point in a room by myself, asked for some toilet paper and got out of my peter the biggest doodoo i think i have ever proudly produced. I usually go every morning, so all these days without doing my number 2, i don't think my stomach will forgive me easily for those few days... The food was a constant reminder i was in jail, man, had to eat and the guys save stuff for the night hunger and trade them as i'm still not really thinking about those munchies or shipsee's (sp?)
And surprisingly, i was relatively ok, and used to sleep okish and take those 2 doses a day, this was the only human thing that was in the whole lock up thing, and i could see the methadone guys running to the door when the nurse arrives at 7 pm, while in the morning they pass by when ur inside ur cell and make u take it and swallow it in front of them, a nurse and a security guard....and by the way, what a miserable job that is huh!!! A security guard in a jail, like fuck your life, really!! Some got attitude, others, but very few got a sense a humor that i used to enjoy and even thank them for it and share a smile. I think it was a defense mechanism that i unconsciously used while trying to find any positivity in the whole fuckin' ordeal, even if it's 3 second smile.
And females guards too yep! Canada the Great, i was handcuffed and uncuffed by a ratio of 2:1 Men : women, so they were all around in prison and in court which i had to visit twice since no1 came to bail me out that 1st day and we went in dark boxes, cuffed to 6 more people in a metal compartment inside the car, to and from jail and the court, i did it twice.
When i finally got to the court and saw the judge and that bizarre lawyer of theirs that whispered to me:"ok, so you have someone to pay your bail? Said yes, but my phone is in jail and they wont let me get the numbers from it since the only numbers i know by heart in the whole damn country is my gf's (since i just moved) and she was coming back from NY after the weekend, plus there are no mobile phone calling or 3 ways from jail, so what to do!! Really!?!?
Fuck i got it out all on you guys, i don't know to say sorry for being so long, but this is my story and i'm sticking to it
Spent the whole morning with lawyers on the phone trying to get a lawyers specialized in Driving under the influence, I spoke with 1 for 1.5 hrs told him all details possible, even my dose of Subutex and when did i take it that day and my plan for tapering, really, confessed almost everything, and what did u eat for dinner that night, and how long have u been driving before u got busted, and...anyways you got the message.....i'll go smoke my 2nd joint in 6 days, the 1st is what made me write all this, but i'll tell u the rest of the story tomorrow, if i still have the energy i hope.
Once again, writing is therapeutic for me, and wanted to share with you specially the meds system in the Canadian jails, maybe my little story here make someone's stay more enjoyable if he/she wasn't such a 1st timer like myself . Off for cooking a steak and hope all is progressing well and kids, please stay away from jails
PEACE.....I think that's my biggest post since i joined BL, gotta read it 1st before posting, i'm sure that this 1st j has some effects on my writing and of course my 1st dose of Subutex too. Did i mention that this is the 1st time i don't smoke up for 6 days in a row since 1997! Hmm, maybe i did deserve those few days after all, hmm.....Good Night all
Last edited:
smokozziben
Greenlighter
Hey y'all. Been struggling to keep up with this monkey 'o mine 
Starting addiction day treatment next week. It's not quite rehab because I come home everyday at 3. But it's semi-intensive group and individual counseling. I need it. I'll see a psych md there too, for subs at least. I'll probably ask him for something to sleep because subs keep me up all night. What do you guys think, clonidine? I've never had it. Or a z-drug or antihistamine. I'd like to to in with an idea of the pros and cons of each. Maybe something for add, I am so so scattered. Don't necessarily want a stimulant though. And depression/anxiety? *sigh* idk
Amytriptaline? That may solve the sleep issue too.
It probably sounds like I am replacing dope with a bunch of other shit, which is true. At least it will be under dr.'s supervision though. I tried the non medical cold turkey rehab and it was a miserable failure. So yeah, life can be a bitch if ya make it one :/
Starting addiction day treatment next week. It's not quite rehab because I come home everyday at 3. But it's semi-intensive group and individual counseling. I need it. I'll see a psych md there too, for subs at least. I'll probably ask him for something to sleep because subs keep me up all night. What do you guys think, clonidine? I've never had it. Or a z-drug or antihistamine. I'd like to to in with an idea of the pros and cons of each. Maybe something for add, I am so so scattered. Don't necessarily want a stimulant though. And depression/anxiety? *sigh* idk
Amytriptaline? That may solve the sleep issue too.
It probably sounds like I am replacing dope with a bunch of other shit, which is true. At least it will be under dr.'s supervision though. I tried the non medical cold turkey rehab and it was a miserable failure. So yeah, life can be a bitch if ya make it one :/
Been&Done
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2010
- Messages
- 235
Well, even if that's true, you're staying away from dope, and all the hassles and the scoring and the fixes and the cash, and more cash and blabla. Even if that's you're 1st step, just take it already, and you'll be just fine Things keep getting better ultimately you know, so if there's a will, there's a way. Good luck with your monkey, kick him in the balls, it really hurts!
Been&Done
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2010
- Messages
- 235
Wondering if people stopped "progressing"! I still am, a little bit closer everyday, cant believe i'm down to 0.5, and that last 8mg, pill will take me 16 days if not more. Doses are ridiculously small, and i'm finally thinking of Capt H's method, dilute it with water like injection-style to be able to control these tiny amounts. Did the Clonadine i was given really help me those 6 days in the lock up and/or Librium?! I honestly never thought i'll take Librium, hehe. Anyways, got to see a doc here soon if i want the transition from Subs to nothing to be painless and successful. I wonder if the doc will offer it by himself.
Wake up people who are progressing and let it all out, it's a great relief. Good luck
Wake up people who are progressing and let it all out, it's a great relief. Good luck
Cane2theLeft
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Jun 21, 2008
- Messages
- 12,673
^congrats, you're doing great, man!
And yeah - where the fuck is everyone? Pull the needle out for a minute and let us know how you're doing!
And yeah - where the fuck is everyone? Pull the needle out for a minute and let us know how you're doing!
BrokedownPalace
Bluelight Crew
^Day 10 I believe off of methadone, still having moderate withdrawal symptoms despite taking bupe. Might as well not even take the fucking bupe, since no matter the dose/ROA it seems futile at best at reducing my withdrawal symptoms. Even when I take it, I STILL have really bad hot/cold flashes, chills, RLS like a bastard, insomnia, anxiety.. I ran out of benzos/soma which were helping greatly, and only have about 10mg of bupe left. I'm broke until the 1st, and can't refill my meds for about 2 weeks.
Just tryin' to ride it out.. No fun.
Just tryin' to ride it out.. No fun.
caseface99
Bluelight Crew
CANE! Your officially a senior citizen(mod) now?!
I'm doing great, Slowly jogging more often and for longer at a time, went like 20mins last night without stopping which is a feat for me. Im slowly but noticeably improving, im mostly just sensitive to temperatures now so if it's warm im hot and if it's cool im cold.
Gotta go get ready for work, 9 hours of serving sandwiches, greasy foods and primo taglio deli meats and cheeses. FML.
And it's stormy as FUCK out right now, jesus. severe rain and wind.
^^ Just stick with it Palace, if the bupe isn't helping then why bother? may as well go opiate free if your suffering that much anyway. It's worth it in the end though, good luck.
I'm doing great, Slowly jogging more often and for longer at a time, went like 20mins last night without stopping which is a feat for me. Im slowly but noticeably improving, im mostly just sensitive to temperatures now so if it's warm im hot and if it's cool im cold.
Gotta go get ready for work, 9 hours of serving sandwiches, greasy foods and primo taglio deli meats and cheeses. FML.
And it's stormy as FUCK out right now, jesus. severe rain and wind.
^^ Just stick with it Palace, if the bupe isn't helping then why bother? may as well go opiate free if your suffering that much anyway. It's worth it in the end though, good luck.
SubDude
Bluelighter
I Was wondering if there are some people here in their 30's or older who do enjoy recreational LSD every now and then? I love the shit
i used LSD a several times in my 20's. The 1st time or two was like some kind of "enlightenment" Seeing things clearly as never before... feeling really good. Then it hit me like a truck. Paranoia, God complex, feeling of imminent death, and horrible stomach pain. I tried a few more times hoping I had got some bad shit but from then on it was bad. Really scared to the point I was afraid to take it.
Don't know why that chemical effects so many people in different ways. I ended up liking opiates even better.
SubDude
Bluelighter
Geez... if you could just get some clonidine like BeenDone I'm sure it would help. Didn't you also have Neurontin? Check with some friends... maybe they can help... or there are larger cities that still have "free clinics" in some parts of town. I remember using one yrs ago and they just said pay them whatever I could afford when I go back on my feet. Check out the United Way... sometimes they will help with things like this... especially since you're quitting. They also helped me once when I was busted and needed help. They gave me a check [not a ticket] for bus fare home.... which was like 900 miles away. If it gets too bad... beg, borrow, or pawn something to get what you need. 10 days is a damn great start... keep it going... whatever way you can. Good luck!!
Been&Done
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2010
- Messages
- 235
Waow, love how my shout did get some effect.
@Cane: Thank you of course, i'm sure they wouldn't have written if it wasn't for your post and a big, fat congrats...you deserve all the best.
@Brokeddownpalace: Don't know why Bupes are ineffective with you, probably as they say about different reactions to different bodies but my knowledge about Methadone is quite limited but i do know that the WD's are longer than H for example (duh?! As i said i'm very general here) You said 10 days, right? That's a big step man, keep it up and you're doing great. May i ask what doses are you on, Bupe wise?
@Case: Been a while man, great to hear you're doing well, maybe Clonadine will be enough for my final taper, meaning without Kratom as you did. Those 5 nights were really ok, waiting a call back from a new doc here, a woman as i prefer dealing with women in general, they seem to listen to me and get convinced. Nothing to convince here, will just say i did my taper by myself and only have a few doses left and can't get more atm, oh and that Suboxone gets me headaches, since no Subutex for me in Canada (I heard from someone on here that their Suboxone is white and not orange) Anyways, i would rather have some Clonadine or anything else, really, than going back to those orange fuckers i hated, oh we said they're not orange here, well, will see and will update you people.
@Subdude: Also long time no posting, hope all is well at your end. LSD in particular is totally unique in effects on different people. For example your mind has learned "not to like it" after those few unpleasant times. In my case, Even with falling into opiates addiction for years, it always represented hope and happiness for me and the last 2 times i'v done it, i was already out of addiction and the 1st 30 trips were before my serious, troubled years with H. So, it made me wonder about those lost years and what i could have achieved if i was monkey-free, but then again you clearly realize that there is no point in thinking of those "what ifs" because what's done is done and it's way better to focus your energy and vision on a more hopeful and bright future. It also shows me some clarity about how my mind should function freely without that ugly need for a battery or a charging system like Opiates dependence. Anyways, i still love the shit after those 34 trips!
Any news from Capt H by the way?
Good to hear about you all, stay strong and get it out, believe me it does help a great deal knowing you got "brothers and sisters" in similar situations and always remember that happiness is a state of mind
@Cane: Thank you of course, i'm sure they wouldn't have written if it wasn't for your post
and a big, fat congrats...you deserve all the best.@Brokeddownpalace: Don't know why Bupes are ineffective with you, probably as they say about different reactions to different bodies but my knowledge about Methadone is quite limited but i do know that the WD's are longer than H for example (duh?! As i said i'm very general here) You said 10 days, right? That's a big step man, keep it up and you're doing great. May i ask what doses are you on, Bupe wise?
@Case: Been a while man, great to hear you're doing well, maybe Clonadine will be enough for my final taper, meaning without Kratom as you did. Those 5 nights were really ok, waiting a call back from a new doc here, a woman as i prefer dealing with women in general, they seem to listen to me and get convinced. Nothing to convince here, will just say i did my taper by myself and only have a few doses left and can't get more atm, oh and that Suboxone gets me headaches, since no Subutex for me in Canada (I heard from someone on here that their Suboxone is white and not orange) Anyways, i would rather have some Clonadine or anything else, really, than going back to those orange fuckers i hated, oh we said they're not orange here, well, will see and will update you people.
@Subdude: Also long time no posting, hope all is well at your end. LSD in particular is totally unique in effects on different people. For example your mind has learned "not to like it" after those few unpleasant times. In my case, Even with falling into opiates addiction for years, it always represented hope and happiness for me and the last 2 times i'v done it, i was already out of addiction and the 1st 30 trips were before my serious, troubled years with H. So, it made me wonder about those lost years and what i could have achieved if i was monkey-free, but then again you clearly realize that there is no point in thinking of those "what ifs" because what's done is done and it's way better to focus your energy and vision on a more hopeful and bright future. It also shows me some clarity about how my mind should function freely without that ugly need for a battery or a charging system like Opiates dependence. Anyways, i still love the shit after those 34 trips!
Any news from Capt H by the way?
Good to hear about you all, stay strong and get it out, believe me it does help a great deal knowing you got "brothers and sisters" in similar situations and always remember that happiness is a state of mind
Last edited:
BrokedownPalace
Bluelight Crew
fucking ruined. just don;t care anymore. thats fucking prgress for you,
caseface99
Bluelight Crew
^^ Stick it out bro!
Don't cave
Don't cave
Captain.Heroin
Bluelight Crew
It sounds like you could have an elevated blood pressure.
Basically, if you have an already high blood pressure, coming off of opiates makes it worse.
This can lead to hot/cold flashes, and so it would be wise to monitor your blood pressure, and possibly get some BP meds from the doctor.
Do you exercise regularly? What's your diet like? If both of these are in check, I would say you just have high BP and could possibly use getting on BP meds.
I used to mix seroquel with benadryl and would get a euphoric opiate like high, at least I'm 99% sure it was seroquel - though it may have been trazodone since i was prescribed both a number of times between doctors i can't remember.
Just thought i'd throw that out there since similar topics were brought up.
Just got back from jogging for the first time since getting off bupe and i feel great.
Definitely planning on making this a morning routine. Should help my endorphins regenerate faster and hopefully "re-regulate" my temperature regulation system. Until now i haven't done any aerobic exercise, just pulls ups and sit ups mostly, neither of which compares to running... Which i knew would be the case i just didn't feel up to it until this morning for some reason.
Yeah, you definitely should do both, as both will help with symptoms of opiate withdrawal.
Last edited:
caseface99
Bluelight Crew
Every time I have ever gotten my blood pressure taken it's been prefect for my age/weight. Of course i wasn't totally off of bupe yet last time i had it checked, but i was still withdrawing from a taper and it was normal. Wouldn't my pulse be slightly fast if i had high blood pressure? Because if anything mine is low.
My diet is pretty inconsistent, and as for exercise i recently started jogging, it's been less then a week but i've noticed a big improvement. Went for a 20 minute run an hour ago actually and i feel great right now.
Anyway, i don't think it's high blood pressure. Plus I had those symptoms for like 6 months while taking clonidine daily, and stopping the clonidine didn't make anything worse at all.
And I've read on a few other websites that some people coming off of bupe have been reporting sensitivity to temperatures/fucked up body temp regulation. Apparently what im experiencing isn't too uncommon, and either way it's definitely getting better now - slowly but surely.
My diet is pretty inconsistent, and as for exercise i recently started jogging, it's been less then a week but i've noticed a big improvement. Went for a 20 minute run an hour ago actually and i feel great right now.
Anyway, i don't think it's high blood pressure. Plus I had those symptoms for like 6 months while taking clonidine daily, and stopping the clonidine didn't make anything worse at all.
And I've read on a few other websites that some people coming off of bupe have been reporting sensitivity to temperatures/fucked up body temp regulation. Apparently what im experiencing isn't too uncommon, and either way it's definitely getting better now - slowly but surely.
Last edited:
Captain.Heroin
Bluelight Crew
^congrats, you're doing great, man!
And yeah - where the fuck is everyone? Pull the needle out for a minute and let us know how you're doing!
Haha!
I was really busy with school, and I have been having lots of random stuff going on.
I am doing OK. Can't complain really.
B&D - I read your post man, I am really sorry to hear you had to spend time in jail. That blows.
Tons of people in the US don't spend jail time over a DUI, even multiple DUI's.
Interesting - I am wondering what else could cause this?
caseface99
Bluelight Crew
Somewhere i read some guys theory on how bupe effects your bodies ability to regulate it's temperature, i gotta see if i can find it again and then post it - or anything else related.
Of course now i can only find the websites with with shitty generic answers for people bitching about temperature issues after bupe.
Of course now i can only find the websites with with shitty generic answers for people bitching about temperature issues after bupe.
Last edited:
HdoubleODeezy
Bluelighter
i am doing shitty.. off benzos and opiates + lots of training and not much sleep or rest= im hurting and anxious and need to be enlightened.
Been&Done
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2010
- Messages
- 235
^^^You're off opiates for a while now right? I think you mentioned dealing with benzos after the Op's. Why you're training "too much" then if you're not ready or at ease? Consider less over-training, more or normal sleeping hours (6 to 8 hrs)
Plus, When do you get those sleeping hours is a very crucial point as i read in an article that 6 hours of sleep from 12 to 6 am are way better than 8 hours from 4 am to Noon. Good luck, things do only get better, yes we can have a rough day or week but life goes on, and as long as you're giving your all and doing the best you can in staying healthy and off any drug dependence, life will treat you well.
Any specific source for your lost enlightenment?
@Brokedownpalace: Happiness is a state of mind and self esteem and self confidence are essential for any progress. Plus, of course you care since you came on here and shared your bad mood with us. I might suggest changing how you view your life and yourself (maybe your nick is a sign) i can only assume that you're not too happy with either or both and that was the killer part for me during those hard years of my own addiction. I was always so confident in myself and my ambitions and set goals, i had that winner attitude that helps you deal with life and what it has to offer properly and positively. Of course, with sinking more and more into that addict life, all this positivity was slowly being flushed down the toilet, and it was me who was flushing. I remember well, a few times after scoring my 2 gms/day, yes that was my snorting dose for the last few years, and while doing those crazy ass lines (1/4 gm each) i had tears down my face, just by looking at my inner self and what has become of me and getting that "fucking ruined. just don't care anymore" feeling coupled with a sense of self destruction i never knew existed, it was a bad combo.....If i didn't love life so much and knew well that someday i was gonna get out of this dark circle, i would have probably considered taking my own life at some point.
Then, the light at the end of the tunnel, and of course to see it, i had to relocate, get on Subutex, play sports and a few other real life changes. If i can be free of my DOC dependence after 10 years (7 years daily usage to be exact!!!) so can you, i'm no superman and i loved Heroin more than my family members.
@Capt H: Yes i know about the DUI and i'm convinced it was a lesson, as i do believe in signs life gives us and that everything happens for a reason, we just have to be receptive and learn from them. It wouldn't have been the same lesson if i had been bailed out that same night, but i spent those few nights in jail so i can see for myself that this could very much be my future if i continued to play with fire, imagine if i was caught with H for example!!!!! Damn!!!
Glad to hear you're well and busy. Hope your arm is better. Thought of you many times those past few days with my 0.2 or 0.1 Sub doses (too hard to know at those microscopic levels)
Cheers
Plus, When do you get those sleeping hours is a very crucial point as i read in an article that 6 hours of sleep from 12 to 6 am are way better than 8 hours from 4 am to Noon. Good luck, things do only get better, yes we can have a rough day or week but life goes on, and as long as you're giving your all and doing the best you can in staying healthy and off any drug dependence, life will treat you well.
Any specific source for your lost enlightenment?
@Brokedownpalace: Happiness is a state of mind and self esteem and self confidence are essential for any progress. Plus, of course you care since you came on here and shared your bad mood with us. I might suggest changing how you view your life and yourself (maybe your nick is a sign) i can only assume that you're not too happy with either or both and that was the killer part for me during those hard years of my own addiction. I was always so confident in myself and my ambitions and set goals, i had that winner attitude that helps you deal with life and what it has to offer properly and positively. Of course, with sinking more and more into that addict life, all this positivity was slowly being flushed down the toilet, and it was me who was flushing. I remember well, a few times after scoring my 2 gms/day, yes that was my snorting dose for the last few years, and while doing those crazy ass lines (1/4 gm each) i had tears down my face, just by looking at my inner self and what has become of me and getting that "fucking ruined. just don't care anymore" feeling coupled with a sense of self destruction i never knew existed, it was a bad combo.....If i didn't love life so much and knew well that someday i was gonna get out of this dark circle, i would have probably considered taking my own life at some point.
Then, the light at the end of the tunnel, and of course to see it, i had to relocate, get on Subutex, play sports and a few other real life changes. If i can be free of my DOC dependence after 10 years (7 years daily usage to be exact!!!) so can you, i'm no superman and i loved Heroin more than my family members.
@Capt H: Yes i know about the DUI and i'm convinced it was a lesson, as i do believe in signs life gives us and that everything happens for a reason, we just have to be receptive and learn from them. It wouldn't have been the same lesson if i had been bailed out that same night, but i spent those few nights in jail so i can see for myself that this could very much be my future if i continued to play with fire, imagine if i was caught with H for example!!!!! Damn!!!
Glad to hear you're well and busy. Hope your arm is better. Thought of you many times those past few days with my 0.2 or 0.1 Sub doses (too hard to know at those microscopic levels)
Cheers
Last edited:
- Status