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Psychedelic Honesty between life partners?

always be honest with your partner

to me a couple that can't trip together (or just smoke cannabis together) is doomed to fail
 
^You're correct actually: my grandparents were together 55 years and had a great relationship and they didn't trip, smoke, drink, or anything like that. Then my grandpa died, so their relationship failed. :( If only they had just tripped or smoked cannabis together...
 
Roger&Me said:
^You're correct actually: my grandparents were together 55 years and had a great relationship and they didn't trip, smoke, drink, or anything like that. Then my grandpa died, so their relationship failed. :( If only they had just tripped or smoked cannabis together...
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Hahahahahahahaha!! Shit you gotta go back in time to their first date and slip some 2C-B in their food.

Can you imagine all the relationships that evolved in medieval Europe? holy shit... these guys didn't trip or smoke cannabis AT ALL! Shit, I guess it was a sad time for relationships... ALL DOOMED TO FAIL!

Then again, with the hygiene levels back then who would want to do anything with anybody. The mere thought of medieval cunnilingus makes me cringe with sharp disgust.
 
what i mean is... couples that can't be honest with one another about their use of entheogens or psychedelics seem doomed to fail

if you can't be honest about your trips, which really bares you soul... what can you be honest about?
 
Well I can agree, ultimately. However, my wife and I are now honest about that (or rather, I'm honest about it now that she sees value in the experience). She's tripped once now and will again in the future, and I am finally able to share my experiences with her. But for many years I hid it. I'm not proud of it, but it's resolved itself now, and we're happily married.
 
I think this is way oversimplifying. To say that someone's relationship is fake because there is an aspect of it where there is dishonesty is silly. I mean, if your relationship truly doesn't contain any dishonesty, then more power to you and I'm glad for you, but I would venture to say that almost every relationship contains some dishonest moments or aspects. And I'd caution you to really think about whether there's really and truly nothing you don't try to hide from your partner. And like I said, if there really honestly isn't then good for you. But I doubt it.
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Perhaps I was misunderstanding what the original poster was asking... and I wasn't clear in what I was saying. Coffee hadn't kicked in yet. I know things aren't always black or white.

I do however strongly feel that if there is a pattern of hiding drug usage, be it opiates, psychedelics, or whatever else, that constitutes a problem. Regular drug usage is going to have an impact in the lives of those around you.

I understand that we aren't obligated to explain and express every minute of existence to our partners, but I do believe an intentional pattern of hiding drug usage is a sign of a deeper problem.

Certainly the odd trip here or there, or taking a few xanax or percocets and not telling the other, doesn't have to mean the worst. I was speaking to the OP situation, or what I understood from the post.
 
My main reason for consciously making the effort of telling is that there's kids roaming around & sometimes it's wisest that it's known it would be a mistake to expect you to drive the kids to x y or god forbid Z.


Things aren't black & white in a psychedelic world they're a shade of purple!


I do however strongly feel that if there is a pattern of hiding drug usage, be it opiates, psychedelics, or whatever else, that constitutes a problem
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I concur
 
To chime in here, consuming psychoactives is just like any activity IMO.

Would you go Rock Climbing and not tell your S/O, or a friend? Would you drive to another state and not let anyone know?

There are some basic principles that are valuable to your safety, and to maintain peace within a relationship.

By omission is tricky to decipher whether it is lying, or a "need-to-know" subject. If you know your partner prefers to be open about usage, and/or may have a certain apprehension or sensitivity thereof to nondisclosure this would obviously mean the boundaries are drawn.

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In my experience, not tripping with my S/O for extended periods of time was MORE detrimental to the relationship. Helpful tools for communication and understanding-- perspective essentially. :)
 
on the same note though, should you feel obligated to let your significant other know beforehand each and every time you are about to go rock climbing? espescially if you're already in clear view of the cliff!
 
thenightwatch said:
on the same note though, should you feel obligated to let your significant other know beforehand each and every time you are about to go rock climbing? espescially if you're already in clear view of the cliff!
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Well, first rule of rock climbing is you let someone know where we will be pursuing said activity. You know, those instances where climbers go missing. ;)

Similar principle applies in my book.
 
I trip my partner and would rather trip with her than anyone else, I find it a much more enjoyable and pleasant experience as it is with someone I trust and feel comfortable around always.
 
i am my partner's trip guide. i have had somewhere in the 400+ psychedelic experiences range. she has now had about 10, all with me, and is growing wonderfully. i share every single thought in my head with her.
 
I just thought of something about honesty in relationships. Not much to do with psychedelics but is about how much to divulge. Are some things just better left unsaid?

I very high proportion of young men masturbate to pornography. Generally you don't tell your partner "Hun, for the sake of honesty; sometimes when you're not around I watch porn and beat off".

Just wondering what other's thoughts are on something like that. Are some natural things that don't affect the relationship better left unsaid?
 
Underground Troll and myself are in a relationship, and we have used psychedelics together ever since we became a couple three years ago. There has definitely been some dishonesty, and it's always been me. I am also the one who consumes more psychedelics. Underground Troll has tripped on a variety of substances, but not as much as me. I most definitely have had addiction problems with psychedelics, where I would take them secretly and not tell, and know that I should. I have a totally greata relationship, and had no reason to do so, seeing as how Underground Troll and I have used research chemicals together. But when I was younger, I was raised in a very very drugs are bad atmosphere, and I think just being high on psychedelics in and of itself made me secretive, and that couple with the frequency in which i was tripping, made me dishonest with myself and others about tripping.

It's not like I would lie about every single trip, but sometimes I would just do some 2c-t-7 in a low dose, or hoop a bit of 2C-E, just to get to know the compound, and I wouldn't be soooo out of my mind that I couldn't do normal things. Sometimes I would take it, and then halfway through the trip kind of sheepishly be like "yeah i'm tripping on this ____", and it was always kind of weird. Before you mention it, no one even suspects anything, then you tell them, and you both know you're not on the same level, and then it does become all weird.

The whole dishonesty thing culminated when I got 4 grams of ketamine and didn't mention that purchase. I did it secretly for a bunch of days, and then one day before bed I did some secretly in the bathroom, went to lie down, and my heart was beating all crazy and i just seemed all fucked up, and then I broke down and fessed up a bunch of personal problems about not being able to control my drug use.

So yeah, I have a drug problem, and my drugs of choice to abuse are psychedelics. I especially love ketamine, i sure can abuse the hell out of that stuff. I really don't like abusing psychedelics, and I feel like it's something that I really have left behind me. Ever since that ketamine episode I have been much more honest, just because when you see first hand and experince first hand the kind of damage dishonesty does to a relationship, and you experience those feelings of guilt and stupidity, it's a big wake up call, "what the hell is important to me here ???"

Yeah, i'm not proud of it, but it happens. I really really really love to do drugs, lots. Lots of doings lots of drugs. I smoke weed multiple times a day every day.
 
My girlfriend knows I use drugs. She doesn’t necessarily like it, but seems to understand that I do and is OK with it. I will occasionally say a pro-psychedelic sentence or two, but that’s usually the end of the conversation. Otherwise, when I’m planning a trip I say I’m going to be “in dispose” or “trying some new concoction” and we leave it at that.

A little over a month ago I was on 2.5 hits of strong blotter and ended up going to see her in the evening without telling her. Halfway through the night she tells me she’s excited about taking her kitten over to meet her friend’s kitten to have a “kitty play date,” and she says it with such a genuine enthusiasm and innocence that I just lose it. I start laughing hysterically and crying. This is my life. I’m comfortable, have few responsibilities, control over my drug use, yet I still have access to chemicals that regularly make me feel like I have the keys to heaven.

“Are you crying? You girl!” she says.

Between bursts of giggles I copped to the fact I had taken LSD, and that it was a huge relief to get that off my chest. I told her how beautiful I thought my life was and how happy I was to be here. I have no idea what I did to deserve a life so grand, and the reminders that I have it and the gratitude I feel are sometimes just too much in a way that is so good.
 
PepperSocks said:
Just wondering what other's thoughts are on something like that. Are some natural things that don't affect the relationship better left unsaid?
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To each their own, but if it is so natural why censor discussion about it? I suppose I have a different perspective being in a relationship for 7 years, after this amount of time its always intriguing and valuable to share "quirks". I mean if you are insecure sharing certain information with that person, isn't that going to eventually hurt communication in general throughout the partnership?

The longer you are with someone, the harder it is on you as a person- and straining on the relationship all together to conceal things about you, and who you are. Seems like it would cause personality conflicts and a bit of guilt.

It really shouldn't be about seeking someones approval or permission, but a little respect and communication goes a long way. Transparency is golden.

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psood0nym - thanks for sharing that story, made me smile. :)
 
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