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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

How Are You In One Word? v. Do A Little Dance, Make A Little Love

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completely overwhelmed , honestly scared , and at the same time I will not quit on myself now - now is the time I have to hold it together more than ever. Those of you who know me quite well please know I am not ignoring anyone - I have a tremendous amount on my shoulders right now.
 
craving a cigarette.

sorry to hear tao, don't fuckin quit b4 the miracle. i got a lot of shit hangin on my shoulders to, we can do it together :)
 
Basket-Case Yeah, so what if it is two words hyphenated. You wanna fight about it?

I am basically giong crazy. I literally am. I am so lonely, depressed, hopeless, anxious, paranoid, regretful, sorry, helpless.. I guess it doesn't help I am strung out of MDPV, and ran out of benzos yesterday.
 
ty D's , i don't quit. And I will not start now.

Hang in brokendown - sleep will be your best friend. Along with that make sure food and water intake , even if it's a little. I find bananas are a great way to get nutrients and are easy on cns stims.
 
isolated

trying to fight the shit, i wanna go lay down in my bed. well maybe because it's almost 12, and i'm tired. lol

it's all good tho.
 
tao - hopefully you're hanging in there dude

D's - Thanks for the advice man, I appreciate it.

Big <3 to everyone else. A lot of sadness in this thread tonight :(

I gave up control and the universal energy guided me to relief.

blessed
 
yeh Mehm, feeling a lot of fucking pain out there tonight myself. Don't know what's going on - a lot of tough breaks for those I love. Things have been a lot fucking better here also :( , *shrug*
 
Disappointed

I've been waiting to try shrooms for over a couple years now and FINALLY got some. Now that I have them, I dont know if I can follow through with eating them. I'm pretty sure I have HPPD (I can go into details) and its gotten worse since the last time I rolled. I dont think I'm suitable for psychedelics anymore... Thats hard for me to accept. I've always wanted to do LSD, but wont do it until I try shrooms because of someone I know who went schitzo on LSD. So I took baby steps. I smoked Salvia and instantly developed "visual snow." MDMA probably made it worse, but the last time I rolled, it was very noticeable. Everything visual was intensified.

It could be worse though. I have my sanity (thankfully), but seeing "visual distortions" all day and night is fucking discouraging. I didn't read up on HPPD until recently because I didn't want to throw myself into a panic attack, so I waited until I was ready enough (yesterday) to accept what I have and research it. I'm actually relieved to know I'm not the only one with these "visuals" I'm having, but its still sucks pretty bad knowing what I have and how it was caused.

Life is fucking harsh sometimes. Of all the people in the world, I'm that super small percentage that got fucked over. I always had that "it could never happen to me" mindset, but obviously I was wrong. HPPD. Fucking fantastic. :(
 
I'm sure you'll have some takers on that offer, sweetp....

goodnight indeed.
 
tired
why havnt i gone back to bed?

something is keeping me awake, maybe i'll go to a noon meeting.
 
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