Harambulus
Greenlighter
My doc advised me a while back to go and see him to get some anti depressansts. At the time he alluded that there a lots of different ones implying that there are plenty to give a try.
At the time I declined as I didn't want another drug dependance.
Since then though I realized I have a habit of drug dependency where I will take whatever I think will give me a release- mephedrone, mdma, whatever other RC is knocking around which I think will fit the bill. I will take one for a bit then be repulsed by it swearing myself off drugs for the foreseeable future but then a month or so later I will start to feel like shit again daily and the thought of drugs as a release creeps into my head as a 'necessary evil'.
So I was thinking maybe an anti depressant would be a lesser of two evils compared to the wild highs and lows of illicit substances.
I'm not really a fan of serotonin agonists. I recently took quite a bit of good quality mdma and I find the high pretty boring tbh. What I like most is dopamine highs, they seem to give me the best sense of contentment which I sorely lack and search for.
So with that in mind would there be any anti depressants which may fit the bill so that I can ask my doc? I might even tell him what I said here that I'm familiar with other drugs and want to stop staking them so want a dopamine releaser to plug the gap.
Ideas?
Also are there any that don't have this long ass 2-5 week warm up period.
I find that a nuisance cos my lows are quite dependant on outside factors such that I may feel great for a week or two but not consistently so.
What would be ideal would be a mild dopamine agonist which didn't have bad side effects so I could take it when I felt an acute stab of depression then not be badly off the next day. Alcohol (not saying that is a strong dopamine agonist just using it as an example) is good in that it's negative effects are dose dependant but unfortunately I fucking hate the effects of it which only make me feel worse.
Lol, after I wrote this I am thinking a dopamine agonist used in a tempered fashion is kind of doomed to fail given the addictive nature of dopamine based drugs. Maybe if it was only mild; mild enough to provide a slight mood lift then it would not be too fiendish.
At the time I declined as I didn't want another drug dependance.
Since then though I realized I have a habit of drug dependency where I will take whatever I think will give me a release- mephedrone, mdma, whatever other RC is knocking around which I think will fit the bill. I will take one for a bit then be repulsed by it swearing myself off drugs for the foreseeable future but then a month or so later I will start to feel like shit again daily and the thought of drugs as a release creeps into my head as a 'necessary evil'.
So I was thinking maybe an anti depressant would be a lesser of two evils compared to the wild highs and lows of illicit substances.
I'm not really a fan of serotonin agonists. I recently took quite a bit of good quality mdma and I find the high pretty boring tbh. What I like most is dopamine highs, they seem to give me the best sense of contentment which I sorely lack and search for.
So with that in mind would there be any anti depressants which may fit the bill so that I can ask my doc? I might even tell him what I said here that I'm familiar with other drugs and want to stop staking them so want a dopamine releaser to plug the gap.
Ideas?
Also are there any that don't have this long ass 2-5 week warm up period.
I find that a nuisance cos my lows are quite dependant on outside factors such that I may feel great for a week or two but not consistently so.
What would be ideal would be a mild dopamine agonist which didn't have bad side effects so I could take it when I felt an acute stab of depression then not be badly off the next day. Alcohol (not saying that is a strong dopamine agonist just using it as an example) is good in that it's negative effects are dose dependant but unfortunately I fucking hate the effects of it which only make me feel worse.
Lol, after I wrote this I am thinking a dopamine agonist used in a tempered fashion is kind of doomed to fail given the addictive nature of dopamine based drugs. Maybe if it was only mild; mild enough to provide a slight mood lift then it would not be too fiendish.
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